Uneasy Paws: Hurt - Johnny Cash
Drop It All: Hell Song - Sum 41

Uneasy paws carried the man across the ground. It was early in the morning, and the could was still clinging strongly to the world. It was a crisp morning. The already past the horizon and shining it's light down on the earth. And with each step, the knot in Newol's belly grew tighter. Word had finally reached his ears that his family had returned. Far too long and far too late. Every second he'd lost one he knew he'd never get back. But that's not what filled him with dread. What he hated was the fact that he was going to see his mother. His adopted mother. The one that had taken the lost little stray in and made something out of him. Set him on a path that would lead to him turning into something. And that woman could make him do anything.

He bore the name Adravendi now. And he bore it proudly. In his heart, he was still a Zaraidd. Defiance still ran hot through his blood. But he was a grown man now. He wondered if she'd even recognize him. He stood strong now, propped up on legs layered with muscle that hadn't been there before. On him sat a layer of built up fat from eating daily in the prey rich East, his thick winter pelt starting to fill out on him. All together it made him look very healthy. And Very handsome. Especially with the care he'd taken to groom himself well for this occasion. But despite all the change, those three scars still sat there atop his snout. The Lady in Red, that gorgeous Queen Temptress he'd been mesmerized but upon his first entering of Alacritis, She'd put a vision in his head. And it was working towards that dream that had made him a sturdy bastard. Newol was determined to one day build a pack. He longed for it dearly. Craved it, woke up and drew breath for it. Especially now that he and Serra where together. Oh how he wanted to give that woman the world. He wanted to set her atop a throne and be the first to bow to her as his Queen. And then after that take the mantle of King. All these things that he wanted and was patiently working toward. They had become his purpose in the absence of his family. But now, time had brought him back to his mother. That originally being the only thing he really wanted, once upon a time.

But... Now... Now, Newol was a man. And he carried with him his dreams, propped atop his broad and strong shoulders. And that was what filled his belly with dread. Oh, he did his best to hide it, his face calm and neutral in the soft and warm morning light. But that didn't hide that it was still there. And knowing his mother, she'd probably see right through him and find it in there. There where other things hidden there too. Other painful feelings that he'd sworn he was over and that he was trying very much so to keep locked away. Things he didn't want to be present upon this reunion. Painful memories of him bellowing into the walls of the cavern that had become his den one simple, painful, and ruthlessly unforgiving word. Why? Why did she have to leave? Why didn't she warn him. He would have gone with her... But in all honesty, that wouldn't have done any real good because he wouldn't be the wolf he was now.

And then there was the anger too. It was so embarrassing to be angry and someone you loved. He was ashamed of himself for it, but he couldn't deny it happened. Newol had lost a mother not once, but twice. Twice, his world had been rattled to it's core. It was a difficult thing. It made it hard to trust anything, or put faith anywhere other than what he could do with his own paws. Oh, how hot his blood had run those first weeks. He'd wanted blood. He'd wanted to wage a bloody war across the face of Alacritis. Very few understood just how low of a point it was to wake up one morning and realize that you just wanted to destroy something beautiful. You just wanted to see something burning. And this was perhaps the cruelest notion of them all. But it had already been proven. When the monsters thrashed enough, the only thing they succeeded in doing was making a monster that wanted to eat them. But this was not Newol. Not anymore. He was a stronger man then that. It was still there though. The scar still present on his soul. He'd been burned by Viridian's flames. There was still the makings of a tyrant buried deep within him. The difference was that he'd die before he let it see the light of day.

But none of this was the key source of his dread. No. The Dread buried deep with Newol's gut was from something much, much more meaningful. All his hopes. All his wants and dreams. The desire to built his pack, the desire to make his Serra a Queen. Everything he was preparing himself for both mentally and physically, every single thing he was.

He would drop them all. And the only thing Erani would have to do was ask.

Right now losing them was worse then going through all of this a third time. Right now, all he wanted was his mother. It was a childish want, yes. But Newol had a right to that childish want. Because he'd grown up in the wilderness. All alone and on his own. Right now the only thing he wanted was his family. And this time, he would cling dearly to their side and not allow himself to be shaken loose again. And if he had to give up everything he'd become, so be it. It was a choice he'd have to make. And make it he would. Newol was an Adravendi now. His children would be Adravendi. It was a foreign name to these foreign people, Zaraidd. But one look and the very high pedigree that Newol was, and it was painfully obvious that it wasn't just a hollow and empty name. For six generations now, Zaraidd has been the name of fire, and fury. The name that descended down like a crash of thunder and rumbled across the plan to devour you. It was Honor. It was Violence. It was Defiance. It was a rising and loud wave of noise that wanted to consume everything in it's path.

