I Am Strong Enough
Emersyn
05-30-2021, 07:54 PM
Location: Amron's Castle
It was hard for Duchess to be away from Indigo especially with the pain and condition he was in, but she had to move on and do her duties for the day, provide for the pack and honestly occupy her time with something other than thinking of Indigo. Of course he was always there right behind her first thoughts when she was hunting or scouting.
She had just finished up skinning and portioning a kill, washing herself up at the river in the plains before returning back to the castle. She spotted Emersyn in the courtyard by the steps to get to Indigo's room. And with at least on good meal in for the day, she went to approach her. It was about time they had some one on one time, she wanted to know all the wolves Indigo brought in with him.
She approached her with a small smile, the towering woman not threatening to her here in the presence of the castle. When she felt she was close enough for a conversation she slowed and spoke out, "You seem to be healing alright." It was hard to distinguish now what wounds were the most recent ones with Emersyn's almost never ending scars across her body, but Duchess knew better than to look too hard for them. Maybe she was just used to the pain and healing process, or never healing process. But she was much better off than Indigo when she wheeled him into the castle.
"Duchess"
It was hard for Duchess to be away from Indigo especially with the pain and condition he was in, but she had to move on and do her duties for the day, provide for the pack and honestly occupy her time with something other than thinking of Indigo. Of course he was always there right behind her first thoughts when she was hunting or scouting.
She had just finished up skinning and portioning a kill, washing herself up at the river in the plains before returning back to the castle. She spotted Emersyn in the courtyard by the steps to get to Indigo's room. And with at least on good meal in for the day, she went to approach her. It was about time they had some one on one time, she wanted to know all the wolves Indigo brought in with him.
She approached her with a small smile, the towering woman not threatening to her here in the presence of the castle. When she felt she was close enough for a conversation she slowed and spoke out, "You seem to be healing alright." It was hard to distinguish now what wounds were the most recent ones with Emersyn's almost never ending scars across her body, but Duchess knew better than to look too hard for them. Maybe she was just used to the pain and healing process, or never healing process. But she was much better off than Indigo when she wheeled him into the castle.
05-30-2021, 11:40 PM
By some stroke of luck or the blessings of whatever gods existed, Indigo seemed to be healing nicely. Emersyn had been in the room when Iolaire declared him stable, and said that the only memento he'd have from his fight at the river was a scar across his belly. All things considered, Em chalked that up as a win. She had breathed a sigh of relief at the news, but still didn't lighten up her guard duties for the injured man. This had been her doing, and she would see to it that it was set right. Over the days, she had gotten more relaxed around the amount of wolves the Hallows seemed to have. The last time she'd been in a pack was when she was just a wee pup, and even then those memories had been repressed. Too painful, too painful... Although she had calmed down, she still kept to herself, watching Indigo interact with his band of misfits from the sidelines. They all seemed to happy together, like they were meant to be a little collective family...
On this day, a particularly nice sunny day, Em had situated herself out in the courtyard by the stairs that led into the wing where Indigo was resting. Now that he was healing nicely, she didn't feel the constant need to stay at his door, and permitted herself some time to roam the castle grounds. Old habits were hard to break, however, and the dusty lavender wolf soon found herself just pacing and waiting the day away idly, doing little more than switching from different posts to watch over. All she'd ever known was combat and waiting—and if she wasn't fighting, then she was waiting for the next fight.
Emersyn closed her eyes while the sun warmed her fur, taking in a deep breath of the fresh air tinged slightly by salt from the nearby ocean. She had to admit, the Hallows had picked a gorgeous bit of land to settle on, and the castle was remarkable in its own right too. Everything here was so quiet, so peaceful... But even with the peace, Em's senses were tightly wound and finely tuned, picking up on the soft crunch of paws approaching her before the fae said anything. Emersyn's eyes snapped open, peering down at the littler woman when she commented on her healing injuries. Duchess, this one was Duchess. "Yes, thank you. The healers of this pack are very skilled," she noted, lifting her bandaged paw which had already stopped throbbing every time she put weight on it. "Pain is something I'm familiar with, sadly."
