promise you'll remember that you're mine They were Tortugans now, it seemed. It was a strange thing for Ocena to get used to. She would find it difficult to get used to the milder temperatures and the no longer bitter winters, she was sure. And to claim a pack that had been so recently ruled by others seemed strange. How could the challengers that had stolen Glaciem from them feel so comfortable seated upon their new throne? But Ocena was finding it difficult to focus on such things right then. They didn't seem as important now that her pack had a home once more. The lands they would now rule were a far cry from their icy homelands, but they were better than being a pack of wanderers. And some would soon have pups on the way, she was sure. Mercianne and Awaken seemed to have grown close, and Ocena watched it all with a sort of mothering gaze. It was unlikely that Crusade and Cifer would be having any more children any time soon, but they were as in love as ever. It was sweet. And it made her miss Gargoyle. A sigh escaped the marbled female as she tilted her head back, summoning her mate from wherever he was. She felt bad about calling him to her when he was likely busy, but for the moment, Ocena just wanted to feel his presence at her side once more. She had almost lost him, and therefore she was allowed to be a little more clingy than she typically was, right? She could still remember seeing his form crumpled on the cave floor, and Ocena shuddered at the thought, pushing it away as she waited for Gargoyle to make his appearance. He would come, of that she was sure. He had never neglected her when she needed him. Speech

Masqurading as a man with a reason My charade is the Event of the season I hear the voices when I'm dreaming I can hear them say: ~*~ Honestly, Gargoyle was adjusting just fine. He'd traveled so much in his life, seen so many places, that his heart didn't start bleeding whenever he had to move somewhere else. Of course he didn't go around flinging flowers in the air, he was aware that he had to be sensitive to those like Crusade and Cifer who's lives had been tied to the tundra and feilds of snow for so long. On the other hand, though, he was still leader. Still a Chief. He had to lead by an example of acceptance and living. More than living, thriving. There were the wolves that kept going no matter what! Migrations, quakes, hell a volcano, challenges, lost leaders, bears - Anything! it was hard not to feel as though the collective soul of these wolves was immortal. However much they might be beaten down, they helped eachother stand back up in the end. It was an honor to be a part of that. An honor to hear how many of his packmates- his family - had simply walked out of the presence of the challenger - preferring to be rogues if need be rather than follow the ambitions of a she-wolf who'd attacked their leader. But most of all, he was honored by the mate who'd staid by his side. Ocena... he wanted to find her. His day was not complete until he'd seen her. And it was then that the howl came. He knew it at once. She was calling to him! The male had been working hard and his wounds were all but healed now. There would be a terrible patch of scar on the inside of his left leg, but his neck and belly and face were just about back to normal. Aided by the shedding and fresh growth of fur that came with the sudden warmth of spring. A warm spring. It was refreshing. Of course, whenever he got to missing the snow, all he had to do was gain a little altitude. Which is what he did now anyway. Paws beat upon the loam and stone and soil, pushing him higher up the slopes and away towards the direction of the howl's source. He'd been busy sketching out borders for the new territory, but he would put anything aside for Ocena. He sang out a howl as he caught sight of her but didn't bother slowing down til he was little less than a yard away. He went in for a nose bump and let a happy rumble drag out of his healing throat. "Hello, beautiful." If she was feeling cuddly, he wrap his neck round her head and let his chin fur brush her cheek. "Tell me truly," he said pulling back just slightly, "What do you think of the new home?" ~*~ Carry on my Wayward Son There'll be peace when you are done Lay your weary head to rest Don't you Cry No More

