A Moment to Spare
Approaching the healer's den, she paused at a scent that she had smelled once before - yet it was much stronger then. While Soliel was pregnant, when she had her children, she smelled the same way. The yearling wasn't too surprised, and she was happy for the female - of course! It would be the first thing that she congratulated her on. Her den smelled of she and a Valhallan male that the beta had yet to formally meet, and she was going to have a family.
Perhaps this wasn't the greatest of ideas after all.
Collision had responsibilities that far exceeded her - she had accepted that her eldest brother wouldn't be around as much when she was younger, and he hadn't been. He had responsibilities as an alpha, as a father, and putting time aside to babysit his younger siblings had not been a priority and she held no resentment toward him because of that. Yet she couldn't help but dread Erani becoming the same way. It made her regret the time that they could have spent together that was wasted, and she clammed up before the healer's den entrance.
She felt silly, burdening a new mother with her problems. Especially when said problems varied from her abandoning brother to a male that she might possibly have feelings for in Seracia. Her eyes downcast, she let her doubts swirl within her, her tail drooping as her head turned toward the nearest exit. Leaving was a much easier alternative it seemed... yet instead she took a step closer to Erani's den and quietly asked whether she was there. "Erani? Do you have a moment?"
Erani |
Erani was counting. She was low on Lavender, it seemed. And Slippery Elm bark. A few of her mint types were low, too. She rose and looked through the unsorted pile; there was some Lavender. But no Elm bark or mints. Plenty of Cress. She began sorting out the various plants. The life inside her wriggled, positions changing, ever changing. She?d begun to notice differences in each of those bodies inside her. One would lead, and the rest would follow in a dance of wriggling and twitching; all but one, who moved alone. But of course, she couldn?t tell them completely apart; she couldn?t see inside herself, now could she? But she was sure now. There were five. As her mother had been sure of her brood?s number before their birth, now Erani was aware of the number of lives her body held. And so much more. She?d begun to deduce faint hints of personality. The first mover was always the most robust, distinct movement. Must be a male she mused. Strong. He?d be a good warrior or hunter. I don?t think a Healer will be in this one?s path of Craft. She smiled. Her ears flicked toward the mouth of the cave as a shadow fell across the floor. A moment later, Chrysanthe?s voice, quiet and? Was that a hint of tentative in her tones? Erani rose and turned. ?I?ve all the time in the world, Chrysanthe. What do you need?? Her eyes raked the young Beta?s body, watching for signs of injury; a limp, a favored leg or paw. There was no sign of any injury that she could see as of yet. So her eyes rose to study the blue gaze looking back at her. There was a note to that look on Chrysanthe?s face. Erani?s mothering senses, already trained by raising Cairo?s children, were now heightened to a new degree by her own pregnancy. The Mother?s Sixth sense. It told her that Chrysanthe needed no medical help. Just someone to talk to. To confide in. She nodded to a comfortable spot near the center of the main room and settled there herself, with room for the younger female. And there, she waited to see what Chrysanthe had to say. |
She could barely remember the last time that she had shared a den with another. For a moment Chrysanthe thought that being inside of Erani's living space would feel like intrusion, or that she herself would feel uncomfortable - but she was wrong. Incredibly so. She felt warm and safe and immediately she was hit with a wave of nostalgia. This is how she spent her days before the eruption. Here, with Erani and all of her siblings, where the rest of the world didn't matter and sibling rivalry was as simple as who pounced harder or could eat the most or howl the loudest and longest... everything was so much more complicated now. But one thing that hadn't changed, was her relationship with the blue eyed woman before her. The yearling took a seat beside her, laying down and letting their shoulders brush just slightly. "I... wanted to talk to you. It's been too long since I've just." Since they had just spoken, since she had curled up beside her and babbled about nothing at all.
She couldn't help but wonder why she had waited to long to speak with the she-wolf who was pretty much her mother.
Perhaps it was because starting was one of the hardest things that the wariess had done so far.
"I fought for Neo on the battlefield. He should be home soon - or I'll go and get him myself." She didn't know why it was the first thing that came out of her mouth. It certainly wasn't what she thought their talk would consist of, but it was out in the open now and she wasn't sure what Erani would think of it. Did that mean that she had done the wrong thing in fighting for him to come back home? "He left... because of me. I teased him, he was being horrible but I should have known that he..." How could she have known that his bitterness wouldn't wear off? That he would rather run off and away than fight for the ranks and position and power that he wanted so badly? "He hates us. For being ranked when we first came to Valhalla." Yet it wasn't Pip that was immediately promoted, but her. Her voice failed to reel back the emotion that she felt at the subject, all frustration with a twinge of sadness
"Everything's so much different now." She sighed, her ears drooping - and she faintly thought that she couldn't remember that they did so out of feeling rather than for the purpose of defense. Cautiously her eyes flicked over to the fae's face, hoping that her expression wouldn't be one of disgust, or worse, disappointment. Because no matter how upset she became at the matter, she couldn't... wouldn't apologize for fighting to keep him here. No matter his resentment, he was family. And Chrys couldn't help but wonder whether facing this problem with her brother head on would help. It had worked for her other challenges thus far.
