Waiting For The Inevitable
04-19-2013, 05:05 PM
(This post was last modified: 04-19-2013, 05:38 PM by Chrysanthe.)
Quote: Erani seemed to have wanted to be left alone, so she did so at first. Yet she couldn't help but seek her out. The yearling paused, hearing her soft words as she neared her den. The girl could barely make out her speech, but as she closed in on she and the familiar figure that she was speaking to, Chrysanthe paused, her heart breaking as she heard the healer's whisper. She never should have survived... the girl wanted to jump immediately, no matter that she was speaking with her father. There was no reason, none at all that she should feel that way! Yet her father did nothing to quell her, only spoke with her as if he was punishing a child. She held back the growl that wanted so badly to seep into the air that separated she from her father. His words cared about nothing, no one, but Collision. The eldest child, the alpha, the lord, the king. He was all that mattered, he was all that he considered in this, his feelings, how he felt about being questioned in his own damn meeting! What a king, to need to have his father defend him against a pregnant woman. What a fucking lord, to have to have the woman he stripped of rank be chastised by his father.
She was disgusted.
"You could have told me how common that betrothals were father, before you had me married off and prepared to ship me away." She said quietly, no harshness to her tone - only emptiness. Her "mental strength" was the only thing that kept her from snapping, from complaining, from crying and demanding that he remove himself from Erani's den because she was too important to her to be treated this way, and too pregnant to be stressed out like this so soon before her pups will do. "I apologize for interrupting your conversation - but Erani wasn't speaking against anyone. She was asking questions about Glaciem, about Neo, her child - and about me. They were questions that you may not have wanted public, but he made a public issue when he addressed them to the pack." He could argue with her all he wanted, coddle her, punish her, but it would all fall on deaf ears. She was apparently too free a spirit for this, for all of this - but she would destroy it. If only so that she could play the role that she had been given, and marry the Seracian prince that she had never met. "I would have been more hesitant in challenging for Neo, had I known that he would be treated this way upon return." She looked down, shame flickering over her eyes and visage, before she lifted her head once more.
"She would not have simply sat there and let you give me away either if she didn't know about it, she is my mother. She loves me. Just as she loves Neo. She was worried for me ... for us. " The girl would meet Cairo's gaze, before moving to sit beside Erani. She was so sorry - the pain just wouldn't end for the healer, and it was all her fault. From Collision's actions at the meeting to Cairo's appearance and nonchalance to her feelings here. She had mothered his children and he cared nothing for the pain that she was radiating before him. A past king that she so revered, the father to her children, and he was treating her as if she wasn't a part of his family at all. "You shouldn't have stood up for me Erani - it's costing you so much, and it isn't fair." She whispered, and for the first time since she had appeared, emotion actually showed in her voice. Bitterness, sadness, compassion - she was so sorry that Erani would have to deal with constant punishment without her rank and herbs and healing and students, for saying things that were on the beta's mind that she couldn't get herself to say.
"Father, I don't ask that you consider her feelings - but the lives of her pups. The stress could very well kill them." if you continue to break her heart. He had certainly done a good job in breaking hers. He had known about this, he had known that she was going to be sent away and hadn't called to her immediately. Chrysanthe loved him, loved Collision, loved her family - but she was entirely disappointed in their lack of care for she or her feelings. They only assumed that she would take the news well and moved on, because she was strong enough to keep her feelings to herself.
"As for me I will serve Seracia's Prince well, so please don't worry about me." Those words were for Erani more than they were her father. He hadn't stopped to think that she may be upset about this in the first place, he was fine. And she found no reason to upset him as she had been upset. With that in mind she pulled her blank expression into something more serene. "I am strong, I'll be fine." That was what she had come to tell Erani in the first place. It was all she wanted her mother to know. That no matter what she would perservere and fulfill her duty to her family. "But I will miss you both dearly." It was the only overwhelming feeling that made her heart wrench painfully in her chest. Knowing that Valhalla and the Adravendis were a thing of the past to her.