Sufferin' snorkelblatz!
Once again, the boy was off on an adventure. He tried, he really did, to be good and stay where he was supposed to, but it was just so hard. The world was far too interesting and he was far too impatient. Part of him felt bad for potentially worrying his mother, but his inquisitive nature had a way of making him forget the consequences of his actions. "Psst." Jupiter froze. He spun around in search of the source of the sound. There! He spied a pair of beady eyes peeping at him from the lowest limb of a nearby tree. Loudly, he asked, "Did you 'psst' me?" "Yes," the weird critter whispered back. "Now be quiet and run, boy, you're in danger." Not believing the little monster for a second, Jupiter stayed rooted where he was and simply cocked his head. Still not whispering, he asked, "From what?" A yowl from a nearby monster answered his question. The boy's ears fell flat and he instinctively took a step backwards. Finally whispering, he asked, "W-what's that?" "That, little fella, is a mountain lion." The critter drew its tail around and dangled it down in front of him so he could see that the last quarter of it had been stripped of its hair. "And he is a mean sonofabitch." Jupiter wanted to ask what a sonofabitch was, but he didn't think the time was right. The sound of heavy paws crunching through the snow reached his ears and the boy shot a worried glance up at the little tree monster. "What's it gonna do to me?" The response was immediate and confirmed Jupiter's worst fear. "Well it was gonna eat me, so I'd wager it'd eat you too." Another yowl, this time much closer, caused the boy's head to snap around. His fearful gaze searched the forest behind him before returning to the tree monster. The monkey took pity on him and leapt from his perch. Before the boy had a chance to react the diminutive primate scaled him like a tree and came to rest on the back of his neck piggyback style. The monkey kicked at his neck. "Giddy up, little doggy. I'll lead you ou-" An angry scream interrupted the monkey and announced the arrival of the mountain lion. With a terrified yelp Jupiter took off running. He didn't know what to do; he'd only ever fought imaginary monsters. The only thing he could think of was running. It was his only chance. "Run, boy!" "Jupiter" "Amadeus" "You" |
NOTE: this character is pretty on the outside but nothing but ugliness and innuendo on the inside. It's best to consider all threads with him rated 'M' regardless of the official tags.