The den was quiet at first, but with focus subtle breathing was heard. Soon, the soft breathing of the sleeping man would quicken gradually and then quickly until it was near frantic. Mismatched legs started to kick weakly during the nightmare as his face scrunched up to represent his fear and desperation to stay above the water haunting his mind, soft whines and gasping breaths breaking up the otherwise silence and shuffling noises of his moving legs. He awoke with a loud yelp! as his body crashed into a rock, bi-colored eyes opening his fright suddenly as he jolted awake gasping for air.

Where was he? Certainly not in the water, so his breathing calmed and he looked around while his vision started to focus. Alone. Kunai frowned, but laid his head back down. He was so tired but refused to close his eyes. As his senses started to return to him, he picked up a few familiar scents in the den, one more so than others. Usagi. Where was he? He tried to speak, to call out for him, but his throat was dry and sore. How long had he been asleep?

"Speech!"

Code © Skelle 2022

Usagi had vowed to stay with Kunai, especially during the man’s illness, in one den. He felt a bit unsure about it at first, having been used to being in a den with his brother most of his life. It was a new feeling, to now shift into sharing a den with someone whom he had..certain feelings for. Feelings the man sttempted to hide under averted gazes and flushed cheeks. But it was undeniable, the love he felt for Kunai. It was its own beast, not ugly, just large and waiting to be acknowledged. He had yet to utter the words ‘I love you’, because every time he tried his tongue felt twisted up and suddenly he found it hard to spit out a single letter. So, he tried his best to show his affections in actions, since he was mkre adept at that. Thus, his first loving gesture was slipping out at the crack of dawn from Kunai’s sleeping form, careful not to disturb him. He figured the man would be hungry once he rose, so the Hohei went to get some breakfast.

Most of the pack’s food was fish and other sea life, seeing as their territory lay on a bay. Though not a fan of fishing, he waded into the crisp waters and caught two fat fish, one flr each of them - he wouldn’t even mind giving Kunai the rest of his fish if he was still hungry. After all, the chimera koi was still recovering his strength. He needed the nutrients and rest. He had to admit, the fishing process and swimming in the water also helped strengthen his own ankle, which was much less painful and was virtually back to normal. Managing to grab both fish in his maw, the flop-eared wolf made a beeline back to the den. Much to his surprise, Kunai was awake.

"Oh, Kunai, you’re awake," Usagi said, having placed his catch on the ground in front of him. Taking one fish and leaving the bigger one for his - erm, boyfriend? Partner? A friend that was more than a friend but not quite something else? Was it even official? They hadn’t said anything about it yet to each other, except that the feelings they had for each other hung in the air as obvious as a thick fog. It was difficult to ignore. Clearing his throat, ignoring the flush emerging in his face, Usagi gently nudged the fish towards his recovering friend. "You’ve been asleep for a while. How are you feeling? I caught some fish for us. You need to eat." The words almost ran into each other, tumbling even through the normal monotony and flatness of his voice. Typical Usagi. Overly concerned for those he cared for, yet his actions were a bit more refined than his words. He sat next to him, hoping the man would eat something. A minute later, Usagi’s akita arrived, gently placing a large bowl of water as well. Hydration was important, too.

Speech

wishing there was something left to lose

this could be the day i die for you—

The absence of warmth from his back hadn't gone unnoticed, but he hadn't been exactly aware of what it was until Usagi returned. He lifted his head weakly to look at the man, whom he could barely see with the light spilling in behind him. But he knew, even before he even spoke, that it was him. A fish was placed before him and he sniffed it warily, not certain he was ready to eat. He'd give it a minute, maybe he needed to wake up some more. He was feeling a little groggy still, anyway.

Before he knew it, could even process his own words upon Usagi's return, the man was speaking again but this time faster and without breaks. Kunai blinked slowly, trying to process what he'd said and creased his brows briefly. "I feel better, I think..." he trailed off a bit, confusion taking over his features as he broke his gaze from Usagi and looked around the den. "How long? Where are we?" He asked before turning his tired, mismatched gaze back to Usagi, concern and confusion creasing his brows. This wasn't the same den they had stayed in, that much he knew, but he couldn't remember the trip from that den to this den.

"Speech!"

Code © Skelle 2022

Usagi felt a bit more flushed in the face, the heat emenating as he chastised himself internally as Kunai began to speak. Damnit! I should’ve asked him first. Or at least explained what happened before running off. He was still confused, and understandably so. Usagi wondered just how much he remembered of their journey to Tojo-kai, but he could assume to some degree that Kunai didn’t recall much at all. It seemed he was aware they weren’t in Iga, and he remembered his near-drowning experience. Or so it was safe to assume.