It was true; her body was littered with small scars from her time in the pits, some old and some fresh, each one a story of her past. She set her paw down and looked down into the other girl's duo-toned eyes as well, both wolves sporting heterochromia, though with different shades in their irises. It tickled her a bit; Indigo did indeed have a type after all...
05-31-2021, 11:44 AM
Duchess nodded as Emersyn explained the skills of the healers, but her face went a little more straight as she mentioned pain as a friend of hers. "I'm sorry to hear that." She spoke gently, but usually didn't prod others, especially the ones Indigo brought home, about what they may not want to talk about. She was always open for them to open up with her though it may not have appeared that way by the way she tended to steer away from addressing their inner most emotions and histories.
She took a seat, trying to put on a gentle smile again, "I'm sure you know me by now but we haven't properly introduced ourselves. I'm Duchess." She knew Emersyn was around Indigo enough to maybe understand her place beside him, but Duchess wouldn't piece together this type that she had set in her mind for Indigo. Purple seemed his way to go at least, but Duchess hadn't pulled together a type for him. She was after all the only who had been most involved in him. If anything, his type was just "damaged".
Her head tilted slightly while she spoke out, "Indigo was supposed to teach me some basics on how to defend myself. I don't suppose you'd be willing to help me out at all? I understand if it's not something you want to do." She had considered that maybe Emersyn would have liked to step back from her days of fighting, or at least taken a break from what the physical trauma did to her mentally. Maybe Duchess was just stereotyping her as a fighter, she after all knew nothing about where she came from or what she had been through. Duchess claimed Emersyn much different than either Gypsy or Segin, or herself. Indigo had tended to bring home the ones that needed help protecting themselves, Emersyn seemed quite capable of taking care of herself though.
"Duchess"
She took a seat, trying to put on a gentle smile again, "I'm sure you know me by now but we haven't properly introduced ourselves. I'm Duchess." She knew Emersyn was around Indigo enough to maybe understand her place beside him, but Duchess wouldn't piece together this type that she had set in her mind for Indigo. Purple seemed his way to go at least, but Duchess hadn't pulled together a type for him. She was after all the only who had been most involved in him. If anything, his type was just "damaged".
Her head tilted slightly while she spoke out, "Indigo was supposed to teach me some basics on how to defend myself. I don't suppose you'd be willing to help me out at all? I understand if it's not something you want to do." She had considered that maybe Emersyn would have liked to step back from her days of fighting, or at least taken a break from what the physical trauma did to her mentally. Maybe Duchess was just stereotyping her as a fighter, she after all knew nothing about where she came from or what she had been through. Duchess claimed Emersyn much different than either Gypsy or Segin, or herself. Indigo had tended to bring home the ones that needed help protecting themselves, Emersyn seemed quite capable of taking care of herself though.
05-31-2021, 04:41 PM
Duchess' sympathies were noted, but ultimately Emersyn didn't want sympathies. She felt bad enough about her own existence to not need anyone else to remind her how much her life sucked. She didn't hold it against the daintier woman though; she was trying to be kind, and Em wouldn't chew her out for that. Kindness, however, was not something she knew how to navigate. Duchess sat down and gave her another smile, then introduced herself officially. It was true, she knew of Duchess in passing from talks with Indy, but she didn't actually know anything about her. Em gave a strained smile back, not because she was finding it hard to be polite, but because she was finding it hard to have a real reason to smile. "Indigo's talked about you a lot," she stated with a nod. "I'm Emersyn. Em for short." It still felt weird using her real name again. She had gotten so used to going by Thistle that Emersyn felt more like the nickname than her pit fighter name by now.
Emersyn raised a curious brow when Duchess informed her that Indigo was supposed to teach her how to fight and defend herself before he got injured. She gave a brief glance over the little wolf, trying to picture the lightweight girl in an actual fight. It was a stretch of the imagination for sure, but hell, she'd seen some tough-ass pit fighters not much bigger than Duchess was. "Is that so?" she said with a pensive hum. She supposed she could give Duchess a few basic pointers, especially since she had nothing else to occupy her time with, and this at least felt familiar to her. "Well, since Indy's out of commission because of me, I suppose it's the least I can do, right?"
