It had been a vary long healing process and the older male seemed to loose track of time in the process. After his fight and seeing the Abraxas move away from the lands, Vern had stuck around. Once more he was back to square one which frustrated and angered the old man to no end. There was also the fact that Zephyr had fled leaving his comrade to take the fall without any aid. Luckily the rest of the young boys hadn't jumped in, but in a way Vern wish the would have. If they would have killed him he wouldn't still be here living alone, feeling bitter, and becoming nasty. These changes only added to the bitterness that was still in him from the last pack takeover the day he had lost everything to keep him going. Though he was a coward and would never be able to attempt suicide. To add to the bitterness dwelling within him he no longer had much of a life and there was no way now that he could ever have children or get the joys of settling with a family, at least those were his opinions. He had lost his chance and there was no other chances in his life. All he wanted to do was be killed to be by her side once more, to be able to finally tell her how he feels. The fact he wanted to die made him more reckless since the fight. Even though he was reclusive, if anyone dared to approach him he would be daring and confrontational secretly hoping someone would just up and kill him. Grunting in stiffness the male got up from his meal, licking the blood from his grizzled chin. He was looking his age and feeling it for sure. The brown in his coat was now grizzled with white, his form skinny and his fur messy. He wasn't extremely thin like some would get, but with his age it was harder to keep the weight on himself. His left eye was now gone and more scars now riddled his muzzle. He was an old man and without the help of a healer his body was really feeling older then he was. He moved on a more staggered manner, his once swift fluid moments now getting sloppy with arthritis. Moving away from his small kill he made his way back to his den, the same den that he had been in when the pack was thriving. No one was left and he didn't leave to seek others out. Instead he chose to suffer in his reclusive nature and become similar to a grumpy old badger. He was tired from his hunt, tired from the lack of real sleep, so he crawled into his den and curled up wanting to try and sleep a bit to recharge himself. What else was there to do anyway? "Inverno Talk", & 'Inverno Think'

Staying in Abaven was going surprisingly well for Zephyr and his family. At first, the elder male had been skeptical, but time had proven him wrong - not that he'd openly admit that. It was a decent pack, quiet enough that he hoped it wouldn't drawn attention, and a decent place for Caelestis to grow. Not many troublemakers, that he could see, and enough older wolves that would gladly keep an eye on her through all her mischief. He was grateful to hear nothing more of the Abraxas, and though he promised he would only run from them again if it was the absolute last option, he fully intended to keep that open as an option if they decided to return. One thing that seemed to be bothering Caelum, though, was the absence of Inverno. He'd been scolded thoroughly over leaving him to fight, but then again... it was his fault for not running right along with him. Wasn't like I would've stopped him from running behind me, he thought bitterly to himself as he wandered the lands surrounding Abaven. Still, it worried Caelum that he might not have fared well from the fight.. and Zephyr would be a fool to argue with her. At least it earned him an afternoon to himself.. not that he particularly enjoyed time away from his family. After so many years away from Caelum he didn't exactly crave alone time, and he loved Caelestis too much to ever honestly want a break from her, even if she did exhaust him both physically and emotionally sometimes. His thoughts were mostly on his family as he wove through the expanse of willow trees. His nose twitched as he sniffed at the ground - finally catching on to a familiar scent. Damn, the old man was still alive? He supposed Inverno had similar sentiments about him, though. Huffing slightly to himself, he grabbed hold of the scent and followed it to the source. It wasn't all that surprising, when he finally saw Inverno, that he looked terrible - emaciated and unwell, and not at like he'd been taking care of himself. For fuck's sake, Vern, he thought to himself, frowning as he barked out a greeting and made to approach as he slunk into what looked like a den. As he drew closer, it become more apparent that his state was even worse than he'd originally anticipated. What the hell had happened to his eye? His brow furrowed as he gave him a good look over. "I see you made it out in once piece," Zephyr shot him gruffly as he stopped at the mouth of his makeshift den, peering inside. "Er.. mostly." His words weren't completely unkindly, but they were certainly far from cordial. Caelum had only ask that he look for Inverno, not that he treat him as though he was his best friend - so Zephyr had great liberty in acting however the hell he wanted to. Within reason, of course. "Talk" "You" Think

