Looking for the Daylight
Andromeda
11-11-2022, 01:06 PM
The hustle and bustle having the castle so full of pups and wolves had kept her distracted, but perhaps that was for the best. It allowed her to keep her own emotions and reactions at arm's length. She had stepped in to help watch after her younger siblings while her father did what he needed to do, doubling the amount of work she would have usually had from just taking care of her own litter. Honestly, she was grateful. It would have been so much more difficult to face things if they hadn't been here. What she wanted right now was to be with her family, but there was no way she could be away from her very young children for any length of time and with the Armada now so far away it would have been impossible to be with them during this time. Maybe she wasn't with them all, but she could at least give what she could to the babies of the family and her father who she knew would take this the hardest.
As she was going through her early morning routines, making sure everyone was up and ready for breakfast, she quickly realized there was a face missing. Worry gripped her and as soon as she was able to hand off everyone to Artorias she hurried out of the castle in search of Andromeda. She could tell that the young girl hadn't gone too far and that she had left the castle semi recently since her scent was fairly easy to find. It was really just a stroke of luck that they hadn't had any of the Auster spring showers in the night so she was able to find the trail and follow it quickly. As she trotted out onto the plains she spotted a figure laying in the grass. At first she could have sworn there was two there—one larger and one smaller—but when she blinked it was just the small, curled up form of her younger sister. She shook her head a bit, deciding she was still just waking up and it was a trick of the light.
Hurrying over to where Andromeda was laying she immediately began to assume the worst, at least until she realized that she was fast asleep. Briar sighed softly, a little smile crossing her lips. She didn't know why Andromeda was out here on her own, but she was okay and that at least eased her worries. Settling on her haunches beside Andromeda, she started gently rubbing the girl's back, speaking gently and quietly as she said, "Andromeda? It's time to wake up, sweetie. Everyone is heading to breakfast."
11-28-2022, 06:01 AM
The night had been rough for young Andy but she found comfort in the form of a ghost. It had not been her mother, who the lavender pup had sought to bring back, but the girl still found acceptance and love in the ethereal wolf named Zuriel. Out here, on the plains that the stars kiss, Andromeda had her the first restful night of sleep since her mother had left the family. Slumber had embraced her as if she was an old friend, swaddling her in sweet dreams of times past and happy moments that will never come.
Zuriel had said she would be with her as long as she could and, when a gentle voice stirs her mind into wakefulness, the pup’s first thought is of that sweet mother. A paw gently rubs her back and the girl lets out a soft purr of happiness as she stretches her back into the touch. With her eyes still firmly shut, the pup slurs out, “Zuriel?” Her mouth feels like it is stuffed with cotton and yet slimly and thick at the same time and her throat is sore from the sobs that that had ripped through her last night.
As she slowly makes her way out of dreamland, her deep slumber still trying to hold her down, Andromeda begins to try and stretch her limbs. Unintelligible noises leave her mouth as she moves, trying to press back into the gentle touch as works to open her eyes at the same time. Finally, two small slits of pale blue greet the dawning day and the girl blinks her bleary eyes while turning to see who has awoken her.
A blurry tan and turquoise form greets the girl and she immediately sucks in a breath, heart jumping into her throat as her first coherent thought of the day is, ‘My wish came true’. Weakly, voice crackling from exhaustion and thinly veiled hope, Andy calls out, “Mommy?” Quickly, she lifts a paw to swipe at the thick crusty bits that have formed in the corners of her eyes from all the tears that she had shed.
She wants to see her mom clearly and the purple pup fiercely scrubs at her eyes to rid them of any lingering blurriness before she turns her gaze up to the woman who has awoken her. Joy and excitement lift her features as her eyes roam up and find… her sister. All at once, her features melt, sadness pulling everything down as she realizes that, once again, her hope has led her to foolishly see her mother where she wants.
Big, round eyes look up to Briar, despair tugging the edges around them down as she softly asks, “Why did she have to leave us?” Whether Andy means Zuriel or Zee, the pup herself does not know. The sudden realization that she just wants someone to not leave her slams into the pup and her shoulders hunch under the pressure of loneliness.
Andy has an Eastern Chanting Goshawk named Aquila and two Snow Leopards named Leo and Gemini. They are always nearby.
12-05-2022, 09:53 PM
Briar's head tilted slightly as her sister groggily asked for something that sounded like 'zuriel', but it wasn't something or someone that Briar knew and she eventually decided it wasn't anything more than the sleepy grumbles of a pup trying to wake up. She continued to gently rub the girl's back to wake her up until she finally saw Andromeda's eyes start to open, giving her sister a little smile. Her soft smile was replaced by confusion and eventually a mix of guilt and sympathy when she saw the purple-hued girl suddenly jolt with excitement and rub at her eyes while questioning if she was their mother. It wasn't the first time that she had been mistaken for Zee and she was reminded briefly of their father's mistake in the wake of the first time they had thought that Zee had been killed. She very quickly pushed that thought away though, not particularly wanting to revisit that memory—especially not when she had a disheartened Andromeda who very much needed her attention more than that old thought did.