Rising to her paws, the dusty lavender and black fae motioned for Duchess to follow her. She led the smaller girl into the center of the courtyard, soft grass and cobblestone underneath their paws while she found a space large enough for them to move around without tripping over anything. She surveyed their makeshift arena with a nod, then looked back to Duchess, a familiar life returning to her gaze. "There's a lot that goes into learning to fight. Basic offense, defense, footwork and maneuvering, dodging, being aware of your surroundings..." While it sounded like a lot, Em was able to break it down into whatever Duchess wanted to learn. "Has anyone ever shown you any basics? How to stand, where to attack, how to block an attack...? Are we starting at square one, or is there something specific you wanted Indy to show you?"
06-01-2021, 08:30 PM
Duchess nearly blushed as Emersyn mentioned Indigo talking about her a lot. But maybe she secretly expected him too. She did like to think of herself as the most important woman in his life, though she wasn't outward about it or didn't act like everyone else should kiss the ground she walked on or anything. She tried to make the rest of them feel welcome and equal, it was what Indigo would want or at least she thought so.
She nodded as Emersyn agreed to help her out, maybe a silent thank you but she supposed she would vocally thank her afterwards. Duchess was much more quiet than she was social. She wished everyone could feel what she had going through her mind like Indigo could. But he wasn't quite catching onto everything now, was he?
She followed Emersyn out into the grasses of the courtyard, facing her head on as she explained a few things or maybe what were good points to go over. She asked how much Duchess knew herself, and Duchess shook her head slightly, her gaze looking up at Emersyn's still with a small smile, "I only know how to hunt, I've never had to protect myself from anything." In a way, that was a lie. She did have to protect herself from Draco, she just chose not to and didn't see the wrong in his actions. "My job was provide." She stated, though she didn't want Emersyn to feel like she was pampered or anything like that. But she wasn't one to talk others down like her problems were worse than theirs, she felt completely opposite in fact. "I'm willing to learn as much as you want to teach me. We can take it slow."
"Duchess"
She nodded as Emersyn agreed to help her out, maybe a silent thank you but she supposed she would vocally thank her afterwards. Duchess was much more quiet than she was social. She wished everyone could feel what she had going through her mind like Indigo could. But he wasn't quite catching onto everything now, was he?
She followed Emersyn out into the grasses of the courtyard, facing her head on as she explained a few things or maybe what were good points to go over. She asked how much Duchess knew herself, and Duchess shook her head slightly, her gaze looking up at Emersyn's still with a small smile, "I only know how to hunt, I've never had to protect myself from anything." In a way, that was a lie. She did have to protect herself from Draco, she just chose not to and didn't see the wrong in his actions. "My job was provide." She stated, though she didn't want Emersyn to feel like she was pampered or anything like that. But she wasn't one to talk others down like her problems were worse than theirs, she felt completely opposite in fact. "I'm willing to learn as much as you want to teach me. We can take it slow."
06-03-2021, 09:01 PM
Emersyn pursed her lips as she considered Duchess' words. So the girl had no knowledge or experience fighting. She had kind of assumed as much, but she was a hunter, and a lot of those same principles could apply in a fight, so that was a good start! Perhaps some of these other violet-hued wolves would have hidden qualities and traits about them that could be useful too. It seemed like their little band worked on a societal model, with everyone doing something to help contribute to the rest. Duchess was a hunter, Indigo the muscle, and Segin the healer. Gypsy... well, Em didn't really know much about Gypsy yet. "All right, we can work with that," she said with a nod when Duchess mentioned her hunting skills. "Let's start with the basics then. Standing and stances, footwork, and how to attack and defend." Yes, those would be good first lessons. They could break it up into as many segments as the girl wanted.
"So, just like hunting, fighting depends a lot on how you move and hold your body. It's sort of like how you want to make yourself as invisible as possible when hunting, in fighting you want to make yourself as stable as you can." Emersyn spread her paws to a little more than shoulder width, bracing her hind paws in perfect symmetry with her front. "When you're standing still or bracing yourself, try to keep your legs evenly spaced in front and in back. That'll help prevent you from being toppled over. Don't lock up your muscles either, or you pretty much become a table. Be tense, but flexible. You should be ready to move, but also bend your knees." Emersyn made a demonstration of lowering her body and lifting it back up just by bending her joints.