"It’s good to hear you’re feeling better,"Usagi said, leaning back on his haunches to sit next to the chimera. He looked better..less feverish. At least, on the outside anyways. He was no healer, but he could provide the basics and whatever Kunai needed. Upon noticing the man’s confused expression and his glancing about the den, Usagi realized he didn’t remember their journey from that beach cave to Tojo at all. Brow knitted slightly, the Hohei replied, "You were asleep almost three days. There were times I thought you wouldn’t wake up, to be honest..you were so still." He trailed off, almost embarrassed that he was so worried for him. There wasn’t anything to be embarrassed about, realistically, but having been such a stoic character for a long time, exposing any emotion like this was a frightening step. But he truly, desperately was so anxious for his friend. His more-than-friend-but-maybe-not-officially friend. The thought of losing anyone close to him hurt his chest, deep within.

With a pause, Usagi was relieved to explain to Kunai their location. A less emotionally-charged topic. The bamboo filtered the sunlight that poured in from the sky, casting the softest golden-green glow upon them and their den. "We are in Tōjō-kai, a pack made up of wolves like you and I. Koi wolves. I vouched for you to join so you could receive medical care. Once you’re feeling better, I can show you the territory and see what you’d like to specialize in - hunting, or fighting, or anything else." He hoped he wasn’t saying too much, too fast - he didn’t want to overwhelm the guy.

Speech

wishing there was something left to lose

this could be the day i die for you—

Three days? Kunai frowned, tired brows pressed together as he tried to think. He'd been here, already, for three whole days? How long did it take to get here from the beach cave? He couldn't remember any of it and he groaned a bit in annoyance as his eyes squeezed shut and he rubbed his head with an orange paw. Dropping his paw, he looked back to Usagi with a frown and sadness in his eyes. Did he make him worry? Did he add extra work to the smaller man's day? Had he been a burden? The den smelled strongly of Usagi and he wondered if the man had opened up his den to him, or if the man had instead been spending all of his time caring for him in a hospital den.

"I'm sorry, Usagi. I didn't mean to burden you," he said softly as he looked away and down to his paws and the fish before him, frowning. This wasn't how he wanted to find his old friend, to get sick to the point his friend thought he was going to die and had to take care of him for a minimum of three days. He wished he could remember any of the trip here, to know exactly how long he was a burden to his old friend.

When he spoke next, the words sounded familiar. Usagi had mentioned Tōjō-kai before back at the beach. He could remember that much, and going to the den... but there was nothing after that until now. The absence of warmth he felt on his back prior suggested that Usagi had been wrapped around him, but he didn't want to get ahead of himself. He was probably imaging things and only pulled the blanket off his back when he moved. That made more sense, right?

"They'll let me stay?" his tone was a mixture of confusion and mild excitement. For whatever reason, he assumed word would have been sent back about him and sent him away, to return home. He had run away from Iga after all, though he doubted they really wanted him back if anything other than to punish him for running. His parents certainly didn't want him back. Was staying a good idea though? Despite his feelings for the man sitting so close to him, he would never forgive himself for burdening him. Of course he didn't stop to think that he would likely be dead if it weren't for Usagi taking care of him and bringing him back here, to his home.

Even if Tōjō-kai let him stay, wanted him to stay to pay of his debt, did Usagi want him to stay? Certainly the smaller man hadn't enjoyed taking care of him for the past three plus days. With mismatched eyes lost in thought while focused on the fish between his paws, he couldn't bring himself to look at the man before he asked a question he was afraid to know the answer to. "Do you want me to stay?" his voice was barely above a whisper, soft and somewhat sad as he blinked back the tears forming in his eyes while expecting the worst.

"Speech!"

Code © Skelle 2022

Kunai was still attempting to process all that Usagi told him, and the Hohei sat patiently - and worriedly as well - as the chimera rubbed his head. Three days was an awful long time, but he hadn’t minded it at all. Contrary to Kunai’s fears of being a burden, caring for his friend was the least he could do. The flop-eared koi didn’t have many friends growing up, basically secluded to just him and Kunai and Kuroo as his friends. He was isolated and ostracized for his appearance, mocked for his name - a great deal different than Kunai’s situation, but it was the reason, among many he couldn’t explain, that he felt more than content to care for his ailing friend. Usagi recalled the nights he curled into Kunai’s sleeping form, hoping he was warm enough. Trying to dribble water into his mouth when he was still unconscious, in an attempt to keep him hydrated. Constantly flitting back to the den he’d set up for them in between his duties and spars, making sure Kunai was still comfortable. But the thought of him being a burden? Not once crossed his mind. It was his duty, and honor to do so. And of course..being next to Kunai on those cold nights reminded him of how they played and ran around under the stars back home, free and wild. He remembered looking up at the stars those three nights, too, hoping they’d get a chance to view the night skies together again.

So when Kunai apologized for being a burden, Usagi frowned, shaking his head. "You never burdened me, Kunai. You’re my friend and I was worried about you. I stayed by your side those nights so you weren’t cold, because I wanted to." He volunteered to care for his friend, and for him there was no honor higher. Once Usagi had explained they were in Tōjō-kai territory, Kunai seemed a mixture of confused yet also excited. They wanted him to stay? Of course the Hohei did, more than anything. The man had vouched for Kunai when they reached the maze, and Hattori accepted them, knowing his friend was in danger of dying. Perhaps at some point, once he was recovered, he’d need to explain more of his backstory to the Kaicho - but for now, he needed to rest.

