Tamsyn had been on the warpath ever since Ulric had returned from being summoned to the north with a little extra baggage. The Aegis had brought home another wolf, one that Tam knew from her past, and whose presence here infuriated her. He had never seen his little blackbird so enraged before, but when she started ranting about Sirius and his cavalier attitudes and habits, Kane immediately switched from confused to defensive. He was afraid Tamsyn would try to run off after the asshole again, getting drawn back into his web the way he seemed to have a habit of doing. Sirius Fatalis was toxic and the relationship he had with Tamsyn was borderline abusive, and he refused to allow a wolf like that near someone he loved. As much as he trusted Tam to keep her word that she wouldn't go seeking him out again, it worried him to think she could be on the edge of doing just that in her fit of anger. That was why as soon as the wine came out and Tamsyn's ravings became more drunken and delirious, Kane began doing all he could to calm his girlfriend down and keep her in check.

It took all of his focus and effort to plead Tam to stay and just vent it all out. Most of the night had been spent watching her pace back and forth in their bedroom while she alternated between cursing under her breath and all but screaming threats of violence against this wolf he'd never met. Finally, it took Kane practically shoving his tongue down her throat to get Tam to turn the fire burning in her heart from hate to lust and get her to think of something other than Sirius. He didn't recall how many times they'd gone at each other that night, the drunk angry sex leaving him well spent and exhausted by the end, and somewhere just before midnight, Kane fell asleep with Tamsyn at his side. He hadn't been aware of Tamsyn leaving to go send a message, but he did feel when the mattress shifted as she climbed back into bed and snuggled up in his arms. A sleepy smile spread across his muzzle, and Kane drifted back off into a deep sleep with his lover held to his chest.

Kane was awoken sometime in the middle of the night by voices whispering nowhere near as quietly as they thought they were right next to him. Hazel eyes slowly blinked open and scanned the darkness of the bedroom without moving his head. The practiced hunter knew well the methods of remaining undetected, and he lay still, measuring his breathing to make it look like he was still asleep while he listened to Gwynevere's raven telling a still very drunk Tamsyn that she'd delivered her message and Sirius was on his way here right now. Kane's paws gripped at the mattress as a tensing anger grew in his heart. Sirius was coming here in the middle of the night for Tamsyn?! He was usually a calm and peaceful wolf with calm and peaceful intentions, but right now he wanted to rip the fucker's head from his body if he dared show his face around here. But that was fine, because Tamsyn had given her word that she wouldn't see him again, and... wait, why was she getting up?

The dire brute continued his facade of sleep while he felt Tamsyn rise from the bed, listening to her claws click frantically as she hurried from their bedroom and tried to sneak out, but the clicking of the latch betrayed her escape into the night. He listened as her paw steps rushed away down the corridor, and then he lifted his head, staring in the dark at the door his lover had left through. His mouth hung open in shock. She was going to see Sirius. After all this, after crying her heart out about how he'd hurt her, after swearing Sirius off, after promising him she wouldn't seek Sirius out, after saying she loved him... Tamsyn still went as soon as the Warlord called for her. His heart ached as he realized this would be the constant. Tamsyn would always go when he called for her, even if it meant leaving their bed in the middle of the night. Sirius still held control over her, and he was beginning to doubt if those ties could be cut.

For a moment, Kane debated storming off after her and dragging her drunk ass back to bed after giving Sirius a few choice words. While that might have felt sweet in the moment, he knew that would only cause more harm. And so Kane just lay back down, staring out the large windows at the dark night sky, and he waited. He waited for Tamsyn to come back so he could confront her. He waited... and he waited... and he waited... He watched the moon creep across the sky, approximating an hour to have passed before he finally heard the door click open and Tamsyn try to silently slip back inside. He didn't move, still just lying in bed while he listened to her paws move across the floor, then felt her climb back into bed with him. Kane was lying facing away from where she slept, staring blankly out the windows, knowing she wouldn't have the mental faculties to check if he was awake while still drunk. He waited until she had gotten back into bed and settled down before he spoke and let her know that he was awake. "Got your fix of poison?"

