So much had changed. The lands had been ravaged in their time cloistered on the islands. There were pathways that had been cut through the plains of lava - now black rock. They mostly bordered the edges near the rapids but it made no less painful to see. The landscape was inescapably different, just like the landscape of the pack and her life. Shaye was dead and Abaven was hers to carry. Rhyme helped as much as he could, but she could tell Shaye's death had stunned him in ways that the young girl couldn't comprehend. How could she? She'd never loved anyone like that; not in a way that cut deeper and transcended familial bonds.

She was scouting the territory in preparation of relocating the pack. The skies had cleared enough and they were too large to remain on Ibis for much longer. It just wasn't sustainable. Theory sighed and looked up at the grey spring sky. Part of her hoped for a piercing blue and sunny rays, but she knew that would be a long time coming. Maybe they'd get blue skies come summertime.

Prey hadn't quite returned. Small mice and voles, maybe, but she couldn't spot any larger animals. The acrid smell of ash and volcanic soil covered everything. Even if there was a deer a few hundred yards away, she wouldn't have been able to smell it. Cussing quietly, Theory continued on her harried patrol. The plains was the most inhabitable of their former lands. She hoped it would set some of the pack wolves at ease - if you cocked your head just right, you could hear the burble of the distant rapids.

No matter how she looked at it, everything was different. There would be no going back. Theory stuffed her emotions down deeper as she felt something dark and painful well up between the cracks of her heart. Shaye was dead. Tana was dead. Her sisters were scattered and hurt and she hadn't seen Noir in seasons - for all she knew, black sheep though he was, he'd also been savaged by the volcano. Theo gulped and turned her head to the sky, cursing the bleak weather again. What would she have to do for a little sunshine?

They'd fallen out of God's graces. That was the only possible explanation that made sense for any of this, Thalia Abraxas was certain of i. The volcano's eruption hadn't quite touched them all the way in Auster, but in a direct way, but its indirect effects had been far-reaching and Thalia wondered if there was anywhere in the world that hadn't felt the world tremble, that couldn't see the heavy plumes of ash and smoke that still billowed into the sky. Some days seemed clearer than others, with bits of sunlight struggling to permeate the ash clouds, but some seemed frighteningly desolate and bleak. Spring was here at last, but the weather often still felt bitter-cold and sometimes she found herself wondering if things would ever go back to normal ever again. Normal seemed so far behind her. Her parents were gone - after the incident at the volcano her father had seemed to think there was a family mission that he needed to go on with her mother - and her siblings were nowhere to be found. Dion had been gone for longer than she wanted to admit, and while her relationship with her strange brother Saren had been blossoming, despite all their differences... it seemed he, too, had disappeared. It was hard to shake the feeling that she was completely and utterly adrift, floating like a spec of dust on the wind. Some of Risen remained, but even the wolves she'd grown familiar with seemed few and far between. They were aimless; once their Empire had felt strong and grounded, and now she felt like they were little more than a band of rogues with no purpose or meaning. Their existence suddenly felt meaningless and without purpose and Thalia wondered if God had known that for longer than they had. Was their crumbled Empire a punishment? She'd known she always needed to do better, to be better. Better than her parents, better than the mortals that walked this plane alongside them. She was young, but she had utterly failed. She remembered her last meeting with Theory, remembering being scoffed at for doing so little while Theory was training to rule one of Boreas's oldest packs. Surely the Abraxas weren't being scorned for her personal failures, but their failures as a whole, but the punishment felt oddly personal. Thalia knew she needed to use it as an excuse to grow stronger, to prove her faith until it was unquestionable to everyone who knew her - but how could she do that on her own? She felt she had so much left to learn from those that had left, and she wasn't sure she could do it all on her own. Aimlessly moping around in the Runestones wasn't enough. She'd hoped Pyrrhic would have the answers she couldn't seem to find, but unlike Malleus he seemed to have no vision for their future. God didn't speak to him, or if he did he certainly didn't share it. There was a weird, vast emptiness there and she couldn't help but feel uneasy at not knowing what came next. A journey to Boreas, toward the volcano itself, surely would give her answers.. right? The smoke that spewed from the volcano had settled as the weeks drew on, until eventually Thalia decided a journey there was safe. She was no longer a child, after all, and didn't need permission to come and go as she pleased. She'd long since filled out her gangly form, and now resembled her father much more than her mother; her build was much stockier and heavier now, on the larger end of the spectrum compared to most average wolves. So much had changed since her last visit this way, though this time she was going further north than before. Toward the east was the island that the Firefly Festival had been held on, which now felt like so long ago, when things had been simpler. The closer she got Mount Volkan, the worse things got. This land had once been a vast, green field - she could see it now, despite having never visited, even under all the ash and soot - but it had transformed into something else. The stench in the air was like nothing she'd experienced before, and while it wasn't quite stifling, it was hard to pick much else out from the smell. Any old pack borders here were all but disappeared, quenched by the volcano's permeating smell. But there was one scent, the scent of something fresh, that piqued her interest. In the past it would've brought her a sense of annoyance, but through all the negative emotions that Theory brought out in her, there was a surprising sense of relief. She was alive - honestly Thalia hadn't been sure, knowing she lived out this way. Part of her hadn't even known she'd feared for her death until she confirmed she had succumbed to that fate, and all at once she felt as though some weird weight had been lifted from her shoulders. There was something constant in her life, after all, even if it was this far from home, even if it wasn't quite the constant she wanted. It was something. She wouldn't dare let her relief show. Surely Theory would just let it go to her head, and she didn't need any help in that department. Instead, she let a faint sneer touch her lips as she continued to prowl through the plains in search of her, occasionally letting out a bark and hoping that the other woman might hear her.