He was wrapped in his thoughts that the bark that Zeph had left out didn't register as he retreated to his den. In his mind they had all forgotten him, they all didn't care. Seeing a wolf that used to be such a strong influence and someone he actually looked up to, turn tail and run leaving him at the mercy of the giant family had been the last straw. The last crippling blow to his pride and mentality that manifested into dark shadows. When Vern first reunited with Cealum, the fact that both of them shared the fact they grieved over loved ones actually helped him to feel like there was hope. It helped him move on and get past what chance he had lost. He found companionship in sticking around Cealum, but Zeph had returned. He did not blame them for getting things sorted out and to rekindle their fire for one another, but jealousy made him look at Zeph in a new way.

He was moving in a sloppy circle, just getting ready before the familiar voice made his attention snap towards the entrance of his den. His hair immediately stood on end as all at once the emotions came shattering back to the surface. His face contorted something between a grimace and a snarl. If anyone would come looking for him he had been hoping it would be Cealum. He just didn't want to deal with seeing the male's face once again, to painfully remember the fact that Zeph once again had everything Inverno desired to have. He huffed at Zeph's words before trying to quickly confront the male, but with his lack of fluid movement he thumped back and forth as he moved. Through the darkness he came and stopped when his nose was inches from Zeph's nose. His lips peeled back and his ears lowered.

He allowed Zeph the time to back up and when he did Vern crawled the rest of the way from his den, lips still peeled back in silent reply to Zeph's words. Zeph's body condition looked vary good for his age, which only made Vern's mood even more sour.

"Now you show some concern, where the hell did that go when you ran leaving me at the mercy of those damn young idiots," he hissed his eye narrowing as all the mixed emotions began to battle against him.


"Talk." & 'Think'

In an ideal world, Zephyr wasn't sure how Inverno would react. It wouldn't be completely surprising if he lashed at him physically as well as verbally, though as soon as he realized that the other male was in no condition to fight he figured it wasn't very likely he'd bother. Pain was something both of them had endured - and they both knew physical pain was nowhere near as crippling as emotional pain could be. Why waste the energy, anyway? His nose wrinkled a bit deeper as Vern finally turned to see him, his movements not as steady as they once would have been. Not that his old, obviously aging self had much room for judgement.. Instinctively his own muzzle twisted into a snarl, brows furrowing tightly together, his teeth bared. He'd come to find him, after all, and this was the treatment he got? No wonder he's been single all these years. Ungrateful ugly bastard. Seeing the snarl was enough reason to cause Zephyr to take a few long strides backwards. He'd been tasked to find Inverno, and nothing more. He supposed the inviting him part was presumed, but he wasn't going to drag him home by the scruff like he might a lost puppy.  "Concern?" He scoffed, somewhat incredulously, a snort echoing off the trees that surrounding them.  "Weird. Didn't know this was what concern looked like. I'd say it looks more like... obligation?" His snarl softened slightly into something that looked more like a frown. Did he need to explain himself to Inverno? No, he really didn't. And yet letting him have the final word in the matter seemed oddly like admitting defeat, so he wouldn't concede. Not yet, at least.  "At least we can agree on that point. They WERE damn idiots. That's putting it lightly. But you're not much better, you know, trying to pick a fight with whelps who's parents you're likely old enough to be the father of!" Not that he was any younger, but surely Inverno knew he'd been both outnumbered and easily outmatched by those Abraxas youth. Neither of them were getting any younger, and he'd be a fool to risk anything over the well-being of his family.  "Was following the scent of my girls that night, you know. I know damn well you'd chase both of them instead of trying to save my ass, so don't pretend otherwise." Was that a low blow? Maybe. But it was true, and the way his eyes narrowed made it clear that he wasn't totally comfortable with that fact either. "Talk" "You" Think

He flopped his rump to the ground with a grunt as Zeph began to speak, his words taking more of a blow to Vern's already fragmented mind. After everything his once great alpha still didn't give a damn about him. Everything Vern had gone through to do his duty for that man and Cealum and Zeph still couldn't show him any ounce of respect. His ears flattened at the words his lips peeling back more as the darkness of his mind began to toy with him again. Why not tussle with Zeph, find out who truly is better at fighting and put him in his place so him that Vern was worth respecting and worth being concerned over. It was a highly tempting idea and if Zeph ended up killing him then that was a plus also. Either way Vern would win and it seemed like the best idea his mind had thought of in a long time.