"Kaneonuskatew"

As his mate, Tamsyn may enter his threads not marked as Private.
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Tamsyn's head was pounding by the time she walked back into the castle and up the stairs to the corridor that would lead to the room she shared with Kane. She wished that she felt more satisfied than she did about finally getting to get all of those words off of her chest, but Sirius made everything so much more painful and complicated than it really needed to be and this was no different. Any buzz or tipsiness from the copious amounts of wine she had consumed was gone, leaving behind a headache and a clarity she didn't really have the energy to think about. She had wanted to just tell Sirius her thoughts, force him to stare his mistakes in the face, and then be done with him forever, but as the idiot man pointed out they would constantly be in contact through their children. Of course she understood that she could make herself scarce whenever he came to visit or request that Artorias take the grandchildren to visit him in the Armada rather than letting him come here, but she didn't want to be the reason for a rift or tension for her son. She sighed and dejectedly walked down the hall to their room, quietly opening the door and slipping inside as she silently hoped that she had managed to leave and come back without disturbing Kane. He had listened to enough of her ranting and raving for one night, he didn't deserve to deal with the mess she currently was too.

But as she got settled back into the furs and pillows on the bed once more she heard Kane's voice. Dread settled over her and her ears flicked back with a sigh, laying her head down on one of the pillows as she closed her eyes against the pain aching through her head with each heartbeat. Gods, how did she even explain herself? She had a feeling that nothing she said would really justify it to him, especially after all he had done to give her an outlet for her anger, but she supposed all she could do was tell him the truth. "I... I sent Eilwen to deliver a message to Sirius," she admitted shamefully, opening her eyes just enough to look at the back of his head that was silhouetted by the moonlight. "I was laying here after you went to sleep and I just couldn't stop thinking about how badly I wanted to tell him off for everything he had done so... I did. Via raven. I'd tell you the message I sent, but I'm not sure I could remember it all now... It was long and violent and full of curses though." She had no doubt that Eilwen had delivered it in its entirety or at the very least got the point across. She didn't think Sirius would have come here in the middle of the night otherwise.

She groaned softly and covered her face with her forelegs, shielding herself from the light. "I know I shouldn't have, I know... I wasn't thinking clearly... He got my message and stormed down here and I knew if I didn't go meet him he'd come up to the castle and make a whole scene out of it." She laid there for a little longer, knowing that wasn't a sufficient excuse when she had told him that she would stay away from Sirius entirely. She had broken her promise and that wasn't excusable, no matter how angry or drunk she had been. Tamsyn lifted one of her forelegs from her face, peeking over at him and gently resting a paw on the back of his broad shoulder. "I'm sorry, Kane... I wanted so badly to force him to see all of the pain he's put everyone else through that I wasn't thinking beyond that - especially not while I was drunk. I've been so afraid to face him for so long, but I had just had enough. I couldn't take it any more and no one else was going to hold him accountable." She let her paw fall away from his shoulder again after a moment, her ears pinned back against her head as she covered her eyes with her foreleg again, bracing herself for the inevitable anger or disappointment she was going to be met with.

Tamsyn Carpathius

He heard Tamsyn release a heavy sigh, though whether it was out o frustration, exhaustion, defeat, or something else entirely he couldn't be sure. She admitted to sending the raven to deliver a message to Sirius in the middle of the night. "I know." That was all he said. Short, simple, but effective in delivering enough emotional impact. He knew. Kane listened while Tamsyn explained what she had done while he had been sat asleep post-coitus, admittedly smirking a little when she described her message as "violent and full of curses" and feeling a little bit of pride that she was able to stand up for herself to the toxic prick—he just wished she'd done it long ago and not when he'd begged her not to. He heard Tamsyn groan and flicked an ear back, listening to the sound of discomfort with a frown on his lips. Disappointed and hurt or not, he wasn't a cold bastard, and he wouldn't ignore his lover when she was in pain. It sounded like the alcohol was wearing off, leaving behind the agonizing hangover in its wake. Tamsyn would be feeling rough for some time, but it was the price to pay for her overindulgence in wine.