The howl that reached her ears alerted Ocena to the approach of Gargoyle, and the female turned towards her mate with a joyous smile upon her maw. In the air behind her, her tail waved enthusiastically as Gargoyle raced up to her, skidding to a stop as he bumped his nose lightly against hers. She smiled, moving to nudge him lightly as they wrapped themselves together. They fit together so perfectly, despite the size difference. It was just another reason that she loved him so dearly. "Hello," Her greeting was soft as she buried her nose in his thick fur, breathing his scent in deeply. His next words took her a moment to answer as Ocena remained curled against the massive form of her mate. "It's different . . . but I think I like it." Ocena spoke thoughtfully, "It's a bit of a change, but change is a part of life. I think we'll be happy here." It was only a pity that the challenger couldn't have come for Tortuga's lands instead of challenging Gargoyle. Then she would have had a pack and they would have their old home. But ah well. Things would work out, of that Ocena was sure. Turning a sharp eye on her mate, Ocena examined Gargoyle thoughtfully. "And how are you doing, my love? Are the injuries healing?" Again she fought down the image of Gargoyle laying injured upon the ground, very nearly dead. But he was almost the picture of health now. He looked a damn sight better than he had then. And for that, Ocena thanked the powers that were. She had been terrified that she would lose him. But he was all right now, and looking as irresistible as ever. Speech

Masqurading as a man with a reason My charade is the Event of the season I hear the voices when I'm dreaming I can hear them say: ~*~ The male watched her searchingly. He didn?t want her to sugarcoat things, he wanted her honest opinion? he just hoped that that opinion would be a good one. And it was. Good enough for Gargoyle anyway. He was glad that flexibility had turned out to be one of his wife?s many virtures. But before he could say another word on the matter, she had a question of her own. ?Ah,? the he wolf took a step back and spread his forepaws in the snow giving his head a turn one way and then the other so she could see for herself. ?I may be on the far side of five, but I heal just fine. To be sure I?ve had worse wounds? it was the blood loss, that?s all.? He grew a bit quieter. ?I-I am sorry, Ocena, to put you through all this.? An exhale escaped through his snout, and the male lowered his head so that their gazes matched. He was most in earnest, and he prayed that his mate would not try to shift the blame off onto the challenger or the fates. Gargoyle had done enough of that himself. In the end he was alright and his pack still had a good home, he could ask for no more and he didn?t let thoughts of his defeat weigh too heavily in his soul. But all the same, an apology was deserved. He remembered. He remembered the sound of Ocena?s voice the caves where he?d recovered. Though the fog that had been over him then had denied him clarity at the time, the memories were sharp enough. She?d been worried, she?d been fearful? Gargoyle had been closer to death than he cared to admit to anyone. What if he had died? What of Ocena? What if he had left her alone? It didn?t bear thinking about. Gargoyle did not fear death, even a violent, painful death in battle, but the thought of leaving Ocena sent a shiver down his spine so strong it threatened to raise his hackles. He sought to drive his mind another way. ?At least our pups are strong. From what Crusade tells me of how Galileo acted since the challenge, the boy seems ready to lead a charge himself as soon as he?s able. And Orica hardly seems to notice the difference so long as she has everyone around her." As for Avalon, he was yet to spend some good time with his larger daughter. But he planned too soon. ?It amazes me how quickly they?ve grown,? he added, unable to withhold the warm ring of a sire?s pride in his voice. ?They?ll be eight months old soon, and then a year come midsummer.? He shook his head. ?I really must take them on a good hunt. They?re old enough to start learning how to take the lead with smaller prey.? It was the musings of a good father; the happy conversation between parents that might?ve happened on any day. Perhaps nothing really had changed. ~*~ Carry on my Wayward Son There'll be peace when you are done Lay your weary head to rest Don't you Cry No More

