Lykos hadn't followed the pack down south. Gryphon knew his mother had demoted his littermate in punishment, had refused to let him leave the pack, but maybe Dragon had let him go once he'd taken over. After all, Lykos had served his time. It wasn't right to keep one of their siblings prisoner - hadn't Kharnage been allowed to leave the pack? So without any knowledge of what had passed between his siblings he simply assumed that was what had happened. Lykos leaving did make it difficult to speak with him though. Since his conversation with Avalon in the north before she'd handed the pack over to Dragon it had been itching in the back of his mind, seeing the rift in his family growing deeper and deeper and knowing only one side of the story. Everyone in a situation had their own angle on it, as near as he could figure, and while he knew his mother wasn't lying... it didn't mean that she was completely right, that hers was the only way to look at things. Rationally, logically, he knew that no one really thought of themselves as the villain when they did things, made choices that maybe went against others, so Lykos had to have had a reason for doing what he did. The larger brother had been so stubbornly attached to rules and laws and order that to go against them he surely had a reasonable thought process to bring him to that end. Perhaps if he could talk to his brother, could learn his point of view, he could take steps to heal the chasm between his family whether they liked it or not. To that end he waited until the north rolled to spring and he could count on not being a miserable cold lump of ice the whole trip, then headed off towards the north and their former territory at the easy, groundeating lope wolves are so well known for, to try to track his erstwhile littermate down. He didn't tell anyone before he left, though he supposed he should have. He didn't want Dragon to know what he was up to; he rather doubted his more emotionally driven brother would understand the logic behind it. He'd yet to see any sign of Kharnage in the pack, so maybe he'd try to find Lykos' look-alike while he was up here. There was one possibility that shook him deep to his bones, though he refused to acknowledge it even to himself. Either or both of his missing brothers could simply be... dead. Avalon believed that their father had abandoned them, but thought Gryphon hadn't asked her he wondered how she'd known. Logically, it was equally likely that the male had been killed while away. Life was dangerous for a lone wolf. There was the ever present specters of disease and starvation looming over them, and larger, deadly predators who would have no qualms about ridding themselves of a rival. And that logic extended itself, all unwillingly, to his brothers. They could be dead. As angry as he was at Lykos' actions, as much as Kharnage's attitudes had irritated and rubbed him the wrong way, the thought - however well he squashed it - that either of them could be gone forever squeezed his insides into a cold hard block of dread. But it was logical, wasn't it? That it would be possible that was why neither had chosen to accompany the family south, or even attempt to seek him out to say goodbye. They would have, if they'd been alive and thinking clearly... right? Surely he hadn't done anything to either of them to warrant avoiding him? His long journey ended where he'd spent most of his time while he was in pack lands - the pines. Vereux and his brats had always seemed to be haunting the mines so he'd never gone there, and he rather suspected Lykos would have been the same. Nose to the ground, the earthen-coated ranger strode intently through the territory, searching for any sign of his brother. ""

The answer had been no. It was something that stirred anger into the heart of the young man - as if being held prisoner for two seasons wasn't enough; Dragon had to go and make it longer. Well, attempt to. No matter; Lykos simply... didn't go anywhere when the pack moved. If Dragon refused to let him go proper, then Lykos would simply release himself from the pack. It was to the point where not even a hint of Talis was on Lykos' pelt anymore, and that was exactly how it should be.

Still, he didn't move from the pines. It was to the point that winter was now passing, and the snow with it. Not as far north as he might have liked - especially to avoid his family - the snow didn't stick around much longer once it started warming up. He felt no motivation to leave, and he wasn't entirely sure as to why. There wasn't much logic behind it.

He wasn't expecting company, though, not in the least; he figured - perhaps wrongly - that the rest of his family would just believe Avalon's words, and he'd given up immediately, not even bothering to fight for himself, not even bothering to fight for the truth; for his perspective. Avalon hadn't even given him a chance - had immediately declared him a traitor for confiding in a wolf that he'd grown to trust impeccably. He just... thought that the rest of the family would do the same.