She hadn't expected to hear any noise here. So many animals had scattered and left the plains behind that the soft bark of a familiar wolf rolled across the empty terrain like thunder. Theory's ears twitched and she turned, trying to pin down a figure to match the sound. Thalia. Her heart caught in her throat. Immediately she felt foolish for how she'd behaved last time they'd met - she had been so young and naive, even though it was only a scarce few months ago. Everything had changed.

Theory changed her course and made a beeline for the Abraxas. Although she held her head and tail high to signal her position in these lands, it was a mere formality. There wasn't a hint of malice or brag to the gesture - after a winter of patrolling Ibis, the stance had become second nature.

"Thalia," she said warmly, so glad to see a familiar face. The Abraxas girl had filled out since they'd last met and she carried her adult frame well. Theory dipped her head briefly to greet someone who she considered a good friend - even if their interactions from the past few seasons were childish and confusing. There was no pretense left, it had all been chiseled away. All that was left was a genuine affection and a strange excitement at seeing her again that Theory couldn't quite pin down.

Plenty of questions pinged in her brain. "Are you safe?" she asked first, her brows furrowed. "Did the volcano effect you in the deep south?" Theo had been so wrapped up in keeping Abaven safe during the eruption that she hadn't given much thought to the impact it might have had on other packs. "Are you... alright?" she added softly. There must be a reason that she came this far into Boreas.

