It happened so slowly that she barely noticed it.

Small things, at first. Blips in her memory. Walking into a classroom and forgetting why she'd needed to enter the room at all. Stopping while collecting herbs, lost in thought, until she left in the middle of the task and wandered back towards her den. The devil of it all was that she didn't recall these lapses at all. Even in the worst of it, when she lost hours of time, she'd come to (sometimes hours away from pack lands), and quickly make her way back as if it was the most normal thing in the world. She made excuses - yes, she was working hard. Perhaps she was dozing off while standing. At first no one noticed. They were spread thin as it was, teachers spending more time with students than with other faculty. It was easy to fall beneath the radar.

Until it wasn't.

Until she woke up, as if from a deep slumber, standing stomach-deep in a snow drift, so far north that her spit seemed to freeze whenever she opened her mouth. Theory had turned slowly in a circle, wading in the snow, wondering why, why, why am I here - then where am I - and then who am I - and finally, as if transported by a deity, she woke up in her den to Corvus shaking her awake. Her paw pads were bleeding. Her nose was frost bitten. Where were you? What is going on? Please, just tell me... A part of her ear was dead and black, but she couldn't see it. Didn't feel it. She opened her mouth to say something, anything -

And she must have said something. But now she was here. And Corvus - Corvus? That shy, older wolf, assigned her mentor... she hoped she'd impressed him - was nowhere to be found.

Theory was deep in the thicket now, days (or months? Time had become an ephemeral thing, impossible to keep track of) later. The thicket both real and metaphorical. Even as she shouldered through the thorns, she felt herself fighting her own mind. Why had she gone this way? Wasn't there somewhere she needed to be? There was someone she had to meet... she'd sent Alouette ahead, right? Theory looked warily towards the empty sky, a dismal light grey. The sun was either not up yet or hidden somewhere behind thick cloud cover. Alouette was nowhere to be found.

Alouette's wings, battered by hail, had given out when she'd followed Theory into the north. The raven, entombed in ice, would not be discovered until the snow melted in the late summer.

She was so used to the shuffle of wings nearby that it felt eerily quiet. Every step deeper into the brambles cut her, but she felt far enough removed from her body that it barely registered. Her ribs were visible easily now, her fur matted and dull. There was something she had to do... somewhere she had to be...

The fluidity of time was a strange thing. It felt like she'd settled back into life within Aerie quite some time ago, but at the same time it felt like it was just yesterday that she'd been living in Abaven, though she'd left the pack in the east nearly a year ago now. The original reason for joining them seemed so distant now, because she'd wanted to stay for Theory and that had clouded her judgment. At the end of the day though, she'd returned home; Thalia's loyalty ultimately lay to the Abraxas and her family, no matter how strong her feelings might've been for the former leader. As time passed and she'd seen no sign of Theory, nor news from Abaven, she'd been able to slowly push her feelings deep down - until they were practically inaccessible to her. Only occasionally did she recall how sick Theory had been when she'd sent her away. The wolves of Aerie had recovered from the strange illness that had plagued the continent, she had no doubt the wolves of Abaven had recovered just as well. Saying she hadn't thought of Theory at all would be a lie, but it'd been a while since she'd let herself really stop and reflect on their time together. That is, until her scent suddenly crossed her path, in a place she hadn't expected to find her. She was making a wide arc around the thicket when she noticed it, strong enough that it signaled she'd been here, and recently too. Only when she drew closer did the scent of blood become apparent, and though she was wary about whatever she might find she was understandably worried, too. If Theory was hurt, why was she so far from home? Or was that the reason she hadn't gone home? Thalia was slowly as she trailed after her scent, carefully navigating deeper into the thicket, against her better judgment. When she finally saw her though she wasn't quite sure how to feel. She didn't look at all like Thalia remembered, but that wasn't necessarily a good thing. She remembered it vividly, the way strange-colored ooze had been leaking from her eyes and nose and mouth, the way she'd nearly been feral with rage for a reason Thalia maybe could've chalked up to sickness, but she'd taken it as an easy way out. And now here Theory was and Thalia found herself frozen to the spot, trying to register the state she was in. "Theory," she started, her voice low and wary, at least at first. One wrong move and she feared Theory might flee. "Are you.. alright?" It was all she could think to ask, at least right now. What had happened to her? Why was she here? There were too many questions to ask all at once, so she'd start with this one, brows furrowed tightly as she took another slow step closer.

Struggling as she was to get through the thorns, she didn't hear the approach of the stranger. And that's what all it was - just another stranger. Everyone she passed lately was a dark, empty patch of memory. Occasionally she'd catch the glint of sunshine in someone's eyes and be stunned by recognition, but the guilt that followed was so overwhelming that she often avoided their gaze all together and simply moved on. When she tried to recall where she was going, what she was doing, who was this being that piloted her body... she came up empty. Thoughtless and aimless, like a small bit of dandelion fluff brought along by a breeze. Who knew where she was going? Did it even matter? And then the stranger was upon her, calling her name. She had held that little bit close enough, if only because it was repeated so often in the beginning - Hello, Theory? Theory, are you listening to me? Theo? A shiver wracked her body so thoroughly that she convulsed. Her toes curled into the dirt at the sound of this stranger's voice. Some residual shred of her begged her to turn, to look, but she planted her paws and kept staring listlessly ahead. If she turned around she'd have to confront this stranger, confront that she was maybe a little lost, confront that she'd forgotten most of the parts of her that made up her very soul. That she was just an empty body. Theory pulled back her lips in a cross between a grimace and a retch. A strangled noise came from her throat, as if she was going to vomit. She busily swallowed it back and instead of turning to address the stranger, the yawning dark pit inside of her, Theo stared straight ahead at the wall of thorns and sat down with a sudden thump. If this stranger knew her name, surely they knew other important things - she would not run from that - but try as she might, she just couldn't bring herself to turn and look. It was too much. "speech"

Thalia's brow furrowed tightly, like a string pulled taut and ready to snap at even the slightest bit of added pressure. This level of emotional turmoil wasn't something she'd felt in quite some time; she'd pulled herself purposefully away from anything that had the possibility to agitate her ever since she'd left Abaven so long ago. And suddenly the tumultuous storm of feelings returned to her all at once, confusing and frustrating and everything in between. Something was wrong, terribly wrong with her, but it was hard to tell exactly what it was. The scent of blood only grew stronger as she took a few steps closer. The sound that left Theory's throat was even more concerning, though as she inched closer she felt so many of those raging emotions grow quiet, replaced instead with worry. She was unwell, regardless of whatever had come between them, and it was impossible for Thalia not to wonder what had happened and to want to help. She wasn't the nurturing type, nor the type to go out of her way to help those in need unless they were her kin or it otherwise benefitted her in some way - but this was Theory. Complicated, beautiful, infuriating Theory. The very wolf that had let unintentionally led her astray and cast her out of her life without a second thought. "Theory," she spoke her name again, her voice still just as hesitant. There was a warmth there not usually heard from the Abraxas, try as she might to hide it. When she sat down Thalia dared to close the distance between them, lightly pressing her nose into Theory's flank. The contact was as much for herself as for Theory's benefit. "What happened to you?"