Making Moves
03-12-2022, 09:18 PM
Decisions had been made. Now that her mother had left the castle, Bowen had decided to move into the empty space so that she could be closer to the rest of her family. The floor was a little too crowded for the somewhat reclusive young woman, but she would make due. It had been her choice to remain in The Hallows alone, breaking the relationship between herself and Haiku. Staying in her former rooms was a little painful. She had hurt the man and it was something that she had to live with, but it would have hurt more if she hadn't been true to herself.
First, Bowen did a little spring cleaning of the empty space. She dusted, cleaned the floors, aired out the mattress on the bed and placed new furs upon it. The copper fae took it slow. There was no real rush. Bowen had meager belongings, so it wouldn't take long to transfer things between rooms. Despite the amount of time that she'd been back in The Hallows, she hadn't acquired much.
Bowen Arrow Carpathius
03-14-2022, 10:12 PM
With the turn of the season and warmer spring days upon the southern continent, the Hallows had been abustle with activity while the wolves prepared the castle for the more seasonable weather. Briar and Lia had set to cleaning and airing out the alphas' chambers, so Artorias meandered around the halls, observing his wolves busy at work cleaning their spaces from the winter or tending to the blooming gardens out in the courtyard. A small smile touched his lips while he peered out one of the open windows to the wolves in the gardens below pruning away dead growths and excess leaves. The Hallows had truly grown into a flourishing and expansive pack whose influence was undeniable. The Aegis was beyond proud of everyone for all the work they put into their home and themselves; they were the heart and soul of the pack.
And speaking of hearts and souls, Artorias' wandering paws brought him down the hall past the room he had first occupied, the one his mother and her mate had recently left. He'd offered it to Bowen to bring her closer to the family—and to give her a fresh change of scenery after the difficult decision she had made—and judging by the open door, the young woman was hard at work making it her own space. Stepping into the familiar room, Artorias rapped his paw against the wooden door to announce his presence before fully stepping in, amber eyes falling upon the caramel cream fae he adored so much. "How's the move-in going?" he asked with his usual crooked smile as he surveyed the room. A cool ocean breeze rippled in from the open window, the faint scent of sea salt carried in around Bowen's own natural scent in the room. "Anything I can lend you a paw with? I've been exiled from my room for an indefinite time."
"Bowen & Artorias"
And speaking of hearts and souls, Artorias' wandering paws brought him down the hall past the room he had first occupied, the one his mother and her mate had recently left. He'd offered it to Bowen to bring her closer to the family—and to give her a fresh change of scenery after the difficult decision she had made—and judging by the open door, the young woman was hard at work making it her own space. Stepping into the familiar room, Artorias rapped his paw against the wooden door to announce his presence before fully stepping in, amber eyes falling upon the caramel cream fae he adored so much. "How's the move-in going?" he asked with his usual crooked smile as he surveyed the room. A cool ocean breeze rippled in from the open window, the faint scent of sea salt carried in around Bowen's own natural scent in the room. "Anything I can lend you a paw with? I've been exiled from my room for an indefinite time."
03-22-2022, 08:34 PM
A voice from behind pulled Bowen's attention from her somber musing. The woman cast a viridian gaze over her shoulder, eyeing her big, blue brother. One copper ear flicked, the gold hoop swaying, taking the little blue feather along with it. "Honestly, there isn't much to move. I've learned to live light." She turned to him fully, crossing the room to reach up on tiptoe where she placed a little kiss on the side of his muzzle. The woman cast her gaze across the empty space. "This is about it. I just have to bring my glass orb and..." the fae gave a slight shrug. She didn't even have any favorite furs or anything. Belongings just weren't important.
"I assume your rooms are getting a thorough cleaning?" It seemed to be the theme of the day. With one of the first nice, warm days of spring, a lot of Hallows wolves had chosen to give their rooms a bit of a touch up. She doubted anyone would have things as easy as she did. Perhaps she'd offer to help others when she was finished.
Pushing past Artorias, she curled her tail around one thick, blue foreleg, prompting him to come along with her. Back down to her former room she went. It was empty aside from the glass orb. She'd already placed clean furs upon the bed for whoever took up this space next. A little frown tugged pink lips downward. It looked as though she and Haiku had never been here. Turning sad eyes up to her brother, Bowen sighed. "Do you think I did the right thing by sending him away?" It was fair for Haiku, but she was going to be terribly lonely.