Then Zeph started again, this time bringing up the fact that Vern's decision had been a bad one, which Vern was well aware of, but honestly at the time he had nothing to loose. His muscles loosened and his lips fell back over his teeth as his eye stared at Zeph's face. Then came the low blow which frazzled his mind further and the snarl on his face came right back, this time more menacing then the last one. A snarl ripped through his vocals as his remaining eye narrowed dangerously.

"You think that's how things really are?!" He stood as he spoke a little wobbly at first, but he balanced himself. "Whether you realize it or not my loyalty never falters, you were once my alpha if you remember and the only thing close to family I have. Whether you or I like it or not I would never turn my back on you or Cealum!"

Stepping towards the male he snarled again his eye wild now with emotions. He was cracking under the weight of everything that had been pent up over the years.

"If that doesn't ease your mind then maybe Cealum forgot to tell you. I LOST my world too the day the pack was attacked. I got to see her mangled form, ripped to shreds and blood splattered all over the ground. Hell I even got to see her entrails ripped out like she was some garbage prey. I lost Ilona and my only chance of ever having what you have so pardon me if I feel a little jealous that you have everything I ever wanted and all I get to do is waste away in this hell hole," He snapped.

He closed the distance between them with his hackles raised to the heavens. His claws digging into the ground and his eye glazed over with emotion.


"Talk." & 'Think'

Caelum didn't know right away what Zeph was doing when she followed after him. Mostly, she knew he was leaving the pack lands and that it was her turn to sneakily trail after him for once! The day was pretty peaceful so far, birds chirping, summer heat a bit milder than it had been a few days ago thanks to light breeze and sparse cloud cover. Yeah, it was pretty nice out all in all. What's a beautiful day without someone to spoil it, though? First, there was the fact that Zephyr's scent lead her straight back into the old Dragoste territory. She hesitated at what used to be the border, feeling a sense of discomfort and anxiety come over her as she finally entered the willows. It somehow felt both like just days, and entire years might have passed since the Abraxas took Dragoste. Shaking off the muddled emotions, she pressed on. The first thing to greet her upon reentry into the lands they briefly called home? The voices of two men - unfortunately not strangers - engaged in a bit of a shouting match. It sounded anything but friendly, and Caelum was quick to race toward the sound before things got out of hand. Leave it to those two to get into it the damn second they laid eyes on each other. Honestly, how'd they ever co-exist in a pack together before? You'd never have guessed that they once did by the way they sounded. Sweeping her way in, Caelum immediately placed herself between the males, ears erect, tail raised, and lips pulled back as she growled, "ENOUGH!" This was the first time since the fall of their original pack that Caelum had held herself this way and spoken with such commanding authority. Faint as it was, a glimmer of the woman she once was - a force to be reckoned with, in her prime - showed as stood barring the way for the argument to continue. She didn't hear much of what they'd said, but she didn't need to. Lifting her head the woman glanced between the riled up males assuring that they both saw the look in her crystalline eyes. No more damn arguing or so help me... Once satisfied there would be no protest, Caelum pulled back a bit so she could look at both of them as she spoke, "Now, if you're both good and done burning whatever bridges might have remained between you I'd kindly ask that you keep things civil or I'll gladly fight both of your sorry asses until you're done with this crap." Her tail flicked irritably as she scowled at them in a manner akin to how she might look at Caelestis when she was behaving poorly. A wry expression found it's way onto her features as she shook her head. "It would be delightful to stumble on a tame conversation once. What happened, hm?" A brow lifted as she turned to Zeph and huffed in an exasperated manner, "We discussed finding him, if I remember correctly. Not fighting with him." With that, she waited for them to explain themselves and whatever they'd been doing that led to them standing toe to toe. Perhaps in her youth she'd have tried to smooth it over gently, but Cae was more or less an old crone now so she figured she got a yelling and scolding pass. If they tried going at it again she was likely to make good on her threats. "Speak"