Ocena red, white, blue's in the sky, summer's in the air and baby, heaven's in your eyes The tension seemed to melt from the female's frame as he stretched his neck, proving beyond a doubt that he was all right. Or healing, at least, mending. There would be no more of that broken creature, laying on the ground of the cave floor. She knew that he would be all right. He was her Gargoyle, after all. He would never leave her like that. "I'm glad to see that," The female smiled, moving to nudge her nose against his neck, hoping to nuzzle the thickly furred body, "It was a lot of blood..." Ocena observed a moment later, a shudder forcing its way through her frame. That was something she would probably never forget. The female rocked back on her heels, tilting her head back to meet his yellow gaze. "Just don't let it happen again." The female aimed for severity, but failed miserably when her tail wagged slightly in the air behind her. She was overjoyed to see that he was all right. She could get used to these new lands. She could get used to being a Tortugan wolf. As long as she had Gargoyle. As long as she never lost him, she would be all right. Glac--Tortuga would be all right, as long as they had their powerful chief. At the thought of pups, Ocena felt her tail wagging slightly, easily in the air behind her. Her children were all right. "They're taking nicely to Tortuga, from what I've seen." The female observed with a smile, "And as for hunting... They'll be fantastic at it if they take after their father." Ocena grinned at her massive mate, "And maybe soon they'll have siblings to help teach...?" Here she trailed off, pausing to wait and see how Gargoyle would react. This would be interesting. She hadn't the faintest idea of whether or not he desired more pups, but Ocena was aware of the pressing heat building in her body. And her window for having pups wasn't going to last forever. So it was worth a try. Nervously, Ocena waited for Gargoyle's response. TAG: Gargoyle WORDS: 346 NOTES: ocena's cheesy oops

Gargoyle heard Ocena's agreement to his words on hunting. Somewhere in his mind he was thinking away at where to hunt and who to take when Ocena's last words reached his ears.

"And maybe soon they'll have siblings to help teach...?"

At first he wasn't sure he'd heard her right. Gargoyle blinked, his face suddenly zeroing in on his mate, searching her eyes. Did she mean it? Really? More pups? He'd smelled the scent of her heat on her, of course, but he wasn't the sort to assume anything. He'd been around females all his life, heat or no he could still hold a proper conversation with them. Though... to be honest, Ocena pocessed the ability to make his paws weak at times. And the scent of her heat only served to remind him of last spring, and of their first night as mates. Gargoyle could think of nothing more perfect than the two of them together, unless it was the thought of the family they had created. And now Ocena's thoughts were turning to more pups? The heart within the beast did a quick doublebeat at the joyous thought. ? But he had to rein himself back. He had to say the thought that had knawed at his mind so terribly during their last litter that it had nearly killed him. He?d let the worry be shoved down and away during the joys and trials of the past seasons, but now it was that time again, and he could ignore it no longer. ?Ocena?? he began rather haltingly. ?Do you think- do you think we ought to?? Oh that was no good. All his eloquence seemed to leave him whenever he needed it most. Very well, he?d have to be blunt. ?What if the litter is bigger than three this time? What if the pups are larger or, worse, late?? He swallowed.

Their size difference was something so obvious that they?d never bothered talking about it. And normally it wasn?t a problem at all. He loved Ocena?s height. Dearly. He loved that he could carry her about by her scruff, or hoist her up on his back and take her through a ride through the woods. He loved being able to lay down and yet still be at comfortable speaking height. He loved how perfectly she fit into the crescent of his belly fur when they slept. And most of all he loved how she was so small that he could wrap himself around her like a blanket. It was times like that, when they were so close that he felt more at peace and yet more excited than he?d ever felt in all his life. His time spent with Ocena as mates was blessed with the sort of bliss that he hadn?t thought existed in this life.

If blame had to be laid at all, he?d put it on himself. He was the freakishly huge one. And though, usually he was quite proud of the fact? here it could lead to complications. ?Love, I could never forgive myself if I were to-to cause you harm.? Truth be told, he wanted more children, and he desired the closeness with his mate, -he was a male after all- but his care for Ocena would always overrule other concerns.

