ultimately, inevitably
09-25-2023, 08:15 AM
Anyone else would have drowned. Their body to be found bloated and rotting, eyes sheened over and silver, never to blink again. And yet she lived and breathed, made it out without a whisper, found herself hiding away in the Willows, familiar yet different to what she remembered. More than anything she wished she could just turn back time, shed the years and effects they'd had on her body. Seasons had passed and she didn't feel quite so...shaky, instead a sense of bitterness had set in. Azure had used up her best years, consumed her youth and beauty and for what? She thought she loved him, loved their children but looking back she felt a sense of...entitlement perhaps? An old flame sparked, she deserved better than this, and almost dying had reminded her of that. She'd always, in some way, seen others as a tool to use, a pretty smile used to get so far but it seemed as though it counted for little these days. And that was unfair, it had to be, it felt that way deep in her chest like thorns digging into her flesh.
She used to be so wanted and had thrived off of the attention. But the Armada and the wolves who called it home just kept on doing their own thing, she'd been hiding away, sulking in the hopes that someone would notice. But they hadn't, not even Sirius who was clearly too busy fanning the flames with someone else.
Even her own children didn't care, perhaps they took after their Father too much. And she'd almost died giving birth to them, surely they owed her more than that?
She lingered by the waterside, looking down at her reflection and grimacing slightly at what she saw. The old wounds had healed, her skin all pretty and pink, but the disfigurements (yes a bit dramatic, it wasn't like she was beastly) remained, a bitter reminder of what she'd indured. What she hadn't deserved.
09-26-2023, 10:11 AM
The world was different. His place within it was different. Chimera's days were once filled with duties and obligations, leaving him busy from morning to night. His current state often left him searching for things to occupy his time. To say that he was going a little stir crazy would have been an understatement. His mind was all over the place and the two-toned giant was a bit more irritable than he had been for quite some time. Dalila was gone, his family was scattered to the winds. He had no power, no true home for his women or children. It bothered him. And so he walked.
Being displaced had seemed to put the normally confident brute in a place that he wasn't sure of. In his current state, it felt as though Chimera was just drifting through life. Each day he woke and left Ashen lands to walk... wherever. His paws led the way and Chimera just followed along. He didn't really look at his surroundings, the walking was simply to keep his paws busy. His mind was doing more exercise than his body anyway. He was a failure. A failure. A failure.
As he walked, a large paw splashing into water brought him back from his internal sulking. The man blinked, his good eye focusing on the land around him. It wasn't just the land, but someone else was here as well. Brows furrowed for a moment and then one lifted. "Hanako?" She looked a little worse for wear and her expression was one that matched his current thoughts. Chimera wasn't sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing, but here they were and there was no going back now.
Chimera is a very adult character and takes part in very adult situations. Don't read his threads. Ever.
Chi has three black Tibetan Mastiff's as guards. Assume they're very close by.
10-19-2023, 09:05 AM
(This post was last modified: 10-19-2023, 09:09 AM by Hanako. Edited 1 time in total.)
Hanako turned slightly, ears tipping as a familiar voice uttered her name. There was no judgment or resentment, we were both screw-ups in a sense and Chimera was better than her me in the regard that he didn't throw stones in glass houses. Moving away from the waterside she followed his scent, strong and masculine with the barest traces of the ocean. He wasn't hard to find, giving his stature and the way his coat stood out stark amongst the shadows of the trees. His figure strong and tall, accentuated by the sheer length of his legs. Dangerous with the flash of shark teeth behind his lips. She had hated him once, but in hindsight she had used him, in a way, as a tool to seek out comfort and reassurance, had used to make Azure fuss over her. And it had worked, those methods and means, for a time.
"Chimera. It's been a while." At least she had the mind to seem somewhat apologetic about that.
10-23-2023, 12:19 AM
The spotted fae soon made her way towards him. She looked better than she had the last time he'd seen her. She commented and he nodded. "It has indeed," he agreed. Because he'd noticed, he chose to share his observation with her. "You're looking more yourself than last we met." She'd been a bit of a mess then. He had too, but mentally rather than physically. "Are you ever going to tell me who hurt you like that?" Blunt as ever, Chimera was. He wanted to know and was terribly curious as to whether or not it had been Azure.
The willows shifted in the breeze as silence stretched between the pair. Silence had never bothered Chimera, but Hanako was a very social thing, to put it lightly. "Are you still a part of the Armada or have you cut loose?" He was an open book, so he expected others to be as well.
Chimera is a very adult character and takes part in very adult situations. Don't read his threads. Ever.