Bowen Arrow Carpathius
03-22-2022, 09:22 PM
When Bowen turned to look at him the moment she heard his voice, Artorias saw the sobering melancholy haunting his beloved sister's mind. Even if she didn't show it outwardly, he could see it behind those beautiful green eyes. Moving into this room wasn't just a change of scenery; it was an entire lifestyle change for her, a new chapter, so to speak. His lips pursed together and he swallowed thickly, feeling his heart ache for her. He knew that ending her relationship with Haiku had been one of the most difficult things she'd had to do, and he didn't take that fact lightly. Bowen had made a choice—a choice to be with him and to be his. Artorias had in turn vowed to be everything he could be for her in every capacity he could. He would be a wolf worthy of her love and devotion. As Bowen crossed the room towards him, Art couldn't help but watch the gold hop and feather sway from her ear, but was gladly taken back by her sweet kiss to his cheek, which he happily returned to her lips with one of his own. The taste of her lingered there, just enough to make the dire brute hum with delight.
Artorias gazed around the sparse room he had once occupied while Bowen explained that she didn't have much to move. It was true, the Carpathian woman liked to live functionally rather than fashionably—a trait he could align with—and didn't have much in the way of personal possessions to take with her. "Well, maybe we can find some things to make it feel more like a reflection of you," he suggested. He knew Bowen wanted to take up the art of fighting. "We could go hunt some predators, maybe find some nice pelts for the bed. A white tiger, or a panther." She asked about his rooms and Artorias nodded with a sigh. "Briar and Lia have gone all-in on the spring cleaning, and I was deemed an obstacle." A low chuckle rumbled in his chest. He was fine with it; it just meant he got to spend more time with his Bowen.
When Bowen moved to slip past him, Artorias stepped aside to let her slide by, the curl of her tail against his foreleg doing as intended and drawing his attention and footsteps after her. Together, the sibling couple headed back up to her old room on the third floor. Artorias peered around the vacant space, cleaned and freshened up by Bowen already. As if it had never been used at all. Artorias knew differently, of course, and when he peered down at Bo, he saw the sad frown on her face as wistful eyes took in the space. He met her sad emerald eyes with soft embers of his own, the corner of his lips tightening as he considered her question. The Aegis drew in a deep breath, released in a slow sigh, then slipped his head beneath Bowen's midsection, followed by his neck and shoulders, easily hoisting her light, svelte body up over his back. A kick of a hind paw shut the door behind them to grant them some privacy while he carried his sister easily over to her former bed, sliding her gingerly off onto the mattress. Artorias then went and took Bowen's glass orb from the mantle, carrying it carefully over to place on the bed beside her before hopping up to join her.
"What does your heart tell you, Bo?" he asked, using his childhood nickname as a term of endearment while he wrapped his larger form easily around hers, as if shielding her, protecting her, keeping her entirely to himself for the time. Large bushy tail slowly curled its way over her rump to wrap around her long silken cream-furred tail, one large azure paw sliding the orb to nestle it between her paws while he cuddled her.
"Bowen & Artorias"
Artorias gazed around the sparse room he had once occupied while Bowen explained that she didn't have much to move. It was true, the Carpathian woman liked to live functionally rather than fashionably—a trait he could align with—and didn't have much in the way of personal possessions to take with her. "Well, maybe we can find some things to make it feel more like a reflection of you," he suggested. He knew Bowen wanted to take up the art of fighting. "We could go hunt some predators, maybe find some nice pelts for the bed. A white tiger, or a panther." She asked about his rooms and Artorias nodded with a sigh. "Briar and Lia have gone all-in on the spring cleaning, and I was deemed an obstacle." A low chuckle rumbled in his chest. He was fine with it; it just meant he got to spend more time with his Bowen.
When Bowen moved to slip past him, Artorias stepped aside to let her slide by, the curl of her tail against his foreleg doing as intended and drawing his attention and footsteps after her. Together, the sibling couple headed back up to her old room on the third floor. Artorias peered around the vacant space, cleaned and freshened up by Bowen already. As if it had never been used at all. Artorias knew differently, of course, and when he peered down at Bo, he saw the sad frown on her face as wistful eyes took in the space. He met her sad emerald eyes with soft embers of his own, the corner of his lips tightening as he considered her question. The Aegis drew in a deep breath, released in a slow sigh, then slipped his head beneath Bowen's midsection, followed by his neck and shoulders, easily hoisting her light, svelte body up over his back. A kick of a hind paw shut the door behind them to grant them some privacy while he carried his sister easily over to her former bed, sliding her gingerly off onto the mattress. Artorias then went and took Bowen's glass orb from the mantle, carrying it carefully over to place on the bed beside her before hopping up to join her.
"What does your heart tell you, Bo?" he asked, using his childhood nickname as a term of endearment while he wrapped his larger form easily around hers, as if shielding her, protecting her, keeping her entirely to himself for the time. Large bushy tail slowly curled its way over her rump to wrap around her long silken cream-furred tail, one large azure paw sliding the orb to nestle it between her paws while he cuddled her.
