Sleep. Wake. Sleep. Wake. The same cycle, over and over. It was monotony, but Hazel could rely on it. She could rely on the sleep, even when the dreams dragged her from it. She could rely on the waking, now. Fuck. Fuck waking back up. Did she even deserve it? Had she deserved the fever breaking, and Halo's tears of relief when it came? That had been a couple weeks back, now. Had she hallucinated Halo crying over her? Was that real? Were any of her memories of the incident, the time after it... were they real? Were they just a defense that her head assembled to keep her sane?

Was she losing her mind?

Maybe staying holed up in her den was part of the problem. Halo wasn't big on the idea of her venturing out alone, but the healer had slipped away from the sleeping yearling to get some work done. A healer's job was never done, or some shit like that. It seemed that Hazel's injuries had aged her, and for that too, she felt guilty. Still, now that the pale little shadow wasn't hovering around her, maybe she could finally go... somewhere. Where would she even go? That, and Halo would have her ass if she found out she'd gone alone.

Padding carefully into the space between their dens, she called out softly for the Warlord. Halo couldn't get mad if she was with Sirius, right? Something like that. "Dad? Are you busy?"

"Speech"

He was surprised to hear Hazel’s voice call out to him. The thrill of hearing her call him dad would never get old, and he popped his head around the corner to offer her a smile. She had been through a lot. She had fought her demons, and they had left her with scars. The wolf that came out the other side wouldn’t be the same one, but his love for his adopted daughter hadn’t changed.

“For you? I have all the time in the world” He teased lightly, coming further around the corner. He surreptitiously looked her over. She looked tired, and worn, but better. Anything was better than the fever… “What did you have in mind?”


"Speech"

There was something about fighting your demons and then having them fight back. Hell, it had to have been a demon that nearly killed her, right? There was no way that thing was a man... but then, she'd gotten half of her genetic material from him. What did that say about her? There was a far more complex debate about nature and nurture in here somewhere, one that Hazel didn't understand. Even if she did understand, even if she could understand... would she even want to? Would she want to understand? It was all Hazel could do to drive those thoughts from her mind.

As Seer (sir) came around the corner, though, she felt... better. Better than she had in the moments before, at least. At least with Seer around, she knew she was safe. There was nothing that could get her with him here. "Halo had to go um, do Halo things?" She began, "so I was hoping I could maybe get a little fresh air." A sheepish sort of smile, one that said she wasn't directly disobeying the healer but maybe... indirectly. "And um, if you come with me, then maybe she won't get... you know how she gets." A glimmer in her green eyes, Hazel is his daughter after all. A little trouble won't hurt.

"Speech"

The Warlord nodded wisely at the mention of Halo doing ‘Halo things’ though there was a twinkle of mirth in his eyes. He knew an escape attempt when he saw one. Hell, he’d been den bound for a few months with a broken leg. He knew what cabin fever looked like.

“I do believe I require your services, Hazel” He told her formallyl [/b] “As your alpha and father” [/b] He offered her his paw. “If you’d accompany your old man for a walk?” He asked her, his expression kind as he offered to take all the blame for her outing. If she felt strong enough to stretch her legs, he would take it. She needed to regain some of her inner strength, take charge.


"Speech"

The formality of Seer (sir)'s tone confused her at first, but it only took Hazel a moment to figure things out. A grin colored her expression, and then a faux-formal seriousness. In this, and in all things, she was grateful for the Warlord. Straightening her posture as much as her cramped muscles would allow, Hazel gave a regal nod. "It would be an honor and a privilege," barely stifling the giggle that came with the words. In honesty, it made Hazel feel more herself than she had in weeks. After all, what's a little rule bending to help her feel better?

"Where do you want to go?" She started toward the door to the den, turning to peer at Seer over her shoulder. Some things had changed, but there were so many that had stayed the same, too. For that, she was grateful.
"Speech"

“Excellent” He responded, breaking character to give her an amusement grin as they made their way to the door. Before exciting, Hazel asked what the plan was. “Let's head out to the cove to see how construction on the fishing hut is going” he half said, and half suggested. The beach territory was still new to the Armada. It was good to have access to a beach again, even if this one was far chillier then the one the pack had grown accustomed to.

She looked at Hazel as she peered at him over her shoulder, and gently ushered her out the door. He would need to consider starting her on training exercises to re-strength her muscles and test the limits of her healing body. But perhaps not today. Not her first day out of her bed, there were limits. And he didn’t plan to die in his sleep, poisoned by his faithful healer.


"Speech"

"Gladly," she replied, carefully making her way through the door. Already her muscles creaked and ached, having fallen into disuse as the rest of her had attempted to mend. Where there had been strength, Hazel would soon grow frustrated with weakness. Still, it was good to have fresh air in her lungs. She'd been dormant for so long... and still, sleep was at the top of her to-do list. Was it a need for rest, or something else, at this point? Maybe a bit of both. No stranger to pushing herself, why did it feel different now? Why did she feel different now?

Her steps were a bit uneven, and Hazel was far slower than she was accustomed to, but still she plodded along at her dad's side. It was nice, really. "I wasn't eavesdropping but um," she'd totally been eavesdropping, there wasn't much else to do when she was stuck inside like she had been. "Did I hear someone say that you made Lis the like, heir and stuff?" It was casual, conversational. That, and she really did want to know. It would be no secret that she'd missed her best friend, though even Hazel wouldn't realize that she'd been calling out for him in her sleep.