It wasn't long before she caught a glimpse of Theory, and slowly she turned to face her, moving slowly to close what little distance remained between them. Her own posture was far less confrontational than any time they'd met before. These lands weren't ones she was familiar and she knew she had no place here. What she'd wanted was to see if being closer to the volcano might bring her answers. She'd never heard the voice of God, not like some of the elder Abraxas had claimed to, but maybe this might help her find answers. So far, it had only led her to Theory. "Theory," she returned the simple greeting easily. Her voice was lower now, no longer touched with the childish tone it'd had upon their last meeting, and was faintly hoarse from not being used. She had no one to really talk to, not lately; her siblings and parents all seemed to be gone, and she often found it hard to connect to those left in the Empire. It felt weirdly comforting to see Theory again - hell, she'd even been glad to see her when Theory had called her for no good reason, though the enjoyment had been mixed with a weird irritation. It'd been hard to reconcile the mixed emotions, but now she felt none of that former annoyance. It was hard to deny she was sad, though she hoped that heaviness didn't sneak through into this interaction. "I'm fine," she started, after a long moment of hesitation. Physically, she was okay. Mentally, she was less well, and spiritually she was a mess. She felt lonely - not in the simple sense of being alone, but in a much deeper, more existential way that was hard for her yearling brain to grasp. "Not really. Just the ash and some tremors, but.. not like here." Theory seemed okay on the exterior, but Thalia couldn't help but wonder if anyone had been hurt that she knew. "Our leader was out this way when it all started, though. He's gone," she explained, as clinically as she could muster. The Empire felt as though it had crumbled, and she hoped somehow Pyrrhic might find a way to pick up the pieces. But she couldn't tell Theory all that, not when she'd insulted her own role in her pack the last time they'd met. Sure, maybe they'd both changed and the air between them felt lighter now, but it was hard to forget the bragging and how it'd made Thalia feel. Not that it matter anymore, not really. "We've moved a bit futher from where we were living before, but.. I'm not sure what we're going to do now. We're figuring it out." But enough about that. She found it hard to imagine Theory would understand her losses - she didn't know how wrong she was, with all the other female had gone through this last season. "What about you.. and your pack? Are you okay?" Expressing concern felt weird, given their past meetings, but she was truly curious and cared if she was faring well - even if she was a mortal.

I'm fine. A rush of relief that she hadn't expected flooded through her veins. It was hot and cold at the same time - the strangest sensation. As this feeling overwhelmed her she gave Thalia her full attention, blue eyes widening when she mentioned that their own leader had perished in the eruption. "I'm sorry," she said earnestly, her own voice heavy as lead. That was one thing she could understand, maybe better than anyone. Thalia's words cut her to the core and brought her own loss to the forefront of her mind. Blinking back tears, she looked away and inadvertently back towards Shaye's grave. Had they both lost their leaders? Someone they'd looked up to and trusted had been brutally erased by a careless act of god.

"It changes everything, doesn't it?" She said, her eyes shining with unspent tears. I'm not sure what we're going to do. Oh, she felt that felt right down to her bones. What were they going to? The landscape of their world had been rocked and splintered. How did you even go about rebuilding this kind of mess? Maybe Shaye would have had answers, but Theory didn't.

"Abaven is well... I'm," Theory's voice broke and she bowed her head, embarrassed. The pageantry of her arrival was swept away, what little of it there had been. Tears slipped from her eyes and the cold spring air licked her cheeks cold. "My mother and our former alpha is dead," she croaked, unable to keep a whimper slipping from between her teeth, no matter how hard she tried to choke it down. There, it was over. She'd turned her insides out in front of her and Thalia could choose to react however she'd like. Shaye's death was too painful to keep a secret, even to a stranger. Theo had spent so long trying to remain strong for everyone else that it felt like a relief to finally let go.

