Torin knew he'd been putting it off for too long, he needed to talk to his sister before it was too late. And he did believe that was a possibility, his family seemed to be pulling apart at the seams and he was desperate to keep a hold on everyone he had left.

Which meant he needed to talk to Kairi, he wanted to assure her that he hadn't been trying to pick on her but was just trying to do what he thought was best for the pack if not best for his family; which was a hard line to walk.

In truth he had another hope with for talking with his only remaining blood sister... she had always been the closest to their father and he hoped she might be able to give him some insight into how to approach him.


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She was near the borders, though she wasn't doing anything of importance. She thought about patrolling the borders, but her father seemed to do it all day and even more so since the meeting. She knew why he did it, so she didn't feel like her walking around the borders would be useful. Instead, she was moping in the grass, hidden from any passersby. Her small enough frame helped to hide her from view, and she thought about just staying here all day. At least until she saw someone coming, and that someone was her brother. Er... alpha... she wasn't sure how to act around him anymore, so she jumped to her feet and pretended like she was patrolling instead of doing nothing. Only after a few moments of acting like she was doing something important did she turn around and watch him. Waiting till he approached her. However, instead of her usual tail wag that always accompanied her greetings, she instead looked down. "Hi Torin.." She peered up at him, one ear nervously flicking back. Was she in trouble again? "Speak"

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As Kairi turned to look at him all the hope (and how little he had) fled him. His normally exuberant sister was visibly subdued looking uncertain and avoiding his gaze. Torin felt his stomach wrench painfully. He'd done this, he was the reason his whole family was falling apart. "Kairi..." He returned her greeting, his normally even tone clearly wavering, fraying with the weight of his guilt.

"Please... Forgive me." He felt heavy, unable to move any closer to his sister; despite wanting nothing more than to wrap her up in his embrace and hold on so very very tight. "I've fucked everything up." He hadn't meant to say it, but there it was tumbling out of his mouth as he felt like the flood gates were opening. "I've fucked up everything trying to keep everything together and I've hurt you and I hurt dad and... fuck..."


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She felt sort of bad for the way her brother looked, but what could she really do? She was hurt, and she felt like he was hurt in some way too, but for what reasons she didn't know. She didn't really want to say why she felt hurt, but she was never really good at hiding her feelings. "Please... Forgive me." Her gaze slowly drifted up to look at his face, noticing the way his features seemed almost twisted into something she'd never seen on him before. "I've fucked everything up." One ear twitched when she heard those words come out of his mouth, and it sounded strange hearing the word fuck come out of someone else's mouth that wasn't her father. Maybe things really were that bad for her brother to say things like that? She kept her mouth shut, not yet sure what to say until after he finished speaking. It took her a few long moments as she thought, and the more she kept glancing in his direction, the more she felt her own heart hurt. She hated feeling like there was a wedge being driven between her family. First their mother had gone, and then Rory, and then Jaidah...Breasal was scarce enough as it was, so all she really had left was her father and Torin. But even they felt like they had been getting distant with all that had been going on. She couldn't stand it anymore! She didn't want to feel like she was losing the family she loved so much. She always looked up to her father and Rory and even Torin before he--no..she couldn't stay mad at him for demoting her could she? While she didn't like the idea, maybe he had his reasons for it...she never asked why, simply just avoided him for her own reasons. Although she still felt hurt, she couldn't help herself. She quietly moved towards her brother and pressed her face into his chest, curling her smaller body up against her taller brother's chest and practically sitting between his forelegs. "I forgive you Tor..." She wasn't really sure if saying it would do anything, but maybe he needed to hear it, and she hoped her action would emphasize that she truly did forgive him and that she was sorry for not realizing how he might have been feeling sooner. Walk, "Talk" Think

He hadn't been able to keep his gaze on her, Torin felt like he was sagging into himself managing to stay upright through sheer muscle memory alone.

It felt like a life time before he felt his sister pushing into his form and this time he did collapse, falling onto his haunches and tucking himself around his sister.