"Once you've got your feet steady, you want to try and keep your head and neck aligned with your spine. That makes you much sturdier and packs a lot more punch if you lunge at someone, like this," she said, showing Duchess how she lowered her head to make an almost perfectly straight line along the top of her head, her neck, and her back. "You give it a try. Try to copy what I'm doing, then feel what it's like to slowly move around while keeping that stance." Ever the one to lead by doing, Em began to slowly pace back and forth as if she were eyeing an opponent, her movements slow and deliberate, body tensed and ready to pounce. She would be a living example for Duchess, and she would watch the smaller fae to help her out where she needed.
06-04-2021, 06:52 PM
As Emersyn explained and demonstrated, Duchess would try to follow through as best she can. Though, she guessed it was as the large woman had stated, the stances weren't much different than if she were stalking a prey. But obviously, this wasn't to be quiet, this was to be steady. Duchess evened out for paws a bit slowly beside Emersyn, though she was probably acting like it had to be a little too perfect. Her paws skittered as she tried to decide exactly how far apart they should be or the placement. She at least had a bit of anxiety embarrassing herself, though maybe she was doing that by trying so hard.
Duchess looked down at her knees as Emersyn explained, but couldn't quite get the movement right. Be stiff but loose? She wasn't really getting the hang of it, but she supposed she would need a lot more practice. It seemed a little easier as she tried to mimic Emersyn, but she still didn't really have it. At least the idea and the demonstration was still in her mind.
She lowered her head which was a bit more natural for her. Aligning her spine and moving with careful feet seemed to be something she was used to, or at least already knew. She found herself easily moving around, facing Emersyn as they traveled in the stance. She really couldn't imagine herself striking out at anyone though. Prey and wolves were different to her. And even though she may not have liked the idea of hurting anyone, she had more of an issue with her lack of confidence to defend herself.
She stood still, raising her head though her expression was mostly flat when she spoke, "I appreciate you doing this." She didn't know if this was something that Emersyn enjoyed or if it unlocked some kind of dangerous past for her. Duchess wasn't one to ask, but she always had an open ear if one was needed. "It is easy to relate to hunting."
"Duchess"
Duchess looked down at her knees as Emersyn explained, but couldn't quite get the movement right. Be stiff but loose? She wasn't really getting the hang of it, but she supposed she would need a lot more practice. It seemed a little easier as she tried to mimic Emersyn, but she still didn't really have it. At least the idea and the demonstration was still in her mind.
She lowered her head which was a bit more natural for her. Aligning her spine and moving with careful feet seemed to be something she was used to, or at least already knew. She found herself easily moving around, facing Emersyn as they traveled in the stance. She really couldn't imagine herself striking out at anyone though. Prey and wolves were different to her. And even though she may not have liked the idea of hurting anyone, she had more of an issue with her lack of confidence to defend herself.
She stood still, raising her head though her expression was mostly flat when she spoke, "I appreciate you doing this." She didn't know if this was something that Emersyn enjoyed or if it unlocked some kind of dangerous past for her. Duchess wasn't one to ask, but she always had an open ear if one was needed. "It is easy to relate to hunting."
06-07-2021, 03:55 PM
As Duchess attempted to mimic her movements and followed along with her lesson, Emersyn would nod approvingly when the smaller girl got the basics down right. "Yes, exactly. You're doing great,"she reassured the young woman, a ghost of a smile just barely noticeable on the corners of her lips while they practiced together. Duchess' movements seemed a little too forced, too rehearsed, but she was new to this and it was to be expected. The more she practiced, the more natural it would feel. Em was reminded of when she had started off in the coliseum, being beaten through the grueling training grounds to get things right. At least Duchess wouldn't have to worry about being hit or whipped if she got something wrong.