Thalia hadn't expected an apology. Why was she apologizing? She had nothing to do with it. While some blamed their God, Thalia felt they only had themselves to blame. And while she knew she was merely expressing sympathy, it was hard to reconcile that notion with her own beliefs about why Malleus and Archon had perished. "Death is part of life," she replied slowly, matter-of-factly, though her measured tone said it all - that beneath her facade she, too, was struggling and was terrified to show even a glimpse of her pain. Her parents might be dead, or might not be, but the fact that they hadn't replied to Pyrrhic's call when she needed them most told her they must be. "We.. have to use it to move forward. To learn from." Was she merely repeating things that had been taught to her, reciting lines she'd heard from meetings in the past? Thalia really didn't know anymore, and it was hard to believe those things herself. She sighed at Theory's admission that everything had changed, and as soon as the sound left her lips and Theory started to answer her she realized tears were beginning to spill down her cheeks. Thalia didn't let her gaze stray for a moment, watching curious as the emotion built up in her voice as well as in her expression. "I'm sorry... too," she offered tentatively. It seemed they were suffering in similar ways, and all at once she felt guilty for thinking Theory wouldn't understand. Their God was a wrathful, angry God and she'd grown up being taught just that, and it seemed He had no qualms about who he took down when he was feeling vengeful. Even Theory and her family had suffered. Her instinct was to shy away from such a blatant display of emotion that suddenly seemed to overwhelm Theory. Emotion was something she thought of as weak, as lesser... a symptom of mortals, no doubt. But it was hard to not empathize with her, despite everything she believed. Already she'd envisioned what Malleus's death must have been lucked, and imagining her parents succumbing to a similar fate was unpleasant at best - and downright agonizing at worst. She realized then that she had furrowed her brows slightly, averting her gaze away from Theory. Her pain wasn't what made Thalia uncomfortable, but her reaction to it was what bothered her. She almost felt envious of the way she could let herself so openly feel, in a way Thalia wondered if she ever could. Even her own parents' departure hadn't made her cry, but instead left a grating hollowness deep in her chest. Slowly, almost against the force of her own body, she moved to sit near Theory as she fell silent. "What now?" She asked, after a moment. "I mean.. for you, and your pack," Thalia clarified quickly, as if her first question could be misconstrued, and in her head she sort of had been - wondering why things between her and Theory seemed so different now, and wondering why her grief was so difficult for her to process.

While she supposed Thalia was technically correct, she couldn't shake off the distinct sense that this all was terribly unfair. She hadn't been raised with any particular kind of faith or religion - death seemed a brutal finality. A cessation of all being. Once you died, you were lost to all those you loved and left behind. "I could have learned more from her if she was still alive," Theo said bitterly, her voice low and sullen. She could tell from Thalia's halting tone that the girl wasn't even sure if she meant her own words - it was a small comfort. How could anyone feel confident in the face of their inevitable mortality? I'm sorry... too. Relief rushed through her veins, hot like adrenaline. It felt good to hear someone voice their sympathy, even Thalia's stilted and awkward words. Theory could tell that this kind of conversation didn't come easily to the Abraxas, which made her appreciate the sentiment all the more; not everyone was as in tune with their own emotions. It ran in the family, evident from Rhyme's fractured psyche in the face of Shaye's death. They were all so terribly in tune that they were drowning in their grief. Thalia felt like a brief respite from the storm of churning, ugly emotions. She leaned against the smaller female as she came to sit next to her. Theory could almost rest her head on top of Thalia's but she resisted the familiar urge. The same intimacies didn't exist here that she shared with family and pack members - they had to carefully created, she guessed. There was no telling what might cause Thalia to draw away, but Theo hoped that she might stay by her side for a little longer. This feeling was different from pressing close to Poem or her father; an undercurrent of static or some other kind of electricity seemed to flow between them. By sitting next to her, Thalia had closed the circuit and activated the current. "Now we... rebuild?" Theo replied, her self-doubt evident. "We've half returned to our former lands, but honestly, I only came back to bury my mother - and provide some kind of familiarity for everyone else. I think we needed that much," She paused to reflect. Serpent Plains just wasn't the same as it used to be and the nearby rapids had slowed significantly. Was it home she was chasing or the ghost of happier memories from long ago? "Honestly, I want to leave this place. Get as far away from that fucking mountain as possible. But it's not just about me anymore, it's about all of Abaven." It felt good to cuss. Sometimes she felt like she wasted more energy than she ought to on being nice and polite; lately she just didn't have enough left over to care. "Speech"

