Her things were packed. At least the few things that she believed of as her own. She'd been given her Koto and her Shamisen and leaving them behind would make her genuinely sad. The Koto was the last thing that she had to pack. Delicate digits ran softly over the long strings, one claw giving a single string a pluck, sending a humming thrum through the air. Iki matched the tone with a hum of her own, the fae's soft vibrato echoing throughout the chamber.

Soon she would be leaving for Elysium and the cold northeastern climate would become her new home. Ikigai was a tropical wolf. Ashen was a very warm climate no matter what time of year. It would be a drastic difference as she would be traveling to her new home in the beginning of spring. There would still be snow on the ground and the air would still be cold. Ikigai wondered if she might beg a fur cloak from Manea until she could acquire her own.

With her back to the door, the snow and ink princess sighed. All of this had been her idea in order to benefit Ashen. Still... that didn't make leaving her home and her family any easier. Once more Ikigai ran dark pads over the strings of her instrument, playing a chord which she again mimicked with well honed vocals.

"Ikigai"

Kotori had been making his rounds about the Ashen lands, making sure all was well in this pack he had agreed to assist in protecting for the season.  This wasn’t just about his dad’s arranged deal though he knew there was significance to that.  Venom was a leader worthy of respect and to be honest it was even more important because she was Ikigai’s mom.  If he had to lose Ikigai then at least he could give her this as a present, protection for her mom.  Whether it would have meaning or if Iki would ever even know of it were unknown but that part didn’t really matter.  Kotori knew.

Two sounds were heard at the same time, separate yet entwined together.  One of the sounds he knew though never quite in that fashion.  Had she not left?  Kotori’s steps picked up, needing to know if he was right or not and to make sure she didn’t disappear if it was truly not his imagination.

“Iki?” Kotori spoke with clear surprise when he spotted the princess that had once been his, at least in his own mind.  “I thought you were gone,” his voice soft yet a deepness to it.  “What is it?” Kotori nodded down to the instrument eyes shifted up to her.   He didn’t go to embrace her even as he certainly thought of it.  She wasn’t his now.

"Kotori Fatalis"

A voice sounded from behind her and Ikigai's heart clenched. The pale princess looked over one black marked shoulder and gave the man a small, sad smile. "Kotori," she spoke his name in soft greeting. He thought that she was gone and, while that had been the initial plan, she'd been here the whole time, her mother having decided that she would wait until her birthday before joining Elysium. "Only for a few more days." Then she would be off to her new life.

Kotori then asked what her instrument was. "This is a Koto," she informed him, looking down at the long, stringed instrument. "It was a gift from my father and the Shamisen," she motioned to a closed case nearby, "was from my grandmother." He sat nearby but he didn't sit too close, nor did he embrace her as he may have prior. It bothered Ikigai a bit, but it was for the best that they didn't get too close. This was already difficult for her. Had he only said something sooner...

Without being asked, Ikigai took a deep breath, then began to pluck and stroke the strings of the Koto, bringing about dramatic and somewhat soothing twangs that echoed within the stone walls of the chamber. The song was slow and melancholy, becoming even more haunting when the snowy fae's maw parted and she began to sing. Ikigai's voice was practiced, perfect and clear, her lilting tones melding with that of the Koto as she sang in her father's tongue. A sad song of lost love, but Kotori wouldn't know that. She sang it for him, however.

"Ikigai"

Kotori had been working at getting over himself.  It was childish to cling to something emotionally if it wouldn’t do him any good if it was a thing he just couldn’t have.  Now here she was in front of him again and he felt an ache inside of him that no physical pain could imitate.  It would feel both better and worse if he had embraced her.  A momentary pleasure to ease a pain that would only become worse a moment later.  Self-control felt horrible but it was for the best.  

He nodded as she spoke of where the instruments had come from and he assumed family gifts would have all the more sentimental value as she left her pack.  Kotori remained silent, listening to her play, the strings bringing forth a sound that fit the tone of the moment.  There was something to the music that seemed to flow in him and entwine with his own emotional state.  

If the strings weren’t enough then when she added her voice into it he felt his soul strings being pulled on.  It was true Kotori had no idea what the song was about but it didn’t matter.  Words could be klunky things at times but this music between her voice and strings and his own current emotions filled him and became linked to his soul’s pain.  It was unlikely he’d forget this moment or her song.  Kotori might have joined in the music except he neither knew this song to keep pace with it as well as Iki did nor was his voice as well trained as hers to mold.  It would be a shame to mess it up.

However, the music was too much to hold back some emotions.  Kotori stood up and quietly moved to sit beside her, not quite touching but about as close as you could get without doing so.  Somehow, even not touching, he could feel her presence right there.  He’d listen till the music stopped, “that was beautiful.  It sounded so sad.  I wish I’d heard you sing that before.”  So this was one of her talents she had learned instead of hunting and fighting.  How much time would it take one to learn such as this?  “When I have children someday if one wanted to learn and our packs would be on good terms, would you let my child visit to learn from you?”  Should have been their child.  

Kotori had never thought of music to have any special appreciation for it.  He didn’t know if it was just because of Ikigai or if he just genuinely liked it.  “I’m afraid I don’t expect I’d have any talent to teach it.  I’d probably sound horrible trying,” said with a small smile, a bit of trying for a lighter tone away from the sadness felt.