The deadpan words of appreciation made her ears flick, but she nodded all the same. Appreciation and gratitude were still not things the larger dusty fae was used to, but she could pretend like she knew what to do with them. "It's the least I could do for putting Indigo in the hospital," she remarked, trying to not let the guilt creep up on her again—or at least to not show it in her expression. "Everyone should know the basics of how to protect themselves, at least. Even if you aren't the one starting a fight, you should have the means to make sure nobody can hurt you or take advantage of you." Boy, that was rich coming from her. The former slave fighter giving advice on how not to be taken advantage of. Laughable.
"So how did you end up in Indigo's little purple wolf club?" she asked while she instructed Duchess to repeat the same motions again, but this time on her own so she could get used to the movements and find what felt most natural and comfortable for her.
06-15-2021, 04:21 PM
As much as Emersyn may have thought her explanation silly, taking advantage of you, it was the same for Duchess. Entirely different situations, but she had been abused and taken it as it is. And she would have gladly done it again for Indigo. Emersyn had a more harsh past, at least how Duchess saw it. And Duchess didn't even really know anything about her past. But from the looks of it, Duchess claimed it worse than anything she had endured. It was just the way she thought.
"It used to be just me and Indigo, and then Gypsy. And I wanted to learn to protect her." She confessed, though to no shame. But as her learning appeared, she really was inexperienced in any kind of physical way. Sure wolves her size or smaller could fight, but she was very written off as a non-fighter type.
Emersyn asked Duchess about how she became part of the purple wolf club and she blushed. She did honestly feel a little offended by the label, but she was more embarrassed for whatever reason being called out like that. Emersyn probably meant no harm, but it unsettled Duchess slightly. She wasn't going to announce that though. "Oh, I just um..." She paused, looking down at the ground for a few seconds before looking back towards Emersyn, "I guess I actually found him. Down south, I guess he looked like he needed... fixing." She wasn't used to talking about Indigo like this to anyone. And it felt a little weird to say Indigo needed fixing. But it was true. She saw in his demeanor and expression how he felt and she knew the feeling. And something in her told her to interact with him. And here she was.
"Duchess"
"It used to be just me and Indigo, and then Gypsy. And I wanted to learn to protect her." She confessed, though to no shame. But as her learning appeared, she really was inexperienced in any kind of physical way. Sure wolves her size or smaller could fight, but she was very written off as a non-fighter type.
Emersyn asked Duchess about how she became part of the purple wolf club and she blushed. She did honestly feel a little offended by the label, but she was more embarrassed for whatever reason being called out like that. Emersyn probably meant no harm, but it unsettled Duchess slightly. She wasn't going to announce that though. "Oh, I just um..." She paused, looking down at the ground for a few seconds before looking back towards Emersyn, "I guess I actually found him. Down south, I guess he looked like he needed... fixing." She wasn't used to talking about Indigo like this to anyone. And it felt a little weird to say Indigo needed fixing. But it was true. She saw in his demeanor and expression how he felt and she knew the feeling. And something in her told her to interact with him. And here she was.
06-16-2021, 11:23 PM
Em sat quietly while Duchess explained—somewhat abashedly—how she had come to be in the company of Indigo. There was little detail shared, but she really didn't need to know the nitty-gritty of their relationship. From what she had seen of how Duchess and Indigo interacted, she clearly had a strong bond with the bigger man that bordered on obsessive infatuation. It mattered little to her though; all the more power to the little violet girl. Her words struck something in her though. Indigo looked like he needed fixing. Fixing. That implied that Indigo was broken as well, just like them. The notion was absurd. Nothing about that man seemed broken—except for his body because of her, maybe.
For a long moment she didn't say a word, instead quietly contemplating what Duchess had said. It was like Indigo had told her: broken souls just seemed to gravitate towards him like he was a magnet for trouble. Despite how difficult it was for her to think of the wolf that had thrown himself into deadly combat to protect her as being broken himself, she hadn't known Indigo as long as the others had, and she only had a very limited scope to make assumptions off of. "I'm glad you two found each other then," she commented plainly, not entirely sure what else to add. "What were you doing before you found Indigo?" The question was meant to answer two questions indirectly: where Duchess had come from and how old she was. The little purple lady still seemed so very young to her, but she could be mistaken.
