((Being a tiny bit vague with timing, I want this set after Emile's phase 2 thread but not sure his outcome yet.))

Emile knew he couldn't keep this up, the crushing weight of his guilt. The torment of the voices that taunted him in the voices of his family... and one former friend. The dissappointment of waking up in the morning to see he had survived another night... The image of his body laying broken at the bottom of the ravine... All the other impulse thoughts he'd gotten to do something that would end it all, would finally take the pain from his shoulders. The way his skin was starting to hang loose from his frame as he continued to push just how much he could starve himself.

Emile needed to tell someone, couldn't bear it by himself. His father had promised to help him and Emile was desperate. He waited for night to fall, waited to be sure he wouldn't bump into her when he finally pull himself from his depression den, the pile of blankets and furs that he'd cocooned himself in through later afternoon and evening. Emile stalked through the halls of the castle, eyes wide and ears perked for any sign of anyone who might spot him, might stop him... Or worse... Bowen. But mercifully he arrived at his father's door unaccosted. He swallowed the lump forming in his throat. He could already imagine the disappointment on his father's face when he realized that despite his best efforts Emile had slid further from the light since their last talk...

Not for lack of trying, he'd even been slowly becoming comfortable being out in the open, sticking mostly to himself and chewing on his resentment yes but it had been progressing... "You're so selfish." Emile practically flinched as the words sounded in his head, guilt gnawed at him. Guilt over failing to keep moving forward, guilt over thinking he deserved to. Guilt for hurting his once friend. Guilt for being such a drain on the pack and his family. He, not for the first time, thought how much better off they'd be without him. Emile pushed back the sobs that threatened to choke him and he knocked on his father's door before those thoughts could become strong enough to stop him from trying to get help... Even if he didn't deserve it.

"Ddddddad?" He called out, pushing the crown of his skull into the door and unable to keep the waver from his voice. "I th... think I nnnnnneed help."


Speech

Art by Rivaah

Ulric was laying in bed attempting to sleep beside Eska. Attempting was truly the key word here as he continued to struggle to sleep. The ever present darkness was messing with his sleep as much as the stress of the changing world was and the only reason he got any sleep at all was just physically exhausting himself through the day with patrols and work. He didn't have a chance to fully slip into slumber though before he heard a knock on the door. He blinked sleep from his eyes, lifting his head to look at the door with a confused furrow in his brow. Who was coming to their room this late? He got his answer in the form of his son's voice calling to him from the other side of the door. He glanced at Eska who had just begun to stir and he rested a paw on her shoulder to keep her from getting up, saying quietly how he'd be back before he slipped out of bed. Emile was the last wolf he would have expected to have coming to find him like this, but after so much time spent estranged from his brindled son he was just glad that Emile was finally trying to reach out for help.

He opened the door enough to look out at his son and after seeing the distressed look on his face he quietly slipped out of the room and closed the door behind him. "Emile?" he asked as he looked to the young man with a concerned look, keeping his voice down so he wouldn't wake anyone trying to sleep in the rooms that lined the corridor. He glanced up at the thought and decided it was probably best if they moved away from the other bedrooms just in case, wanting to make sure Emile had some privacy before he told him what was going on. He nodded for his son to follow and he stepped across into the hallway that connected the east and west wings of the castle, thin windows that lined the walls letting in the cool moonlight. Once they had some more space between them and the rest of the pack he turned to face Emile again, settling back onto his haunches. "What's going on?"

Ulric Adravendi