If there was one thing he constantly beat himself over, it was his sister and how he constantly left her. He felt like he had let her down, from the very beginning. Ever since they were children he always had his nose in the flowers, and barely focused long enough to help her find her thing. The poisoning had shaken him and what had he done? Left, became scarce. Refused to come home for extended periods of time because he was terrified and weak. While she suffered and healed and grew and he felt like he was a stranger. A stranger to her, and all his siblings, now. But if there was one thing he really had to make right, it was this. He needed her to know that he loved her more than anything in this world, and he didn't want to hurt her or leave her. Who knows, maybe she didn't even notice? After all, this wasn't new. He had done this so much and so often. But for him to feel any better, he had to apologize. But in order to do that, he had to find her. Which meant walking around the Abaven packlands and hoping he wouldn't get yelled at or bit again for leaving...again. He still had the scare from Lillie on his shoulder, and he still heard Lark and Bass' words in his head. He loved them all, but he felt...like they didn't understand. Shaking his head slowly, he quickly moved through the grass, searching for Finch before turning to move towards her den. Hopefully she was there. He was feeling the panic rise the longer he was out like this, and he had to fight the urge to turn to go back to his own den near his stores. "Burn Baby Burn" || "Bruciare Bambino Bruciare"

Ever since she had caught on that both Lark and Lillie were sick, she had been sticking close to her den. She had just been ill, and she had no intentions of being like that again. It took a long time for her to recover, and the idea of going through it all over again made her shutter. Slowly she pushed around one of her shimmering stones, while Civetta cleaned out bugs and pests that tried to eat her dried flowers. She really was quite useful to have around, she stopped the critters from destroying her collections. She was about to go and have a nap when the shuffle of paws reached her ears. Perking, she poked her head out to see who it was, leaving her companion to put the stone back. When she saw that it was Starling, her ears pinned back to her head. Her pale eyes were cast off his form, a sigh leaving her maw. She couldn't very well ignore him, but she didn't care to be out in the elements either. With the constant rain made everything wet, and the dampness in the air made it hard to stay dry. So she looked back up at Star before inclining her head back into her den, ducking back inside as she did so. She eyed her feathered friend, who could see that they needed privacy. Nodding her little head, he hopped towards the entrance of their den and flew off. She would come back later, it was about time that she went to check on her own nest in the area. "SPEAK" "SPEAK ITALIAN" "CIVETTA SPEAKS"

Starling froze the moment he saw his sister poke out from her den, watching intently for some sign of happiness. But whatever happiness might have been there seemed to quickly flood her face as her ears fell back and her eyes moved away from him. A lump, large and choking, settle itself in his throat, and he felt the overwhelming need to cry. Sky blue eyes burned as he swallowed at the feeling, his own gaze shifting to the ground. He waited for a word, waited for her to tell him to go away, but it never came. Instead, she seemed to reluctantly invite him in. And oddly enough, that stung more. A gasp for breath ripped from his throat before he could stop it, and he quickly coughed to try and cover over it, hoping the rain would be a good excuse for the stinging in his eyes. Slowly he inched forward, unable to turn away and leave, but unable to feel...happy about following. She was upset, it seemed to him. Not that he expected a welcome home wagon. No, those stopped a long time ago. Lowering his head, he moved into the den after her, quickly sitting in the smallest way possible by the entrance so he wouldn't take up too much room. He felt like an intruder on her home and her life, and he instantly wanted to leave. His jaws parted before closing several times, fighting with the words he wanted to say, but all he could do was sigh and stare at the ground. "Mi dispiace" He whispered in his pathetically pitched voice, the words fighting to get around the tightness in his throat. "Burn Baby Burn" || "Bruciare Bambino Bruciare"

Finch sat there, watching him open and close his mouth several times. She sighed, and her heart still broke for him. It was obvious that her brother was going through something, maybe like an early midlife crisis or something. When he finally spoke, she looked up and met his similar coloured eyes. A small smile was offered, but her ears did not moved from their pinned position. "Sei stato dicendo che molto ultimamente ..." she whispered, shuffling awkwardly on her paws. She honestly didn't know what to say to him, or what to feel towards him. She was hurt that he wasn't there for her when she needed him, but her other siblings had been quick to fill up the gaps. She sighed again, raising to her paws and trying to push her nose softly into his cheek. "Ciò che è stato con te? Non siete stati in giro, e papà è cresciuto pazza. Non sappiamo mai dove sei la maggior parte del tempo ..." She pulled back, trying to study his face. Concern was written all over her features, blue eyes holding her worry. "Sei in una sorta di guai?" Her voice was soft, hardly above a whisper as she held her breath. "SPEAK" "SPEAK ITALIAN" "CIVETTA SPEAKS"