And he released his ties to that bloodline. Yes, he was proud to have been born a Zaraidd. But now. Now he just wanted to be an Adravendi and be with his family. To be, finally, in both body and soul, Home. Because where or not she'd nurtured him within her own womb or not was completely irrelevant to him at this point. The woman had claimed him, and he'd accepted. And that was that. That was the end of that chapter. Newol wasn't a stray anymore. And he would never be again. That was Final. And that was his mother's gift to him.

So finally, he made his way deep enough by his figuring. So, dread or not, he lowered himself into a seated position on the dirt under paw. Then, he tilted his head back and rose his maw up to the sky. As he did this his eyes closed. And, at last, his voice rang out into the crisp morning sky, as he sang. He sang to his family. He sang to his mother. He sang to his friend. And informed them of his return. For he was Newol Adravendi. And there was nothing that was going to change that.

all our lives are drifting like ghosts inside empty houses She had been scarce, if not entirely absent for too long. With her siblings' return, Serra had felt herself to be unwanted and unnecessary - the kind of insecurity that she had never faced before. But it had been her and Quelt against the world for so long and then Sheikra and Pamela were back and Wael was around somewhere, right? And suddenly Serra wasn't all that Quelt had. Irune stood at his side and her siblings had gathered around their massive brother and Serra was standing on the outside. Serra wasn't proud of it, but she had left. Her paws had carried her away from Isokan and she had sought the comfort of Newol as much as she could, but she did not dare return to her family, not now. Not after being gone for so long. Who was she anymore anyways? She certainly wasn't Serra Arrow - not after abandoning her family. And Serra Walker hardly fit her anymore for the same reasons. Perhaps it was time for her to abandon all surnames - but no, that wasn't right either. Family meant everything to her and she took pride in her family name. But it felt like she didn't deserve that anymore. The slate colored woman found herself tangled up in knots, her thoughts chasing themselves in circles. There was nowhere to go to escape from the guilt clawing at her thoughts - not until Newol's voice raised up and over the horizon, reaching platinum colored ears. For the first time in she didn't know how long, Serra found herself stirring, head lifting from her paws as she pricked her ears towards the source of his voice. Suddenly she found herself too aware of his absence and Serra rose to her paws with more energy than she'd remembered having since before her siblings had returned. Before she had time to fall back into lethargy, Serra forced herself to move forward, paws moving mechanically as she strode forward. It didn't take her too long to make her approach and then Serra felt a smile stretch across her maw as she found her gaze settling on the familiar form of her love. Instead of speaking a greeting, she padded silently closer and moved to press herself against Newol's side. As long as he did not pull away, her body would lean against his comforting bulk and Serra closed her eyes for a moment, a soft sigh escaping her as she nosed lightly at the other should he allow it. Speech,

And but who should appear first other than the woman for which he longed. Serra. The one who held his heart in her paws. Newol hadn't seen her for a few days and had wondered where she'd gone off to. But he wouldn't question her. Not now. Now there where more pressing matters at hand. He knew she had troubling matters on her mind what with her family and all, and cared not to pressure her. But her presence at his side was always a welcome thing. So when she leaned herself against him, he supported her. Glad that she was once again at his side. He was a desert wasteland rouge. One of fire and fury. And it was not easy to set at the side of such a person and he knew it. So in all honesty, he was greatful to her. She'd given him a reason to stay when he'd had none. Nothing but bad memories and lost faces. And then there was her. This beautiful slate gray woman. If he had to survive off of that alone it would be more than enough.

So, reaching down, he placed his nose atop her head and breathed in a long drag of her scent, placing his paw atop hers. His voice was soft and quiet, barely above a whisper. "I'm glad your here. It shouldn't take them long to find us." And that was all. No questioning. No anger or disappointment. Such was the effect of a woman's touch. Had it not been for her he might have stayed his war path and sought to wage war and spill blood once he had his pack behind him. Not anymore. And with her at his side, facing his own family would be much easier for him too. She hadn't been required to show herself for this little venture. But she had none the less, and he was thankful for that.