Tam admitted that she knew she shouldn't have done what she did and that somehow made him feel worse. It would have been one thing for her to do it drunkenly and be so out of control that she didn't remember it at all. But Tamsyn did remember, so she had been cognizant enough to know she shouldn't have. He didn't say a word throughout her explanation, letting her run herself out while he simply absorbed and considered everything she was saying. Then he felt the soft touch of her paw on his shoulder. He didn't flinch or harden beneath her touch, but nor did he turn to look at her. He simply took it, impassive and unresponsive. She apologized, but it felt qualified. She wasn't sorry for what she'd done, she was sorry he got caught in the middle. She had done what she wanted to do. She'd yelled at Sirius and gotten her pent up emotions out. But she'd done it all against the only request he'd ever asked of her, and she'd tried to do it behind his back knowing that it was against what he'd asked for. That alone hurt, but knowing that she just kept running back to Sirius in some way, shape, or form was the noose around his neck.

Kane felt Tamsyn's paw fall away from his shoulder, and he breathed a tired sigh. "It was the one thing I asked of you, Tam. The only thing, and you couldn't do that. You had to reach out to him, you had to go when he called for you, you had to go sneaking around in the middle of the night behind my back because he was here..." Kane's lips pursed into a fine line, saber fangs tugging at his bottom lip while his muddied mind worked a mile a minute to try to sort out his thoughts and feelings. He stared off into space, no longer seeing the bed or the room or even the stars and moon beyond the windows. But he pointedly did not turn to face her. "Sirius has his claws so deep in you, I don't know if I can ever get you away from him. He's a toxin that you let slip into your blood so readily. It's like... like you're addicted to him. All it took were two words, 'he's here,' and you were gone for an hour in the middle of the night."

Kane's eyes narrowed as he sifted through his mind, trying to find the things he wanted to say. "He's got your life on a fishing line and he knows how to keep reeling you in whenever he wants, and you just keep going. I don't..." He swallowed hard, shaking his head mostly to himself. "I don't know if you're ever going to be able to stop. I think he's too much a part of you to get rid of." Kane hadn't intended to let the hurt in his heart slip into his words, but the way his voice quivered from the upset in his last sentence got away from him. Sirius was like a drug slowly draining the life from Tamsyn, and she was hopelessly addicted. How could he ever hope to contend with ingrained influence like that?

"Kaneonuskatew"

As his mate, Tamsyn may enter his threads not marked as Private.
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As much as she tried to prepare herself for the hurt that Kane was going to give her it still stung more deeply than she had been ready for. That disappointment in his words and the tiredness he so obviously felt at this painful, reoccurring part of her life hit her harder than anything else had. Despite the discomfort the light caused her, she still lifted her paw to peek at his back that was still pointedly facing her while he spoke, not missing a bit of the emotion and quiver to his voice that broke her heart. She didn't interrupt or interject the whole time he was speaking, just listening and trying to understand. Sometimes it was hard for her to see past her own hurt and anger to see the ripples it caused and she realized that in that way she wasn't much better than Sirius. That thought struck her and she was quiet for a moment as she contemplated that realization with a frown pulling at her tired face.

After a few long, thoughtful moments she shifted closer, pressing her face into his scruff, slipping her forelegs around his sides even though she couldn't reach all the way around him, reaching out to him and using his back to block the moonlight at the same time. "I'm sorry..." she said into his fur. No excuses, no qualifications, no reasons. She knew she had handled all of this so incredibly poorly and she knew he was right at least to some extent. She didn't like that her and Sirius' lives were so intertwined, but she couldn't figure out a way to untangle them now, especially not with Briar and Artorias so obviously in love. She couldn't ask her son to give up his girlfriend so they could cut the Fatalis family out of their lives, but she also couldn't abandon her son to at least remove herself from those wolves either. But that was a bigger problem for another time. For now her biggest worry was repairing the damage she had caused with her rash, drunken actions.