Ocena The silence reigned for several moments, leaving Ocena doubting. Did he not want her? She knew that that was ridiculous. Gargoyle had made it clear a thousand times over that he adored her, that he wanted her, and to doubt that now, well it was just silly. But it hadn't been so long ago that Ocena had been self-conscious about everything. Now it seemed that those days weren't as long gone as Ocena had thought they were. Gargoyle had always been the one to make her feel more confident and strong. He made her feel like she could do anything, as long as he was around. And he loved her. So it would be all right. Her doubt threatened to destroy her all the same as Gargoyle began to speak. He didn't want pups? Was she not good enough? And then he continued, and the doubt faded. Of course. Of course. How could she have been so silly? He was worried about her - as always. "There are always risks," Ocena began, picking her words carefully, "Life is all about risks. But we could keep a healer on scene. Mercianne is an excellent healer, after all." It was only a pity that Asheni couldn't be there. She missed the healer female. It seemed that her death had been the beginning of the end. Ocena moved to nuzzle Gargoyle as he spoke again, shaking her head slightly. "You won't hurt me." The female murmured, "I want nothing more than your children and your love. I can handle a little pain for that." Well, she'd rather have his love and no children than his children and not his love. If she had to pick, she would be content with his love and the children they had already had. It was more than the half-blind creature deserved. Galileo, Orica, Avalon. How would they feel about having children? But children would prove to the world that Tortuga was strong and could handle itself. It would be a political statement as much as it would be a statement of their love. It was the love that motivated Ocena, however. She wanted him and she knew he wanted her. "I want you to be happy." The female added a moment later, "If it will worry you, I am more than happy with what we have already. Our children are perfect." That much was true. But she did want him. That was also true. But she was happy with what they had. It was far more than she would have ever expected. TAG: gargie WORDS: 425 NOTES: babies!

He had pulled back a little as he spoke, needing to see his mate's expression, and more importantly needing her to see his. He wanted her to understand the protective worry that twisted in his belly. If he - if he were ever to lose her - and he hated even vaguely thinking of it - he wouldn't be the same wolf. Ocena cemented so much in his life. He had lots to live for, his sisters and their children, the pack and his friends, but the truth was that Ocena was in a class all her own. Without her, he'd loose his guiding star and he didn't like to think about what the loss and heartbreak might do to him.... Of course he would try his hardest to carry on for the pack and the kids and her memory if nothing else. But gods only knew if he'd succeed. Mentally, he shook his head. These were the sort of haunting visions that seeped into his mind when he started thinking down that track of thought. It was terrible! He hated them! But they were what made him so cautious over his mate. He guarded her the precious treasure she was. He was willing to sacrifice everything for her.

But she, it seemed, was willing to do the same for him. Her voice chimed in sweet and practical, about the risks that came with doing anything. It echoed something that he'd once said himself, about the fact that so long as a wolf was breathing, it had to be ready for the challenges that came along with it. The words worked to soothe him a bit. But he swallowed. He didn't mind throwing himself into the face of danger - elk, caribou, a snow leopard, boars, a bear, he'd taken them all. But endangering Ocena? That was something so different to him. He shrugged his shoulders a bit when she spoke of Mercianne. That was true, he guessed...

She moved in to nuzzle him, and the male closed his eyes, and lowered his head down to her, reveling silently in their touch. Of course he wanted to do more, to let them be more. A wolf only had so many years to live, and this was spring - their only chance for the next four season's time. It saddened him, it tore at him a little, to speak of denying them this, but that was how much he loved his mate. It was then that Ocena spoke, and her words proved just how much that love was returned. The male's eyes opened, wanting to focus in on hers. He drank in the words... She trusted him not to hurt her. She loved him enough to risk the dangers of childbirth. It... it took his breath away. In that moment he wanted nothing more to than tell her he loved her, but he found, with a swallow, that he couldn't speak. Only his eyes, lighting up like embers, were left to express it all.

Ocena's words took a pause, and then she added, that she wanted him to be happy. She was reading him so perfectly. And her next declaration - that she would be satisfied with the family they'd already made... well that sealed the deal. This mate of his - she was willing to face the pain of childbirth without a second thought, but she wouldn't see him worried. She'd push all her plans to the side, to keep him happy. Gargoyle shook his head. He couldn't believe it. "I don't deserve you." A growlish sound tore itself from his throat.

