It was still so surreal to be back home after months of searching, each morning she opened her eyes felt like a dream. While things were still rocky, as she had imagined after being gone for so long, she was glad that they had taken both her and Spirit back. She had her family once more, albeit a bit broken. While part of her knew that it wasn't her fault that they had gotten split up during the volcano eruption, the mocha coloured lady couldn't help but blame herself. Because of it, she had missed so much in her children's lives, they had grown up without her. Desolate seemed the most hesitant to accept her back into his life, and of that she couldn't blame him. She was his mother, and still she left him by himself, all of them. Over and over her heart broke for them, for Spirit too, who missed out on growing up with his siblings. Eu felt like she could have prevented this all, but couldn't go back in time to change it. There was a lot that she wished that she could change, but leaving her children would always be her biggest regret.

Her paws touched the sand gingerly as she walked down Fontamo Bay, a light breeze ruffling her coat. She hadn't dared to leave pack lands since coming home, afraid that the second she stepped over that border, that something would sweep her away again. She had promised all her children that she would never leave again, and it was a promise that she had the best intentions to keep. There were a lot of bridges to be mended, and lost time to make up for. She was sure that she was driving them all crazy now, there wasn't a time that she wasn't sticking her nose into what they were doing, checking up on them constantly and making sure that all was well. There was such a heavy fear on missing out now, that she would be absent for anything else. It was a fluttering panic that never quite left her chest. It was hard to sleep, hard to do much of anything now, that constant anxiety that she already dealt with heightened. Those months felt like the longest part of her life... even after all that she had been through. Eulogy blew out a heavy sigh, turning to cast her deep blue eyes over the crystal waters to her right. Simple beauty seemed to be lost on her now, like heavy tinted glass blocked her vision. There was so much work to be done to make her family whole again, and she hardly knew how to start. Biting her lip to suppress the whine that threatened to leave her, Eu trotted up the sands and onto a small cliff that was cloaked in long grasses. Even the lapping of the ocean on the shore couldn't still her soul, so she lowered herself onto the grass, her chin resting on her stretched out front limbs. Eulogy closed her eyes and blew out another sigh, ears pulling forward to try to drink it all in. Slowly her heart stilled, matching the ebb and flow of the waters before her. If only the same thing could work on her racing mind...

Gloom was hitting that age where she knew she couldn't really get away with being idle any more, but she was still gripped with panic every time she left her small secluded den. Ultimately she knew she had to do something. And about the only thing the girl felt confident in was fishing. She'd practiced the skills her cousin had shared with her all those seasons ago... it was one the ways she'd managed to survive when she and her siblings had fallen through the cracks. Not that she blamed anyone she understood on some level that her uncle had gone through something so that they'd not been his priority anymore and well... now that she was older she understood just how young Theory really was for all the weight on her shoulders. The girl padded, close to the ground towards the bay, eager to try and catch some fish for the pack. Even if she wasn't overly social she could stand to help fill their stores. She slunk along the beach when she caught wiff of her mother's scent. A soft involuntary whine pulled from her lips. There was something more complicated, something she didn't quite understand. That her brothers couldn't seem to find the same amount of relief, of joy at her mother and brother's return confused the girl. She'd always known she accept them back into her life if she was ever given the chance and their return had helped to bolster the notion that her sister may someday return as well... but she also couldn't help feeling torn up by the fact the reunion wasn't as joyful for her siblings as it was for her... she just wanted them to go back to being a happy family. Gloom adjusted her course to pad up beside her mother, instantly lowering herself to lay beside the bigger woman, and push herself into her mother. She didn't say anything simply, content to exist beside her once again. "speech" think  You

Image by Sterling-Raven

She hadn't realized that she had slipped into a trance like state, focusing on the waves to try to calm herself. It wasn't until she felt someone press against her that she awoke, startled and jumping slightly where she lay. Her heart beat quickly in her chest until the scent of her daughter brought her ease, her tense body relaxing into the girl. A heavy sigh left her lips as Eu lifted her head, placing her throat against the back of Gloom's neck. Neither of them spoke for the moment, her nose finding anything that she could nuzzle into. It had been too long since she had been offered the comfort of her children, that each time was like waking from the worst nightmare to remember that it was all a dream. She couldn't change the past, she knew that, and yet that didn't stop her from longing for all those missed memories. Who was Gloom now? What did she like? What did she fear? There were so many things that she wanted to ask, and yet not sure how to breach the subject. Her daughter seemed to be the only one who had greeted her with such a welcome, easing some of her anxieties towards it all. She knew that there was a lot to mend, but it gave her great comfort to know that the small girl still loved her so deeply.

After several moments of silence. Eulogy picked up her head to lick Gloom's ear, a soft rumble following the loving touch. "What is it that you want to do today?" She asked gently, wishing nothing more than to spend the day at her daughter's side, other than perhaps having all of her family here with them. Small steps, it was hopefully only a matter of time before she didn't need to worry about that anymore. For now Eu would cling fast to any special moment she was presented, not wanting to take anything for granted. So whatever it may be, she would do it for Gloom, each moment more precious than the last. She had thought that she had an affinity for life after what she had been through, but not even that measured up to the guilt and pain of being lost to her children for so long.