"I love you Kairi..." He mumbled into her neck fur. He wanted to never let her go, he wanted to hold onto her so tight he'd never have to feel he was losing her again.

"I don't know how to fix this." He admitted. "It feels like whatever I try to do things just get worse, if I put the pack first I lose my family, if I try to put my family first the pack suffers."

He buried his face further into her fur, muffling his next words, they weren't necessarily meant to be heard anyways. "I'm sure Mom or Rory wouldn't have messed things up like this."


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"I love you Kairi..." She tilted her head up as her brother seemed to cave in around her, and she gently licked the underside of his muzzle. "I love you too, Tor. I always have and I always will," She listened quietly to the rest of what he said, and her own ears fell back a little as she thought. She knew her brother had a whole bunch of responsibilities since he became alpha, just like mom and Rory did. Although she didn't have leadership experience, she knew being an alpha wasn't easy. "You're doing the best you can, and you're good at being an alpha...maybe you just need to let your family help you, y'know?" She glanced at her paws for a moment before mumbling, "I know I haven't done much around here, I've been so busy exploring and trying to find my own purpose...and since half our family disappeared, you and dad are all that's really left. And I hate that we're not all getting along...even dad seems to be pretty angry and I've never seen him like this...I know it's partly because mom left, and then him feeling like you're favoring Jewell...and not being allowed around her pups even though they need proper training...he hurts too, Tor..." Even though she's not related to us... She didn't dare tack on that last part because she figured he'd get mad if she actually said it, so she kept it to herself. After a few moments, she pulled away so she could get a better look at him. The way he seemed so vulnerable was new to her. He always seemed so stoic and stuff, much like dad. But not now. "I can see everything that's wrong...I'm sorry I haven't been much help, but I'm trying. I know as an alpha you have to put your foot down sometimes, and I understand that. But maybe you need to talk to dad...did you know that we're his only family? Before mom, and before us...he lost all of his in a rockslide..." She recalled the story her father had told one day when she asked if he had any brothers or sisters, and where his mom and dad were. She still remembered the pain she saw in his eyes after telling her, and the way he seemed to close up. The invisible walls that he had tried to let down seemed almost visible when they went back up that day...was Torin the same way? In a sense, she felt like her brother and her father were more alike then they knew. Walk, "Talk" Think

Kairi leaned into him, giving him gentle reassurance, calming affection. She spoke softly and Torin couldn't help the dry rasping laugh that pulled from his lungs. Of course he had thought of leaning on his family, it wasn't as if he had never considered it but as his siblings and mother had drifted away and what little family he had left had decided to divide, both equally demanding their loyalty to him he hadn't wanted to put any more pressure on them. Still he listened as his sister spoke, feeling in equal measure sadness and resentment and a deep desire to protect his sister and make things right again.

He shifted slightly as Kairi pulled away, not feeling strong enough yet to meet her eyes but not wanting to seem like he was ignoring her he tilted his head towards her but kept his gaze low. He hadn't known that about Zell, but then how could he, when his father hardly seemed to speak to him. He sighed. "I didn't know that." He admitted, his feelings of guilt becoming even stronger, still he couldn't help the slight resentment.

"I- I want to make things right between us, I hate knowing that I hurt him but I don't know how to... and-" He sighed, lifting his head to look at her for the first time. "I hate feeling like I'm being made to choose between my family. I know dad doesn't see her that way but Jewell is my sister and I care for her just as much as I do you or Jaidah or... or dad." He sighed, he had always figured this conversation would have found him getting heated, he'd been harboring that anger and resentment for month, but instead he just felt defeated.

He shook his head, as far as he was concerned this wasn't an issue for his sister, this was something he and his father would have to work out."Kairi, if you're ever unsure about your place here please know you can come talk to me. I'd love to work with you on this." He managed to summon a bit more confidence in his voice, though it was still soft and his stature still spoke of his uncertainty. "And I... will make an effort to not try to carry the whole weight of the world on my shoulders."


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