Which reminded her... "I've also, sort of... met someone." Neo was a hard enough subject to dwell on - Gideon James was a matter all his own.
"Talk like this."
Erani |
Erani gave a light nod at the thanks Chrysanthe gave, a gentle smile pulling at her muzzle as the young female came to settle beside her and began to speak. ?Duties get the better of us at times.? She listened on, frowning softly. At the mention of Neo, her eyes showed a flash of pain, but she let Chrysanthe keep speaking, sensing that she needed to get everything out. Her ears pricked as Chrysanthe went on to take the blame for Neo?s leaving in the first place. She gave her head a soft shake, but kept quiet.
As Chrysanthe went on, Erani listened, gave no judgment, no word. Just listened. When there was a pause in Chrysanthe?s speaking, she finally gave a hum of thought. Then spoke. ?I went to the Battlefield myself and called for him. When he came, I saw what you haven?t seen yet. The bitterness we all saw at the last meeting has grown to hate. He even looked at me as though he would like nothing better than to rip my throat out. If you think of it, he was never truly happy with Valhalla.
?I also called for Kaien when Neo had gone. I know you all think he?s a lazy, cowardly piece of scum. But he wouldn?t lie to me. While he was a prisoner of Valhalla in the old land, I was the only one who thought to look past where he came from, and for that, I have his respect. He said that Neo was happy in Tortuga, has a mate he is content with, and I did smell a female?s scent coming off of Neo?s fur.
?I believe he will fight tooth and nail to stay in Tortuga. He?s changed, and not for the good. It?s not just you and the other siblings he hates now. It?s all of Valhalla.? Erani sighed, and Chrysanthe added something that made her mind turn away from the dark path it had begun to glance down. Deep blues glanced aside at the dark faced lass, her head cocking sideways. ?Oh?? She voiced. ?And who would that be?? There was a glint of amusement in her eyes, and a gentle smile in her voice, but her face was kept straight as she stared the younger wolf down with a gaze that would allow no dodging from her curiosity, and no hiding of certain parts. The mother senses were tingling.
The main reason was that when Epiphron had come home, she had been a littler embarrassed about being caught, but there had been no lack of innocence. No sense of shame around her. Chrysanthe however? There was something about how she said it that said something had happened with this someone. |
And so Chrysanthe waited that single moment that felt like a lifetime, until the healer began to speak. She listened, surprised when she heard that she had called for Neo herself. Perhaps in a way she was braver than Chrysanthe herself, even though the yearling had been the one to speak. Opposed to using politics, she had confronted the boy herself - and had spoken with him... only to discover the worst for herself. He hated Valhalla, he hated everything here. His family, the wolves that had raised him. What... had she managed to do with a single conversation? Yet it was too late now, it was all too late - she had claimed him into the pack that he hated and now he would stay here unless he became strong enough to fight she or Syrinx or Collision and he wouldn't be able to easily because they had training and he... "He can't go back, he can hate us - but he will have to hate us here." Unless Collision let him go.
"Maybe we can change his mind." False hope, not a single edge of confidence or vibrato lingered in her tones. She didn't believe that she could do anything to make the situation better - they would simply have to see how this all played out. Chrysanthe wanted her family with her, she wanted to protect them and love them and tease them and challenge them and be challenged - among everything though, making them miserable was no where on the list.
Which was why she hesitated to tell Erani just who she had in mind other than her brother. "A Seracian, Gideon. He... we..." She was probably too young to be speaking of the things that they had done. It was enough to make her pause, trying to fight the blush away so that she could properly speak. "Oh Erani, he was just so different - talking to him was unlike anyone I've ever come across. I couldn't help but like him, but take to him, to let him." She was impressed with him, oh easily she could admit that. "I wanted... too much and..." He had given it all to her without a second thought. She had been selfish and he had been something between a conman and a gentleman and she couldn't get herself to blame him at all regardless. Not one bit. "I'm not completely sure about my feelings toward him, but I want to be with him." She... missed his company, if she was going to be completely honest with herself. Sure, she was busy as one of Valhalla's betas, but in the spaces between patrolling and sparring and hunting the spans of minutes were she was alone felt like hours and it was horrible. It was horrible how badly she wanted to leave her den and wander off in search of the male - she hated feeling like this. Dependent.
It was as if those months of living alone had crumbled away and she was left yearning for constant company in a way that she never had before. "Do you think... he could feel the same way?"
"Talk like this."