"Kotori Fatalis"

Ikigai continued playing, pouring all of the rampant emotions into both the music and her singing. She was singing and playing for Kotori, for her mother, for the family that she would leave behind, her home and the uncertainties that lay before her. In time her song came to its natural end. The fae hadn't realized that her eyes had drifted closed, but when she opened them again, Kotori was sitting directly beside her.

The man complimented her music and Ikigai nodded, dark ears pulling back as she did so. He also mentioned that it sounded sad and she gave a soft, sad laugh. "It was very sad," she agreed with him. He wished that he'd heard her sing before, but what difference would that have made? It wouldn't have changed what was happening now. It wouldn't have changed anything. He hadn't told her of his wishes for the future and now there was no chance for that. She would be married and it wouldn't be to Kotori.

As sad as they both were, Kotori seemed to have accepted that they would never be. He asked if she might teach his children music someday and Ikigai inwardly winced, but nodded in agreement. "I would be happy to do that for you, Kotori," she agreed, but her voice was soft and sad. They had to let each other go even though they never had one another to begin with. He tried to joke to lighten the mood, but there wasn't much that could lighten the heaviness resting between them.

"I expect this is the last time we'll see each other for a long time," the pallid fae spoke softly. Against her better judgement, the woman reached out with her dainty, dexterous digits and took Kotori's much larger paw in her own. "I'm sorry that things weren't different, Kotori." Then she closed the distance between them, leaning her shoulder against his own before reaching up and placing a gentle kiss upon the side of his muzzle.

"Ikigai"

He shouldn’t have found her here, it would have been better for both of them if this moment hadn’t happened.  Yet, Kotori imagined neither would forget this time.  Emotions were too clogged and a tangent from what could have been to what will be diverged strongly here.  She agreed to train one of his kids if it should happen and while he was glad it was a hollow sort of glad.  It was the type of thing he felt would be good later when they had grown used to the separation but right now it was a reminder of what they wouldn’t have.

Kotori nodded reluctantly as she spoke of not seeing him for a long time.  She apologized things weren’t different and he could only let out a huff as he once again felt reminded of how he had screwed up.  This was all his fault.  If he had thought to speak up on his plans sooner then she wouldn’t be leaving and there would be a future for the two of them.  He wouldn’t let something like this happen again.  No more putting off what could be done today until tomorrow, at least not where it was important matters such as future dreams.

“Me too.” The words subdued.  “It’s my fault after all.” It wasn’t just a generic stab at himself, it was letting her know Kotori didn’t blame her.  It wouldn’t be fair to separate with Iki thinking he blamed her.  His eyes glanced down to her paw on his eyes, the feeling of static suddenly there, then her shoulder touching against his followed by the kiss.  Kotori turned his own head to return the kiss, across her own muzzle with mournful eyes searching her own.

“Iki, I’m going to be starting my own pack.  I’ll be challenging against another and if I win I’ll have to form my own allies.  I’ll visit Elysium then and I will work on making sure we are under good terms.  So I’ll see you then.  I’ll see how you are doing with,” a moment of hesitation on what to say, “with your new life” That seemed easier to say than with your mate.

Not that Kotori had a lot of diplomatic knowledge but he had asked Venom to help give him pointers on being an alpha.  Whether it was her or dad, he would make sure to get a few pointers before jumping into things.  Kotori knew respect was needed of course but, what else?  He had no children to give away yet as bargaining chips.  How normal was that as a method?  Dad hadn’t ever done it as far as he knew. Kotori imagined he should move apart after the kiss, instead he tilted his head to press his forehead up against Ikigai's head.  They only had this for a short time right?  It was already painful, right?  It was painful but it also felt good.  He didn't want it to end just yet now that they were here.

"Kotori Fatalis"

Kotori returned her kiss and Ikigai's heart clenched. She felt almost sick to her stomach thinking about what could have been between them. It would have been so, so good. They would have found love together, she was sure of it. Deals had been struck that could not be undone and so there was a chance that neither of them would find the love that they deserved. She hoped that Kotori would be able to find someone worthy of him in time and that his life would be a wonderful, fulfilling one. There was a chance that she wouldn't be so lucky, but it was the hand that she'd drawn and she would play it.

The earthen man accepted the blame and Ikigai shook her head, brow furrowing. "You didn't share your plans with me and I didn't share mine with you. The blame lays with us both if there is any blame to be had." Neither knew the plans of the other or they could have worked together to ally Ashen and the Armada with blood. Things just didn't work out that way and they both had to live with the results of their silence.

As the pair sat there together, Kotori shared his plans with her. New plans. He was going to start his own pack and he was going to work hard to make sure that his pack and Elysium were on good terms. The pale woman laughed softly, sadly. "Part of the deal for joining Elysium is that I will act as their diplomat, so if the decision is up to me, we will be allies, Kotori." She couldn't imagine fighting with him or with his pack, but she wouldn't be in charge so the ultimate decision wouldn't be up to her. She would fight like hell to keep them on good terms, however.

"I'm going to confront my father before I leave for Elysium," she informed Kotori. "I have things that need to be said and he's going to listen." Iki sighed, shaking her head yet again. "I don't even know if he'll care. I don't know if he'll answer my call." The woman motioned absently with one obsidian dipped paw, "A member of Elysium, the alpha's brother, is going to accompany me there, then we'll be traveling to Elysium together after." She didn't know why she was telling him all this, but it seemed like the right thing to do.

"Ikigai"