It was the exact thing she was afraid of. Now more than ever she was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Why couldn't they just trust her and even then she needed loyal friends. Not ones who would over look her mistakes and take her on a run for her life. It was a huge reason why she had placed herself in such a position. Placed herself to where she COULDN'T escape. Escape this deadly world, and all its poisons. She was a devilish thing wasn't she? She was going to die alone, but she still had left behind a progeny. Hopefully they would live a better more fulfilled life than she even if it meant killing their enemies behind that. Her throat tightened and she paced back and forth in the snow. She was looking for Avalon, her heart racing against her chest. How could she apologize, how could she make the woman understand. Avalon was a wolf she needed by her side, dearly so. Almost like Cypress, she needed cypress so she could raise her children to know how to defend themselves against the monsters in this world. With ghosts tip toeing across her head, she didn't know what else to do. Arian would let out the most agonizing groan she could. Before she started to pray to the gods. "Denki wa, watashi wa, watashi wa sore o motte iru ika no watashi wa shippai shi, watashi no kodomo-tachi o shukufuku suru koto ga dekinai kyōdo o fuyo shi, ima anata no shidō o onegaishimasu.(Denki I ask your guidance now, grant me strength where I cannot have it or less bless my children where I fail.)" she screamed out loud. Fighting the tears that cornered her eyes. She needed to trust Sin, what else could she do, no one else would vote to attack Yfir. No one else would even think about it. She needed them gone, no they all did. Arian pressed her head into the snow, shaking it back and forth in the summer snow. It sucked, on her birth day, she was losing everything she had gained sight of all over again. Was it fate as it was. She whimpered, crystal eyes still searching for her friend and god mother of her children. "Talk"

She had gone off into the depths of her cabin. Lying beneath the cot as opposed to on top, not wanting anyone to bother her or even talk to her. She was upset, clearly, as were everybody else she was sure. She couldn't have been the only one angry about what was going on, and as far as she knew, everyone was left in the dark. She thought she could trust Arian, thought that they were friends or something more. She was the God mother of her kids for heavens sake! Why was she being kept in the dark? With a disgruntled sigh, she slid out from beneath her hiding space and stalked out, ears flattened and her movements stiff, a clear sign to be left alone to whomever saw her leaving the ship. She didn't know what to do anymore, let alone who to trust. As she left the Antiox and crossed over into the packs other territory, her mind had been left blank. Her heart was heavy, broken, cold. Her mind unsure about what to think, all she knew was that she didn't trust this new character. Then again, she didn't trust anyone. Arian had been the first one she trusted in years, and even that felt shaky. To make matters worse, she knew who this Sin was...or rather, the family lines he belonged to. That same stare reminded her of the Albino that had waged war against her father's allied pack. Valhalla. Avalon couldn't understand Arian's motive for making such a bold move, especially since it was this mans father that had killed her uncle, or so she had heard. Her family after all, had been really close friends with the Adravendi's, and she'd been told stories by her sister and the former Valhallan wolves. Shaking her head, she then heard a loud scream come from somewhere nearby. It startled her, and she wondered if someone was in trouble. As she quickened her pace, she would soon find Arian burying herself in the snow, and instantly Avalon's demeanor would return to an emotionless gaze to match her voice. "What are you doing?" "Talk" "You" Think

The way that Avalon said those words might as well sent her insane. Arian felt her body seize up, not knowing what to say what to do. She was trying to bury herself alive perhaps. She slumped down into the snow and started to cry covering her eyes with her paws. She was a child she was but a simple child and she wished she could've asked her mother for help in a situation like this. "I-I...I made a Mistake. T...the same mistake as before." her jaw would move her paws up and down but she didn't uncover her eyes. "I'm not strong, I'm devilish, impulsive, immoral, and greatly greatly stupid." her teeth clenched as her tail whipped back and forth through the snow. "Everything I have is slipping through my paws, because I believed if I didn't do this no one would want to touch Yfir." She raised her head staring at her paws. Of course Cypress would blindly follow her, but that was because he loved her. Gods know why. "I love you Avalon. It pains my heart so, I brought Sin with the promise of getting rid of Yfir. Katja is a woman to be feared, I honestly believe that pack needs to be driven from the north. I know I should've consulted you and Cypress first I know it. Plus wolves who are sent into battle and do not wish to fight is cruel." She looked at Avalon with her crystal eyes, blinking away most of the tears that had cornered them. "If it weren't for my children, for Cypress for you.... I probably would've let Sin remove my head from my shoulders." her gaze went blank for a moment as she pressed her head back into the snow. "I keep causing pain, out of my own impulse." Her tail stopped shivering in the soft summer snow. "Talk"