As a yearling, Thalia had anticipated that she'd have all of this figured out by now. Part of her wished she could feel the way that Pyrrhic and some of the others did about the loss of their leader and the rubble he'd left in his wake. Pretending that this was simply something that had happened didn't give her any sense of relief, because she just didn't believe it. Somehow it felt painfully fair, a reminder of the way the Abraxas had strayed from the God, and a reminder of how little she herself had done despite being fully able to serve her God as He surely expected her to. She couldn't lean on her parents forever, and now that they were gone she growing even more painfully aware of that. "I know," she replied simply. She still felt Malleus had plenty of wisdom he could've imparted on the pack if he'd had more time, and likewise if her father had stuck around longer surely he could've given her more guidance. Thalia realized she was holding her breath then, and let out a low sigh. Her breath only stabilized as she moved to sit near Theory, her presence strangely comforting even despite the way she felt her own body grow tense as Theory leaned into her. The contact seemed so natural, and yet the way she allowed herself to lean back into Theory's touch felt somehow contrived. It'd been a long while since she'd laid against either of her parents, and even with her siblings she'd never shown much outward affection. This was completely foreign to her, and she was hyper-aware of just how uncomfortable she was, fearing Theory might notice. The possibility of her pulling away seemed equally as nerve-wracking as the thought that she might move closer, and Thalia couldn't comprehend why both options seemed uncomfortable in their own respects. Instead of pressing closer or pulling away, she simply stayed still.. impossibly, painfully still, listening to Theory explain what she'd been up to. "I came out this way.. sort of hoping I might find some hint of my parents here. Or either of my siblings." Imagining Dion going after their parents seemed a likely possibility in her mind, but she couldn't come up with any world where Saren would've gone so far from home, and the not knowing was hard for her to come to terms with. "I don't blame you for wanting to leave. Not at all." She knew she needed change - hanging around in the same space, doing nothing, seemed like the worst possible solution. "Part of me wants to start somewhere new, too. I wish our leader had a clearer vision of what he's going to do. I trust him, but..." But maybe she shouldn't. Thalia really wasn't sure who she ought to trust to lead them anymore, but she was beginning to realize she had to take control of her own future, regardless of what happened with the Empire.

Thalia seemed uncomfortable with their closeness but she couldn't tell if it was personal fault or if she wasn't used to this kind of contact. Judging from her general stiffness, Theory cut herself some slack and decided it was the latter. They had overcome their childishness, right? Theo sure felt like an adult - the crushing weight of reality bore down on her every moment. She had figured that this was just the general malaise of being an adult. Rhyme's attitude lately was beginning to make a lot of sense. There was no going back from here. Instead, she took comfort in the physical connection she was making with Thalia. If she could force herself so far into the present moment that she forgot about the future or the past... well, that might be the balm her soul needed. Taking full advantage of their proximity, Theory leaned more heavily into Thalia's shoulder and tentatively placed her head on top of hers. Their size difference was enough that all she had to do was look a bit over her own shoulder to do. Theo took a deep breath and held it in, counting how many times her own heart beat until she let the air slowly out of her lungs. This felt good. Being present was a relief. The past still niggled at the back of her mind but it was like a distant voice calling across a lake instead of a vicious breathing hot on the back of her neck. Was this how everyone got by? Maybe if she could steal just a little bit of happiness like this every day, she could get through the next year. And then what? "Things are different now. I can't run even if I want to, I can't let my pack down. It'd just be pissing on my mother's memory." Shaye had trusted her to leader. In her darkest moments, that was all Theory clung to. No matter how bad or confusing things got, Shaye had looked at her and saw someone special and capable. Most days Theory felt like neither. "If your leader is anything like me, he's figuring things out as he goes. Maybe you should talk to him one on one - that might clarify some things," she offered. Spending quality time with her pack mates kept her sane. At its heart, Abaven was a family pack - she would be lost without them. She hoped that any of them would feel comfortable coming to her directly if they felt as lost as Thalia did. Not to say that she had any more answers than any other wolf, but perhaps they could figure it out together; that's what being a family was all about. "If we could run away just the two of us, where would you want to go?" Theory mused, trying to steer the conversation towards something more lighthearted. Back to the present and a lighter, hypothetical future. One where neither of them had any worries or responsibilities. "Speech"