Do you want me to stay? He asked as well, and Usagi glanced down at his more-than-friend-but-not-really-officially-a-boyfriend, and his heart almost shattered as he noticed the tears welling up in his tired eyes. Oh, Kunai. His expression loosened, his shoulders slumped. Kunai staying with him was the best thing that could happen to him, along with Kuroo being with him, too. His childhood was playing back again, the good parts anyways. He wanted those days again. So depserately clinging onto the memories they had before. Usagi replied after some silence, "Of course I want you to stay, Kunai. It would be amazing to have you here. We can spar together once you’re well - or you can hunt with Kuroo down at the bay - we can do anything you’d like to do, really. This pack could use another warrior, or hunter, or whatever else you’d like to be." He paused, considering burying back the next words but they tumbled out anyways, "I’d..really like having you here. I hope that doesn’t sound too selfish." He felt the flush return to his cheeks - but he didn’t fight it. He loved him. He wanted him to stay. In the end, it was Kunai’s choice - nobody would force him to remain. But knowing the male’s history back in Iga, he had a feeling he’d like this home away from home. A home more welcoming than the one he’d left behind. And he had Usagi here, too. Perhaps it was selfish of the Hohei to feel that way, but he had to stop denying the fact that he loved him. So, so much. He couldn’t bear to lose him again.



Speech

wishing there was something left to lose

this could be the day i die for you—

So the absence of warmth he had felt was Usagi and not just his imagination. Despite everything confirming that his friend had the same feelings that Kunai had for the smaller man, he would never get the words his parents said to him out of his head and it made him second guess everything. Certainly the man had only wanted to help his friend recover and nothing more, because who would want anything more with another man?

Usagi continued and a weight lifted off of the chimera man's chest immediately, worried moments before that he would be forced to leave as soon as he was well or worse, forced back to Iga. Not only that, but Usagi wanted him here, too. He still couldn't get around the hurdle he, or rather his parents, placed before himself to do anything about his feelings, but it still felt good knowing that he was wanted here. There was only a moment of silence before he spoke again, admitting a deeper want for him to stay. His breathing momentarily hitched in his throat, but he wouldn't allow himself to think it was anything more than just friendly.

"Of course not," he started and cleared his throat before speaking more, but it was still dry. "I'd want to collect on saving someone else's life too." A lazy, toothy grin flashed across his face briefly but it was exactly that - brief. Despite being happy that he could stay in Tōjō-kai and that Usagi wanted him to stay (even if his own brain was telling him it was for platonic reasons), there was a sadness in his eyes still.

"Speech!"

Code © Skelle 2022

There it was again, that funny strange feeling that welled in his chest. His heart skipped a few beats after his words were spoken, carried on the wind that gently flowed through the bamboo stalks. He wasn’t sure what his next steps should be - should he say more? Maybe even express that deeply longing, suppressed feeling- no, no. Far too soon, even with his long they had known each other. Even after a harrowing reunion. His friend had just begun the recovery from pneumonia, and he had butterflies in his stomach? Such a conversation would have to wait. Those emotions accompanying it, too. But he knew, on some level, Kunai felt something remotely similar, the way Usagi’s words of wanting him to stay clearing having an effect on his expression, his pause, his inability to speak - no, that could just be the illness. Dry throat and all.

Kunai had cleared his throat, expressing that Usagi’s desire for Kunai to stay wasn’t selfish at all. The bunny-eared wolf felt relieved on that level. He knew wishing for someone to stay wasn’t inherently selfish, but he needed to get the reassurance regardless. After all, he didn’t want Kunai to feel like he was being pressured to stay in a strange land, even with their surroundings, their native tongue, and other koi-wolves reminding them of home. Without his parents ominously watching over him. But Usagi’s mossy gaze settled upon the flashing teeth and then the fading smile, the sadness in the man’s eyes. Oh, how he wished he could erase that sadness. His parents no longer had any bearing upon him except in his memories - arguably some concept of someone forever imprinted in one’s mind seemed worse than in real life. Because even thousands of miles away, the bad memories lingered. The shorter man, himself, had some demons lurking in the shadows - but he’d had yet to face them. They hid, for now. Kunai was his priority. After the pause, Usagi let his expression soften. Even his nub tail, so still and unmoving, he forced it to wag a little. Just as a sign of the enthusiasm he never knew how to express behind blank frowns and stoic eyes. "For what it’s worth, Kunai, I’m so glad you’re here." He never expressed such emotion even in his words, though his voice remained flat as it always did, it brimmed with warmth. And love. Lots of love, too. The love he couldn’t say aloud just yet.

Speech

wishing there was something left to lose

this could be the day i die for you—