Chi has three black Tibetan Mastiff's as guards. Assume they're very close by.
10-24-2023, 08:15 AM
She hummed softly, not able to argue with his statement. She'd looked as terrible as she felt, and even though she'd never be able to reach the heights of her former beauty ever again, a combination of old injuries and age, she did look considerably better. Better than most women, she wholeheartedly believed.
"I wish I could, I'd sic you right on them and delight in seeing you use those fine teeth to bring me a trophy." In reality she didn't remember much of what happened, it was all a hazy blur, a lot of it accentuated with throbbing headaches. She sighed a little, his next question felt so weighted and she was a dainty thing, didn't like carrying anything, regardless of how heavy it wasn't. "You know how Sirius is, he doesn't like letting go of what he considers his. When in reality she hadn't even asked at all, had tried to fade away in an attempt to get some attention, to have someone chase her again.
And of course, her son had been the one to track her down. Sweet boy, but not what she'd been hoping for.
And Azure? Well, he wasn't half the man he'd claimed to be. Hanako's was childish in many ways, new shiny things excited her. And instead of his absence making her miss him, crave him, it only made her feelings towards him all the more sour. When he wasn't here to defend himself, it was easy to tear him apart, to question and wonder what she'd seen in him to begin with.
"I haven't seen Azure in seasons. He might be dead, might have just wandered off. I don't know." Either way she didn't seem so torn up by that fact.
10-27-2023, 05:52 AM
Chimera moved forward, getting into the woman's personal space a bit before haunches lowered to the ground. He towered over her for a moment before forelegs slid outward, the beast resting upon his stomach. Every motion looked so easy and practiced as though he was a man of leisure, which he was not. Work, and hard work at that, was what kept Chimera fit and mentally sound. Not having the amount of work that he'd had when running Fenmyre was driving him more than a little crazy.
Hana stuck with her story, telling him that she didn't know who'd attacked her. One brow arched as though he wasn't entirely sure that he believed her still, but if she wanted to stick with it, then he'd stop prying. She spoke of the Armada next, mentioning how Sirius didn't like letting go of what was his. A soft chuckle reverberated through the brute's black and white chest. "I can't disagree with him. I have a difficult time letting go of women as well, so I don't." He was a cad, a greedy bastard, and he embraced that fact.
Her view on Azure was amusing, but not at all surprising. Anyone who knew the man would understand how tedious his presence could be. Gods forbid having to live with him. A soft huff of amusement left the man and he shrugged lightly. "Perhaps now you'll find someone that will treat you as a woman should be treated." A little damaged, yes, but Hana was still quite attractive. Surely someone would scoop her up soon.
Chimera is a very adult character and takes part in very adult situations. Don't read his threads. Ever.
Chi has three black Tibetan Mastiff's as guards. Assume they're very close by.
10-30-2023, 05:05 PM
Hanako didn't feel threatened, even though on some level of reasoning she knew he was dangerous. That his shark teeth were not simply for show. She could see that though, she supposed there was a loss of face in giving something or someone up. An exchange that left them empty-handed, with a slight to their pride. And perhaps the years had made her unkind, maybe she'd been mean all along, but she couldn't help but look at the past through jaded lenses. There was so much she thought she deserved and it felt unfair that the world hadn't been laid at her feet. Some would say her best years were long gone, that she didn't have much of a right at all to be picky, but Hanako certainly didn't feel that way. She refused to, because if she didn't she'd be forced to listen to the music, to see the ruin her choices and inaction had caused.
"I should hope so." Hanako said, raising her snout, all haughty and proud, but not without a slight lilt of humour in her tone. In truth, she liked the attention, she'd wilted without it. Was it so wrong of her to chase the sun? "And I suppose you know a thing or two about how to treat a woman." It was a statement, with maybe just a tinge of judgement sprinkled in. She didn't know much about Fenmyre', but the time they had met he smelled of many a woman.
Though she also supposed if she could have gotten away with it, it wouldn't have been so bad for her to smell of so many men (or women) either, would it?
Her issue, dumbed down to its simplest form was that she was a cake eater. Couldn't keep it and eat it too, and in the end the cake had been smushed, then taken away. Leaving her with smeared cream and a mess to clean up.
"I doubt it though," she said somewhat airly, frustrating trickling through. "People talk and none of it was any good."
10-31-2023, 02:23 AM
Hanako spoke and he could hear the humor in her words. A low chuckle rumbled from Chimera and he flashed a little grin. "I do indeed," he agreed. "My queens are precious to me." He saw nothing wrong with living a polyamorous life and he didn't care if others saw an issue with it. The life that he lived worked well for him and it worked well for his women and his children.
