Purple, orange,  pink and blue. All tinged with flares of golf. It had been a particularly lovely sunset if you were into that sort of thing. The scared woman,  ugly by some standards, felt nothing for pretty things. They were useless. A pretty sunset couldn't feed you. A field of flowers couldn't fight beside you. They were wind.

After a long day of patrolling the borders and saving the Warlords life, the big woman had stopped for a much needed rest.  She sank to her belly in the sun warmed grass and rested her bad leg. It was due to her break that she happened to notice the sunset. Really,  she just wished it would get over with. She much preferred a moonlit night over the glaring brightness of day.

With her den filled with both Meadow and Tamsyn,  she felt the need for these breaks. It wasn't that she didn't love them,  Resin was just one of those wolves that treasured solitude. The quiet times like this were calming and much needed. Especially with all of the thoughts running through her mind lately. There were some big decisions ahead and the time to choose was fast approaching.

The past few hours had been a jumble of energy, pain, and suffering. She'd nearly had Sirius' flesh in her teeth when he'd fallen from the bridge. She was so close to relief, to the catharsis that always seemed to come after they'd spilled each other's blood. Then the idiot had broken through the wood into the water below and Zee couldn't help but think it was a very coincidental way to excuse him from her rage. Of course she had worried for him in the moment, though Resin was a swift rescuer and the dire situation had passed as quickly as it came on. Her healers assured Zee he only needed rest and rest she allowed him, tearing from the den to stomp towards Deathbelle's empire.

While she called and called the Empress did not show her face. The frustration leaked into Zee's howl and demanded her presence but still Deathbelle remained absent. From there as well Zee was forced to turn away and as the sun began to set she found herself back in the plains. Her bird she'd already sent to find the Klein bitch, armed with a story of how the warlord had come so close to death. If she was still in Ashen's territories, Zee knew the worry would drive Deathbelle to him. It was then that she intended to intercept and then challenge the Empress. The sooner it got done the better, if Sirus woke before her challenge could be completed then he might not let her leave if she was to lose.

She'd found a half-way point between the shrine and their den, the path that Deathbelle would most likely take on her way to visit Sirius' sick bed. Her lips pulled into a frown as she recognized the hulking form already present there, disappointed that this time waiting could not be spent in solitude. "Resin." Typically her greetings went hand in hand with a smile, though it was too much for Zee to even attempt. "Io says he'll be fine." It was the most she was willing to offer, knowledge that her son-in-law was alive and would remain that way. For now, at least.

Zee moved to sit beside the older woman, her shoulders heaving in a sigh and her gaze firmly upon the distant border of the Shrine.

Soon her solitude ended as Zee approached and seated herself. The small woman simply said her name before letting her know that Sirius would be fine. Io had seen to him. The big woman merely nodded and continued to look towards the ever darkening sky. There was some underlying problem here. She could tell simply by the fact that Zee wasn't with her injured mate. It wasn't her place to question and dig, so she didn't. Instead, the woman simply pushed the skin of mead towards the antlered woman. Maybe that would help her relax.

Resin rarely drank and when she did, she never went overboard. There was always the chance of some danger or some emergency that she had to be ready for. There were some times where she just felt like she needed to take the edge off though and today was one of them. With the choices at hand, the pain in her leg and the stress of the evening, she'd finally tapped into the gift that Iolaire had made her. It was only after a few sips that Zee had arrived. The mead was strong and aged. The taste was a little bitter, but there were notes of sweetness, honey and herbs after. It was a pleasant brew.

After a time, the one-eyed woman cast a sidelong glance at the smaller of the pair. "Do you need to talk about it?" It was a kind offer. Generally, she didn't care about the problems of others to such an extent, but the little alpha seemed much different than usual. Something was definitely bothering her.

The queen gave a shrug of her small shoulders in response, her teeth digging into the inside of her cheek as she waited and watched the border. Trust caused pain, she knew that now. Even before the betrayal she'd found her circle of friends to be very, very small. Her husband, her sister, Tamsyn, Odette. The others were family, though not someone she'd share secrets or pain with. Even her handmaiden took seasons to build her trust, and as soon as Zee had admitted her problem and her need for help, she had vanished.

Her ears fell flat and she cast a glance sideline to the warrior woman before returning it to the distant trees. "What happened to Io's father?" She asked quietly. Had their relationship ended in death, betrayal, or something else? Zee was not convinced she was ready to put her heart into another wolf's paws, but knew she'd be grateful for the distraction. To busy her paws she pulled the drink closer, taking a cautious sip of it's warmth before passing it back between them.

The question posed wasn't one that she expected when she asked if Zee wished to talk. From the question she deduced that the issue was with her own relationship. Whether it would help or not, she would answer. "I killed him." Taking up the skin after Zee had had a pull, the big woman took one herself. "I loved him. He lost his mind. He left children in me by force then killed my three sons with the belief that they were fathered by a demon that was inhabiting him." The memories brought a numbness to her now. Once upon a time, they had roused unbridled rage and fury within her, but with him gone, there was none of that now.

"He tried to kill me as well and he almost succeeded, but I was the victor and Ioliare is safe." She didn't regret killing him. She only regretted that she'd given so much of herself to a madman. The scarred woman was never the same after that.

Again she cast a sidelong glance at Zee. "Thinking about killing Sirius?" It was partially a joke and partially serious. She knew that Sirius was nothing like Iolaire's father. He didn't deserve to die, but maybe he'd done something to at least make him deserving of some sort of retribution.