Suddenly he was moving forward, locking his right fore round her little form and pushing her back. There wasn't snow to soften a fall here, but Gargoyle counted for that. He moved like a bull, but he couldn't have been gentler. It was one excited rush forward, pushing Ocena onto her back, with his foreleg to slow and cushion her while his tongue came out to cover her face in wolf kisses. Had they been pups, they wouldn't have been cuter playmates. "Ocena..." he rumbled. He pulled his muzzle back from her, but not all the way - he let their nose tips touch and just sort of let his rest there comfortably. He didn't care how goofy it might look. This was love. He was careful not to squish her as he lay; the front half of his body was on her, their ribcages touching, but his hind legs were gathered and he kept the bulk of his weight off her. She was far too pretty a flower to let get crushed. He preferred to just look her, one leg benath her shoulders, keeping her close, the other laid out sphinx like beside her head. "My angel... why is it you love me?" he muttered, half chuckling, half sober. His voice teased her but it grew quieter as he added, "One year as mates, and yet the depth of your trust can still take me completely by surprise."

Ocena The female felt a frown cross her features as Gargoyle spoke. "That's funny, because I could've sworn it's me who didn't deserve you." The female spoke with a firm nod, though her tail wagged easily in the air behind her as she spoke. Oh, she adored him, and it was true. He deserved so much better than her. He deserved a female who could hold her own in a fight, who could destroy his demons with one fell swoop. But instead he had chosen her, and Ocena loved him all that much more for it. Ocena felt herself fall against the ground as Gargoyle move, trusting him implicitly to catch her and keep her safe from harm. And indeed he did, cushioning her fall with one massive foreleg as he began to lick at her. Her reaction was instant; within moments Ocena was reaching up, her tongue flicking from her maw and covering his face with signs of her love as well. He would not escape without every inch of his body being smothered in kisses. It jus t wasn't going to happen. They were pressed against each other now, him supporting his weight to keep her safe, and her reaching up, their noses just touching. "I love you because you're everything I'll never be and more. And I love you because you are you, and that's all I could ever ask of a wolf." The female spoke the words with a quiet conviction, even if his words had been meant to tease. "I love you, Gargoyle, because every time I see you, I get butterflies. It hasn't faded with time. And I doubt it will ever fade." The female nuzzled his cheek, breathing in his scent. She could keep going, of course. There was infinitely long list of reasons why she loved him, but there Ocena would stop to allow him to respond. Again, Ocena couldn't stop herself from nuzzling him. "I trust you so because you've never betrayed my trust." The female spoke, burying her face in his thick fur. "I love you, Gargoyle." She murmured into his fur, breathing in his scent. TAG: GARGYOLE WORDS: 356 NOTES: ---

Gargoyle ignored the words that implied that she was the undeserving one. They were pushed out of his mind at once as ridiculous. And instead he focused on her touch and her words. It was ridiculous but he still felt his cheeks warm into a blush when she showered him with affection like that. The two, they had their moments, but most of the time, they had to keep a lid on things. They were parents and they were the leading pair, a level of decorum and poise was necessary. But now? Now they could just be themselves. And Gargoyle loved it. The sensation he got as their belly fur mingled. The butterflies he got when she talked of how much she loved him - and then she talked about how she got butterflies! And that it would never fade.

He sighed softly, gazing at her. He could stay like this for hours. Forget that. He could stay like this forever. "If it ever does," he rumbled. "You tell me. Alright? You tell me, and I'll make sure I find a way to bring them back." His last words trailed into the deep, rolling purr as he pressed his nose into her the soft fur just beneath her ear, tickling her with his muzzle.

This girl. This girl would drive him crazy. He knew she was half blind, but how did she not see how perfect she was. He was dangerous, he was messed up, he - no he couldn't think of such things at a time like this, but needless to say, he wasn't the pick of the litter. And yet she adored him. She could see past all his faults and yet... she still somehow obsessed over her own. For a terrible second the thought crossed his mind... that if she was blind to her own perfections, maybe she was blind to his faults. No, no that couldn't be it. He told her what he had been. She'd seem a glimpse of it in the Soulless Forest. And if she could see the good in him, he'd be damned if he didn't make her see all the good in herself.