"You're right... I know you're right... I don't want you to be right... I don't want any of it..." She sighed, her paws curling around panfuls of his fur as she sighed, squeezing her eyes shut with her ears folded back. "I'm sorry, Kane... I know sorry doesn't really cut it, but... I really didn't mean to hurt you and if I could take it all back I would... Yelling in his face and all that wasn't worth hurting you or breaking my promise..."

Tamsyn Carpathius

Kane had wanted to remain upset at her for what she'd done. He didn't want to just forgive this breaking of her word so easily and give her the impression that things were fine. But when he felt Tamsyn shift closer until her body was pressing to his back and her forelegs tried to feebly wrap around his bulk, he couldn't help but feel his heart ache for her. Her face buried in his scruff muffled her words, but his ears still barely managed to catch her mumbled apology. He sucked in a deep breath, held it within his lungs for a few moments, then released it in a long sigh. He was tired of feeling like he couldn't compete with a wolf he hadn't even met before. He thought for sure that if Tamsyn was over him as much as she'd said she had been the last time during the summer, then staying away from Sirius would be an easy ask. Surely if she loved him, she'd pick him over Sirius. As it turned out, that hadn't been the case. She'd run off to see him, and whether it had been to yell at him or not didn't matter. What mattered was that he didn't trust Sirius around her, had asked her to do one thing to make him feel comfortable, and she broke his trust.

Tamsyn muttered about how he was right and that she wished he didn't have to be, that she didn't want any of this. He scoffed under his breath. Right... because that's why she sent him a message in the dead of night and ran out to see him wherever as soon as she heard he was coming. That thought made his stomach churn, and as much as he hated himself for suspecting anything, he had to know for sure. Kane rolled over after her apology, wrapping a strong foreleg around her side and back and holding Tamsyn tight to him while he pressed his nose gently to her forehead. He drank in her scent, sampling it and then moving his snout down the side of her neck, then her shoulder, each time breathing in her smell. She didn't smell of any other wolves, so she hadn't been cheating on him at the least. Before tonight, he never would have even suspected Tamsyn of such a thing. After tonight, catching her sneaking out in the middle of the night while drunk to find the brute she'd angry messaged at midnight, his suspicions of infidelity weren't exactly unfounded.

When he was satisfied that she hadn't done anything with Sirius, he breathed a relieved sigh and relaxed his foreleg around her, allowing her to slip away if she wished. He remained lying towards her now so she could bury her face in his chest if she wished. She looked exhausted and ill and just overall like she was having the worst night of her life. "How can I trust that you're sorry when I can't even trust you to stop seeing a toxic wolf who's hellbent on hurting you?" he asked, his voice never raising above a husky murmur. "How will I know you won't keep running off to him every time he comes by or calls for you? It's like he has some sort of possession over you, Tam, and you just... give in to him every time." Finally, he had to ask the question still lingering in his mind, something she had confessed to him that made his stomach to anxious flips. "Do you still love him?" Intense hazel eyes stared at her through the dark. "Answer me honestly, please."

"Kaneonuskatew"

As his mate, Tamsyn may enter his threads not marked as Private.
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Tamsyn felt Kane begin to shift and she released his sides and his fur as he rolled toward her, glancing up at his face with tired eyes before he wrapped her up in his embrace and held her tight. Relief mixed with the guilt as she leaned her head into his chest, but when he pressed his nose to the top of her head and she could feel and hear him breathing in her scent, she realized he was checking to see if Sirius' scent was on her and the guilt nearly made her sick to her stomach. She felt like it was one thing to make a stupid, drunken mistake, but the biggest consequence of all was damaging his trust in her enough to feel like he needed to make sure she hadn't cheated on him. Her ears fell back against her head and she closed her eyes with her face pressed to his chest, quietly letting him check her for as long as he needed to be reassured that nothing like that had happened. At this point she didn't know if her saying that she didn't cheat would even help the situation if he truly was feeling as if his trust had been broken so she simply waited until he was satisfied and felt him relax slightly.