The answer was absolutely not what Zee expected, and the surprise of it was enough to draw her attention away from the trees. "What?" For a fleeting moment she forgot about the betrayal, consumed only by the story her mother-in-law told. When she'd finished speaking, Zee found herself speechless. She remained in silence for many moments, took another drink of the mead, and then huffed an exhausted exhale. The breath was long and drawn out, and ended with a spontaneous bout of laughter. "Well shit, way to make my problems seem small." For all his faults, Sirius was not a rapist, murderer, or lunatic. His only vice was his capacity to love.

Her shoulders shrugged again in answer to her question, though a smile touched at her lips. "Maybe." She admitted non-commitally. "Really it's not Sirius I'm angry at. It's Death. She kissed him, and I suppose he let her." Her brows furrowed, the anger returning as she felt the Empress' name upon her tongue. "It's.. complicated."

Ears flicked forward as Zee explained a bit of what was going on. It was complicated? "It doesn't sound complicated at all. She's encroaching on your territory. He let her. They both deserve punishment." Boundaries were a big deal. Especially in a relationship. Zee and Sirius were committed to one another. Nothing, not even an Empress, should be able to come between them. It was as good as written in stone to the ash and onyx woman.

Resin found that she was angry on Zee's behalf. Such blatant disrespect couldn't go unpunished. "Do you want me to fight her for you?" She'd offered it somewhat jokingly, but if the small woman accepted, Resin would do so. This rift between Zee and Sirius wasn't good for any of them, let alone the children that she'd become so fond of.

The warmth of the mead was spreading through the woman's big body. If she continued, she would soon be drunk. That wasn't her goal, but it was a possibility. Never in all of her days had she allowed another to come between her and her partner. Even when there were three of them in a relationship. It was a sacred bond that could not be broken without blood and retribution.

It was difficult to discuss, harder still to explain to a woman who had not been involved in the complexities of their relationship. She found herself wanting to defend Sirius - but only him, for Deathbelle had indeed stepped over the line. "No, like I said. It's complicated." Repeating it didn't help, and she dug her toes into the dirt like fists she could clench. "I understand loyalty, it's all I've ever known too. Death - she gave me the world. My husband. My children. If she commanded it of me, I would not be with him now. There are some things more precious then love." Her frown deepened, and she pulled the hide from Resin's paws carefully to sip once more. It felt good, and right. "But she didn't!" Her voice had grown harder, louder, against her will. "She gave us her blessing. She let me feel like he was mine, and now she's come to take him away."

When Resin offered her own teeth against the Empress, Zee's head slowly shook. "You can't, and I can't either because - " She stood, hackles raised and body pointed aggressively towards the border. To Deathbelle's empire she shouted. "THE COWARDLY BITCH WON'T SHOW UP." Her teeth revealed themselves once more as she snarled, though her sudden movements caused the heat in her body to spread and her assertive posturing faded. In it's place remained instead pain and sadness. "I called for her, Resin. She did not answer that call. My toucan has been searching to tell her he needs her, but still she's gone. How am I to make this right when she won't face me?" To the older woman she looked, willing her for guidance.

No matter how many times Zee said that it was complicated, it was all laid out in black and white to Resin. It was obvious that the horned woman didn't want to hear it though. She said that Deathbelle gave her everything, but these things weren't hers to give. If Zee hadn't taken the initiative, she very well may not have ended up with Sirius. But now that they were together, all of that was in the past. It no longer mattered. Sirius was hers and if she wanted to keep him, she'd have to fight. Not only fight for him, but to fight him if necessary.

The woman's outburst brought one brow arching in amusement. The mead seemed to be getting to her. If Deathbelle wouldn't show herself, then Zee would simply have to wait. "Break from Ashen. If she cannot be loyal to you, then she doesn't deserve your loyalty in return. Whatever you believe she's given you, it has been given and it's done with. Your life is your own. Don't let her darken it."

Once more her head shook, feeling the same anger she had when Sirius suggested the same thing. To everyone else it seemed so simple, so black and white. She hated that she could not see it similarly. "I can't do that. Fuck, it's not like this is my pack anyways to command. Sirius won that right, he merely gifted me a place at his side. I've not earned shit. I've been given my crown, given my children, given my husband."

Zee scoffed at herself, and that scoff intensified into a humorless and pained laugh. "And now that I'm ready to fight for it all, my opponent is gone. I'll always be second in the Armada, second in his heart, second to our children." It had not escaped her notice how their preferences had grown, the way Az looked at her. The way Indy gravitated to Io and Asla stargazed with Sirius. Mortis loved her, but Mortis loved everyone. "I'm sorry, I haven't come here to ask for pity." She attempted a small smile, though it wasn't able to touch her eyes. Instead of forcing it to remain, Zee dipped her head towards the hide that was slowly growing emptier. "Is there more mead?"

The woman wrinkled her nose as Zee spoke of being given everything that she had. Did the woman have no self worth? She spoke like a slave, and while she may have been one once, she was a slave no longer. It was time that she stopped acting like one. "No matter whether they were given or not, they're yours now. Even this pack is yours. If it was just Sirius alone, I can tell you that it would have taken an entirely different path. Whether you see it or not, your influence is clearly here." No doubt the Armada would have been filled with slaves, which was funny, considering Sirius had been one as well. Slavery wasn't something that she agreed with. Nor was it something that she would have been able to push aside to join the pack.

"If she's gone, then hopefully she stays gone. If she returns, you can deal with her then. Until then, simply take things one day at a time." Zee would need to prioritize. What was important to her? What did she want to keep? What did she want to let go? What was best for her and her children?

Zee apologized and asked for more mead. Resin pushed it towards her and curled her paws against her chest much like a resting cat. "You don't need to apologize. I'm here to listen, and I assure you, I'm on your side in this." She would have handled things differently, but then Resin was a different kind of wolf. Zee could only work with the confidence that she had, and at present, it seemed like there was very little confidence there. It was unfortunate. Resin rather liked her.