Starling Destruction

OOC Name: Keno

Keeping Items: Stella the Starling and Herb Pack.

New Personality :

Starling is a wolf who has grown tired of being tired so to speak. This is not to say the problems that he had with his family and friends are going to magically be fixed. But Starling has decided, once and for all, that he is not giving up any more. He is not going to give up on himself. It has taken a lot of pounding through family and friends to get this sort of message across. Starling has finally come to understand that no one will value and respect him if he doesn’t value and respect himself first.

This is not to say that the boy is no long self-conscious. If anything he is more self-conscious than before. His mind is a constantly working process, reminding himself that he is enough and all he has to do is keep going to show himself {and everyone else} that is the case. He will remain soft-spoken, yet, when it comes to herbs and healing he has a firm and level head. He can remain calm under times of pressure.

Starling is intuitive when it comes to learning about herbs, but he seems to lack the natural street smarts for fighting. He is aware of this weakness and does his best to be careful in everything he does. He will be more mindful, trying to make sure he doesn’t talk about himself too much. He will tend to be overly apologetic. He will have a pessimistic view about himself for a while longer until he can finally prove to himself what others already see.

On another note Starling is a kind-hearted wolf, through and through as well as well mannered. He wants to help others and takes his job as a healer very seriously. He cares truly for each patient and is still terrified of failure, though he has realized if he thinks he fails before he tries he will. He is not generally aggressive but shows a protective nature over his family. When in the company of those he values Starling can become easily embarrassed. The bad nerves he seems to have been born with will stick with him, making him feel tense around others from time to time. This may be something Starling overcomes with time and the right conditions.

Plans :

--Starling is going to realize he has to push himself to overcome his own weaknesses. He will keep moving forward, pushing to listen to the words that his family has told him time and time again. It is likely he took a little time for himself in the beginning of Winter to get to this conclusion. Star is tired of being tired. He knows he has to work towards change and mending not just the wounds of his packmates but his broken relationships as well.

--Staying In Abaven

--Still Friends With / Crushing on Cathaoir

Roleplay Example :

When Winter first hit Abaven lands Starling knew he had to do some thinking. He was tired, yes, so very tired. But more importantly he was tired of being tired. He had made sure that all the previous patients afflicted with the viral pneumonia had been treated or were in a stable enough condition before he locked himself up within his stores. Laying around his herbs Starling had thought really long and hard about what his family had said to him, what they had been saying to him. He thought of his own actions. He thought of how everyone interpreted what he did. He thought of Cathoair and he thought of change.

Starling knew that things had to change from the way they currently were. It couldn’t go on like this. If he kept thinking he would make mistakes then he would. It was jinxing himself. The only way to break out of this endless cycle of self pity and regret was to keep pushing forward. He had to keep going not just for his pack’s sake but his own. He had to overcome the biggest challenge of his life and mend the things he’d broken; his relationships with others in the pack.

“Stella...” Starling called to the little bird. She was never really far from the den though. She came inside, landing upon his bag before she looked up at him. “Are you done moping?” Stella had been reminding Starling of all that his family and friends had said. Reminding him that he was good enough. He had to make himself see it.

“Y-Yeah...” Starling gave a small nod. The little bird gave a nod. “I just need more time... I need to turn this around before I crash and burn too. I don’t want to end up like the others who truly failed Abaven... Those who abandoned it. This is my home... My family... My friends... I can’t abandon them.” His words held a new tone of confidence as Starling rose to all fours.

“I’m going to speak to my father. If you could... Go check on Finch for me?” The young man asked. He still had images and nightmares of her... When she was dying. It was Finch and her near death experience, as well as Sparrow and Bass’ words in particular that had struck home. He had a long path ahead of him... But no matter how hard it was to walk along that path...

...he was going to keep rolling.