*Set night after challenge* After she had seen to Leo, Amalia headed back to her den. When she got there, Athena was already curled up within it. Not wishing to wake her, she creeped in and laid down beside her mate. Her fur stunk of herbs, but she was too tired to go and wash up. It wasn't like she had even done much, Leo's wounds had been rather easy to treat. It was the whole ordeal of the day that left her tired, mentally drained from it all. Letting out a quiet sigh she just lay there, thinking over everything. Did she blame herself for what Bacchus had done? Of course. But Pip's words kept echoing through her mind, of her mother telling her that it was not her fault. Ama longed to crawl out of her den and find comfort in the one that birthed her, but it was late now. She didn't want to bother her mom, maybe she would find her later to speak to her about all of this. Epiphron had a lot of life experience, and she trusted her above everyone else. She knew that she could find solace in her. But most of all, she wanted to curl up beside her mother and just sleep in her den, much like a child. Feeling troubled, the tiny woman shifted, dark blue gaze falling over to Athena. She couldn't tell if her mate was asleep or not, even though her eyes were closed. "Athena? Are you up?" she whispered, not wanting to wake her up if she had fallen asleep. "Burn Baby Burn"

Athena had come back to the den soon after the challenge, herding their daughters along with her. Diana had been quiet as always, but Jayne was full of questions. Athena hadn't said a word the whole way back. She wished Diana and Jayne hadn't followed them to the battlefield, but there was nothing to be done about it now. There was a lot of things that couldn't be helped now. She had heard Leo's call for Amalia and breifly seen her wife go off with him toward her herb den so Athena had nudged their daughters into the den and settled herself onto her stomach there. And that's where she stayed for the rest of the evening, still completely silent. She could see Diana and Jayne growing more and more upset by this, but she just couldn't. She couldn't handle her own emotions, she couldn't handle anything. She had finally nudged Jayne over to where they usually slept and after having to do this a couple of times her talkative daughter finally took the hint and settled down. Soon both of the pups were asleep and she sighed heavily. She curled in on herself, her nose settling under her tail. Amalia still wasn't back yet and she began to wonder if her wife would return tonight. She dozed in and out of fitful sleep, the memories of the fight and of her sons early years continually invading her dreams and waking her up. A while later she heard Ama come in and felt her settle next to her. Athena didn't move, unable to decide weather she wanted to try to interact with anyone right now. But moments later she heard Ama's whispers and she sighed, lifting her head and uncoiling herself so she could turn her head to look at Ama. She opened her mouth to speak and just ended up closing it again. Another sigh passed her lips and her two-toned gaze drifted down to her paws. More specifically to the bracelets that rested just above her ankles. Her ears lowered to rest against her skull and her eyes burned with the threat of tears. "I... I thought I had finally escaped it," she whispered, trying to keep her cracking voice quiet so their daughters wouldn't wake up. "I thought we had finally gotten away from this... this blood thirsty trait that was bred into the Armadas. I didn't want that for our boys. I wanted them to grow up and know that it was okay to not be king. To know that family was far more important than all that. That respect was more important..." Her voice caught and a shuddering sigh past her lips. Her jaw tightened and she couldn't bring herself to lift her eyes to look at Ama. "But... but when I saw Bacchus there... I-I was proud. I was..." Her chest tightened and she felt like she couldn't breathe. Her shoulders shook lightly from the emotion and the tears that finally fell down into the fur on her cheeks. "talk" 'think'  "you"

Her wife shifted and sighed, causing Amalia's ears to fold back slightly. She knew that the gray woman would be just as upset as she was. Had she woken her up though? She was unsure, and didn't want to ask. Slowly she unfurled, and generally the tiny woman would mold herself into her. But this was different, right now they needed to talk. Amalia tried to meet her gaze, but the other woman refused to look up, instead focusing on her bangles. She whined softly, pushing her nose to her cheek, but said nothing. She wouldn't force anything out of her, not until she was ready. So she waited, but it didn't take long. Hearing the sadness in her tone made her pull in a shaky breath, feeling like she was inhaling ice. It chilled her inside, making her small frame quiver. She hated seeing Athena like this, it tore her apart. And then she heard the words, making her heart break even further. It was similar to what she felt, but there seemed to be more guilt in Amalia's reaction. Taking a deep breath she leaned forward, trying to push the bridge of her nose under her chin, trying to tip her mates head upwards. Her deep blue eyes sought to hold her gaze, her eyes also wet with tears. For a moment she was just silent, trying to just look deeply into Athena's eyes, relax in the silence for a moment. She needed to gather her thoughts before she spoke. "You're allowed to be proud, don't ever be ashamed of that. He's your son, my love, that feeling of pride is ingrained in your mind," she said softly. But had she been proud? Amalia was unsure, she hated fighting in its entirety. She had been afraid, but most of all she had been hurt. "Leo told me that he was just trying to get us back in his own way. I have no idea what happened to him on that trip, but it changed him. He's a new man now, Athena. I am deeply wounded by what he did... and I still feel like I was at fault. But..." she trailed off, looking behind her at their two girls. "we can only do so much as parents. When they grow up and make a name for themselves, we just have to trust that they will follow what they were raised on. You weren't really close with your parents, you're brother was really the only close family member to you. But our boys, they had us, each other, and the pack. We did our part, I guess... I guess we just have to allow him to do his." "Burn Baby Burn"