Watching the excitement die on Andromeda's face made Briar's heart wrench in her chest and her ears flicked back apologetically. She knew that there was nothing she could do about the heavy resemblance she carried to their mother, but it did make her feel bad about reminding her sister of what they had lost. Briar shifted closer to Andromeda as she was questioned over why their mother had to leave them, moving to sit beside her sister and slipping a forepaw around her shoulders, gently pulling the girl into her side. "I don't know," she replied honestly, giving her a gentle squeeze. "Nobody really knows how life is going to go... or when it's going to end," she added, tipping her head down to find Andromeda's gaze with her own. "But you have so much family here still that loves you so much. So many siblings and cousins, me, dad, uncle Artorias... We're all here for you. Trust me, I know it's not the same as having mom here, but... Don't make the mistake I made when I was your age and miss out on being close with your siblings because you're too caught up in what you can't change." She gave Andromeda a slightly sad smile, adding, "It's a lot harder to make up for lost time than it is enjoying the time you have now."
12-22-2022, 11:30 PM
Coming out of a deep, restful sleep is difficult for the young Andromeda and, for a moment, her sister’s blurred coat reminds her of their mother, Zee. Paws scrub at her eyes as she tries to rid them of the crusty pieces that try to glue her eyelids closed and she finally gets a good look at her. The hope that has been building in her groggy mind is quickly dashed as reality crashes down around her ears, reminding the pup that her mother is still gone. Lost in her grief for a moment, the lavender girl looks to her sibling, sorrow tugging at her features. Briar seems apologetic, her ears flicking backward as she looks down at her.
Suddenly, a rush of understanding hits the pup square between her eyes and the sudden need to reassure her sister slams into her chest. Softly, lovingly, Andy says, “You’re beautiful sis. And you look so much mom… which isn’t a bad thing. I just… I miss her. Ya know?” Sadness pulls at the corners of her eyes as her shoulders slump slightly, her pale blue eyes drift downward as a sigh rolls past her lips. Briar sits beside her and wraps one of her slender forelegs around her shoulders which has Andy melting gently into her older sister’s side. Her gaze raises as Briar softly squeezes her shoulders and the smaller girl meets her sister gaze.
Andy listens to every word, hanging on them with the pure, untainted hope that only children seem to have while she processes them with the understanding of an adult. A sad smile slowly appears and she nods but a sigh mars it by breaking past her lavender lips. Giving her head a gentle shake, Andy softly says, “I’m trying to enjoy the time I have sis… with you and your family. But dad makes it… difficult to do. He is so angry at mom and I don’t understand why. I mean, I felt it too but I didn’t lash out or ignore others. He just…” a small shrug of her shoulders is offered as her gaze diverts down to her paws, her next words even softer, “It feels like I lost them both.”
If anyone can understand, it is Briar and that is why Andy shares with her. Small body presses further into her sister’s side and she buries the side of her face into the fur there. Inhaling her sister’s scent, she attaches the knowledge that she is safe and understanding to it before mentally filing the information away. Eyes drift closed as she remains there for a while, allowing an easy silence to settle over them. Suddenly, her voice breaks the peaceful air and, not moving or opening her eyes, she simply states, “I want to stay here, with you Briar. I… I don’t want to go back to the Armada.”
Truthfully, the pup fears that, when they leave, she will be lost in the shuffle and that her already emotionally unavailable father will bury the children in work and study in an attempt to distance himself from them. Briar may understand that but, for now, Andy does not voice all of her fears aloud.
Andy has an Eastern Chanting Goshawk named Aquila and two Snow Leopards named Leo and Gemini. They are always nearby.
12-26-2022, 07:27 PM
Briar's gaze softened and a little smile tugged at her lips as Andromeda assured her that she was beautiful and that the reminder that she gave and the resemblance that she held to their mother wasn't a bad thing. She nodded with understanding as Andy explained how she missed her, Briar simply replying, "I know." She didn't hold it against any of her siblings or family that they saw their mother in her. Out of the many children that their parents had, she was one of the few that had heavily carried on their mother's appearance and that was no fault of her own and she knew that any of them that saw their mother in her didn't mean it in a hurtful way. She was happy to carry a part of their mother with her always, but she did wish she could keep from reminding them of her so easily when they were still hurting.
She continued to hug her sister while she attempted to frame everything that was happening in a way that might help her understand or at least soften even a little bit of the grief. She couldn't be sure how successful she was being, but it felt like more than she had ever gotten when she was Andromeda's age so she was happy for that. She listened and internally lamented over Andromeda beginning up how difficult their father was making all of this. She was glad that her sister was enjoying her time here in The Hallows despite everything that was going on around her, but she completely understood what Andy meant about their dad. Briar sighed as Andy mentioned how she felt like she lost both of her parents, the feeling resonating far deeper than Andy probably knew. She gave her sister another gentle squeeze, her ears folding back. She didn't want to tell Andy all of the details of what had happened during her first experience with her father's grief, but she could at least sympathize. "Dad... doesn't handle grief well," she agreed, gently rubbing Andromeda's shoulder. "His grief turns into anger and he wants to have a point of vengeance, something to take his anger out on, but when there is no physical target, when the thing he's actually angry at is death... It's hard."