03-22-2022, 10:06 PM
(This post was last modified: 03-23-2022, 04:22 PM by Bowen. Edited 1 time in total.)
Artorias came along with her without much prompting and Bowen was sure to reward him with a little extra sway in her hips as she led the way to her old room. He suggested that maybe they hunt some things together. Acquire some furs that she might like to have. Bo gave a little shrug and leaned into Art's side for a moment. "I don't like the idea of killing for the sake of killing," she admitted. Hunting an animal just for its fur wasn't appealing to the woman. If they happened to see one for sale or a predator happened upon Hallowed land... then it would be different. "I don't really mind not having things, you know." The few things that she did have were given to her and held special meaning. Otherwise, things were just things.
Once inside the room, the melancholy took hold and it was obvious to her brother. Bowen released a little gasp of surprise as Artorias responded to her question by easily lifting her onto his back, then depositing her on the bed. Emerald eyes watched as he fetched the glass orb from the mantlepiece and brought it to place between her paws. Bowen looked down at the orb as Artorias curled his big body around her minuscule frame. Only her ears shifted as he questioned her and the woman sighed, leaning into the protective wall of black, blue and silver. "My heart isn't very reliable," she mumbled, still staring at the ball. Soft, pink pads held the orb, turning it this way and that in her grasp.
After taking some time to think about her own question, the caramel cream fae sighed once again, long and slow. "A part of me will always love Haiku," she began, her tones soft. "I would never be able to be what he needs or deserves." The young fae shook her head. "I don't think I'll ever be what anyone needs or deserves." From the moment that her sexual nature rose to the surface, Bowen had a difficult time understanding and coming to terms with it. Her mother's had been faithful to one another. That was how it was supposed to be, right? Two wolves, forging an unbreakable bond. It was something that Bowen had wanted, but it was also something that she was incapable of. Especially now.
With a groan of exasperation, Bowen curled the glass orb in the crook of one elbow, then unceremoniously mashed her face into the mattress. She didn't want to be such a downer, but Artorias was the only one that she spoke so openly with. She was a stranger in her own home and didn't mingle much with the others, even her own family. She was just... awkward and reclusive and really only lit up when Artorias was near. It wasn't right or fair to put such pressure on her brother, so she just accepted the times that they were together and was nothing but a phantom in between.
Bowen Arrow Carpathius
03-23-2022, 12:41 AM
(This post was last modified: 03-23-2022, 03:03 AM by Artorias. Edited 1 time in total.)
Artorias had always enjoyed every moment he got to spend with Bowen. From the sway of her hips she put on to tease him with to the way she leaned her lighter frame into his side, every second he spent with her made his heart feel lighter than air, hotter than fire, and skip beats like a stone on the water. Bowen didn't like killing for sport, and Artorias could respect that. If a predator happened upon Hallows land, then he'd made sure she got a fine pelt to keep them warm whenever they snuggled. The little cream and caramel woman repeated that she didn't mind not having things, and while he knew that was just a part of who she was, that didn't stop Artorias from wanting to give his love everything she deserved. It was more than just because she was a Carpathius, or because she was his sister. It was because he loved her and he wanted to give her nice things because she was worth them and much, much more to him. The Aegis was already surreptitiously working on ideas of what to give her. Little did she know, he already had made something for her...
While they cuddled together in the quiet of the empty room, Artorias frowned to hear Bowen dejectedly admit that she didn't believe her heart was reliable. She explained how a part of her would always love Haiku, and that she couldn't be what he, or anyone else, needed. Then she groaned and flopped face down into the mattress, coaxing a deep chuckle from the dark-furred brute. "Your heart is far more reliable than you think... It guided you back home to us..." He slowly slid a massive paw to take one of hers in his grasp, sliding it across the bed until he could trail a few gentle kisses across the back of her paw. Fire-blazoned eyes never left Bowen, even if she didn't lift her head to look back up at him yet. "...It led you back to me." Artorias lifted and draped a foreleg across Bowen's back, wrapping around her slender sides to keep her held close. He wished he knew some magic words to say to make everything better. But life wasn't a fairy tale like that. Life was messy and chaotic and unpredictable.
