-1 Why is Hera worried about Riv grabbing her tail? If she's using her right shoulder to attack his left side then her tail is nowhere within reach
-1 “She reached for the area around the middle of his ribs...” Because the rib cage is so large I'd have liked to see a little more information here.
7 for powerplaying.
-1 “She made her way toward him...” This should have been attempted
-1 “...as she got into close quarters with her opponent.” Assuming your approach is successful
-1 “After her attempt at slamming her shoulder into his side, she shuffled her back paws to her left...” You're not giving your opponent enough time to react.
10 for defenses.
+1 for each seen to max of 10.
2 for attack.
+1 for shoulder throw
+1 for nip
10 for injuries.
First round.
Hera's round one total: 37/50
RIVAXORUS II: 4 for clarity:
-1 “With a strange dance he wanted to make sure that he kept parallel with her.” What exactly is he doing?
-1 “The front edge of her shoulder would collide with the bottom of his left fore shoulder where it connected to the lower leg...” Hera was aiming for right behind his foreleg. How did the blow get shifted forward?
-1 “As he seemed keen on trying to keep them parallel with each other his back paws would attempt to shuffle as she did.” Which way?
-1 “The male sought to hook his left limb around the elbow of her right...” Her right what?
-1 “Tilting his head to his left he aimed his upper jaw to her upper back where he could reach, tail moving to his right side to help with his balance.” Where on her upper back? It's a fairly large area.
-1 “His lower jaw aiming for just before her right limb where her ribcage was wanting to possibly grab a hold of her.” Which right limb? I'm not sure if you mean the side of her neck or right in front of her hip.
10 for powerplaying.
None seen!
10 for defenses.
+1 for each seen to max of 10.
3 for attack.
+1 for hook
0 for push
+2 for grip
10 for injuries.
First round.
Rivaxorus II's round one total: 37/50
ROUND TWO
HERA: 9 for clarity:
-1 “...she attempted to slam her right paw down into the toes of his right forepaw.” Front or back?
-1 “She took a step toward him as she did so to make it a bit easier to reach him.” Sidestep? Forward step? I think just a little more info is needed here.
9 for powerplaying.
-1 “She took a step toward him...” This should have been attempted
10 for defenses.
+1 for each seen to max of 10.
4 for attack.
+3 for bite
+1 for stomp
8 for injuries.
-2 for moderate lacerations to right side
Hera's round two total: 40/50
RIVAXORUS II: 5 for clarity:
-1 “He using his back right leg to turn himself once more.” How exactly?
-2 “Lifting his upper limbs in an attempt spring at her shoulders in a firm push.” What's he trying to hit her with? His paws? Is it a stiff-armed shove? Because this is an attack quite a bit more information is needed here.
-1 “Jaws opened as his head tilted to the left...” Whose left?
-1 “Jaws opened as his head tilted to the left aiming for the portion of her neck just between her shoulders.” If he's trying to shove her away it doesn't make much sense for him to be reaching for a place that is a whole neck and head length away, especially if he is using his forelegs in a stiff-armed shove.
9 for powerplaying.
-1 “Her jaws clamping shut firmly on the middle of his chest.” What changed to make her bite land here instead of the side of his neck? Simply turning (in either direction) shouldn't change the height of the bite
8 for defenses.
+1 for splayed toes
+1 for raised tail
+1 for distributed weight
+1 for raised hackles
0 for shoulders rolled inward to make self more rigid (don't understand reasoning)
+1 for rolled scruff
+1 for pinned ears
+1 for narrowed eyes
0 for pulled back teeth (not possible)
+1 for scrunched face
5 for attack.
+2 for shove
+3 for bite
2 for injuries.
0 for scratched toes (minimal damage)
-2 for moderate lacerations to chest
Rivaxorus II's round two total: 29/50
Totals:
HERA: 77/100 RIVAXORUS II: 66/100
And the winner is...
HERA! Rivaxorus II must give up by either submitting, fleeing, or passing out.
Damage:
At this point everything has healed!
Notes:
Tips for writing and some suggestions. (no points are deducted here):
For both: Nothing to note, really. Shelby, you improved noticeably in the second round! Good job! Riv, pay attention to stream of consciousness style sentences in a fight as they can really mess with your clarity and lead to confusion. Good fight, guys!