So, planting one last lick atop her snout, he opened his eyes again and brought his gaze back up to the trees before him, wondering who it would be that greeted them first. It had been too long sense he'd stood among their ranks. But he was here now, and ready to be counted. So, a serious expression settled on to his face as he realized that there was a matter that needed to be addressed first. He didn't have much time, but he had at least enough to give her fair warning. "As always, I ask nothing of you Serra. But I am an Adravendi. So for now my home is among them. I plan to stay, at least for the time being. And you are welcome to stay with me, if you want. And as always, I will love you ether way." He didn't mean to sound so serious. But he knew this exchange had to be brief. Such was the nature of the situation. Newol didn't complain about the hand he was dealt though. What time he had was time enough.

here's the first of many songs you wanted me to write , Serra pricked her ears towards Newol as he spoke, still drawing comfort from the male's strong presence. "I am glad too," Serra murmured, voice slightly rough with disuse. How long had it been since she'd said anything? How long had she dwelt within her own thoughts? It had felt like an eternity and no time at all at once. Presumably, however, it had not been too long, as Newol did not seem to have been worried by her absence. That was good. She would not have wanted to worry her love - Serra could take care of herself after all. And moving had done her some good, it seemed. She could feel energy returning to her veins as she stood at his side, tail slowly waving. Silently, Serra would allow Newol to speak once more, listening to his words. She hesitated for a moment on her answer, knowing instinctively what she would say but doubting herself in the seconds that followed the answer springing to her tongue. Could she leave her family without saying goodbye? Hadn't she already done so? Did it matter where she stayed if it wasn't with Isokan? But all of the second thoughts in the world couldn't keep Serra silent for long. "I will stay, of course. I have not returned to Isokan in a season - it is not my home any longer." To say it like that gave it such finality. Could she truly make a life away from Quelt and Sheikra and Polly and Wael? It seemed as if perhaps she might be able to - and maybe she already had. She would have to return to her family at some point and inform them that she was all right, but Serra was in no rush. She could not comprehend facing them just yet. For now, she would stay by Newol's side and gather her strength once more. Before long, she would tell them that she was all right, of course. Serra could not, in good conscience, leave her family wondering about her wellbeing - even if she doubted that they had missed her much. Speech,

Erani

The light was slowly growing in the small cave of depression she?d been trapped in. Taurig was alive, and back. Her family was about her, and had grown thrice more in the forms of Regulus, Zuriel, and Faite; her grandchildren. However, there were still pieces of the puzzle that needed to fall into place. Where were her other children? Epiphron, Chrysanthe, and Newol? Preston? And her grandchildren via Epiphron and Chrysanthe? Odette, and all of Epiphrons children, including Quintus. In a way, she knew better than to try and impose on Syrinx? children as their grandmother. However much Syrinx may have accepted her care as a second mother when he was a pup, he had never called her ?mother?. Eos had been gone so often, and been so bitter the last time Erani had seen her, that she knew she wasn?t considered a mother to Eos in the females mind. Thus, she had little right to call herself grandmother to their children. It didn?t mean she never wondered where they all were now. Syrinx was gone again. For good. That was as much as Surreal would say one night after meeting Arian. Eos? Perhaps she had always been gone for good. So her mind turned to the others. Azalea, Sarak, and whatever children they had, and Obsidian. A low huff left her. ?I need to get back out there and figure out what is going on with those ones?? It was a mutter heard only by her own ears. However, quite abruptly, one question was answered for her. A howl filtered through the willows, the boughs long since stripped of leaves by the fall season, swinging bare from their branches over the river. Newol was back. She took off at a swift lope, careful of the frost rimed waters edge as she bounded toward him. She slowed as a second scent mixed with his. A female. A moment later, she broke through the willow fronds into the open, picked up speed, and barreled for the brown male. She braked just before a collision might have occurred and looked him over in the manner of both healer and mother. ?Newol. I?m glad to see you.? Her tail waved behind her, as her eyes met the male?s emerald gaze. Then her eyes turned to the female next to him. ?And who is this?? There was no chill, only a warm curiosity.

Ooc;// Ugh, I apologize for all these yucky emotions. But you know I don't fight posts. I just let them form.

