Peregrine was frustrated, which might once have been distinctly uncharacteristic of her, but now was becoming rather routine. She paced along the Abaven border, keeping a healthy distance so as not to be seen as a threat until she figured out what the fuck she was doing there. What was it about these little brown fae that kept creeping into her mind, bringing her back here? Hadn't they had enough? Peregrine knew that she couldn't keep disappearing and then creeping back, she knew that Sparrow had every right to tell her to fuck off and stay gone. There wasn't much in Peregrine's life that she regretted, and less that she bothered thinking 'What if?' over. One was Aerie, another was the shy, fiery little fae. A couple others, but... well, you get the point. And damn, was it ever irritating. Tsiry of course was endlessly amused by the whole business. "I thought you were a busy woman," she mocked in a gentle tone that cut no corners, going right for the throat. "So much to do, you know. You must have very important business with Miss Sparrow for us to come all this way-" Peregrine turned with a huff. "Stuff it, or I will remove it from your body and very literally stuff it for you." Tsiry laughed at the empty threat. "Oh don't mind me. And don't worry, 'Guilty Conscience' suits you." Peregrine seethed out a long, withering sigh. As usual, her constant companion was not far off the mark. Peregrine knew things were distinctly, categorically unresolved between Sparrow and herself, much to Peregrine's chagrin. She was just too inept to function as a basic creature ought to. Couldn't stay still, infamous for poor decision making, and not to mention the worst luck of any breathing creature to walk the lands for at least the last century. Was she throwing herself a bit of a pity party? Perhaps. But she refused to blame herself. It was that or admit to the true cacophony of emotions swirling farther down on a deeper level. Nope. Gonna leave that right where it was. Not fuckin' with that, nope nope nope. She was just here to make things right. She needed that peace in her life, and the time had long since passed to make it so. "Talk" "You" Think "Tsiry"

There was one thing consistent in Sparrow's life: inconsistency. Sparrow had learned that nothing stayed in one place... especially wolves.

She was just about fed up of trying to make lasting connections, but now that she was the alpha she had to decide if she was to be a distant alpha or one that sought to connect with her members.

Sparrow sighed, a pain coming to the back of her head. The small woman scrunched her nose as she walked the border. She was so zoned out, she almost didn't notice the scent of Peregrine drifting close to the pack lands. Her mind registered one thing: non-pack wolf.

Sparrow's fur bristled. She REALLY didn't want to test out Kanja's training just yet.

"Who goes there? Be warned, you are encroaching upon Abaven lands, Sparrow called, her voice commanding but not threatening. "If you seek an audience with the alpha, you've found her. If not, I suggest wandering the other-" Wait... she DID recognize that scent.

"PEREGRINE?"

Peregrine was no where close to forming a decision when she was found. She cursed under her breath at the timing of it all. Naturally! She stood frozen in place as a familiar voice lashed out over the otherwise tranquil scene, clearly audible over the dull rumble of the rapids in the distance. Peregrine found a moment's difficulty rationalizing the tone with the sweet young woman she'd known. Then she remembered the few times Sparrow had chewed her out and, yeah, she could see it. She cleared her throat awkwardly, about to announce herself, when the voice carried on. Wait, wait, wait. Alpha? Peregrine's jaw dropped, and her shoulders sagged as all of the wind left her in a rush, confusion taking it's place. What on earth? It wasn't that she was... surprised, it's just- Okay so maybe she was surprised but that didn't mean she wouldn't support her friend! And she certainly wasn't jealous. Nope, not at all. "PEREGRINE?" the voice asked with enough force to make Peregrine wince. "Er, hello again, Sparrow!" She shifted awkwardly on her paws. "Ah, you're... uhm, you're the alpha of Abaven now? Goodness, how things do change." She tried her best to pass off a feckless chuckle, uncertain of whether or not the other woman would buy it. Gods above, her head was spinning. If this was her karmic payback, Peregrine would accept it as her due. Just please let her keep her friend in the process... "Talk" "You" Think "Tsiry"

Sparrow wanted to say she was more surprised than just on the surface level that Peregrine had returned once more, but she wasn't really. The small girl was learning that Peregrine would probably never be a permanent facet in her life.