Thalia wasn't quite show if she felt like a adult or not, now. Losing her parents, even if they weren't gone in the same way Theory had mentioned her mother was gone, had forced her to grow up a bit. But she'd never really had much of a childhood - maybe she'd romped around with her siblings occasionally, but the time she'd spent on the island for the festival, meeting Theory and quarreling with her, was probably about all she had for true childhood memories. She'd always been serious and dutiful, and she wondered now if she somehow had missed out. Not that it mattered now, when everything had changed and most of her mental energy was spent on trying to figure out what she was supposed to do next. Was Theory somehow part of the bigger plan? Somehow she'd run into her again, and now here they were, sitting in much closer proximity than she could've expected. The discomfort of it didn't seem to be fading, but likewise she wasn't pulling away, her posture stiff as she remained right where she was sitting, even as Theory leaned into her and pressed her chin against the top of her head. The thought that maybe she was a steady anchor for the other woman was oddly comforting, even if she felt anything but stable herself... She released a sigh as well. Even if Pyrrhic wasn't making all the right choices, she couldn't just up and leave either. Figuring out what direction the Empire needed to shift toward was a priority, but it might not be something that happened overnight.  "Perhaps," she breathed, appreciating Theory's advice even if deep down she'd already known that was exactly what she needed to do. "I just hate the... uncertainty." Thalia would give almost anything to be told, right here on the spot, what precisely she needed to do. Whether staying with Risen was the right choice, or.. something else.  Slowly, almost begrudgingly, she shifted so she was leaning more heavily against Theory, like the physical touch was as much her idea as it was Theory's.   Her next question made a pit in her stomach suddenly form, taking her breath away for a moment. Where would she want to go, if she could run away with Theory? "I haven't seen enough of the world to know. But I liked the island, when we visited," she admitted, letting some of the tension fall from her voice. She was tired, perhaps more tired than a girl her age should be, and keeping up the facade of being tight-laced and cold was even more exhausting.. and somehow Theory, pressed against her, helped relieve some of that innate tension within her. "Somewhere secluded, untouched by mortals." The words left her mouth before she could stop herself, though it didn't seem like she even registered that what she said might not make sense to Theory at all. Somewhere away from everything, with just Theory for company... her stomach fluttered at the thought. "What about you?"

As Thalia relaxed into her body she felt her own inner tension slowly begin to unwind itself. Like a complicated knot, the past few months had only served to further tighten and confused the threads of her life. Sitting here next to her was a welcome change of pace, even if Theory knew it couldn't last. Their meeting would be brief. Maybe one day they could spend more than a few passing hours together, but she knew both of their homes called and pulled them to nearly opposite sides of the continent. How strange that they'd met. How strange she made her feel. Theory nodded against Thalia's skull, creating a pleasant friction on the top of her head. It was almost a nuzzle, if you could call it that. "Uncertainty is frustrating. It's all we've both been faced with these past few months. After the volcano, well... I just keep waiting for the other paw to drop. I can't shake the feeling that something else is coming," she confessed. The feeling wasn't rooted in any true reality - she hadn't observed any of the other scenarios that had predated (and predicted) the peak's eruption. Woodland creatures, although quieter than they used to be - but maybe that was her imagination - were going about their daily business as usual. No one was fleeing. They had reached an uneasy peace in the world but all Theo felt was the unease of it all. Being thrust into her leadership position didn't help things; her own lack of confidence made it feel like the pack was constantly teetering on the edge of disaster. In reality, things were fine. Just fine. Untouched by mortals. In their time together Theory had almost forgotten that Thalia was an Abraxas. She hailed from the pack that Shaye had warned her about. When she was younger she'd thought it was funny, a bunch of god touched fools that lived far enough away that it was almost like a fairytale. Now that she was pressed this close to a true believer it was more difficult to ignore. "I must be a god then, because I've made your wish come true," she said, her voice colored with a soft, unspoken laugh. Theo hoped Thalia would take her joke well. It would be a good way to gauge the situation. "Abaven has claimed the islands from the festival. You can visit me there whenever you'd like... even if it's been touched up all over the place by the mortals I call family." Would they be able to meet half way? Theo hoped so. If she lost Thalia as a friend she'd miss her sorely, but religion and personal beliefs weren't exactly an easy river to ford. Depending on Thalia's reaction they could wind up on opposite sides of a great divide with little hope of crossing to the other's side. "Speech"