She listened quietly as Arian cried to her. The girl wasn't sure what to think about it, whether this was another game or whether she was actually telling the truth, well she wasn't too sure. She sighed, fighting the urge to roll her eyes at the melodramatic woman but, part of her just couldn't ignore her. Even though she was greatly upset by Arian's decisions, she wouldn't have been so upset if she had been consulted first. Unless...Arian didn't trust her to tell her anything. If that was the case...then maybe this trust thing was a one way stree. She hoped not. "We all make mistakes...but...I don't think it's the same as before." She looked down at her paws before looking at the crying woman again, her voice still held a bit of tensity, but it was starting to fade. She moved towards the Alphess to stand in front of her, the taller woman's shadow falling over her. "You know...I'm sure if you would have asked us, we would have considered it. You're not the only one who see's them as a threat...being so close to here. And with the way the pack has been lately, well...this...sudden new change was just a surprise." She nosed Arian's cheek, she somewhat understood what her thought process was, but if she had just asked her pack what they thought about this threat, Avalon was pretty sure they would have banded together to protect their home. She looked away then, her mind wrapping around what she was going to say next. "You don't trust your pack." She glanced back at Arian, a knowing gaze in her eyes. Sure, Arian trusted her and Cypress and Amachi. But...she didn't really trust. And without trusting the pack, how could the pack trust her? "When a leader doesn't trust his or her pack, how is the pack supposed to trust their leader?" She gazed questioningly at her, "And I doubt that man would have ripped your head from your shoulders...he looks like he's up to no good but, even he looks like he has some sort of morals. He has a family after all, he wouldn't want an angry Cypress going after him." Her ears flicked nervously about that topic, she wasn't sure what to think about this...Sin character, but despite his grand entrance into the pack, and despite her anger about it...he was right too. Sonticus were sitting on their asses and doing nothing, they needed to step it up. "I...think...that you made the right move..." She took a deep breath to clear up her thoughts, her gaze showing concern now. "We can't sit around and wait for them to come for us. You're right on that one...and as much as I hate to admit, you were right in the decision you made. Maybe...Sin and his family are what we need right now to retaliate before they do." "Talk" "You" Think

Arian tried to give out a sigh, when Avalon did this for her, where else could she set herself. What could She do for Avalon this time. Her lips quivered for a moment as she looked at Avalon shaking her head as she listened though the nuzzle made her sit up rather than laying there in the snow. Seeming just like another innocently dying wolf on the ground. Arian would take in a deep breath before letting it out. She had now spoken to both council members, they had approved of Sin but she still had a stickling thing in her throat. "I'm sorry Avalon, I'm always causing you trouble. For once I want to do something for you." she shook her head so that the tears would fly off of her face. Trying to steady her breathing as she looked at Avalon. Supposed she should fill her in. "I guess it's a bit late, but I'll fill you in like I did cypress. Basically.... I've been feeling.... restless. With this leg there's only so much I can do, I know that I can fight for myself, but against someone like Katja or Valentine of Imperium I wouldn't stand a chance. It'd be a losing fight no matter what I do. So.... I searched for some able bodied to take the pack. At first I debated you, but my mind got caught up in itself and then I ran into Sin. Sin is Vereux's brother." her tail flicked a little. "So it wasn't the first time I'd heard of him. I purposed that he take the pack, as long as I get a high rank still and get a grip in the pack. He's..... not the kindest of wolf and even I know he'd more than likely take slaves and I know you hate that kind of thing. So I debated that as well and now I'm thinking maybe he should leave but cypress and you already said now it might be a good idea." Arian puffed out her chest. "And.... if I go back on the deal, it might as well piss off Sin where we're all in trouble. I'm not going to lie he kind of scares me." Her crystal eyes locked on Avalon. "Do you think I should still go through with this plan, I'd make certain that you are not harmed Avalon even if you want to leave. I'm stuck here.... until my children are old enough to move. If I don't like the way Sin is doing things I could always go to Fiori or Abaven. But, I also, made everyone else shaky and annoyed just like I did with my last pack." Arian settled her eyes down. She needed a bit of guidance she wasn't quiet sure what else to do. Maybe thinking things through would better suite her. Rather than laying in the dark and not trusting her pack. She held all of them very dear. "Talk"