Peregrine stumbled with an awkward sort-of catching up starter. Sparrow rolled her eyes, "Yeah, things tend to change over, what was it? A year? Longer?"

Her tone was a little too sharp. She let out a breath, her ears pulling back.

"Why did you come back?"

As much as she wanted to rush Peregrine and coax her into joining her pack and... maybe some other things, Sparrow felt like she needed to keep herself guarded. Peregrine had come back before and she had left before. What made this time any different?

Sparrow was cold, sure, but Peregrine supposed she had every right to be. Her response may have been delivered with just an eye roll, but the obvious hurt there lashed out at Pere like a whip. She winced as she realized that yeah, it had been about a year. Her ears flicked backwards and her eyes dropped. "Yeah, something like that," she said in a weak voice, uniquely uncharacteristic for her and nigh-unrecognizable. Tsiry gave her an odd look, somewhere between confusion and sympathy. Pere, on the other hand, brought her eyes back up to give Sparrow a long, searching look. Things really had changed in a year. She felt a hardness in the other woman that she had hoped (naively) would be absent. What had happened in the past year to put it there, she wondered, or was it reserved specifically for her? "It seems like leadership suits you," she said in a quiet voice, unable to completely hide the sadness which lurked there. "I hope it's treating you well." I hope it's made you happy, she thought, but left unsaid. As to why she had come back... Well, why did she come back? Peregrine looked to the side, anywhere but into the tired eyes of the fae before her. She had come here for her, of course, but perhaps for herself as well. It wasn't that she was seeking forgiveness, because she didn't really expect to find it there, but perhaps... A chance. She sighed, and turned back to fix Sparrow with a molten gaze. "I guess I came back to see you, but also... To say sorry. I never wanted to be another wolf just flitting in and out of your life, but I guess you could say I have commitment issues." It was meant to be phrased as a joke, but the words came out sour and twisted her expression into something mournful. Memories of Aerie, never far from the front of her mind, floated back to the surface. Peregrine never claimed to be a saint, but that didn't mean she found any pleasure in fostering hope and opportunity just to cast it aside. She had had such great dreams as a pup, as a yearling, dreams that she could do great things and find great adventures. Instead she had bumbled her way through misadventure after misadventure. Sure, there had been great times and fond memories, but those weren't the ones which kept her from finding restful sleep at night. "I suppose I came just to see you. To check in. I can't claim any ability to clean up the pieces of the various messes I've made, but that doesn't mean I don't regret making them." She shrugged, hopeless. It was remarkably difficult for Peregrine to confess her feelings with this degree of raw truth, hard for her to even speak without a sly quirk in her lips, let alone... well, whatever this was. It made her distinctly uncomfortable, even, and she shifted in place as a flight response welled up within her. No, she told herself commandingly, forcing her traitorous paws to stay put. Sparrow deserved far better, and it was long past time Peregrine started acting accountable. If she screwed up, the consequences were hers and hers alone. "Talk" "You" Think "Tsiry"

Sparrow wanted to scream. Why did Peregrine always make her want to scream? It was frustrating how much she wanted to beat the shit out of the other woman and then force her to stay.

Peregrine said leadership suited her. That was a lie. She said she hoped it was treating Sparrow well. A dry laugh escaped Sparrow's lips.

"Me too," she said. "Tell me, how many wolves do you scent on the borders? Most of the pack left-" Sparrow hesitated for just a moment, swallowing. She had told Peregrine about her family, right? "Along with my father and sister. If I'm not able to bring in more wolves, Abaven will die by my paw."

Peregrine seemed honestly regretful and it was harder than Sparrow cared to admit to not just try to comfort the other woman. Peregrine said she never intended to be another wolf coming in and out of Sparrow's life.

Another dry laugh.

"I don't know what I expect anymore," she said flatly.

Peregrine said she came to check in and Sparrow's ears flattened. She didn't know why that phrase seemed to cut her heart. "Check in? Y- you're planning on leaving again already?"

Sparrow didn't realize her voice had cracked. Her cold, angry exterior shattering in an instant, revealing the needy, lonely Sparrow. The Sparrow who had lost most of her family and suddenly became the alpha. The Sparrow who's only friends vanished for seasons at a time without a word.

