Ophie was really trying, you know? But old habits were hard to break, like chains wrapped around her tight, and the more she struggled the more they coiled around her. Tighter and tighter till it was hard to breathe. She thought that going outside would help, getting a change of scenery put a bit of a spring into her step only for her to slow down when she realised that this was the reason she didn't go out. Her breathing was huffy and laboured as she slowed to a crawl, her tail hanging limp as her sides heaved. Maybe jogging just wasn't an Ophie thing, maybe it never would be.

Plonking her hefty rump down, Ophie just sat there as she waited for her breathing to level out. The weather was as nice as it could manage at this time of year and the scenery that surrounded her was pleasant enough, with it's rolling hills and long swaying grass. Hills that Ophie had no interest in scaling anytime soon. With nothing but her own thoughts to fill the silence she couldn't help but dwell on the hows and whys, her siblings had struggled with grief just as much as she had. Why had Ophie been the only one to spiral so wildly out of control? Was it simply a matter of being weaker than the rest? Sometimes it really felt as though that was the case, that all of her siblings both old and young had left her in the dust with no intention of giving her time to catch up.

Kinda sad now that she thought about it.

Things had changed drastically since Sirius and Zee had squirted out their second litter. Aslatiel had hated them with every fiber of her being. These days, she simply didn't have the time to care. Briar was the only one that had made an effort to get to know her, and so Briar was her favorite. Asla no longer hated the others, she just didn't care. She didn't feel any familial pull towards them because they were strangers, in a sense. Leagues apart.

Cresting a hill while out hunting, Aslatiel came upon one of the second batch of Fatalis children. Having not made a point of getting to know them or seeking them out, Asla hadn't realized just how fat O...pheeelia(?) had gotten. Becoming this rotund didn't happen overnight, and Asla wondered just when the girl had begun to gorge herself. It was a pity. Beneath all of the filth, she was one of the prettier ones in the batch.

Seeing the girl huffing and puffing as though she was ready to keel over, Asla couldn't just continue on by. Giving her galactic gaze a roll, she padded forward. Grey ears flicked forward as the cream colored fae came up beside her younger sister. "You look half dead," the woman spoke, never pulling any punches. "Are you alright? Want to go get a drink? There's a stream over this way." Being the seasoned huntress that Asla was, she'd been here many times and knew the place fairly well. Perhaps wetting her tongue and cooling off would do well for the girl's current state, but Asla didn't even know how to begin working on her mental state. Something had to push her into getting this out of shape.

"Aslatiel Fatalis"

Ophie really wasn't in a state for company, so naturally someone just happened to come along. She flinched, nearly toppling over as her eyes widened in comical alarm. She almost wanted it to be a stranger, at least then there was always a chance they'd never meet again, that they'd just write her off as yet another weirdo who roamed the land. But of course it wasn't, it was Aslatiel and the words she had to offer were less than kind. It was just about what Ophie had come to expect from her older, but not bigger, sister. Aside from Mortis her older siblings didn't seem overly interested in Ophie and her lot, that was fine, she'd never force the issue but... It was hard to cling onto the ideals of family when half of them were happy to pretend you didn't exist. She'd never had a one on one conversation with Indigo or Azure, hell she wouldn't have even been surprised if they didn't recall her name. Not that she would really blame them either, it wasn't like she was all that memorable.

"Ah- I'm sorry." Ophie wasn't really sure what she was apologising for, her existence maybe? Beyond that, she just didn't want to get in the way, least of all with someone who clearly had more important things to do than deal with Ophie and her nonsense. "You don't have to, I can.." Can what? It wasn't like she was making much of a difference on her own.

She got to her paws, legs a little wobbly and breathing still uneven.


"It's really good to see you again." She found herself saying, gravely missing the good old days. Whenever they even were.

As the girl caught her breath and caught wind of another watching, Asla could see the embarrassment on her face. The smaller woman shifted her gaze away reflexively, not wanting the kid to feel worse. When did she care about the feelings of her younger siblings? Who knew? Yet here she was, trying not to stare for the sake of whatever pride Ophie might have had.

