Dust clung to the surfaces within Siduri's modest tree house. She'd been gone for too long. The girl had walked in, taken a look around, and walked back out. She lay on the ground beneath the tree house, completely flat on her belly, chin on the earth between her paws. She didn't feel anything. Not happy or sad or anything in between. There was just... nothing. Sid thought that maybe she should sleep, but that wouldn't come either.

Ringed eyes of blue and gold stared straight ahead, wide but unseeing. If it weren't for the contrast of her bright white coat against the darkness of night, one might even walk right by her. Sid supposed she should tell someone about what was going on upstairs in her brain basket, but... why make someone else worry? Maybe Sakana would understand, but she didn't want to let everyone know that she was broken. Who would want to appear weak? Who would choose to be a victim? Damaged goods?

"Siduri"

Sakana had finished doing his rounds. He was eternally grateful for the help of the Hallows healers in checking in on everyone that needed checking on. Sid though, she still seemed... hesitant to get to the bottom of whatever irked her. And it was little wonder, she'd been through the ringer in short order. She might not want to be poked at and prodded, she probably didn't want to talk about her feelings either, but maybe he could offer a distraction under the guise of work.

He stopped by the treehouse first, opening the door and spying the dusty inside. Blondie wouldn't have it, and leapt down off his shoulder and set to tidying up, shooing Sakana away as she set to work, no doubt a little thank you for Sid's assistance with keeping an eye on Tar. He made his way down the winding stairs, spotting a smear of white against the dirt beneath the tree. He buried any worry under a casual grin, sauntering close enough to nip at an ear as if his noisy approach wouldn't have been enough to get her attention. “Y' seen what's under th' stones out in the moor yet?”

“Speech”

She smelled him before she saw him, the gentle breeze pushing the herbal scent of Sakana to pink nares. Sid watched as he climbed up and into her treehouse but the girl remained silent. A moment later, the earthen man exited, but Blondie stayed within. It was curious, but Sid couldn't muster enough... anything... to inquire.

Sakana spied her and came near, nipping gently at one of her ears. Sid lifted her head from her paws since it looked as though he wanted to converse. His question caught her off guard though. The pastel girl's brow furrowed and she shook her head.  "No," she answered, her voice a little scratchy.  "I've been... distracted." That was putting it simply.

"Siduri"

Sakana nodded when Sid mentioned being distracted. There had been so much going on that it had been a miracle he had spotted the opening under the leaning stone. "I haven't been down m'self yet, but it smells interesting, maybe we should check it out together? Y' can protect me from any bears that might be lurkin' down there," it was delivered with a teasing tone. Sakana often forgot how large he had grown, having always been the smallest around when he was growing up.

He flopped on the ground next to Sid without invitation, not minding if he got his ass bit for the intrusion. "So what're your plans for today?"

"speech"

coded by NachoMumma

As was his way, Sakana coaxed a smile from the young woman. He flopped down beside her and Siduri didn't mind at all. In fact, she curled her neck and used his big shoulder as a pillow for her chin. "Have to protect the weak, you know," she teased. They both knew that Sakana wasn't weak.

As Siduri aged, her mind became a more cohesive thing. Well... as put together as a broken brain could be, you know. She did realize that she didn't have to be at a hundred percent all the time, volume to the max. Maybe that was why she liked being around the healer man so much. He tempered her. Calmed her down. Gave her space and time to think and just... be.

He asked her plans and Sid gave a shrug. "I've been trying to stay away from everyone." It was no secret that she'd snapped off Jael's tail. It had been impossible to control herself and Siduri was mighty ashamed at that. "I don't want to accidentally hurt anyone else." With a little grumble, the pastel girl curled her neck and placed her forehead against Sakana instead, hiding her face in shame.

"Siduri"

Sakana relaxed as she threw her head over his shoulder and turned an ear to listen, his tail tapping against the ground in amusement, a grin offered to her comment about having to protect the weak. "Hey, I'm just a healer," he shot back, feigning a wounded tone.

He had noticed the way Sid had withdrawn after ripping of Jael's tail, he even allowed himself to smirk when she declared the incident an accident. "'S less than she deserved." He offered dryly, "I was surprised it was a coyote Mod gutted an' not the dog. Never really sat right with me." He shrugged. Sid had only been a kid when her mother almost died, and Sakana had been too busy trying to keep her alive to notice what was going on until it was too late. He'd chased the leader right across the continent to make sure she didn't undo all his hard work too.

He couldn't help but feel the peace that had fallen between Modesty, Gil and the pet was anything more than a temporary truce, but he wasn't going to question it, not with everything else that was going on around them.

"An' if y'do? Well it keeps me in a job doesn't it?" He offered Sid another smile. He had faith in her, even if she didn't.

"speech"

coded by NachoMumma

Sid had liked Jael. Enough so that she felt bad about hurting her. When the dog disappeared, however... well... that had soured her feelings for the woman. How dare she not only abandon Modesty and Gil, but the gaggle of children that she'd loosed upon the world? It was bullshit. Perhaps things would have been better if she'd removed Jael's head instead of her tail.