So when he scented a familiar scent, of earth and sun and leafy trees, he froze. What was Gryphon doing here? It was clear why the male was here, at least to Lykos - why else would his thin-coated brother return to the North if not to investigate Lykos' lack of presence? And did he come on Dragon's will, or his own? He knew Gryphon was rather logically driven and shared his suspicions regarding most things, but his brother also had a deep-seated connection to family that he could never possibly let go. So was he here for delivering punishment, or something else? That connection to family was something that was not easily shaken, so it was possible that it still applied to him.

Either way, he knew perfectly well there was no use hiding. His brother had always been good in tracking to him, and he had absolutely no desire to hide and cower like a defenseless pup among the woods and prey. So he began tracking his brother himself, figuring out where he might be going, where he'd be. It didn't take long for the scent to grow strong, and even less time after that to spot the brown and black pelt with his nose to the ground. He opened his mouth to say something... and then closed it, not knowing what to say, just watching quietly instead.

"Lykos"

Caught up in tracking as he was, the wary ranger still kept part of his attention on his surroundings. Anything could have moved into the Pines since they had been gone - bear, cougar, wolf. So when the soft sound of paws behind him came close enough to hear, Gryphon's ears immediately flicked toward the sound, and his sleek earthen head turned. He wasn't sure if he was surprised to have found Lykos to be there, or rather to have seemingly been following him. All that time in the pack he could have tried to seek Gryphon out and hadn't, so why would he be following him now? Gryphon watched him neutrally, silently, for a long measuring moment before he moved to stalk closer to his larger, darker brother. Closer, but not close, and he stared at him over an expanse that felt like fathoms distant despite being near enough to speak easily. "Hey asshole," he greeted Lykos in a conversational tone that made no attempt to cover the hint of steel beneath it. "It's been a while, hasn't it? How have you been? How's the family? Oh that's right... you wouldn't know. Because you abandoned them. Abandoned me." His fangs flashed in the light as he forced the words out in a snarl. He knew that coming at it aggressively was entirely the wrong way to go about things with Lykos, but gryphon was hurt, he was angry, and he felt keenly betrayed by his brother having so casually abandoned him. He knew it was the wrong way to go about it, but the sight of his brother made all that hurt well up and grab hold of him, and Gryphon was unprepared for the current that ran through him. He'll the last time he had seen Lykos, Lykos had been happy and playful with him, and then nothing at all for seasons before he had just abandoned him altogether. "How could you?" It was bewildering, so startlingly, glaringly out of what Gryphon would have expected from his sibling that it had seemingly come out of nowhere. He had always been so observant, so good at reading others, but this? He had never seen this coming. Kharnage, sure, but Lykos? Never. ""

It didn't take long for his brother to notice his presence. In fact, it was noticed immediately, and Lykos had expected nothing else from his brown-furred sibling, ever the expert in his surroundings. They stared at each other for long moments, until finally Gryphon spoke; Lykos said nothing at all, because... well, he was at a loss of what to say. He didn't know what to say.

The hurt and anger in his brother's voice made a pang of pain go through the young wolf, and he cringed inwardly. Nothing showed on the outside, though, only the same emotionless expression, blank and empty, much as Lykos' thoughts and feelings had been lately. At least... until the end. When he spoke of abandonment. A laugh burst out of him, sardonic and bitter. "Me? Abandoning them?" he laughed again, a hint of the raw pain that he'd experienced so many seasons ago coming out briefly. "Before or after I was told I was a traitor for having a friend outside the pack? Before or after I was that I was no better than a man who possibly abandoned his mate - or so our mother believes? Before or after our mother told me that all this time she believed that you all were more loyal because you guys immediately left Imperium, whereas I stayed? Before or after she banned me from leaving Ivalice, sentencing me to a rank that is scarcely above a slaves and prevented me from leaving the territory without an escort? Before or after our dear beloved Dragon refused to release me from Talis when all I want to do is get away from them." The words came out in a rush, and all of sudden, they were less of responding to Gryphon, and more the internal conflict that had been in his chest for seasons. "Before or after I was basically told that I could have no friends outside the pack, without it being held against me, or make any decision based on my views, without it being used against me seasons later after being reassured that my decision was alright?" Sure, it was nearly repeating what he'd already said, but it meant something. To him, anyway.