Maybe he was wrong. Maybe Inverno wouldn't have been selfish enough to leave him and go looking for his girls. But the sudden rage that started to churn inside him made rational thoughts that much more difficult. It seemed easier than ever now, blinded by all these feelings, to see his former packmate as an enemy and nothing else. It'd been a long while since Zephyr had fallen captive to years of misplaced feelings, but it felt like it was happening again, and he was at the mercy of those waves of emotion. The male mirrored Inverno's snarl, his lips curling upward in a threatening expression and the growl that rumbled within his throat growing a bit louder.  "As if I could forget any of that," he snapped back quickly at Inverno's suggestion he might not remember how things had been once. It didn't seem to matter, in his mind, how things had been so long ago.. but how they had turned out. It mattered how he felt when he thought about how everything was now. His words, the description of his mate's death, sent Zephyr's mind spiraling even deeper. As if he didn't know loss! He'd seen the bodies of his children mangled that day, easily the worst thing he had ever experienced. Over time, after so many years, he'd learned that not all of them had perished that day. Though that realization had been a joy beyond his wildest dreams, it hadn't made the pain lessen any. And Inverno's words only made him sink back to that dark place, the years he'd lived on his own afterward, letting his rage boil and fester beneath the surface. Just as he was about to speak, somewhere nearby he heard the shuffling of paws as someone approached. Zephyr's instinct was to bristle at whoever was heading toward him, but the voice was familiar and it took him only a moment to realize who it was. Caelum? Why had she followed him here? The frown remained, though his expression softened. He deflated quite visibly, like a balloon that all the air had been left out of, even his posture sinking as though a physical weight was not pressing on his form. Keep things civil? Yeah, sure, whatever. He snorted as he turned away from Inverno slightly, though his gaze was held away from his mate. He hoped he didn't look too much like a puppy being scolded, but he figured it must at least resemble it, as it sure felt remarkably similar to that. "I'll be civil alright," he mumbled under his breath, shaking his head. "I did say I'd find him, and if he hadn't opened his damn mouth I would've happily shown him to Abaven right away." In silence, he thought to add bitterly, but decided against it. He wouldn't continue on with Inverno, and wouldn't try to press his luck too much with Caelum either. He wondered if this habit she'd gotten into of scolding him was going to become commonplace now.. "Talk" "You" Think

Things were so close to breaking, so close to them lunging at each other in a brawl. He was in fact anticipating it, the dark thoughts swirling within his mind. There was no doubt that Zeph could easily over power him, maybe even kill him. That thought excited him, to end the torment he was in and to finally gained the peace he so desired. It was enough for him to want to push Zeph's buttons, push him over the edge. If he hadn't so foolishly spilled his guts about Ilona he could have used Zephyr's jealousy to his advantage though now it was way too late for that. They were so close that Vern could smell Zeph's breath and it seemed like hours passed by when it was mere minutes. Then suddenly Cealum appeared out of no where, inserting herself in between the two males and making Vern whirl back away from her.

Her tone and her orders made his ears flatten against his head. She was taking charge of the situation and making her feelings known. That look in her eyes made him suddenly not want to look at her. Lips fell to cover his teeth and he flopped onto his rump. He held no beef with Cealum so there was no reason to be nasty with her. Though his gold eye zeroed in on Zeph again as he spoke to Caelum, but soon looked away glaring at the ground beside his paws. He didn't know the reason they had come back into his life and it left him feeling confused. A wave of exhaustion began to settle over him as his hormones settled and his muscles relaxed. He felt as though he could sleep right now as he sat.

Standing the scrawny man shook himself out attempting to get some blood pumping and to stir his body into complete alertness instead of half sleepy. His ears heard Zeph say he would have taken him back to Abaven, is that where they lived now? Mind tried to focus on that, to memorize. He wasn't sure even before him and Zeph were at each other if he would willingly leave. Wallowing in his sorrow, lack of sleep, and his darker thoughts had become his normal and to change that now he would be reluctant to do. Somewhere deep down he felt like he deserved to suffer, he didn't know why though.