She spoke of how she trusted him. How she loved him. Well it went both ways. "I love you too." he said distinctly, "Because you're perfect, and I want to hear you say it." The teasing growl took his voice as he pressed his nose into her neck. Suddenly he was all over her. He licked at the side of her muzzle, over top her blue eye, at her cheek fur, her muzzle again. He was attacking her with kisses - and there was no getting away, the paw he had beneath her helped make sure of that. "I won't stop until you do," he warned her teasingly. The monstrous he-wolf had her pinned. She was his in ever sense of the word, and he was going to keep licking her until she admitted that she was as beautiful as he knew she was. And the longer she took, the quicker his tempo increased, chuckling as he lapped at her face just as lovingly as she had his when they'd first gone down. His giant's form wriggled in mirth, and not a little excitement. "Say it!" he exclaimed, and after a second he realized he was laughing, really truly laughing.

Ocena tell me, did you sail across the sun? did you make it to the milky way? Ocena had to giggle when Gargoyle spoke, burying her face in his fur for the thousandth time that day. "They won't." She assured him, nuzzling his form adoringly. "But if they ever go away for you, you have to tell me too. Because I'll make you feel them again." She promised him that with a fierce solemnity. He would never be allowed to leave her. They were too happy together, too perfect for each other. They would be happy together forever, Ocena knew that with certainty. Gargoyle's words were a comfort to the female, who listened to them and basked in them. And suddenly, the seriousness of the moment was shattered as Gargoyle began to 'attack' her, licking her and speaking fiercely. She was laughing now, laughing joyously as he spoke, and they were laughing together. "What if I don't want you to stop?" Ocena asked, her voice happy, but it took her a moment to continue. The old insecurity was fading fast, and before long, she had gathered every shred of her self-confidence and was speaking happily. "I'm perfect." Here she paused, nuzzling Gargoyle lovingly. "But you're perfect too. And you don't have to stop." Blinking serenely, the marbled female moved to lick Gargoyle again, smothering him in love and affection. Gods above, she loved him. He truly was perfect. TAG: WORDS: NOTES:

"What if I don't want you to stop?" Gargoyle heard her ask, and in answer, his love only intensified. He nipped at her cheek fur, careful to do no more than caress her skin with those fangs so unaccustomed to being used in so sweet a manner. His whole body wriggled over her tiny frame. He leaned forward to pelt her forehead with kisses and nip at the bridge of her nose, until at last he heard her admit it. He eased himself back, containing the excitement that was mounting in him like a summer storm. His shone like frozen shards of lightning as they looked into her, seeking to pierce down into her soul and see every part of the wolf he loved above all others. He accepted her nuzzle with a sound, just a hair too deep to be called a whine. Ocena. His Ocena. He waited in glorious expectation for what she would say next.

And he wasn't disappointed. She returned the praise to him and added that he didn't have to stop.

"Well then I won't," the male rumbled, and for a moment his humor was replaced with earnestness. His Ocena was right after all; life came with risks no matter what, and neither of them were the sort of wolves to surrender to fears. Especially when there was the option of surrendering to love instead. "Besides, two wolves as perfect as us? It would a shame not to let the world have more utterly flawless pups." In a few seasons' time their pack would be blessed with more fluffy, colorful characters running around and getting themselves caught up in all sorts of adventure. And all because two wolves with their own share of troubles were willing to put aside everything for eachother. Yes, they'd have their night as lovers, but for the moment, Gargoyle was in no rush. This moment here, basking in his mate's affection and warmth, was heaven.

--FADE--

Ocena His teeth against her skin were more like caresses than nips; Gargoyle had always been careful with her, always loving. And Ocena appreciated that and adored him all that much more for it. "It would be a crying shame," The female responded with a teasing note to her voice, reaching up to lick his nose lightly. It was good to hear, however, that he wasn't going to fight this. That he was going to sate the thirst that she felt for him, and give her what she wanted; pups and his closeness. He truly was perfect. And that made her the happiest wolf in the world. She had everything she would ever want with him pressed so close to her. This, right here, was perfection. Ocena could never want anything more than this. --fade to black-- TAG: WORDS: NOTES: so short but yes ocena and gargie babies everywhere