Limp Bizkit - My Way

Her words brought a warmth to his heart. To regain both Serra and his family at the same time, what more could he ask for? All those lonely days out in the wilderness. All those days spent alone in the dark of the Mountain's Deep. They where all finally over. Newol had enough to keep himself content for the time being. And then some. His love would stay at his side. True, he felt sorry that she had fallen out with Isokan. It had been her home and the location of her family. It had been what she knew. And now she was without that. But she was by his side, so she would be fine. Because this was the wilderness. This was something he knew. Something he'd known sense the day he was born. That was perhaps the most poetic part of it. Newol had been climbing sense the day he was born. Up hill, one direction. He still had a long way to go and he knew it, but he was proud of how far he'd managed to come. With Serra at his side, to hold close and wrap himself around and hold tightly, he could bear any hell that may come. Musing his words as he held her up where she leaned against him, he responed to her. ?Thank you.? It was a simple response. But it was all he felt he needed to say. Life was a cold and bitter affair to have to go through alone. He knew that well too. And he didn't have to do it anymore. The all at once, the wolf who had been called for appeared. The white female who had claimed him. The Healer Erani. She erupted onto the scene before even a moment could be given to ponder the fact that it was her. And with her sudden appearance, a storm of emotions erupted underneath his pelt. Everything that he wanted to keep buried tried to jump forward. All the painful bits. A part of him wanted to bury his face in her side and cry and apologize. Another wanted to bellow at fury and march off into the hills and wage a fekking war for her stolen throne. And another wanted to just ask her why? Why did she have to leave? Ah, but he caught all of those emotions quickly. His eyes closed as a breeze met him, ruffling his thinker than normal fur. Dropping his snout to aim at the ground, he inhaled slowly. Long and deep, filling up his chest as his ribcage expanded. Then, slowly, he exhaled. Calmly, he gaze rose once again to meet this woman before him. He wondered how different she'd find him. Hell, he hardly recognized himself sometimes. Newol had changed and he knew it. The last time he'd seen his adopted mother, he'd been younger. More care free and hot tempered. Before he had been Energy. Now, now he was Fortitude. Lowering his head in a bow of respect to the woman, he then returned it to its original position and settled a calm expression on his face. For a moment, all he could do was sit there and look at her. Like looking at the ghost of a good dream you'd had once a long long time ago. How long had he hoped and looked? How many days spent growing stronger in the wilderness? And finally, here she was. Was this real? Or was this another bad dream spawned from a heart drowned in longing? No, he had to be sure that this was real before he let himself slip into his emotions. So, stepping forward with one paw, he rose to all fours and advanced to her. Then, reaching up with his snout, he gently brushed it against hers, feeling to see of his passed through her like a ghost. When he didn't, he pressed his forehead against her shoulder and once again took a long inhale of air, a sigh of relief flooding out of him. He could touch it. It wasn't an aberration created to haunt him. Softly, his words left his maw. ?Your real this time... Mom.? At once everything was replaced by content. He had his lost family back again finally. Not once, but Twice now this world had turned him into a Stray. He wouldn't let it happen again. "Burn Baby Burn"

i had a dream the other night about how we only get one life , Newol's thanks were enough for Serra to wag her tail a little more, a smile touching her maw as she leaned up to nudge his chin lightly. "Of course," She responded lightly, voice soft as she settled back to wait. There was nothing else for Serra to say - she had told Newol all she needed to already, and she felt no need to speak any longer. Until the situation changed, Serra was content to wait in the peaceful quiet. The wolf that Newol had called for was a stranger to the slate colored woman, but she had not lived in these lands for nearly long enough to form an opinion on all of the wolves that lived here. There would always be strangers - but for as long as Serra had her brother and her companion, she could not imagine being lonely. It was as Serra thought that another exploded onto the scene. The white wolfess raced straight for Newol and Serra's instinctive reaction was to bristle, her hackles raising and her lips pulling back from her teeth in a silent snarl. Sheer shock was the only thing that allowed Serra to show so much emotion so fast, and as soon as the female stopped and spoke Newol's name gently, Serra felt all of the tension relax from her frame. This must have been Erani then - and hastily, Serra felt an apology form in her maw. "I do apologize for my reaction. I was . . . ah, shocked, though that does not excuse my actions." In the light of her almost growl and in the face of a stranger, Serra found herself drawing upon her training as a pup and speaking like the royalty that she still identified as. "You must be the Lady Erani?" Looking faintly guilty, her blue gaze flicked towards her paws as she spoke. Ah hell. She had probably had such an awful first impression - her mother would have been disappointed. Sighing internally, Serra pricked her ears towards the woman, waiting for a moment before the introduction would be necessary. "My name is Serra Walker. Again, I apologize." It had been an unacceptable reaction, though perhaps an understandable one. After all, how else was one supposed to react to a presumed attacker racing straight at them? "Burn Baby Burn"