"Emersyn"
For a long moment she didn't say a word, instead quietly contemplating what Duchess had said. It was like Indigo had told her: broken souls just seemed to gravitate towards him like he was a magnet for trouble. Despite how difficult it was for her to think of the wolf that had thrown himself into deadly combat to protect her as being broken himself, she hadn't known Indigo as long as the others had, and she only had a very limited scope to make assumptions off of. "I'm glad you two found each other then," she commented plainly, not entirely sure what else to add. "What were you doing before you found Indigo?" The question was meant to answer two questions indirectly: where Duchess had come from and how old she was. The little purple lady still seemed so very young to her, but she could be mistaken.
07-08-2021, 08:41 PM
She was being awfully nosy, wasn't she? Duchess couldn't help but feel really uncomfortable with the couple of Emersyn's questions, especially while she had taken a note to not ask Emersyn too much about her own harsh life. She felt like she had to be really careful around others, especially when she felt that their past wasn't necessarily great.
She was already a little flushed from her last question, so she wouldn't be bluntly showing her more heated emotions as they blended in together but it was probably very obvious that she just felt uncomfortable or awkward now in these moments. "I uh," She hesitated a second, not really sure what she wanted to say. She tended not to talk about herself much, and facing things about her past was something she tried to work around. Especially since she didn't know Emersyn all that well either. "I just had to learn to be on my own for a while." It was really all she could get out about it. She had been abandoned by her parents, she had Draco afterwards but they both learned how to survive by themselves. And when he left her, she did have all the skills she needed to keep herself alive at the least. Everything but knowing how to protect herself of course.
"Duchess"
She was already a little flushed from her last question, so she wouldn't be bluntly showing her more heated emotions as they blended in together but it was probably very obvious that she just felt uncomfortable or awkward now in these moments. "I uh," She hesitated a second, not really sure what she wanted to say. She tended not to talk about herself much, and facing things about her past was something she tried to work around. Especially since she didn't know Emersyn all that well either. "I just had to learn to be on my own for a while." It was really all she could get out about it. She had been abandoned by her parents, she had Draco afterwards but they both learned how to survive by themselves. And when he left her, she did have all the skills she needed to keep herself alive at the least. Everything but knowing how to protect herself of course.
07-10-2021, 06:45 PM
It was glaringly obvious that Duchess' history was something of a sore subject for her. The moment she asked what she had been up to prior to finding Indigo, a seemingly innocuous question about her life, the mirth on the smaller lady's face all but vanished, suddenly seeming much more uncomfortable with their conversation. She gave a very vague answer, but it was so much more answer in what it didn't say. Emersyn nodded; Duchess didn't want to talk about it, and she wouldn't pursue it further. She herself had her own demons, ones she didn't exactly enjoy discussing at length, though she had come to accept her fucked up life more readily by now. She was perfectly content to let the conversation drop where it did.
"That was a good start. See? Fighting is less about just trying to hurt your opponent as much as is it keeping yourself from being hurt." She glossed over their previous conversation, slipping seamlessly back into instruction as if nothing had changed. "Think about how you would move if the prey you were hunting tried to fight back. That's what fighting another wolf can be like." Em got to her paws and shook out her coat, heading for the castle gates. She wanted to start repaying the pack for their kindness by standing watch on the gates when Indigo slept, remaining a vigilant guard wherever she could. "Just keep practicing your footing, then we can work on some other battle techniques. You're doing fine."
Em dipped her head to Duchess, wordlessly dismissing herself and allowing Duchess to return to whatever she had planned for the rest of her day.
- exit Emersyn -
"Emersyn"
"That was a good start. See? Fighting is less about just trying to hurt your opponent as much as is it keeping yourself from being hurt." She glossed over their previous conversation, slipping seamlessly back into instruction as if nothing had changed. "Think about how you would move if the prey you were hunting tried to fight back. That's what fighting another wolf can be like." Em got to her paws and shook out her coat, heading for the castle gates. She wanted to start repaying the pack for their kindness by standing watch on the gates when Indigo slept, remaining a vigilant guard wherever she could. "Just keep practicing your footing, then we can work on some other battle techniques. You're doing fine."
Em dipped her head to Duchess, wordlessly dismissing herself and allowing Duchess to return to whatever she had planned for the rest of her day.