For a long moment, Artorias was quiet while he held Bowen, content to just stay with her here for all time. He alternated between kissing her paw to brushing his muzzle along the back and side of her neck, up behind an ear, and over her crown, showing her little affections while he tried to comfort her. "I know it hurts. Loving someone is the greatest and sweetest pain I’ve known. But just because you and Haiku weren’t a perfect match doesn’t mean you aren’t ever what someone needs," he said after a moment, his voice a low, husky murmur, speaking almost secretively to her as if the world would try to pry into their lives otherwise. His words were for her only. "I wish you could see yourself the way I see you. My Bowen... Kind, beautiful, smart, loving Bowen... " Artorias punctuated his gentle words with a slow, lingering kiss just behind her ear closest to him, whispering just for her with his lips brushing the delicate appendage. "You're everything I need. I just hope I'm worthy of you. I love you so much." Shifting his head, Artorias laid with his cheek against the mattress so he could continue to watch his sister, the young brute drinking her in with a wistful smile on his obsidian lips. "You wanna tell me what's on your mind?" Art might not have been able to do much in the moment for her, but if Bowen wanted to vent or purge the negative emotions plaguing her, he would listen and do whatever he could for her. That's what lovers did for one another. They supported each other, lifted each other up. That's what he'd seen their mothers do, at least, and it was what he wanted to be for her.
"Bowen & Artorias"
While they cuddled together in the quiet of the empty room, Artorias frowned to hear Bowen dejectedly admit that she didn't believe her heart was reliable. She explained how a part of her would always love Haiku, and that she couldn't be what he, or anyone else, needed. Then she groaned and flopped face down into the mattress, coaxing a deep chuckle from the dark-furred brute. "Your heart is far more reliable than you think... It guided you back home to us..." He slowly slid a massive paw to take one of hers in his grasp, sliding it across the bed until he could trail a few gentle kisses across the back of her paw. Fire-blazoned eyes never left Bowen, even if she didn't lift her head to look back up at him yet. "...It led you back to me." Artorias lifted and draped a foreleg across Bowen's back, wrapping around her slender sides to keep her held close. He wished he knew some magic words to say to make everything better. But life wasn't a fairy tale like that. Life was messy and chaotic and unpredictable.
For a long moment, Artorias was quiet while he held Bowen, content to just stay with her here for all time. He alternated between kissing her paw to brushing his muzzle along the back and side of her neck, up behind an ear, and over her crown, showing her little affections while he tried to comfort her. "I know it hurts. Loving someone is the greatest and sweetest pain I’ve known. But just because you and Haiku weren’t a perfect match doesn’t mean you aren’t ever what someone needs," he said after a moment, his voice a low, husky murmur, speaking almost secretively to her as if the world would try to pry into their lives otherwise. His words were for her only. "I wish you could see yourself the way I see you. My Bowen... Kind, beautiful, smart, loving Bowen... " Artorias punctuated his gentle words with a slow, lingering kiss just behind her ear closest to him, whispering just for her with his lips brushing the delicate appendage. "You're everything I need. I just hope I'm worthy of you. I love you so much." Shifting his head, Artorias laid with his cheek against the mattress so he could continue to watch his sister, the young brute drinking her in with a wistful smile on his obsidian lips. "You wanna tell me what's on your mind?" Art might not have been able to do much in the moment for her, but if Bowen wanted to vent or purge the negative emotions plaguing her, he would listen and do whatever he could for her. That's what lovers did for one another. They supported each other, lifted each other up. That's what he'd seen their mothers do, at least, and it was what he wanted to be for her.
03-23-2022, 05:37 PM
Bowen mumbled unintelligibly into the furs in response to Artorias' beliefs on the reliability of her heart. It had led her back to them, he said, then reiterated, saying that it led her back to him. The silken fae turned her head just enough to fix the blue brute with one emerald eye. Truer words, and all that. He was indeed the reason that she had returned. Yes, she held love for her siblings, her mother, but... she could live without them. Bowen couldn't live without Artorias. He had been her constant while she was away; her beacon in the dark. Perhaps she placed him upon a pedestal, but, in her eyes, that was where he belonged.
The man trailed kisses along one sable colored paw, drawing little mmph sounds from Bowen with each kiss. He then wrapped one muscular foreleg around her, drawing her in close before turning the attention of his lips to the backs of her crown, neck and ears. Tingles ran up Bowen's spine like little dancing fingers and a shudder ran through the fae's body, finally forcing her to raise her face from the furs. Artorias spoke words of wisdom and Bo's ears flicked backwards. He always said these nice things about her, but it was difficult to believe them when her own self-worth was so low. She would never call him a liar, however.
Artorias spoke tender words, delivered tender touches and caresses and Bowen was lulled into a state of calm for a short while. He complimented her and she accepted it, though she still couldn't see what he saw in her. When he mentioned that he hoped he was worthy, Bowen released a single, abrupt laugh. Her brow screwed up and she looked at him, head shaking. "You're a king, Artorias. The king of this entire place and of all its wolves. You're worthy of anyone." The woman inhaled deeply. "Perhaps that's why I feel so unworthy."