Sakana's comment about Sid keeping him in a job brought a small grumble from the fae and she nipped the side of his neck gently. "I want to be the one choosing to hurt people, sir." Sid had no issue with causing bodily harm, but she wanted to be the one choosing to deliver said harm. When her mind got all foggy, it wasn't her.

Siduri took a deep breath and placed her chin on the earthen man's shoulder once more. "I haven't really talked to anyone about my, uh..." One paw raised and she gestured to her head. "My... whatever is going on." The young lady adjusted herself a bit, bringing her mismatched gaze to meet that of Sakana. This literally brought half of her body onto his, paws draped over his side, hanging down onto his belly as she sat behind him."If I tell you... will you promise not to tell my parents?" Sid's brow furrowed as she silently pleaded with him to hear her out. She needed to talk about this.

"Siduri"

Sakana hadn't paid enough attention to realise the injury had been unintentional, so he simply flashed his teeth playfully in response to her nip, shoulder already rolling to flash the side of his throat and his belly in submission, even with her laying half across him. He nodded in understanding when she said she wanted to be in control of those sorts of actions, there was no judgement in the motion, just understanding and patience. He wasn't here to pressure her. Her mother had tried that in dragging her to the Hallows and look how that mess had all turned out.

When her head came to his shoulder once more he allowed his head to fall to the ground, wholly at her mercy. "I'm wounded that you think I'd tell," he quipped back casually, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips, "but if it'll make you feel better, yeah, promise."

"speech"

coded by NachoMumma

Sakana gave a little belly in submission and Siduri liked it. Like... really liked it. A soft little growl rumbled in her throat at the action, but she didn't have time to give it much thought. There were other things on her mind at the moment. Sakana flopped and promised not to tell after feigning indignation. An amused little smirk formed on Sid's pink lips as he pretended. Gods... how she enjoyed talking to Sakana. It was so easy.

He'd given his promise, so Sid sighed and flopped back down onto his shoulder with her chin. "When I hurt Jael, it wasn't me. My head starts to pound and things start getting foggy, then I'm just... gone. I didn't remember anything about ripping off her tail. It was like I woke up with her blood in my mouth." Sid's pink nose wrinkled as she remembered the event. "It's happened a few times since then. Like when we thought my dad had been killed. There's a lot of time in between then and now that I don't remember." It felt as though a weight had been lifted off of her simply by speaking her experiences out loud. "I'm broken, aren't I?" Blue and gold eyes searched the brutes face, searching for something. Any little sliver of hope.

"Siduri"

Sakana considered himself to be pretty good with physical injuries, but what Sid was describing was something else. He kept his face neutral, and ear turned towards her to show he was listening and when she was done, he shook off any concern that might slip into his words with a casual flick of his ear. He tucked an elbow and rolled back into a slightly more upright position. "Nah, not broken, but that must've been scary for you, huh?" He turned and pressed his nose into her shoulder reassuringly as he considered.

"I'm not gonna lie to you, mind stuff isn't my forte, but has it ever happened when you weren't stressed out? Maybe taking the edge off would help in managing it, if not curing it...? At least until we can figure something else out." Gods, he wasn't even sure she was looking for a solution. "Not that you need fixing, I reckon you're pretty cool just the way you are." He shrugged and offered the girl a shy little grin as he looked at her from the corner of his eye, grateful she had trusted him enough to tell him, regardless.

"speech"

coded by NachoMumma

Sakana heard her. He really heard her. The healer questioned her, asking if it had ever happened when she wasn't under duress and Siduri's brow furrowed. "Well, no..." Was it as simple as that? The earthen wolf suggested that she take the edge off, whatever that meant and Sid gave a little hmmph of contemplation. As she was thinking of how to 'take the edge off,' Sakana continued. Heat flooded the girl's cheeks as he complemented her, calling her "cool." Eeeeee!

Siduri cleared her throat, expression becoming stern for a moment as she tried to figure out what in the hell she was doing. Was he... flirting with her? Should she flirt back? Would flirting be considered trying too hard? Gods...

"I... think you're pretty cool too," the pastel marked fae began. "You're really easy to talk to and being around you makes me feel..." Made her feel what, exactly? They were friends. He had made a promise not to tell anything. So... she'd be honest with him. "Being around you makes me feel really good. It makes me feel important. Special."

There was a mental flashback to when she had kissed him when she was younger. Ugh, how embarrassing... But... Sid was a young woman now, almost fully grown. She had begun to feel urges and attraction and all that mess. Gods above, was she really going to do this?

Siduri slid her smaller frame over Sakana's so that she was seated in front of his belly rather than behind him. Reaching forward, she placed one pink-padded paw upon his cheek, tilting his muzzle just enough so that she could lean forward and place a kiss upon his lips. This was nothing like the peck she'd given him so long ago. It was soft and gentle and she poured all of her emotions into it. Siduri pulled her lips from his, backing away just enough to speak in soft, whisperish tones."Thank you, Sakana... for just being you."

"Siduri"