But... his brother was also correct, to a degree. He might have abandoned the family, after the majority had done so to him, but... Gryphon never had. Gryphon never had abandoned him; never intended to. He'd abandoned his thin-furred brother first, and there was no excuse for that. "But you're right. I did abandon you, when you were the only one who did not do that to me. For that.. for that, I apologize." The words themselves may be formal, almost, but were sincerely true, regardless of the phrasing. Because that was wrong, and Gryphon was in as much pain with that as he was, and it was Lykos' fault. Knowing what it felt like, he didn't wish it on anyone - and he certainly didn't want to be the cause of it.

"Lykos"

Gryphon listened silently, without change of expression or interrupting, while his brother ranted about all the ways he'd been hard done by before finally trailing off into an apology to Gryphon personally. Gryphon didn't, for now, acknowledge that, instead levelling a hard stare at his brother. "I think you're an idiot," he told him bluntly, anger and a hurt that hadn't been assuaged roughening him. "I think you made some bad decisions and trusted some bad people." He shrugged his shoulders restlessly, settling his hackles. "I don't, however, think you deliberately betrayed any of us, and I think Mom and Dragon were wrong to treat you like you had." A sharp note entered his voice then, though, as he said, "Why did you go to Mercy about what you found out instead of me? I'm your brother and you knew I agreed with you; I could have helped you. Instead you told some former packmate with a grudge against us, and she turned around and betrayed you. Trespassing on our land, deliberately provoking Mom into a fight so she could hurt her, and how do you think Mom knew you'd told Mercy anything?" He finally forced himself to sit stiffly, and added, slightly plaintively, "What did you tell her about Vereux anyway?" No one had ever bothered to tell him, and while it probably didn't matter with Vereux dead now it still bothered him to be so far out of the loop. Lykos hadn't told him, Avalon hadn't told him, hell Dragon had apparently known enough and hadn't even told him he'd refused to let Lykos leave. Did he just matter so little to the rest of the family that they didn't think it would be worth the time to tell him anything? ""

Lykos opened his mouth to protest when he was called an idiot, anger flashing in his eyes... and then he closed it wordlessly, the anger dying away. Okay. Maybe. Maybe he had been an idiot. Just... maybe. He should have also gone to Gryphon when it happened, instead of just ignoring and shutting everything out. He did, however, have to keep in a snort when his brother continued on and mentioned how he didn't think he deliberately betrayed anyone. Well, no fucking shit. That was pretty obvious.

The anger stayed flared as his brother demanded to know why he went to Mercy. Why was everyone so fixated on that? Was he not allowed to vent to someone not in his family? His ear flicked back slightly as Gryphon mentioned the grudge; he was pretty certain that he was uh, the cause of that grudge. Also the cause of her being a bitch and trespassing, and then fighting instead of just leaving. And he already knew how their mother had found out; because Mercy snapped at Avalon and told her.

And what did he tell her? At his brother's quietly sad tone, just a hint of it, the annoyance faded. "I didn't go to her with what I found out with the intention of getting help," he huffed. "After you and I talked, I stayed outside the territory because I was still irritated, especially with that new rule of you're not allowed to tell anyone or talk to anyone about anything regarding anyone in the pack. So I stayed, wandered around the neighboring territories, and we ran into each other. She realized I was upset, and I told her why I was upset, with that rule in place and with Vereux trying to get close to her at the time, when he asked to be her second-in-command. And how I thought that rule was stupid, and that it was just trying to protect someone. I thought it was Vereux, and seems like I was correct. And... well, also about how I was bothered by being made heir and how it caused a rift - that still persists - between Dragon, Kharnage and I."

He paused, falling silent for a few moments before starting up again, recalling that conversation. "She gave me advice, as well. Not in a mean way, either. In a sincere, genuine manner, she gave advice and comfort and just listened. I think... I think also that she might have taken that out of hand, taken my anger and made it her own - and that was the grudge that she held, because of me. Because I wasn't comfortable, Gryphon." He glanced up at his brother, because he'd ended up looking away. "I wanted to leave the pack, even then. But I felt an obligation. I think Mercy may have been angry at that, at Mom for making me feel so conflicted." It made sense to Lykos, and even now, he couldn't truly be... angry, because in a way, it was his fault too. He didn't justify what she did, but he still didn't think she was a bad person. Not intentionally, anyway.