Chi could see the gears turning in Hana's mind and she spoke of others having said bad things about her. Again, the man chuckled. "Can you blame them?" One brow lifted and his head gave a little tilt. "You haven't always been the easiest to get along with." Though they hadn't interacted much aside from their fateful run-in, Chi had heard stories and words from others in passing. Dealing with Hanako was tedious for most; especially for women.
The black and white behemoth gave a languid stretch, claws digging into the earth between them before his muscles eased once more. "If you don't like the way that things are, you're the only one that can change them." Was he hinting that maybe she could become someone that was easier to get along with? Maybe. Really though, Hanako's future was up to her. If she wanted to work towards it, she could have whatever she wanted.
"So what does the future hold for Hanako?" Again his head tilted. "What do you want in life? What's important to you?" He was hoping that she wouldn't bullshit him.
Chimera is a very adult character and takes part in very adult situations. Don't read his threads. Ever.
Chi has three black Tibetan Mastiff's as guards. Assume they're very close by.
10-31-2023, 07:09 AM
Hanako could and would blame them. Because at this point self reflection didn't even seem like an option, her life was like a stack of cards and if she took a moment to notice how fragile it all was-well, then she'd realised it was her actions that had knocked it all over. Her fault she'd had to start from scratch and rebuild. And for all her so-called diplomatic skills, she could be brash and thoughtless, it was no real surprise her story didn't have a happy ending. Why would someone like her even deserve that?
"Really?" She asked, sounding a smidge offended. Not in a hurt way, more in like he'd sneezed in her direction. "I thought you'd understand, we're really not the villains everyone paints us to be." And it was so easy for them to judge from their high horses, Hanako's pink nose wrinkled a little, her ear flicked in distaste.
She did suppose he was onto something though, to keep things as they were would bring her no pleasure or sense of fulfilment. She'd been demoted some time ago, and reasonably speaking she couldn't even blame Sirius for that choice. She wanted to though, she wanted to blame the world. It wouldn't kill her to play nice like she used to, she had a bunch of masks gathering dust somewhere in the recesses of her mind. But it felt a little too late, when had she gotten so old?
His questions were prodding, but inquisitive. She watched as he moved, her own rump coming to settle on the floor as she curled her tail to cover her hind leg. A chunk had to be removed since it had only been hanging on with a few strings of sinew and tendons, but it wasn't so short that it was too hideous. She hoped.
"Well I'm fed up of waiting, to be honest." Which again was a fault of her own making, the world was shifting around her but she stayed the same. Stagnant. "I want- hm." No one had really asked her that before, it took her back a little. "Attention. Security." She wanted her basic needs met, even if what she considered basic was different from most people.
11-03-2023, 05:01 AM
Hana sounded a little offended but that was fine. He hadn't been trying to spare her feelings. With as bristly as her demeanor was, she should have had thicker skin by now. She declared that they weren't the villains that they were painted as. Chimera's eyes went wide for just a moment, then he fell onto his side in the grass, genuine laughter, rich and masculine, issuing from him. "Sweet Hanako," he chuckled in his low baritones, "You may not be the villain, but I very much am." Chimera had done very bad things and he most likely would again. His moral code was darker than what was commonly acceptable and he had no issue with that. Those that did find issue with his ethics weren't worth his time.
The prone giant's tail swished in the grass beneath the willows and it was obvious that he was quite amused by the whole interaction with the mottled woman. It was interesting that Hanako was so easy to converse with. Chimera wouldn't have thought so prior to their reunion... however long ago it had been. The man was genuinely pleased each time their paths crossed. Funny, that.
Once his query was posed, Hana took a moment to think, then she answered truthfully. Attention. Security. Simple things. Had Azure neglected her that much? From his place in the grass, Chimera released a hum of contemplation. "It seems that we want some of the same things," he informed her. "I want to lavish my queens in love and attention. I want to watch my children grow. I want to be admired and loved in return." The man gave a little shrug, his tail thumping once in the grass. His pale pink eye watched the koi fae with interest. "Are you receiving adequate attention at present?" He teased her a bit, but he wouldn't be Chimera if he didn't poke at people now and again.
Chimera is a very adult character and takes part in very adult situations. Don't read his threads. Ever.
Chi has three black Tibetan Mastiff's as guards. Assume they're very close by.