The girl apologized and Asla wrinkled her nose, her gaze swinging back. Why was she apologizing? Again Ophie spoke, but she trailed off. Had the girl always been so unsure of herself? Aslatiel couldn't really remember. The grimey wolf pulled herself shakily to her paws as though she was going to move off and Asla was ready to just let her go... but then she spoke again.

Well shit...

Ophie's words were kind and surprising. There was no reason that it should be good to see Asla. She had threatened and thought about drowning all of them more times than could be counted. Things were different now. Asla had grown into something different. Something less selfish. No longer did she wish harm on her siblings, but she still hadn't felt much for them. Seeing Ophie so vulnerable and damaged... Well, Asla needed to do something.

"Come on," the woman spoke softly. Moving past Ophie, Asla's tail tapped the girl's shoulder. She continued along the path and pushed down a game trail until the greenery opened up on a small, clear stream. Asla stepped into the water with her front paws and took a drink. She cast a glance over her shoulder to see if her sister had followed.

"Aslatiel Fatalis"

Sometimes Ophie just couldn't help herself. Was it so wrong that she just wanted to be loved? She knew Asla probably wasn't the best wolf for it, that her gaze was as sharp as her cat claws, but her desperation was obvious. Overeating was a silent cry for help, a slow suicide that left her guilt riddled with each bite. She couldn't even say that she enjoyed food all that much, it was simply a habit by now and Ophie was going through the motions, over and over till she couldn't even remember what had started this vicious cycle.

Asla reached out for her and out of instinct -and stupidity- Ophie flinched. It was dumb and she was quick to shoot her sister an apologetic look and even leaned into her touch for good measure. She wasn't really sure why, but even Ophie could see that her sister was trying to help,  and if nothing else it'd be really rude and selfish to slap away a helping hand. Following her lead, she plodded down to the stream and took a hesitant look at her reflection below.

She loathed what she saw, her sides still bulging out as she huffed and puffed.

Ophie eyed the water as though she feared she might fall in and drown. Having grown up by the sea she could swim well enough, Hanako was a decent teacher when it came to activities she actually enjoyed, but it wasn't as if the water was even deep enough for there to be an issue. Just Ophie things, digging up concerns where there aren't any. Besides, Asla had stepped into the water too, they might not be friends but she hoped her sister wouldn't let her die just like that...

Bending down, Ophie took in a much-needed mouthful of water. And then another and another till her muzzle was dripping wet.

"Bwah." Now Ophie was out of breath for another reason, a better one. "Sorry. Gos told me to maybe go for a run and see how it went." Needless to say it hadn't gone well. She hadn't gotten nearly as far or as fast as she knew a wolf was capable of. "I know it looks bad but...I'm really trying, you know?" And now she was dumping all of her loaded nonsense onto Asla. Did she have no shame?

Asla had noted Ophie's flinch, but said nothing of it. The girl recovered and soon they were drinking from the stream together. After wetting her tongue, Asla lay on the soft grass of the bank. She kept her front paws in the water, enjoying the feeling of the liquid as the gentle current drifted between her toes. She waited for her sister to finish drinking as well and noted just how much the girl had needed some water. Asla felt bad for her. Truly.

Once Ophie began to speak and the pieces of the puzzle began to come together, Aslatiel understood Ophie's predicament a little better. She had been out running to try and take off some of the weight at the behest of one of the other siblings. That was good. Ophie was showing initiative. She was trying to better herself. Anyone who faulted the girl for that in Asla's presence would meet her teeth. What was that? Asla was feeling protective now? Go figure...

"It's good that you're trying to make yourself healthier," she began, eyes directed towards the water where she watched her toes flex below the surface. "You need to build stamina though. Can't expect to run for miles on your very first go, you know?" That was Asla's way of suggesting that Ophie be careful and cautious.