"I think her trespassing was her basically... not having respect for Mom and testing her to see what she'd do. That's my theory, anyway. Doesn't make it right, and I still don't know what happened between the two of them really. I just know that they fought, and that Mom lost, and Mercy mentioned me not trusting Vereux and not being happy in the pack. Then Mom yelled at me, shoulder still bleeding, refusing to get it treated, calling me a traitor and claiming I betrayed everyone by trusting Mercy. She was bleeding in front of my eyes, so much." His voice actually shook on the last couple of words, from the emotion, and the fact that even now, he didn't like the fact that there was so much blood coming from his mother's shoulder. "She wanted me to tell her what happened to her. And then when I didn't have an answer, she started yelling. Saying that all I said were lies, and claiming that by talking to Mercy, I was calling her a bad mother. That she's been raising us alone because our father abandoned us when we were born. And then she said that I follow traitors and that I think she could be walked all over... and mentioned that I think Vereux could be a traitor, and then she said I was the traitor." Anger, and even a hint of despair bit at his tone.

"All I asked was about her wound. That's all I was focused on. I just wanted her to heal. To get looked at. And then, find out what happened and then I would have just talked to her. I would have told her that the day I talked to Mercy, I was upset and angry and I was venting and that everything Mercy did was of her own volition. But I got accused of being a traitor before I even got to tell her. I got told I was doing nothing but walking all over her. That my actions obviously mean that I think she was a terrible mother.

"I want nothing to do with her, Gryphon. I want nothing to do with her, Dragon, or Kharnage. I want nothing to do with wolves that think that of me with no evidence, or a part of a pack who believes that is what they stand for. I don't. That's why I disappeared, Gryphon. Because I don't want to be anywhere near them. I don't want to ever see them again."

He didn't mean to ramble on. He truly didn't. He didn't mean for the words to spill out of his mouth, but they just spilled. They just happened. All the pent up words that he never said, all the sorrow, all the upsetness. Some of the things he hadn't even realized until he said it aloud. The theories about Mercy? they just hit him. The reason he just disappeared? It just hit him, that feeling put into words. And he'd ignored and blocked out that day when everything just... fell apart for so long, that it all just came pouring out all at once. It drained Lykos, and he sat there, quietly, not moving, not saying a thing, not doing... anything It was all drained.

"Lykos"

Gryphon sat quietly and listened to his brother's words, and his anger slowly dissolved away into bewilderment, and a troubled expression settled over his features. He was silent for a long moment after Lykos had finished speaking, before he finally looked back up, green eyes meeting blue. It was interesting, he reflected distantly, that physically they each had more in common with their other two brothers than with each other, yet before all this they'd been so close. Maybe it was because his only stake in this was protecting his family, all of his family, but Gryphon suddenly realized that he could be the only one who could actually look at this with completely rational judgement.

"I think you and our mother have more in common than you think," he said thoughtfully, then held up a paw to forestall comment. "Now hear me out. All our lives, Mom taught us that loyalty was one of the most important things. But she chose to leave Imperium and was hurt that you didn't want to follow her. Why?" He stopped a moment, staring intently at his brother. "When we were in Imperium, you were the only one of us to actually spend time with the rest of the pack. Kharnage and I were sick a lot, and Dragon was always either with Mom or sneaking off to go outside pack lands, but you actually had a mentor, and you actually spent time living in the pack. You learned loyalty too, didn't you? But it wasn't what Mom wanted you to learn. See, Mom always taught us that you should be loyal to your family -" He grinned briefly. "Hell, maybe I think that too. I'm here, after all, instead of sitting quiet in Talis like a good boy - but Imperium always put the pack first. So I think when you stayed loyal to Imperium, Mom took it personal. Like you were abandoning her, even though you were just doing what she taught us, you were being loyal, just... she couldn't see that, I think."

He tilted his muzzle up to stare reflectively at the sky. "I think maybe she made you heir because she thought she had to... buy your love back. That if you had an important position, you'd care more about Ivalice than Imperium and by extension, would love her more than Imperium." He shrugged. "I don't think Mom understood that we did love her, and that was why we were so upset over Vereux. We wanted to protect her and she thought we were just trying to get in the way of her happiness. That we were being selfish when we were just being... loyal."