She watched as Arian composed herself, stepping back to give her some room. She shook her head a little as soon as Arian finished her first sentence, a small smile on her lips. "Don't. You've done enough. You've fixed a broken creature and gave her a home, that's more then what I could have wished for." And it was true, despite the frustrations that presented itself, it was part of growing up. And honestly, she was glad to have it. She never had the chance to be frustrated or angry about something within a pack, other then being enslaved. This was a good kind of frustration and anger, or so she put it that way. She sat then, as she listened to Arian's next words. She mulled over what was being said carefully, and in a way...she couldn't blame Arian for doing what she did. "I see now why...you did what you did." She looked thoughtfully at her paws, her anger fading completely now. She couldn't stay mad at Arian no matter how foolish she thought she was being. "Honestly...I probably would have done the same, were I in your position." She murmured, her gaze returning to Arian. "If you needed, or still need my help, you know I will help you. I know I have...my own issues to overcome, but being here has helped me in doing that. I want nothing more then to see our home thrive, and to see you happy. I'll follow you anywhere, and if you feel you've made a wrong decision, I'll be here to guide you." True, Avalon wasn't much older then Arian, but she would sure as hell be at her side and pass what knowledge she had to help her in any way she could. She took a deep breath as she thought about how to respond to Arian's doubting question. She was afraid of Sin? Was that how he reminded her of the uncle she had? Truth be told, Sin scared her too. And she would rather not have him around, but right now...maybe they needed him? "He doesn't seem like the nice type...but even he wouldn't do something without a rational reason, I think..." She looked at Arian eye to eye with concern, though she was afraid of Sin too...he didn't seem to be irrational type his lineage had presented. "Like you said, he's Vereux's brother right? If Vereux had been capable of change, I'm sure Sin has too in some form. Experience and life...tend to do that, and he doesn't seem to be as irrational as their father was...that was...a whole other level of...I'm not even sure what to call it." She shuddered at the thought that she wasn't too sure if this creature was like the albino, but if he was...she was sure he would have killed Arian in their first meeting or challenged her at some point during the pack meeting, which he didn't. Instead, he had taken the initiative to say things that could potentially get the pack to actually start doing something if they believed they would receive punishment for it. "I can't tell you what to do or how to think, but you should rely on your intuition. Cypress and I will give our input, but ultimately the decision is up to you. However, you can't learn and grow without mistakes. And simply giving up isn't an option. So...I think, you should keep Sonticus. And I think, he could make a good ally in the future should he choose it." "Talk"

As Avalon spoke Arian's expression would each in turn change. Some of them confused, others a bit surprised and thankful. Even as every word she took in, it was something that the president learned one by one. Even when she spoke to Xephyris about this. Arian needed the motivation, she needed loyal friends. However she needed to not take them for granted, someone so close to her could be stolen away in a matter of seconds. She had destroyed her and Vereux's relationship with only a set couple of words. It just showed how fragile life could be. Arian was falling for Sin's trap regardless, she believed she knew a lot of things. Yet when she got paranoid, it was when she tripped over herself. "I want you to tell me all your thoughts Avalon. What's on your mind, I want to know what your afraid of, what you love what you hate the most. I want.... to know you." Arian shuddered when she said it. It was probably the same connection she made with Cypress, however she was loyal to him. Never had she felt such a vibration in her bones about a man like him. Father of her children. Arian supposed in the past she had mistaken friendship for the feeling of love of a mate. "Making friends is hard, but you're one.... I'd like to keep." she said this softly her crystal eyes searching for Avalon's gaze. Finding her neck pointing upwards to the larger female. "Talk"