Suddenly, it was like she was a little kid again.

"What's making you leave? If- even if it's not forever... would it be so bad to stay-" with me, she thought "-just for a little while?"

Sparrow's eyes dropped to Peregrine's paws for a moment before she looked back up to the larger woman as if to ask 'please.'

Rock Walk

There was something in the other woman's eye, reinforced of course by her dry laugh and clipped words, and it settled cold and heavy in Peregrine's stomach. The life of a leader seemed to sit no softer on Sparrow's shoulders than it had on hers. Whatever mockery of strength had been left in Pere's frame fled her as she wilted again. Her packmates had left her, her family had left her and dumped the pack on her... It almost seemed like Sparrow didn't even want it. But she was still there, holding on to the home she had always known, and perhaps whatever good memories still lurked there. Peregrine didn't know. She wanted to, but she could hardly think at all past the heartbreak she felt for the other woman. There was nothing she could do or say to express it, but Peregrine felt a thread of connection tighten within her. She could only imagine that the feelings of loss and mourning she had felt as her own pack was lost to her would be even stronger for the smaller fae before her. Something inside of Peregrine twinged and hurt. She couldn't let Sparrow know that pain. "Abaven isn't going anywhere," she said in a gentle but firm voice. Whatever happened, Peregrine would not allow that to come to pass. She was afraid to swear it to Sparrow, to have another promise between them waiting to be broken, but she would swear it to herself. If only she could swear to keep her own paws out of her mouth. Peregrine winced as the meaning of her words was mistaken by Sparrow, watching as the her distant exterior broke away to show something much different beneath. She hadn't meant she'd intended to leave after this, only... Well, she didn't really expect Sparrow to want her to stay. She realized that instead maybe all Sparrow needed was someone she could really lean on, even if for a moment. Peregrine pressed forward, coming just within the boundaries of Sparrow's personal space. "Hey, I didn't mean it like that," she said quietly. "It's only, I figured you'd have run my ass all the way to the ocean by now." She attempted a tiny laugh and a wink, trying to muster whatever charm she might have once had. "I won't promise to stay, because I don't want to break any more promises. To anyone. But I can promise that as long as I'm able, I will always come back." She wouldn't lie. Wanderlust was as much a part of her as her heart and lungs. But there was something about this small earthen fae that drew her back over and over again.  "If you really mean it, I would be honored to call Abaven my home for as long as it will have me," she said with a soft smile. It was undercut by a subtle fear that Sparrow would decide she couldn't forgive Peregrine's coming and going, would tell her to leave and stay gone that time. Peregrine decided it was worth the risk. "Talk" "You" Think

Peregrine reassured her that Abaven wasn't going to crumble under her. Sparrow was truly thankful.

The larger woman said she had just though Sparrow would have run her to the ocean, but promised that she would return as long as she was able. Sparrow wasn't able to hold herself back, she rushed forward and pressed herself into Peregrine's chest.

Peregrine said she would... be happy to call Abaven home? Her breath hitched. She was happy, but her throat stung and her eyes filled with tears. Sparrow buried her face into Peregrine's chest, hoping the larger woman wouldn't be able to tell she was crying.

After a moment, Sparrow tore herself away.

"I... have an idea," she said slowly, clearing her throat.

"My father told me Abaven was meant to rent out mercenaries. I though, maybe, taking that concept, but applying it to all of Abaven. Making Abaven a hub for trades and skills. Let wolves come to Abaven when they are in search of goods or in search of those with particular skills- or perhaps if they are wishing to trade their own good or skills for others.

"Then, have Abaven handle the rest. We need stock, though. We need to accumulate those with skills. We- I need someone who wants to travel. Someone who can spread the word and direct those to Abaven so that we can- one day- become a pack buzzing with activity from those both in and outside of out pack."

Sparrow paused after she had spilled her idea to Peregrine. A small smile rested on her face, her tears having dried.

"Do you... want to be our first traveler? Call Abaven home, but let yourself still wander- as long as you still come home in the end... more frequently than... you know... once a year."