"Speech"

"Not I" he explained as they navigated through the Cole, and through the cave system that was the fastest way to the beach from the heart of the pack. Keeping to an easy pace that wouldn't push the healing girl as they walked. "That was Azure's decision. One of his first large ones as an alpha of the pack" and he trusted his son's decision. Basilisk was strong. An impressively large wolf, who had a penitent for friendliness that Azure lacked. But he was also brash and headstrong and didn't think before he leaped. Traits he hoped age and experience would work out of him. For now, the Warlord was content not to overwrite Azure.

"Speaking of rank, we should talk about your future aspirations. You've mentioned wanting to reach high in the pack. With some hard work to get your body in shape, you'll be there before you know it" he said, planting a seed to give her the strength to work through the weaknesses she'd discover from her long bed rest.


"Speech"

It had always taken two of Hazel's steps to match Seer's one, but this was different. This wasn't because she was short, and this wasn't a matter of simply moving faster to keep up.
No, this was different in a way that she wasn't the biggest fan of. Different in that, even though she wanted to truly keep up, Sirius was moderating his pace to keep time with hers. The Warlord's heart was good, and he seemed to be doing it in a way that wouldn't draw as much attention, but Hazel knew. She could tell.

It was Azure's decision. Lis's dad was an intimidating presence within the pack, and honestly? It made Hazel want to prove herself to him even more. Not that she'd say that part out loud. He seemed to her that, despite interacting with him directly, he barely even acknowledged her presence within the pack. He'd see, someday. She'd make sure of that. Again, not that Hazel would give that thought voice... but yeah, she'd show him. She'd show him that she was a worthy member of this pack... and maybe this family, too, even though she wasn't blood.

Though she was already beginning to ache in ways that she wasn't accustomed to, Hazel was beginning to feel better. At the question of rank, she could feel the spark in her chest begin to light once more. "I'm going to be the General, some day." She looked to the Warlord, this time in earnest. No mischief... Hazel was serious. She'd killed a grown man as a yearling, that had to spell big things... even if it haunted her, now. "I feel like I lost so much time where I should have been training, it's driving me crazy." But still, as they walked and talked, she could already feel the fatigue coming on. "Even while I'm like... like this. I want to learn more, big picture stuff and all." It's an admission, one that she hasn't been awake for long enough to make in the last few weeks. There had to be more things she could learn, more theory things... right?

"Speech"

The Warlord nodded his head, expecting nothing less of his ambitious daughter. If she wanted it, she would strive for it and work for it. He would be honoured to see her earn it one day. What he wouldn’t do was hand it to her. Once she took the position, she would know she had earned it by her own strength.

“Then you’ll just have to run a little faster to catch up. But your strong, and ambitious Hazel. If you want it, I can see you taking it” He told her. Not all of the Fatalis wolves had the right drive, and some that did had gone elsewhere. General was a position that needed filling, and he needed the right wolf for the job. Someone like Hazel. They arrived at the beach then, and he felt the dark sand beneath his paws. “What do you think of the cove?” He asked her. They had claimed it while she was recovering.

"Speech"

If she had something to do, somewhere to push herself, a direction, then she didn't have to let the other thoughts creep in. The things that she had nightmares about. The things that she'd worry about, now. The things that she saw when she was on the edges of sleep and waking, the things she heard. None of those things would have a chance to creep in. If she was busy, if she was working, if she was pushing herself... then those things couldn't get her. The demons couldn't reach her if she was faster. They couldn't hurt her if she was stronger. They wouldn't, they couldn't be too much, if that was the case. Hazel would just be stronger, faster, better than all of the things that threatened her-- no matter if those things were real or imagined. That's how it worked, right?

"Will you teach me what goes on, on your level, with raids and other... things like that? The planning, the strategy?" There was an excitement in her voice now, too. There was more she could learn, even while she was still healing. "Halo had me sorting seeds and helping make um, those kits for stuff? It's just... dad I don't want to waste more time." She was grateful for Halo, of course, and all that she had done, but there had to be something else she could to stay mentally sharp while she as recovering.

Beneath her paws, the ground went from solid to sandy. Before her, the landscape gave way to the Cove itself. "It seems nice... how's the fishing?" Hazel drifted closer to the water, dipping her toes in around the edges. It was cautious, curious. The water was cold, but refreshing. A shock to the system, but not an unwelcome one. "Have you been to that island?" It was a soft question, and Hazel knew that she wasn't yet strong enough to make that swim... or a strong enough swimmer in general, to make that happen. In time, though. All in good time.

"Speech"

“We can certainly discuss strategy” He agreed. He watched as she moved towards the waters edge. Placing a paw in the cold water. “It’s still a learning process. Different fish in these Northern waters” He explained. But the fishing hut was set up, and somewhat walrus-proof thanks to Keahi and Mercury. “I haven’t been out there yet” he admitted. He’d never been a huge fan of swimming, though he’d worked through that in his later years. It was however a treacherous swim in the freezing water.

“How about we start with crafting a weapon and talking about all the strategies in using it?” He suggested. It would keep both her mind and paws busy.


"Speech"

There was something comforting about Seer (sir) agreeing to teaching her. An affirmation, honestly. He would help her. He would be here... and that was the comfort she needed. Though Hazel wouldn't be herself for some time, at least she could still rely on her family. Family. Real and honest family. Though something under the surface had changed, Hazel was still Hazel, right? The girl could think so, at least. She could always think so. "Do they still taste good?" It seemed like a fair question, and if the fish sucked she'd never hear the end of it from Lis.

She nodded softly as Seer (sir) suggested a weapon. "What kind of weapon do you recommend?" The mind of an eager, ambitious learner had kicked in. That ambition coursed beneath the surface, thick and hot. She would learn. She needed to learn.

"Speech"