11-03-2023, 07:09 AM
Sweet Hanako. She didn't feel very sweet, more so bitter. Sour enough to make you squint, your lips pulled taut. But she supposed she really hadn't seen the worst of what he was capable of, everyone had their secrets and actions they kept out of the light but she didn't think that quite applied to Chimera. He was brazen and shamless in his acts, but just because she hadn't seen it with her own eyes did not mean it didn't exist. The whole if a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound, line of thought.
She made a thoughtful sound at that, not disputing his words. Just considering, letting them sink in. Hanako sort of liked that he gave her food for thought, something to mentally chew on as a silence settled. Not uncomfortable as they settled, Chimera reclining so comfortably it hardly seemed as though he had a care in the world and yet Hanako remained upright, perhaps a little uptight even. Sitting proper and prim, like that would change a thing.
Hanako turned slightly, looking away through the density of the trees, only for her gaze to flicker back in his direction. Perhaps they were birds of a feather, in some way.
"Not really, no." Understatement of the year. The only one who seemed to care for her was her boy, Bas. And even then that came with a sense of betrayal, a reminder that love wasn't enough to be a good mother. That he needed more she simply couldn't provide.
And she'd been a liar if she hadn't thought at least once of just...doing it herself, you know? She was still pretty, she didn't think it would take much effort.
11-03-2023, 07:35 AM
The woman's answer surprised him for a moment and he let out a little huff of fake disappointment. "Apparently my conversation isn't enough for you. And yet, it's more attention than you'd get if you were alone." Chimera's feelings weren't hurt. His ego was the tiniest bit bruised, but that was no big deal. He was the king of pumping himself up. The man had women waiting for him at home. Top tier women who were loyal, held his heart and were perfect mothers to his children. He knew that he was attractive and interesting even if Hanako didn't.
"And what, pray tell, would be the adequate show of attention for Lady Hanako?" She said that she wanted attention, but it was obviously a specific sort of attention. If she expected the world to fall at her paws, then she would forever be disappointed. The world didn't revolve around her. It didn't revolve around anyone. From Chimera's experience, you had to make your own world for that to be true and he had done just that.
The brute stretched languidly, the muscles rippling beneath his black and white coat. A yawn pulled from him as well. "How about a nap, Hanako? I promise not to bite." Unless she asked him to, then that promise was off the table. He didn't think that Hana was the type for a bit of bite and tickle, but he'd been surprised before.
Lifting one big paw, the monochromatic giant motioned for the koi fae to come in close. She would fit so nicely against his chest. Would she be adventurous or would she continue to be stuffy? Either way, Chi was going to take a nap. He was much too comfortable to move.
Chimera is a very adult character and takes part in very adult situations. Don't read his threads. Ever.
Chi has three black Tibetan Mastiff's as guards. Assume they're very close by.
11-12-2023, 12:54 PM
She made an amused sort of hum in her throat, she'd give him that. Not many people talked to her these days and though her isolation in many ways was self-imposed, sometimes she just wanted to push through. To just do it anyway, as if they could read her mind. And whilst she was sure Chimera was capable of many things, she doubted that was amongst his repertoire of doable things. He then pressed on, seemingly unfazed by her difficult nature and posed a question that had her thinking, really thinking with furrowed brows and flicking ears. That was the thing, the crux of the matter, she didn't even know what she wanted any more. How much would be enough for her? To have gone for so long without could she truly be sated?
Hanako sometimes felt like there was a void inside of her, a gaping hole that meanness spilled out of. She'd stopped pretending she was a nice person long ago, the only person who made her feel good and kind had died long ago, only spoken to in dreams which were clearly her mind's way of trying to cope. To reach out to a past long since beyond her reach. And that was one of her many problems, she wanted the world to fall at her paws but it just wouldn't. It had for a time, when she was younger and prettier, or maybe it had just seemed that way looking through her rose-tinted glasses.
"I don't even know any more." She admitted with a huff, lips puffing out in an exhale. She faintly liked that he was listening, if nothing else it had been forever since she'd had a good vent. "Why do you even like me anyway? I thought you hated me." She asked instead, sort of maybe fishing for compliments?
They had spoken a few times since her incident, soft words and a settled understanding. Company without strings attached or anything other than quiet words beneath a night sky. She had pent-up energy, a desire to pace back and forth, only to pause at his offer, her head tilting just so. Wolves were social in nature, there was no harm in sitting closer, the night air was a little chilly after all, but nothing compared to the bite of the northern winds. She really hated the Col and resented the choice to move.
And so she came beside him, sitting close not in a show of affection but in the same way a catch would leach one's warmth. Used him as a makeshift pillow, elbows slightly digging into his side.
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