Theory's place against her was both comforting and terrifying at the same time - she was deeply unused to physical contact, and she wasn't quite what to make of it. Despite her own complicated feelings on the matter, it felt like she was glued to the spot.. like pulling away might somehow sever whatever stranger connection they shared, and she was terrified of ruining the moment even a minute too soon. She was more starved for contact than she cared to admit, and already she could feel the aching emptiness threatening to return and swallow her whole. It wasn't even that she felt a lack of companionship back home, with the absence of her family - she also felt a terrifying, utter lack of purpose that somehow felt even more isolating.

"I hope you're wrong," Thalia responded, her voice sounding strangely hollow even to herself. Her God was a vengeful one who had no issue coming down hard - as the whole volcano thing had illustrated - on those he felt had done Him wrong. Like Theory, she hadn't noticed anything particularly unusual that might help predict something else of that scale happening, but the uncertainty was overwhelming. If they didn't find a good direction, the right direction, disaster somehow seemed inevitable. Who knew how far in the future such a thing might be...

It was only when Theory responded to her comment that she realized what she'd said at all. The quip almost made her smile, but the expression seemed to stop at her eyes as she twisted to eye Theory slightly. Their closeness hadn't gotten unnoticed for even a second, but looking her in the eye made it suddenly seem even more intimate. "I'll have to thank the volcano for that one," she retorted lightly, certain that the ash-covered plains would be inhabited again soon, once things went back to normal. This wasn't precisely what she meant, though she didn't know how to explain herself - or was Theory simply joking? The thought seemed suddenly stifling to her, blocking out most of her other thoughts. It didn't surprise her that Theory might not understand her family's beliefs, but to hear them commented on so casually was jarring.

It was lost on Thalia whether she was insulting her or merely being conversational when she reminded her that her family were mortals. She knew - she hadn't been about to point that out to Theory, though. "I appreciate that. I might take you up on that offer, when I need to escape again," she admitted with a sigh. Mortals or not - she could visit, at least to see Theory.. right? Though who knew how soon. She knew she needed to focus her attentions on things back home, on the Empire, as they figured things out. "Promise I won't try to fight you again there," Thalia offered, trying to force a smile, though the expression felt contrived.

"I hope I'm wrong too," she admitted. It wasn't a pleasant feeling. If it was all in her head, that would be a welcome reprieve from all the suffering she had endured this past year. It just seemed that things kept going from bad to worse. The timeline of her life looked like: wildfire, dead mom, volcanic eruption, dead mom. Theory often felt like she was someone else's grand experiment in tragedy. How much can wolf endure before they break? Rhyme had already shattered. She was left alone to hold herself together, but strangely, sitting by Thalia's side helped. Theo meant her retort as a joke but the yawning silence that stretched between them sucked any humor out of the air. Their beliefs might be different, but perhaps it wasn't fair of her to be so coarse with someone else's spiritual side. The idea of a "god" or a higher power made Theory uncomfortable. If there was a god, was she responsible for all of her suffering? Pushing the blame onto another being, however ben-or-mal-evolent, seemed a little bit too easy. Theory took pride in taking responsibility for her destiny. If she wasn't in control, then who was? "You're always welcome to escape to me," she said, her voice softer than she'd intended. The strange tenderness of her own words took Theory by surprise. They were so close that she hardly had to whisper for Thalia to hear her. In fact, she was suddenly aware that every exhale gently ruffled the long, soft fur behind Thalia's ears. Oh. All at once her heart seemed to beat as fast as a rabbit caught beneath an eager predator's claws. Theo couldn't tell if she felt elated, nauseous, or a mix of the two. "Maybe I'd let you win the next fight, anyway. In the name of fairness." This was uncharted territory: she was lost at sea and the waters were so deep she couldn't ever hope to see the bottom, but all she wanted to do was dive deeper, deeper, deeper until the pressure above her built and threatened to come crashing down. "Speech"