Another thought popped into Asla's mind as she looked towards her portly sister. The cream and grey woman opened and closed her mouth a few times before gritting her teeth for a moment. She needed to just say it. "I'm sorry that I wasn't there for you. If I had been, maybe you wouldn't need to work so hard now." The fur at the back of Asla's neck bristled slightly. She didn't like admitting that she was at fault for anything, but pushing her siblings away was slowly becoming a real regret. "I was able to reconnect with Briar. Maybe you and I could do the same." If Ophie didn't loathe her, that was.

"Aslatiel Fatalis"

Ophie knew, in theory at least, that her efforts were a sign of things getting better and if she kept this up she'd eventually make some progress. But having a strong resolve had never been one of her strengths, the urge to crumble and fall back into old habits was already biting at her heels. What if she got everyone's hopes up only to let them down? Would they hate her? Ophie clung onto Asla's words, hoping that her failure today wasn't really her fault, just an expected result from pushing herself too far too fast. She nodded and hummed thoughtfully n the back of her throat, it was a little easy for her to say that though. Asla was the best huntress all around, everyone said so.

Finally, settling back on her chubby haunches, Ophie made a point of angling herself away from the water's reflection. She hadn't expected Asla to apologise for anything, least of all something that was well out of her paws. It shouldn't have been her responsibility to keep Ophie on the straight and narrow, it was something she should have been capable enough to deal with on her own. Maybe she just hadn't tried hard enough.

"It's not your fault." Ophie began, her voice a scarce whisper as her gaze locked on the sight of her cat claws slightly poking out. They shared this at least. "It's not anyone's. For the longest time...I didn't want to be helped, I think I would have pushed you away if you'd tried." Doubt still slipped in, feelings of unworthiness made every step feel like something she ought to feel guilty about. It was...a lot. She looked up at Asla then, her gaze soft like tropical waters. Ophie held no resentment in her heart, she had so much love to give and yet still did not have enough to spare for herself. "I'd...really like that. If it's okay."

Ophie was adamant that it wasn't Asla's fault, but the fawn colored fae felt otherwise. She could have done something. She could have made an effort. The woman gave her head a shake. "No, some of this is my fault. When she disappeared, I should have stepped up." 'She' referring to their mother. Asla hadn't minded that the woman was missing, but the younger batch of pups felt the loss of Zee. "Sirius went mad when she disappeared and that left all of you without any guidance. I picked up the slack for the pack, but I didn't pick up the slack for you." The fae's striped tail began to lash back and forth like an irritated cat as she mentally reflected upon her actions, or lack thereof. Eventually she gave her head a shake. "No matter how you feel about it, Ophelia, I'm sorry."

The girl was so... good. There was a sweet, shy purity to her. Something that Asla had never possessed. It was very endearing and it made her want to protect her chubby sister. Despite everything that had happened, Ophie still wanted a relationship with her. Asla's tall grey ears tucked for a moment. She didn't believe that she deserved a second chance, but she would accept it.

"You don't ever have to feel alone, okay?" Rising from her place at the edge of the stream, the smaller wolf stepped close to her sister. She didn't care that Ophie was dirty and probably a little smelly. "My den is always open to you and I'll make time whenever you need. If you want to work together to get this weight off, I'll do that for you too." Standing before her sister, Asla lifted one foreleg and motioned for the girl to come in close. What was that? Was Aslatiel offering an embrace to one of her younger siblings? One of the very siblings that she had threatened to drown on more than one occasion? Yes. Yes she was.

"Aslatiel Fatalis"

Ophie parted her lips, determined to insist Asla had done nothing wrong, only to click her teeth shut as her sister continued to say her piece. A lot had happened at once, there was no way Asla could have kept everything in check, something was bound to slip. It was for the best that it had been Ophie who had fallen to the wayside, anything else would have been harder to recover from and ran the risk of crumbling the Armada's foundations. Ophie was just a princess, one amongst many, if she'd gone missing she knew she would have been missed, that her family would have searched far and wide. But ultimately they would recover, move on  and look back through rose-tinted glasses, lamenting all the things she could have been. Mourning her potential and not who she really was; a muddy disgrace.