When asked if she wanted to share her thoughts with him, Bowen grimaced. She thought about it for a long moment, trying to formulate the words in her mind, but eventually stopped trying and just spoke. "You could have anyone that you wanted in your bed and, honestly, that scares me. Who's to say that you won't find someone better than me? Someone that will take up more of your time which will leave less for me." It was something that she thought about often. She dwelled on it a lot. She dwelled on many negative thoughts, but this was a big one. Bowen was just his crazy little sister. She had nothing to offer that would keep him by her side.
Shrugging off the man's embrace, Bowen slid down from the mattress and onto the stone floor, her long tail snaking off of the furs behind her. She needed a bit of distance between them so she could focus on her thoughts rather than on the hard, warmth of his body pressed against hers. "I don't mind sharing with Briar. I actually like her, you know?" A short, sardonic laugh left the woman and she shook her head. "But the thought of you fucking other women..." Finally, she turned to look her brother square in the eye. "I can't even explain how much that fills me with rage. And it's not fair. Not fair to you one bit, but I can't help it."
Bowen began to pace back and forth, her pale claws clicking on the stone. "I'm lonely," she finally admitted aloud. "I'm lonely, and when I'm alone, I dwell on stupid, pointless things. They eat me up inside." Without Haiku around to talk to, to spend time with while Artorias was busy or with Briar, it left a lot of time for Bowen to just sulk and overthink.
"I'm also worried," her voice grew a little softer and her pacing stilled. "I want to be faithful to you, but I don't know if I can. You can't be at my beck and call whenever my urges push their way to the forefront." Bowen raised a paw, rubbing the area between her eyes as the beginnings of a headache were forming. "I hate not being in control. When that need is upon me, I'd most likely agree to anything from anyone just to alleviate it." Well, she hadn't planned on ranting and raving to Artorias, but there it was. Again Bowen sighed, giving her head yet another shake. "Maybe I should just go. I'm more trouble than I'm worth, Artorias."
Bowen Arrow Carpathius
03-24-2022, 02:28 PM
For a brief moment, Artorias thought he might have been getting through to Bowen. Her depressive state was strong, clouding her mood with a thick veil of melancholy, but for the shortest of times, he began to see liveliness from her. Muffled murrs of delight while he showered her in affection, followed by a raising of her beautiful face, deep and rich verdant eyes seeking his while he spoke to her. Her abrupt laugh surprised him, but her words made Artorias' expression slip just a touch, especially when she called him a king. The Carpathian man never felt like a king. He didn't see himself as higher or more important than anyone else; certainly not above any of his wolves. But was he supposed do? Was Bowen right when she called him a king? Was an alpha always supposed to be a king? Did Resin or Ulric feel and act like a king when they were in power?
Bowen started to explain that his status as alpha was perhaps what made her feel so inadequate to be with him, that he could have anyone and that she feared he might find someone "better than her". Artorias' nose wrinkled at the thought, a soft huff of incredulity leaving his nares, but he didn't get the chance to rebuke her worries. Instead, his russet sister rolled his arm off of her and slid gracefully from the bed, moving to pace about the room while she got all of her thoughts and emotions off her chest and out of her mind. She didn't mind Briar—even liked the woman!—but the thought of another woman being with him enraged her. "Bowen..." Artorias tried to start, speaking softly, wanting to reassure her that her fears were unfounded, but Bowen was in such a state that she either didn't hear him or was so lost in her own thoughts that she ignored him. She looked him dead in his eyes, emerald holding citrine, and declared that it wasn't fair—to him. Art furrowed his brow, perplexed as to where these thoughts and feelings were stemming from. He couldn't recall doing anything himself to trigger this sort of response from her. How long had Bowen been harboring these toxic thoughts, letting them fester in her mind and heart?
"Bowen-" the young alpha tried to start again, but Bowen wasn't done with her self-loathing tirade yet, it seemed. She explained how when she was alone, her thoughts ate her from the inside, how her compulsive sexual urges made her worried about her faithfulness to him. "Bowen..." Bowen wasn't done. She hated not being in control of her own body. She didn't think she was worth the effort. And then she hit him with a single sentence that snapped something inside Artorias' heart. "Maybe I should just go." "Bowen!" The Aegis' voice echoed a fraction of a second inside the empty room as he bellowed and rose from the bed, massive paws meeting the floor while he closed the distance between them again. His eyes were no longer soft, but firmed in resolution and so full of love for the petite fae. He frowned, deeply saddened to know what demons his sister had been grappling with on her own, but never once upset or angry with her. Those large forepaws lifted to grasp her slender shoulders, keeping her from pacing about while he forced her to face him, jostling and shaking her lightweight body gently in the process. "I never want you to say that again. After all of this, after everything we've been through just to be together again, I won't lose you. I won't. Not again. Not ever again."
