Starling Destruction

OOC Name : Shelby

Keeping Items? Yes to both

New Personality : Starling is a wolf in recovery from himself. He has spent so much time and energy learning how to heal the physical ailments of others that he forgot to learn how to care for his mental ailments. He cares so widely and so deeply that he sometimes doesn’t understand how to handle all of the emotions that swirl inside of him, distracting him from what’s right in front of him. He’s learning how to do just that so he can clearly see the love that is getting reflected back at him. The path to recovery isn’t an easy one, but he has come to learn that anything worth having isn’t easy to attain.

He is so bright and intelligent, able to pick up things quickly and remember things as if his mind is a vault for all things healing. Even though he’s learning to move past this fog that has held him down for so long, he still feels the most alive when he’s in the zone of healing. That is his true passion and finds the most comfort in the challenge and the mental stimulation of it all. It makes him get out of his own head for a moment and puts his focus solely on the one that he is healing.

After the turmoil his own mind has put him through, he has gained a new kind of strength from the experience. It gave him a new kind of appreciation for other’s anguish and the pain that they may be feeling on the inside rather than the outside. He hopes that through his own struggles he can find the knowledge to be able to help others that are going through the same things. He is sure that he can’t be the only one to have these internalized problems. He wants to be the wolf that others can rely on to listen to their problems and help them work through it if they want his help.

His family is his world and the entire reason he worked so hard to find his way out of his depression. He relies heavily on them to keep his head above water, but at the same time he wants to be someone they can rely on as well. They are the reason he is still alive and well and so loved. Now he just has to learn how to let that love in and really feel it deep in his soul now that the walls his own subconscious put up are gone.

Plans :  I definitely want him to stay in Abaven if for no other reason than to be with his family. He’ll probably want to apologize for everything, but even more than that he’ll want to work and prove that he truly means it and show that he’s here to stay. It’ll be a long road of recovery and mending bridges, but he’s ready to put in the time to do that. I’m absolutely willing to keep any plots with Cathaoir open as well. I’m sure Starling will want to mend as many of his relationships as he can, Cathaoir and Quake included.

Roleplay Example : Starling’s ears twitched and he lifted his eyes from the ground between his paws at the sound of fluttering wings. His eyes landed on Stella, standing on the ground in front of him with several leaves of lamb’s ear grasped in her beak. A small smile touched his lips and he spoke softly, ”Ben fatto, Stella. Grazie.” His friend dropped the leaves at his paws before taking off once again, in search of some other herb to add to his bags. A sigh passed his lips and he lifted his head to look up at the sky. It was a surprisingly clear day for it being so far into winter. The winter in general had been mild and that was something he was certainly grateful for. This time on his own would have been much harder if he had to deal with the elements working against him as well.

A breeze kicked up and he let his light blue gaze close to enjoy the light wind tossing his fur. He had to go home. Slowly his eyes opened, his vision full of blue sky. He had to go home. His head tipped back down and he bent to pick up the lamb’s ear Stella had brought him so he could tuck it into his bag. He had to go home. He thought if he just said it to himself enough it would make him actually go.

He just wanted to make sure he was really ready. There wasn’t going to be another chance. That was a lie. He knew his family would never completely turn him away if he continued to leave and return like he had. At least he thought he knew that. He just didn’t want them to have to keep giving him second and third and fourth chances. He wanted this chance to be the real one. He wanted this one to count. He wanted to walk into Abaven with his head held high knowing that he was going to make himself better for all of them. For his father. For Finch. All of them. He breathed in, filling his lungs with the chilly winter air, letting it out in a slow sigh. ”Calm down,” he thought to himself. If he worked himself up over this he’d end up right back where he had been.

He pushed himself to his paws and turned back toward Abaven, glancing to the sky to make sure Stella had seen his movement. It was time to make things right.