"Talk." & 'Think'

After her chastising both men seemed to settle, though it was probably reluctant at best at least they weren't about to rip into one another anymore. That was a start, right? Her ears fell back as she shook her head woefully at the both of them and fell back onto her haunches with a sigh. To Zephyr's response she huffed, "Self control is not a bad thing you know. That goes for both of you. Taking the high road is never not an option." Honestly her words sounded more tired than mad now. Glancing between the two men Caelum tried to think of a way to get them to behave in each others' presence but she didn't really see what she could do. It pained her, but, maybe these stubborn old fools were just hopeless. She lifted her head, gazing skyward and watching a squirrel leap through the branches of one of the willows for a long moment. Turning back to Vern, her face softened considerably as she shook off the frustration from before. "Believe it or not the intent behind finding you was to make sure you were okay. We joined a pack called Abaven. If you need healing of any sort or a place to rest I'm sure the alpha wouldn't mind us bringing you by. If you're interested, that is." For a moment she almost said they joined Abaven after Dragoste fell, but easily omitted that bit. It felt a bit touchy to bring up so offhand. Turning back to Zeph she would stand and pad closer so she could aim to lightly bump her head against his neck. Hopefully the interaction could help keep him from tensing again. Looking back to Vern with a small smile, Cae said softly, "I, uhm. I'm glad you made it, Vern. I was worried." "Speak"

Despite his anger being visibly stifling at Caelum's arrival, it took much longer for his heartbeat to even begin to slow. Internally he was still writing in frustration - years of emotions seemed to surface now, all at once, and the jealousy that he still harbored over the brief period of time that Inverno had spent with his mate seemed to grate at his nerves even more fiercely now. Most of his energy now was channeled into raising Caelestis and keeping her out of trouble, and he had grown used to the easy and familiar way that he and Caelum worked together. These feelings had been a long time coming, but just as quickly as they surfaced they were pushed back down again - and he wasn't sure if he felt relieved or restless over the way his feelings were suddenly stifled. For now, he would simmer quietly with those feelings, blinking as he tried to force his more irritating thoughts away. 'Taking the high road is never not an option,' Caelum reminded him, and his ears flattened tight against his skull. No, it was never not an option... but it wasn't necessarily always the best option, either. He knew that just as well. But he knew arguing would be a losing battle for him, so he merely grunted in soft acknowledgement. It was no surprise when she invited Inverno to Abaven, as he had known she would if either of them ever found their old packmate again, but that didn't make him any less unimpressed by it. His eyes narrowed, though he avoided Inverno's gaze as he waited for his answer. Would he come with them, or was he fine on his own? Truthfully, he looked like shit, though Zephyr knew as the saying went, you could drag a horse (or in this case, a wolf) to water but you couldn't make him drink. Perhaps Inverno didn't want the help. Regardless, it wasn't up to Zephyr - he'd do whatever Cae needed of him, however begrudgingly, though the gentle touch of her nose to his neck helped calm his frazzled spirits slightly. "Talk" "You" Think

He sat himself down easy, now that some blood was pumping he wasn't feeling as exhausted as before. Ears perked as Cealum again spoke, he supposed she was right. It had been hard to hold everything back, being alone for so long have left Zeph his target to take everything out on. Not that it was entirely Zeph's fault. His gaze lowered to the ground for a brief moment before it flicked back up to Cealum as she spoke to him directly. Ears perked as he listened, she confirmed that the lived in Abaven. He had no clue where that was, but it had been some sort of pack. He didn't need any healing at this time, his wounds were healed and there was no help for the eye he was blind in. Besides if he went with them to this new place what would happen. He would be back to square one and invading on Zeph and her's personal life. Each pack they had been in together had failed horribly and maybe he was part of the reason why. Maybe he was just being an old fool.

"No that's okay I'm healed up now and honestly I don't think I could handle getting introduced to another pack, another group of faces," he said with a light shake of his head.

He would just live out the rest of his days alone, so that he wouldn't explode like he had with Zephyr. He didn't need to fallow them and completely tarnish what was left of his relationship with them.

"I appreciate both of you seeking me out," he said though avoided both of their gaze. He felt like a fool with how he acted, but he did feel some of it needed to be said.


"Talk." & 'Think'