Puppy Love
04-15-2013, 12:05 PM
He couldn't stand this. If this was love he wanted no part of it. The agony, the pain, the torture, was it really worth the few moments of glorious bliss that sometimes - but not always - followed? He'd known this was coming, knew it from the start that one day they'd be torn apart, wrenched from each other's sides , forever to live their life by their families codes of conduct. But what if he didn't give a damn about that anymore? What if he wanted her, and her alone? Lately she's all he could think about, lately.. she was everything that made up his mind, his body, his soul. Forget being Prince, forget becoming King. What did it all mean if it meant giving up on her? It was plain and clear that nothing would ever be so painful as this, and half of his mind screamed at him to just run, to turn around and flee and forget about love and life and happiness. To go home, crawl back to his father, be his perfect little puppet and one day rise to wear the crown of Seracia. But what use was a crown without a queen? What use was it trying to hard, being so good, working so fervently if he had nothing to show for it at the end? Sure, he would be remembered as a King, would be remembered as part of the legacy of the Mathias family, but who cared about the Mathias' if he couldn't even bring forth heirs to further the lineage? Oh sure, his father would probably see to it that he had grandchildren one day, but the thought of having children with anyone but the woman screaming her head off of him at this very moment seemed horrendous. Children? Had he really gone that far in his thinking, to imagine the pitter patter of little paws on Seracian grounds? Who was to say she'd even want to come to Seracia? It was painfully clear she was tied endlessly to Valhalla, and he to his Kingdom. So what was the point of it all? What was all of the agony for, if not a relationship laid to waste? She retorted, but her words were all but lost to him. Sure, she hadn't said it, but she'd sure as hell meant it. Snarky comment caught in his throat as he remained silent, brooding. He would shift his weight, fidgeting where he stood while she formulated another reply, this one as biting as the rest - but even more so since it had been his exact thought. Do you really think a crown could make me forget you, make me give up on whatever the hell this is? I don't care what Seracia would think of me running off to find you, we can cross that bridge when we get to it, but I'll be damned if there's no point to this madness.. There had to be a point, there just had to be. To quote your words, 'this is just as difficult for me as it is for you'. He would utter with a far more emotional tone than before. You're on my mind every second, do you know that? Even when I'm supposed to be doing something, accepting someone, or making myself productive. You have never once left my thoughts since I first laid eyes on you. I get distracted, I daydream, I think about the future, I remember the past. Epiphron, I don't know what this is but I know it's real. It hurts, it stings, and it makes me want to just give up but then I don't, because I remember the first time we met, the first time we kissed, the feeling of when you wrap yourself around me. Damn everyone and everything else, Epiphron. I. Want. You. He huffed as he finished, not realizing the serious lack of breathing he'd experienced while voicing his feelings. It had all been a blur, and he hoped to whatever god there might be that it was coherent enough for her to understand. He wanted to rush forward, to embrace her, to give every part of himself that he hadn't already given to her, but he stayed still. Mav speaks, pip speaks, |
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