"And then you found out whatever it was you did about Vereux and told someone from Imperium, the pack that she'd been trying so hard to win your love from, and I think... she took you breaking one of her rules as a personal betrayal. That's the only reason I can think of for her to jump instantly to the conclusion that you're a traitor. She went through all that trouble to birth you and raise you and make a pack for you and make you an heir and then you went off and chose Imperium over her again." He squinted at Lykos. "You follow?"

"So, then Mercy decided to do what she did, and instead of doing what she always told us to do and calm down and think before we did something stupid because we were mad, went off and did something stupid because she was mad. She stood there bleeding because she thought that's what you did to her heart and she wanted you to see what you'd done and suffer for it, because when we're mad and hurt we want other people to be hurt."

He shrugged again, and looked pained. "I'm not saying she was right. Hell, I don't think she was. I mean sure maybe punish you for breaking a rule, even if it was a damn stupid rule, but I think she went too far and left it for way too long. The punishment way exceeded any infraction. And Dragon?" He scowled blackly. "Dragon was just being a dick keeping you as a prisoner. I mean what the hell was he thinking?"

Then he hesitated thoughtfully. Actually, maybe he did know what Dragon was thinking. Dragon was thinking the way he always thought. And if he was thinking that way... "I know you don't want to have anything to do with them, but you might need to. You know Dragon. He's hot headed, and he's stubborn. He's every bit as likely to take this personally like Mom did and chances are pretty good that he's not going to leave you alone until it comes down to one of you guys being maimed or dead, and dammit, Lykos, I don't want to be in the position to have to either come between two of the people I love, or lose one or both of them. So please, just come down to Auster with me and we'll talk to Dragon together. I'll make him understand, Lykos, and then he'll let you go and you won't have to see the family ever again if you don't want to. No one has to get hurt. Not again."

His expression went stormy again, though, as another thought came to him. "I think it's fair to warn you though. I don't agree with you that Mercy was acting in your best interests. I think she was acting in her best interests and trying to drive a wedge between you and us so you'd depend on her more. I think she caused this deliberately, and that her trespassing was trying to goad Mom into fighting her. Either way she'd win, wouldn't she? Either she won and hurt Mom and could say 'look at how weak your mother is' or she'd lose and get hurt and could say 'look at what your awful mother did to me' and either way you'd have to choose between her and Mom... only she betrayed you to Mom and told her you'd been spilling Vereux's stupid secrets so that Mom would be an idiot and you couldn't choose Mom." He took a deep breath, his whole figure settling into grim lines, eyes like polished green stone. "So like I said, it's only fair to warn you. I am going to be tracking Mercy down and having a chat with her, and I will not guarantee to you that there will not be blood if it comes to it."

The moment Gryphon started speaking, Lykos' eyes darkened and he already opened his mouth to protest... only to shut it quietly, without a sound, at his brother's gesture. Alright, fine, he'd listen - and he'd try to listen without the flaming protest in his gut and an open mind. Try, anyway. Swallowing his protests, he tuned back into what his brother was saying, and he narrowed his eyes thoughtfully.

Okay, yeah, maybe, fine. Maybe Gryphon had a point. He did, however, furrow his brow when his brother through the rhetorical question in the air and stared at him. Well, he was wondering that too - loyalty was most important, yet she was hurt when he was loyal. It still bothered him. But... after a few moments, Gryphon's words started to hit him, and he found himself slowly nodding. "That... makes sense," he murmured, almost without realizing it. And it.... made him sad, rather. That two different kinds of loyalty would cause such conflict and disagreements.

But it all made sense - to him, pack was family, just as much as blood was. In fact, blood didn't determine pack, either. The torrent of thoughts was put on held though at Gryphon's grin, and Lykos snorted. Yeah, okay, maybe his brother had a point. If his brother was more loyal to pack, then he'd not be here. Of course... if his brother was loyal to pack specifically, Lykos highly doubted Gryph would have stayed in Talis. So, in a way, it would end up with his brother here, with him, in the cold north... just different means to the end, he supposed.

"She insisted she wouldn't, though." Perhaps that was immature of him, that focus on those words which were clearly so true, but it was that promise, that it would be fine, that it would be supported. And even then, he'd been conflicted, hating the fact that his mother's decision had forced him to choose - even now, in a way, it forced him to choose. And then...