Apologising seemed to be a thing Fatalis' visibly struggled with and Ophie just wasn't the sort to spit it back in her sister's face, not when she was laying it out like this. No punches pulled. It hurt a little to know her actions, or rather inaction, were causing Asla any distress. This wasn't what she wanted but would not deny the apology or the baggage that came with it. The world was a big, scary place, having wolves like Asla at her back made her feel a little less small,  like she finally counted in someone eyes. As though getting better was a real possibility, not something worth crying herself to sleep at night.

Ophie sniffed, a little teary, and her chest felt tight but not from lack of breath. She shuffled closer to meet her sister in the middle, hesitant but hopeful as she eyed Asla's extended limb. Ophie had always been touchy-feely, eager to feel the warmth of something over than the heat of her own chub, but did Asla really mean it? What if she recoiled away in disgust? Ophie's coat was as manky as ever, abysmal compared to the smooth tan of her sister's form.

Unable to help herself, Ophie stumbled into her embrace, letting out pathetic little sniffs as she buried her muzzle into the fluff of her coat. She felt like home, what family really ought to be. Pressing as much of her form against her as she could manage, Ophie squeezed her eyes shut, finding comfort in the darkness.

"I'm sorry I used to think you were scary." Her voice wobbled, the truth coming in the safety of her hold.

As Ophie came and poured herself into Asla's embrace, the smaller woman rose onto her haunches and wrapped both grey forelegs around her younger sister. She was truly sorry for how she had acted as a child and being a child was no excuse. Asla squeezed Ophie tightly to her, her cheek against the grey girl's head. It didn't matter to her that Ophie was chunky or smelly or dirty. She obviously needed this and Asla was more than happy to give the girl this affection.


Ophie's words brought a sudden burst of laughter from Aslatiel and the fawn colored fae grinned. "Oph, I was scary. I wanted to drown all of you. I hated that you were taking the attention off of me." Asla released a soft laugh. "It took me a little while to realize how much of an idiot I was." Giving the girl a squeeze, Asla pushed her back to arms length, purple eyes meeting blue. "Hopefully we can make up for lost time while we're able to. We have all winter." All winter until she and the pups were gone. Then who knew what type of relationships would last or die after that?

"So you're trying." Asla put her paws back on the ground. "We should hunt sometime. You could run patrols with me in the mornings." Asla gave her head a slight tilt. "If you're serious about it, I'll help you. If you're happy with the way that you are, that's fine too." Asla didn't want to force her sister into anything, but if she wanted to lose some of the weight that she held, Asla would be more than happy to help her.

"Aslatiel Fatalis"

Ophie was unable to hold back the flinch that shuddered through her form. She knew Asla had never been fond of them but to actually want to drown them was another beast entirely. She wasn't really sure by what she meant by attention though, as realistically speaking the second litter hadn't gotten much attention in the grand scheme of things, as though they were just a second thought. The spares, the do-over litter that wouldn't ever amount to much. It was hard to admit, but Ophie felt as though her parents, or the pack at large, even realised what they were doing. That it all came so naturally to them, like ignoring shadows in the corners of their vision.

Even then it was hard to blame Asla, not without pointing the finger at everyone else too.

"I don't think it's you." She mumbled, surging forward to hide her face in the safety of her sister's coat again. "Sometimes it feels like no one wants us around. I've never even spoken to my other older siblings, other than you and Mortis. Kotori is always off adventuring and my sisters...they're busy getting strong." Living up to the family name.

It was a nice thought though, that they had time to restart afresh. To try and be better to one another, in their own little ways. She took comfort in that and hummed softly, hoping it would help.

"I know I need to think about who I want to be and what I want, but it's hard. I always feel like the answer is nothing."