And I Watch My Guiding Star As It Plunges to the Dark
08-22-2020, 01:10 PM
Drunk and driven by a devil's hunger...
Fury burned cold in his heart as he stalked back to his den site. How could Pesto say such things? To imply that Costanza wasn't Costanza was just ridiculous. Though if he were honest he felt some anger toward Costanza as well. She'd been avoiding him. She'd grown distant, even after the raid when his wounds needed tending to… but he supposed, most of all, he was angry with himself. That anger was lodged deep inside, dark and simmering. It sat hot in his gut like a fire-breathing dragon. He settled outside his den beneath a large oak tree. Costanza roosted a few branches up. She stirred lightly at his presence and seeing that he was upset she flew down. "What is the matter love?"
At first he didn't say anything, he simply looked away. He eyed the ground for a moment, brow furrowed before he looked up at the owl with a sigh. "I had a fight with my niece… Costanza… do you remember when we were first married?"
"Of course, my love."
"Do you remember how the moon was full when we returned to our marriage bed and we could see all the stars, not a cloud in the sky."
The owl cooled. "Oh yes my love, it was wonderful!"
Hari's mouth hardened into a stiff line, eyes narrowing for just a moment before he looked up at Costanza with a wide grin on his face. "Would you fly down here and just sit with me awhile?" The owl agreed and fluttered down next to him, leaning her feathered form against his side. "And, do you remember what we had to eat? The largest fresh salmon either of us had ever seen!"
The owl nodded eagerly. "Yes, I can taste it even now. One of the finest meals I've ever had."
Tears started to form at Hari's eyes as his smile shivered from something pleasant into something cruel. "That's funny you remember it that way… because the way I remember it it started raining not shortly after the wedding feast of elk. One of the last rains we had before the great drought."
The owl stiffened and tried to fly but Harbringr caught her right wing in his jaws and flung her back to earth. In a moment he had her pinned, a paw on either wing. "WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU!" he screamed through running tears. This wasn't Costanza. This wasn't Costanza and it cut him know that. He'd been blissfully following the lie like a fool for over a year. He was embarrassed, he was furious but most of all he was anguished. There was no Costanza in this world, he truly was alone.
Fear shown in the owls wide eyes. "Gi-Ginna!" she croaked. Harbringr choked back a sob. His jaws lunged toward the birds throat, seizing around it but only enough to get a hold. Try as he might he just couldn't kill the bird. Some part of him still saw Costanza in the bird's form. Instead he took the owl in his jaws and threw her again. "Get out of my sight, bitch!" The owl scrambled and limped before taking off awkwardly into the sky and leaving him to alone as the sun disappeared behind the horizon leaving only a thin red line of light.
His mind was in a mad flurry of thoughts, running through memories of his beloved, of their life before the great drought. It flooded back through him in a tidal wave he was helpless to stop until it came to the point where they both lay dying.
The famine had destroyed everything.
They had gone on one last search for food and found nothing. He remembered laying there in a barren land, under a darkening sky as the sun vanished to leave only a deep red line on the horizon, like a cut in the belly of the sky. They were skin and bones. They could see no future but suffering and death and so Harbringr sought to do the one thing he could for her. He sought to spare Costanza the suffering, and starve to death himself.
He killed her.
Harbringr sobbed and chocked out whimpering apologies as he fell to his stomach, his paws over his eyes.
He had laid down in misery as the last light faded and he was left surrounded by darkness. No stars, no moon, a clouded sky that didn't even offer a flicker of lightning. He expected to be dead by morning. However, when morning arrived so did help. He was rescued by a band of desert nomads, but it was too late for Costanza…
He really was a fool and this proved it! He was a monster and a murderer! Shame flooded him. He should tell Deathbelle and be executed properly. The whirlwind of thoughts turned into a whirlwind of emotions and he raced away as fast as he could. The destination didn't matter as long as it was away, far away. And part of him hoped that this time dawn wouldn't come.