Starling continued to stare at the ground, his jaw clenched and tight as he waited for her to speak, to reprimand him or accept his apology. He wasn't sure what he wanted more, what he expected. Whatever it was, he wanted her to talk to him. He missed her, a lot. Slowly he lifted his gaze to her when her soft voice filled the den, and his chest grew so tight and he felt so heavy. Everything felt so wrong, and no matter what he did he couldn't seem to get a hold, get a footing. He stayed silent as she spoke, wincing away when she mentioned their father and his eyes quickly looked back to the ground, unable to meet her gaze. He whined softly as she pressed into his chest, and he leaned back, away from her touch and affection he didn't feel he deserved. "Mi sento...rotto." He whispered, his voice heartbreaking as he closed his eyes tightly. "Ho cercato così difficile ... per essere qualcosa di padre può essere orgogliosi. Ma ... mi sento così inadeguato , per tutto il tempo . Un fallimento..." He nearly squeaked out, feeling his chest grow tight and his heart race Feeling...dizzy. "Tutto continua ad accumularsi , tutti i miei errori , ogni momento , ogni decisione . E ' difficile respirare , difficile pensare . Difficile anche essere più qui. Non riesco mai a essere qualcosa di ... essere orgogliosi." He shook his head then, sighing heavily. It was hard to explain, he couldn't put it all into words. But he couldn't seem to get his head above water. He couldn't get his footing. "È difficile da spiegare. Sono così stanco , sorella ..." "Burn Baby Burn" || "Bruciare Bambino Bruciare"

He leaned away from her touch and Finch pulled herself back. She pulled back, and for the first time since the meeting she felt that feeling boil up in her. Anger. She listened to his words with her ears back, her head pointing in one direction. She glared at the wall, waiting for him to finish his words. She looked back at him, her gaze sharp. It softened somewhat as she glanced at him, a huff leaving her maw. "Io non ti capisco Starling. Quante volte dobbiamo dire che siamo orgogliosi di voi, o che si sta facendo un buon lavoro? Ho sentito padre ti ha detto che lui è orgoglioso, ho sentito un certo numero di lupi dirlo! Non ti basta ascoltare e sedersi nel vostro piccolo mondo triste? Non so cosa dirti Starling, perché ogni volta che dico qualcosa, si lancia di nuovo in faccia con qualche commento negativo." Her voice rose slightly before she closed her eyes, hanging her head slightly. She didn't get mad often, not at all. Slowly she opened her eyes again, her features softened. "Voglio dirvi che siete abbastanza buoni, e che io sono orgoglioso di voi, ma ho paura che tu non mi senti. Non hai mai sentito nessuno di noi. È necessario aprire gli occhi e rendersi conto questo prima di tutti noi spingere via. Sono stanco troppo fratello, stanco di non ti senti il tuo valore." "SPEAK" "SPEAK ITALIAN" "CIVETTA SPEAKS"

Starling lifted his gaze slightly to look at her when a small amount of silence stretched on, and he almost wished he hadnt. Anger was rare to see on his sisters face, and to see it directed at him...even if she wasnt looking at him. It hurt. A slow burning crawled up his throat, through his cheeks and his eyes and he just wanted to break down there. So maybe she could see he wasn't just choosing to not listen. Something was wrong and he was in pain and so scared and so...tired of all this. But, he listened to her, staring at the ground and trying not to cry. He hung his head, feeling so heavy and so tired, but he didn't dare speak. Not yet, not until he could breathe. Slowly, he shook his head, his eyes closed tightly. "I-I know!" He stuttered out, his voice nothing but a gasp as he tried to get ahold of his breathing. "I-I know w-what you all say! B-but th-this is what I f-feel F-finch and I can't stop!! I've t-tried...I've tried s-so hard...I d-don't kn-know what to do anymore." His voice rose too, but not in anger. He looked at her in desperation, tears on the edges of his wide blue eyes before he quickly moved to his paws. He couldn't breathe, his chest felt so tight. "Mi dispiace Finch." He cried. He couldn't be in here anymore, he couldn't breathe. "Io...devo andare...Non riesco a respirare ." He whimpered in a pitched voice, quickly turning away from her to step out of the den and into the rain. "Burn Baby Burn" || "Bruciare Bambino Bruciare"