The love in fiery amber eyes didn't fade, though a sadness and heartache had begun to show in them the longer he stared into Bowen's iridescent pools of green. He hated knowing his beloved sister was struggling with herself like this. He wanted to help her, make her better, protect her. This wasn't something he could fix, however. But gods knew he was damn well going to try his best. "I won't be fucking any other women, Bo. I don't want to. I want you, and I have Briar. You have always been what I wanted, more than worthy for me. I will always be there for you when you need me, but you don't have to try so hard to be faithful. I understand who you are and I love you all the same. I'm not some deity or almighty king, Bo. I'm a wolf, just like you. A wolf that spent seasons looking for you, waiting for you to come home, praying that I'd get the chance to see you and hold you again. How much more worthy do you think you need to be? You are perfect to me, Bowen—all of you, even the parts of you that you don't like." Gradually, Artorias' firm grip on Bowen's shoulders began to loosen and his expression softened again, bringing one paw up to trace rough black paw pads across her cheek and jaw while he stared at her as if she were the most precious treasure in the universe. "I wouldn't change you for the world, and I'm not gonna let you go ever again." After a moment's pause, Artorias breathed a heavy sigh and said, "Wait here." Then he stood and headed out of the room.
Artorias was gone for only a few moments, returning shortly after with a small oak box in his jaws. He returned to Bowen and set the box down at her paws, using one of his own to scoot it across the stone floor towards her in a silent gesture for her to open it. Inside was a little labor of love he'd made for her: a simple brown leather bracer to match the one she always wore. This one was different, however, as Artorias had adorned the top and bottom edges with small emeralds and orange sapphires he'd brought back from the Firestorm Grotto. He'd wanted to have it finished in time for their birthdays, but had missed the deadline by a little bit. "I made this for you, so you would always have something to remind you of how important you are to me." It was a simple yet emotionally profound explanation. "You're not a problem, Bowen. You're not a burden or unworthy or trouble. You're my sister, my lover, someone I love very much, and I'd gladly do everything a thousand times over if it meant I could be with you at the end of it."
"Bowen & Artorias"
Bowen started to explain that his status as alpha was perhaps what made her feel so inadequate to be with him, that he could have anyone and that she feared he might find someone "better than her". Artorias' nose wrinkled at the thought, a soft huff of incredulity leaving his nares, but he didn't get the chance to rebuke her worries. Instead, his russet sister rolled his arm off of her and slid gracefully from the bed, moving to pace about the room while she got all of her thoughts and emotions off her chest and out of her mind. She didn't mind Briar—even liked the woman!—but the thought of another woman being with him enraged her. "Bowen..." Artorias tried to start, speaking softly, wanting to reassure her that her fears were unfounded, but Bowen was in such a state that she either didn't hear him or was so lost in her own thoughts that she ignored him. She looked him dead in his eyes, emerald holding citrine, and declared that it wasn't fair—to him. Art furrowed his brow, perplexed as to where these thoughts and feelings were stemming from. He couldn't recall doing anything himself to trigger this sort of response from her. How long had Bowen been harboring these toxic thoughts, letting them fester in her mind and heart?
"Bowen-" the young alpha tried to start again, but Bowen wasn't done with her self-loathing tirade yet, it seemed. She explained how when she was alone, her thoughts ate her from the inside, how her compulsive sexual urges made her worried about her faithfulness to him. "Bowen..." Bowen wasn't done. She hated not being in control of her own body. She didn't think she was worth the effort. And then she hit him with a single sentence that snapped something inside Artorias' heart. "Maybe I should just go." "Bowen!" The Aegis' voice echoed a fraction of a second inside the empty room as he bellowed and rose from the bed, massive paws meeting the floor while he closed the distance between them again. His eyes were no longer soft, but firmed in resolution and so full of love for the petite fae. He frowned, deeply saddened to know what demons his sister had been grappling with on her own, but never once upset or angry with her. Those large forepaws lifted to grasp her slender shoulders, keeping her from pacing about while he forced her to face him, jostling and shaking her lightweight body gently in the process. "I never want you to say that again. After all of this, after everything we've been through just to be together again, I won't lose you. I won't. Not again. Not ever again."