She didn't move or lift her head from his chest though, hiding in the darkness of his fur as he spoke. His concerns were valid ones and she wasn't going to try and tell him that they weren't. She hated how much influence Sirius still held on her life and even though she knew she was through with him she knew it would be impossible to get Kane to believe that now after she had broken her promise just a couple of hours ago. She listened to his words with guilt and shame - wishing desperately that she could turn back time and stop herself from sending Eilwen to deliver her message and instead waiting till the morning when she could have more calmly talked through her options with Kane instead of risking his trust like this. There was no undoing it now though. Now she just had to face the consequences and do everything she could to prove to him that she was truly done with Sirius and all of the heartache that he had put her through... even though it was currently hard for her to even think straight.

When he questioned her about whether or not she still loved Sirius her head finally lifted from his chest, her exhausted gaze popping up to look at his in the pale moonlight. Her ears were still pulled back against her skull as she gave a shake of her head. "No. I don't love him," she replied, her voice still soft to keep herself from hurting her own ringing ears, but it was firmer and held more conviction than when she was speaking before. Her paws held on to the fur on his chest again, her gaze lingering on his. "I'm... I'm not sure I ever loved him. At the very least I never loved him the way I do you or even the way I did Resin..." She sighed and let her head fall back to his chest, curling into him as she closed her eyes once more. She wished there was a good way to explain the relationship she had with Sirius or some reason to put some kind of logic behind it, but there was none. Anyone approaching this situation logically would have stopped associating with Sirius long ago, but she hadn't. She had kept seeing the good in him far longer than she should have and now she was paying the price.

Tamsyn Carpathius

It broke Kane's heart to see the amount of pain and devastation in Tam's expression while he checked her. He didn't want to have to do this; he didn't want to feel like he couldn't trust her word. A relationship without a foundation of trust was a house of cards waiting to collapse on itself. That wasn't what he wanted with Tamsyn—it wasn't what he thought he'd had with her. He wanted to trust her, to believe the words she told him and to count on her respecting him and his wishes when he said her being around Sirius didn't make him comfortable or feel safe. She was silent all the while he checked her, only relaxing once he'd finished his inspection. He felt sick that he'd had to resort to that, but what the hell was he supposed to think when his girlfriend snuck out in the middle of the night for an hour to see the wolf he knew she'd been infatuated with? Now it was his turn to feel guilty when he didn't even find a whiff of another brute on her and realized she was telling him the truth when she said she didn't love him anymore, and never the way she did with him or Resin.

This time, when Tamsyn curled up into his body and hid herself away, Kane wrapped her up in his forelegs, holding her tight to his body while he enveloped her smaller form with his larger one. A large paw came up to stroke over the back of her head, trying to comfort her some. "I'm so sorry..." he whispered, speaking in reference to not trusting her to remain faithful and having to check her for foreign scents. "I love you so much, my blackbird. I should have known better. I... I don't trust him not to do anything to you though, and I just... had to be sure. I'm sorry..." Hazel eyes slid closed while he rubbed over the back of Tamsyn's head and down her neck and shoulders while he clung to her as if she might disappear into the night again. What was done was done. Trust would need to be rebuilt, and although he was hurt and upset, Kane was willing to put those emotions aside to love and care for his clearly hungover girlfriend.

"You look exhausted, my little blackbird," he commented, keeping her face buried in his chest to block out all light from her photosensitive eyes. With his lips grazing over the top of her forehead and ears, he pressed gentle kisses and little nibbles with careful sabers across her skin. "You should sleep... We can talk more in the morning if you want, but for now you need to rest." Kane continued to rub over Tam's back and shoulders, keeping her wrapped up in him like a blanket. He knew their discussion would yield no results now with emotions running raw and Tamsyn barely hanging on to consciousness. They both needed time to cool off, comprehend emotions and collect their thoughts, and in Tamsyn's case stop the room from spinning. "I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere," he whispered while nibbling the edge of a black-furred ear, hoping to reassure her that no matter what, he would be here when she woke up. He wasn't going to leave her.

"Kaneonuskatew"

As his mate, Tamsyn may enter his threads not marked as Private.
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