Lykos' eyes widened at his brother's revelation. That he could have been made heir not because of the reasons she stated, but trying to win back his loyalty and love, like she had lost it in the first place. With everything that happened, it seemed... logical. Okay, not really - it was completely idiotic for his mother to even think of that logic, but once she was certain of something, that was it. And his brother - he was completely right. They weren't trying to stop Mom from being unhappy, they were protecting her... and doing exactly what they were raised to do.

It made him angry, but he swallowed it. This... wasn't the time to be angry, and to be reminiscing on his mother's fuck ups. Literally the whole point of them talking... well, it seemed to have the purpose of fixing things.

A flicker of confusion crossed his face as Gryphon continued, and he shook his head. Did he follow? Well, yeah, his brother's words made sense but it... it didn't connect in his brain. He couldn't grasp how one would follow that line of logic at all. He confided in a close friend... not betray the pack or whatever. "Yes... and no," he said slowly and honestly. "I understand your words, but... it just doesn't make sense." It truly confounded him, how one could... think that. Of course, it completely confused him that his mother might have thought she needed to buy Lykos' love back in the first place. Instead that, presumption... well, didn't destroy his love, but changed it into... something else. He still loved her - and a part of him always would - but he didn't want anything to do with her.

"It doesn't make sense" he reiterated moments later, when it was mentioned that his mother did indeed do exactly against what she preached - going to do a stupid thing while angry. And then, of course, Gryphon stated his opinion, and Lykos nodded. He couldn't help the dark expression that crossed his face, and he snorted at Gryphon's question. "That's pretty easy to figure," he muttered blackly. "Dragon was jealous and didn't think I deserved the heir position - whether I did or not, it matters not. But he likely only heard one side of the story and instantly assumed that it was right, and didn't even bother getting the other side of the story. He just assumed... combined that, and his anger towards me, and turned it into... this." His voice broke into a growl at the end, his ears flattening briefly before he shook his head and forced his ears to stand up again.

By that point, Gryphon was speaking again, and Lykos scowled. Yeah, Dragon definitely took it personal. He took it personal without even being there, and took it personal without even hearing both sides of the story. The anger dimmed - it didn't go away, but it dulled, as Gryphon's next words made him pause, and something unidentifiable filled him. It was somber, it was serious, and he wasn't quite sure what it was.

"Until it comes down to one of you guys being maimed or dead." Lykos grimaced. He was then assaulted with the image of being in that scenario - a confrontation between the both of them, brothers, fighting, but violently, not fun, and he realized that despite his anger, despite wanting to disassociate himself, he really didn't want to hurt his brother. He really didn't want to fight Dragon... or his mother.

He didn't want to have anything to do with them in his life again - he wanted to be able to be at peace, to find his own path, without being held back, like Mercy said, but he didn't want to hurt them.His gaze found the ground, and he sighed softly. A sliver of pain entered his voice as he spoke again, "I don't want that to happen either. I'll go." He didn't miss his brother's words, though, or the pain in them - "You'll never have to see the family ever again if you don't want to." It was clear Gryphon didn't want that to happen, but he was willing to accept it and even help it happen if it stopped the animosity and what... what was going on now.

Once again, he was pulled from his thoughts and emotions by Gryphon. This time, Lykos frowned. He could see how Gryphon came to that conclusion that Mercy was acting in her interest, and perhaps she was, but Lykos still believed the white wolf legitimately cared for him. But... he could see where his brother got that. And he could see how his brother would want to do, well, their loyal thing and track her down. Hell, if the positions were reversed... he'd probably do it too. So he didn't like it, but he'd respect it. He nodded to Gryphon. "I don't like it," he replied firmly, "but I will respect it because I understand where you are coming from. I will not stop you If I encounter her, though, I'll let her know you're coming. But I'll leave that between you two to solve." After all, that was his brother's decision. He might warn Mercy that his brother was coming, but he'd not stop Gryphon - nor would he stop Merxy, unless it was to seriously hurt Gryphon. But in a way, he was hoping that if he warned Mercy, then she'd not be as... vicious in her response as she might otherwise be.

As he said, he didn't like it - but he'd accept it. Seemed that that was the majority of his life now.

"Lykos"