As much as she wanted to avoid Amalia's gaze, there was no avoiding it when she felt her wife's muzzle pull up on her chin. Athena reluctantly lifted her tear-filled eyes to Amalia's and her heart ached when she saw the same tears in her pretty blue gaze. She didn't want either of them to cry, but if she could she would take the entirety of this sorrow and this ache. She didn't want Amalia to have to shed a single tear over any of this. Amalia assured her that there was no reason that she shouldn't be proud of their son, but Athena couldn't make herself agree completely. Yes, she should absolutely be proud of Bacchus because he was her son, but... She wished she could explain her feelings better. If she had heard Bacchus call for any other alpha to challenge she would have been there at his side with her chest puffed out with pride. But he had called for Leo. That complicated everything. She listened quietly to Amalia. When she talked about Bacchus' possible reasoning it made so much sense, but worried her all the same. She had been trying to avoid connecting her father to this situation, but she couldn't help but wonder if Isardis wouldn't have done the same thing in order to get his family back under his sphere of influence. She would follow Amalia's gaze as she looked back at their daughters and she'd watch them sleep for a moment. They were so innocent... She wished she could freeze time and keep them like this forever. "This is the worst thing about being a parent..." she commented softly as she turned her head back toward Amalia. A sigh passed her lips and she frowned as she let her eyes find Amalia's again. "I know it was nothing we did, but..." She shrugged and let the sentence trail off, not really sure what else could be said. "It's just hard. It's all so hard." She looked down to her forelegs again and after a moment of hesitation she dipped her head down, taking each of her bracelets between her jaws one at a time and pulling them off her legs. It took a little effort to work them off over her paws. She remembered when she first found them, when she was still young enough for them to be almost too big for her. She nudged them away from her and looked back up to Ama with a shuddering sigh. "I think... I think I need to let go of those. I was a completely different wolf when I found those... They were me trying to be like my father. Before I realized how awful it all was..." "talk" 'think'  "you"

At her mates words she nodded her head softly, glancing back at their girls. "I know Athena, I know. But its part of the burden we have to bare. We have to be strong so that we can teach them all these things. One day when they are mothers and fathers, they will look back on our lessons for guidance. It's all we can do, it's their choice in the end," she said softly, nuzzling Athena's front leg. It was very difficult being a parent, of being responsible for another beings life. But no matter how hard they tried to mold and bend them, they would pick what they wanted to do and who they truly were. She only hoped that what they taught them when they were young would stick until the end, and that no matter what they would know that they were loved. Because she loved them with all of her heart. She never knew that is was possible to have that much love, but her kids at showed her that. Honestly, she could just sit in the den and watch her girls all day, all while praying that they never grew up. A fond smile touched her lips, and she searched Athena's face. When the taller woman bent down and removed her bangles, she watched with a sadness in her eyes. Athena had had those for as long as she could remember, the fur under them had even grown in shorter because of them pressing on her limbs. Her blue eyes followed the shimmering gold bracelets as they were shoved away, looking up to meet her wife's gaze. "But you also became who you are today wearing them. Don't let the thoughts of the past darken this time now, my love. We have our girls to think about," Oh... the girls... Her eyes lit up, blinking hopefully up at Athena. "What if we gave one of them to each of the girls? I am sure they would love that. That way they would always have a piece of you with them, no matter where they are. They can make their own name in them." "Burn Baby Burn"

She was so glad that she had Amalia's glass half full outlook on things. If it wasn't for her she wasn't sure she would be able to dig herself out of the holes that her thoughts pulled her into. It's true. Being a mother was the hardest thing she had ever done. Not picking up the pieces of her father's pack while he was sick, not being an alpha, not losing Vereux. This. Seeing her sons grow up and leave on their own paths and seeing their daughters grow far too quickly. But she wouldn't take it back, not for the world. All she could hope now was that they had done everything in their power to pave the ways for their boys and would continue to do that for their girls. She hadn't thought about her bracelets like that. She had only connected it with the time and reasons that she had gotten them in. Not the journey that she had worn them in. But hearing Amalia's view on it touched her. She glanced back down at them thoughtfully until Ama spoke again, pulling her gaze back up to her wife's face. Give them to their daughters? She glanced with surprise from the bracelets to the sleeping forms of their daughters. Pass them down... That was something she had never considered. She smiled and looked back at Amalia, dipping her muzzle to try to nuzzle her mate's cheek. "That's a beautiful idea, sweetheart. I think you're right, I think they'd love that." She paused and considered it breifly, adding, "They're a little bit too small still I think... Maybe for their first birthday. That would be a good gift." She smiled again with a quiet chuckle. The thought of giving these things that she had worn for so long a new life with her girls brightened her attitude so much. "What would I do without you?" she asked quietly as she went to kiss the tip of Amalia's nose. Things were still hard, they would be for a long time still she was sure, but having these moments helped make things a little brighter. She looked back to her bracelets and reached her paws forward to pull them back toward her, pulling them back onto her forelegs one after the other. Once they were back in their proper places on her legs she shifted closer to Ama and shifted onto her side, wanting to slip her forelegs around Ama and pull her close. She nuzzled her face into Ama's scruff. Athena felt better now, but she knew their problems weren't over. She knew that Ama would still hurt long after she had a smile on her face. "It's going to be okay," she said softly against Ama's neck, mostly to Amalia but partially to herself. "Everything is going to be okay." "talk" 'think' "you"