It was quiet for a while and Briar held Andy agains there side, letting the purple-hued girl lean into her and sort through her thoughts for as long as she needed. She had no reason to rush back to the castle and she was happy to give Andy the time she needed. The statement she made that broke the silence probably wasn't as surprising as Andy might have expected to be. Still, it hurt her heart to know what she would have to send her back to somewhere that she didn't want to be. When she was going through the first loss of their mother, The Hallows had been her escape more than once, but she had been a bit older than Andy was now. Andy was still so young, even if the recent events maybe made her feel older than she was. "I'm sorry," she said softly after a moment, bringing her other foreleg around her and pulling her into a full embrace as she dipped her head to kiss the top of Andy's crown. "I know how it feels and I wish I could keep you here if this is where you are happy, but Dad needs you. At least for a while longer. I know it might not feel like it, but I promise that he does. But you're always welcome to visit and whenever you need me I'll come to see you too. Just send a bird and I'll be there as soon as I can, okay? And when you're older then there will be a place here for you if you still want to move here."
01-11-2023, 12:32 AM
Despite the grief that hangs like a thick robe around her shoulders, the young Andromeda enjoys the time she gets to spend with Briar. As they talk, the pup finds herself imagining what she might be like when she grows up. Will she like her beautiful sister? Strong and graceful under pressure? Andy doubts it and a part of her knows that is okay. They are both unique individuals who have their lives and experiences. That doesn’t mean that they won’t be there for each other or offer support when needed.
The lazily drifting thoughts bring a smile to the lavender pup’s lips and she listens to everything her sister says. Underneath the caring, kind mask her sister wears, Andy catches glimpses of the hurting wolf that lays just beneath the surface. A sage nod is given as Briar talks about their father being able to attack death itself and a weary smile tugs at the lips and she leans into her sister. If only it could be so easy. Hell, she would have taken a couple shots at it herself if she could touch it. Actually, she knows a whole slew of wolves that would be lined up to attack it.
It takes the pup a little bit to sort through her thoughts and, when she speaks again, Andy voices her reluctance to return to Armada lands. With her eyes closed and body pressed gently into her sister’s side, the lavender girl does not see her sister’s other leg move up to fully embrace her. However, as soon as she feels it encircle her small body and the pup melts into the embrace with genuine gratitude. Oh, how she has missed the tender moments like these. Hugs and kisses had been their mother’s forte and, with her gone and dad angry, the pup has missed these gentler ministrations.
A kiss is placed upon her crown and the lavender girl blinks open her eyes while releasing a soft, content sigh. Part of knows that she cannot stay here but it had been a nice thought and Briar’s words lift do her heart. Pale blue eyes look up at her older sister, drinking in every word that she speaks and, while there is sadness in the corners of her eyes, Andy knows that everything Briar says is true. Only when Briar finishes talking does the pup softly offer, “Okay. I love you sis.” She wraps her forelegs around her older sibling, returning the embrace and allowing herself to revel in the moment a little longer.
Unwilling to let go just yet, she adds, “Can Thorn and Dusk and Taly and Bramble and Ciaran come visit me too?” Hopefully, Andy looks into her sister’s eyes, already planning what she would show them all when they came to visit.
Andy has an Eastern Chanting Goshawk named Aquila and two Snow Leopards named Leo and Gemini. They are always nearby.
01-24-2023, 12:19 AM
Briar looked down at her little sister and held her quietly for a moment, letting the young pup process and hear everything she was telling her. She had been in Andromeda's place once upon a time and she knew what it was like to be somewhere that you didn't necessarily want to be simply out of duty to family, but in the end that's what their family did. They sacrificed for each other, cared for each other, and loved one another fiercely. That's what it meant to be a Fatalis. It was a hard lesson to understand as a pup, but now that she was older and she could look back on that time, she understood how much it meant to their father for her to be there for him and she was glad that she could at least be a source of tenderness for Andromeda. It was something that she had lacked back then and she was happy that she could at least make sure that Andy didn't feel like she was alone in this like she had. When Andy agreed and expressed her love for her, Briar's expression softened and she gave Andromeda another gentle squeeze. "I love you too."
Even in among all of the grief and heartache they were working through together, Andromeda proved she was still just a loving, excitable pup in the end as she rattled off all of the names of her cousins with the request that they get to come visit her too. Briar laughed lightly and grinned, giving her little sister a nod. "Of course they can. I know they would just love to come run around the Col with you." With her adventurous bunch she was sure that would be a great time for them once they were a little older and she was more confident about traveling that kind of distance with them. For now though, she thought it was time to get their day back on track. She gently started to untangle herself from Andy as she gestured toward the castle behind her, adding, "How about we get back to the castle so we can join your cousins and our siblings for some breakfast? I got some more berries and honey for us yesterday!" She knew how important even the smallest pieces of normalcy could be, even if it was something as silly as eating breakfast. Once she got Andy back to her paws, she gave her sister another parting kiss on the top of the head and started walking back up the slope with her to rejoin their family.