The love in fiery amber eyes didn't fade, though a sadness and heartache had begun to show in them the longer he stared into Bowen's iridescent pools of green. He hated knowing his beloved sister was struggling with herself like this. He wanted to help her, make her better, protect her. This wasn't something he could fix, however. But gods knew he was damn well going to try his best. "I won't be fucking any other women, Bo. I don't want to. I want you, and I have Briar. You have always been what I wanted, more than worthy for me. I will always be there for you when you need me, but you don't have to try so hard to be faithful. I understand who you are and I love you all the same. I'm not some deity or almighty king, Bo. I'm a wolf, just like you. A wolf that spent seasons looking for you, waiting for you to come home, praying that I'd get the chance to see you and hold you again. How much more worthy do you think you need to be? You are perfect to me, Bowen—all of you, even the parts of you that you don't like." Gradually, Artorias' firm grip on Bowen's shoulders began to loosen and his expression softened again, bringing one paw up to trace rough black paw pads across her cheek and jaw while he stared at her as if she were the most precious treasure in the universe. "I wouldn't change you for the world, and I'm not gonna let you go ever again." After a moment's pause, Artorias breathed a heavy sigh and said, "Wait here." Then he stood and headed out of the room.
Artorias was gone for only a few moments, returning shortly after with a small oak box in his jaws. He returned to Bowen and set the box down at her paws, using one of his own to scoot it across the stone floor towards her in a silent gesture for her to open it. Inside was a little labor of love he'd made for her: a simple brown leather bracer to match the one she always wore. This one was different, however, as Artorias had adorned the top and bottom edges with small emeralds and orange sapphires he'd brought back from the Firestorm Grotto. He'd wanted to have it finished in time for their birthdays, but had missed the deadline by a little bit. "I made this for you, so you would always have something to remind you of how important you are to me." It was a simple yet emotionally profound explanation. "You're not a problem, Bowen. You're not a burden or unworthy or trouble. You're my sister, my lover, someone I love very much, and I'd gladly do everything a thousand times over if it meant I could be with you at the end of it."
03-24-2022, 11:42 PM
He had asked what was on her mind and for some reason she had actually told him this time. Often Bowen just brushed off her own feelings, saying that she was fine. Everything was always fine externally simply so that she wouldn't have to do... this. Whatever this was. She brushed over the truth, saying everything was okay just so she wouldn't have to see that look on his face. Or anyone's face, for that matter. Mentally, emotionally, Bowen was a mess and she had been for a long time. On the ship, she had been confident. Life had been so simple then. Here, things were much more difficult. She didn't know how to process emotion like a normal wolf and sometimes it bubbled over. Like today.
Bowen hadn't realized how much of a tirade she'd gone on, her words and emotions undulating and shifting like the rise and fall of ocean waves. While she had been speaking, she hadn't heard Artorias say her name once. Only when he grasped her shoulders in a bruising grip, giving her a well needed shake, did she snap back into the present. Celadon eyes widened momentarily as she accepted the jostling, looking up at her exasperated brother. She hated seeing that look on his face. It was why she so often held her tongue. It wasn't right or fair to burden him with her inadequacies. It wasn't his fault that she was an emotional basket case and he shouldn't have to deal with it. There was already so much on his plate. Allowing him to see this side of her and adding to the worries in his life... it just made Bowen feel incredibly selfish.
Artorias spoke fervently, telling her that he would never lose her again. His words held a ferocity within them that made her believe every syllable. The tenacity in his golden gaze shifted to one of sadness and Bowen frowned. That look. A reminder of why she kept these things to herself. The woman's russet ears drooped upon seeing that look. Her brother continued to speak, assuring her that he wouldn't be laying with any other women. Hearing that didn't alleviate her fears, however. She knew how easy it was to get swept away in the undertow of lust. Look at her. She had admitted to him that she could and most likely would be unfaithful. He didn't care about that either, he assured her. Artorias then told her that he wasn't some deity or king and the woman sighed, giving her crown a gentle shake. "But you are. To the wolves that you protect, you are." Bowen locked their gazes. "To me, you are." Was it so difficult for him to believe that she practically worshipped him? He was the sole reason that she even woke up anymore.
Black pads found an ivory cheek and Bowen leaned into them, eyes closing momentarily. He said that he wouldn't change her, but she wished that she could change herself. A moment later, she was standing alone in the room that she had shared with Haiku. The space was as empty now as when she had first chosen it. As empty as when she was living in it. The woman moved to sit at the edge of the bed, her chest pressed against it while one dusky paw reached out to gently stroke the glass orb still laying on the furs. What a mess she was...
Sound from behind brought her looking over one burnished shoulder. Artorias returned, sitting a small wooden box before her. As she slowly opened the case, her brother gave his explanation. The delicate craftwork of the bracer brought a soft gasp from the woman. Her full visual attention was on the gift, but she heard every word that Artorias spoke. He'd made this specifically for her. Bowen wasted no time in sliding the bracer over her right foreleg, tightening the laces at the back easily. She almost felt bad wearing it, as though she wasn't worthy of something so grand. Her heart ached and her throat tightened as though an invisible paw was cutting off her air. In the end, she turned, placed her forehead against his chest, and cried.