Somewhere in the midst of their conversation, and their sudden closeness, Thalia had lost sight of why she'd come here at all. She'd hoped she'd get some answers from venturing so close to the volcano, or perhaps that she might find some sign of her parents... but she'd only found Theory, and this wildly intoxicating sensation that seemed to suddenly be flooding her. The confusing sensation made Thalia feel like she was holding her breath, and that if she didn't soon begin to breath again that she might completely dissolve. The disorienting feeling was hard to shake - and yet, mixed with the comfort of her closeness, she had no idea how to proceed.

Her more uncomfortable thoughts at Theory's jesting remark seemed to fade away instantaneously at her open invitation. "Thank you," she said simply, speaking before she even realized she'd opened her mouth. Somehow speaking too loudly seemed like it might destroy the atmosphere they'd accidentally created, and she was still torn between fleeing entirely and staying lost in Theory's semi-embrace. "Though I hope you'd never actually let me win. Never go easy on me." The thought of Theory not showing her full potential wasn't appealing to her. Even when Theory had beat her, during the festival that felt like it had happened so long ago, Thalia had been weirdly drawn in by her fiery spirit and determination... despite also finding it quite aggravating. Maybe it was the dichotomy of feelings that drew her to Theory. "Promise me that," she added, somewhat absently, letting out a low sigh as she subconsciously lean deeper against Theory. She wanted more - suddenly, desperately - and the way she felt drawn to her was equal parts terrifying and nauseating.

It took an alarming amount of energy to pry herself from Theory, looking somewhat bewildered. "I should... head back," Thalia offered, her words slow but abrupt. Focus. She needed to remember why she'd come here. An escape was tempting, but she had so much to figure out.. she couldn't get totally derailed. Thalia stretched her forelimbs, looking apologetic as she slowly pulled herself upright from the cool earth below.

Theory smirked and turned to peer down at Thalia from her place atop the smaller female's head. "I wouldn't dream of going easy on you. I promise." Her comment, of course, had been in jest. She liked the challenges posed by fighting too much to let anyone win. It was partly her pride and partly her position as alpha. Losing would feel like a chip in her armor. Theo couldn't afford to let herself be weak. Every day presented new and distinct opportunities to succeed (to triumph). As Thalia pulled away she took all the heat and comfort with her. The space by her side didn't just feel empty, it felt cavernously vast. She was alone at the bottom of a pit and Thalia had crawled out, leaving just a small lip of light to stare upwards at. Covetously.

"Well, alright..." Theo said, unable to disguise the hurt in her voice. They both had different duties that drew them elsewhere. Opposite sides of the continent, opposite sides of belief systems. "Always remember the Firefly Festival. I'll want my rematch soon," she called after her as Thalia drew further away. Theo felt stupid and ugly and alone - a hideous mix of filthy, terrible things. Did it always hurt this badly to be close to someone? Was it possible to open up to someone else and be rewarded with the warmth that she craved? Maybe she was doomed to be like her father, searching for that flicker of firelight in every good looking creature that she passed. No. Theory hardened herself and headed back towards Abaven territory, a stony glint to her eyes.