Bowen Arrow Carpathius
04-04-2022, 12:25 AM
Artorias had paid close attention to all of Bowen's reactions when he gave her the gift he'd made for her. He'd expected surprise, joy, maybe some emotional choking up. What he hadn't been expecting were the tears. As soon as Bowen had affixed the bracer to her right foreleg and admired it for a minute, Art saw her face contort as if she were fighting back some invisible force, battling with herself. Then she leaned her forehead against his chest and began to cry. Not just happy tears—full on crying. Artorias felt a lump form in his throat, making it hard for him to swallow and impossible to breathe. His heart wrenched to see his sister and his lover in such a state. He wanted to do everything he could to help her, compelled by his nature to protect and fix. But Bowen's demons were not an enemy he could square off with. Oh, how he wished he could simply manifest them right here in the room, give them corporeal flesh so he could tear them limb from limb for daring to plague his Bowen. But life was far too cruel to allow him an easy solution.
Instead, Artorias was forced to watch Bowen go through her emotional catharsis, purging out all the emotions she'd held onto for gods knew how long. Raising his muscular forelegs, Art wrapped Bowen up in a secure embrace, clutching her tightly to him while she sobbed, treating her like his most precious treasure of all. So focused was he on comforting and caring for his sister, the Aegis didn't realize his amber eyes were beginning to mist up as well. The pain in his heart for Bowen was only a fraction of the suffering she felt, he was sure of it, and it spurred him on to do whatever he could for her. He might never fix Bowen—not in the way she wanted, at least—but nothing could ever make him regret having her back in his life, loving her as deeply and as madly as he did. He loved Bowen so much it hurt, stealing his breath from him and making him feel weak.
His forelegs squeezing tighter around Bowen's midsection, Artorias slowly craned his neck down to kiss and nuzzle the top of his sister's crown. He didn't say anything coherent, just murmuring sweet nothings and reassurances into her russet ears. There was nothing he could even think to say. All he wanted was to hold Bowen, let her cry out her pain into his fur so he might absorb it away from her and let her know nothing but his love and warmth and protection. "Shhh... I've got you, Bo... I'm here, I'll always be here..." All the while Artorias stared at the glass orb they'd found together as pups all those years ago. He watched the way the light caught on its smooth unmarred surface. It was like a reminder of how easy their lives had been before, how simple and untroubled they were. Artorias had said he wouldn't change Bowen for the world, and he meant that—but that didn't mean a part of him didn't long to go back to those days. Maybe then he could have prevented Bowen's abduction. Maybe then they could have grown up together the way they were supposed to, going on all the adventures they'd promised one another, discovering their love in their own way over time.
Maybe then life would have turned out differently, without his Bowen hating herself and him feeling powerless to do anything but watch while she imploded...
"Bowen & Artorias"
Instead, Artorias was forced to watch Bowen go through her emotional catharsis, purging out all the emotions she'd held onto for gods knew how long. Raising his muscular forelegs, Art wrapped Bowen up in a secure embrace, clutching her tightly to him while she sobbed, treating her like his most precious treasure of all. So focused was he on comforting and caring for his sister, the Aegis didn't realize his amber eyes were beginning to mist up as well. The pain in his heart for Bowen was only a fraction of the suffering she felt, he was sure of it, and it spurred him on to do whatever he could for her. He might never fix Bowen—not in the way she wanted, at least—but nothing could ever make him regret having her back in his life, loving her as deeply and as madly as he did. He loved Bowen so much it hurt, stealing his breath from him and making him feel weak.
His forelegs squeezing tighter around Bowen's midsection, Artorias slowly craned his neck down to kiss and nuzzle the top of his sister's crown. He didn't say anything coherent, just murmuring sweet nothings and reassurances into her russet ears. There was nothing he could even think to say. All he wanted was to hold Bowen, let her cry out her pain into his fur so he might absorb it away from her and let her know nothing but his love and warmth and protection. "Shhh... I've got you, Bo... I'm here, I'll always be here..." All the while Artorias stared at the glass orb they'd found together as pups all those years ago. He watched the way the light caught on its smooth unmarred surface. It was like a reminder of how easy their lives had been before, how simple and untroubled they were. Artorias had said he wouldn't change Bowen for the world, and he meant that—but that didn't mean a part of him didn't long to go back to those days. Maybe then he could have prevented Bowen's abduction. Maybe then they could have grown up together the way they were supposed to, going on all the adventures they'd promised one another, discovering their love in their own way over time.
Maybe then life would have turned out differently, without his Bowen hating herself and him feeling powerless to do anything but watch while she imploded...