Breaking Me Down
Tanaraq flew a few miles in search of the male's daughter. From her vantage point in the sky, she was sure she'd have no trouble in finding the girl. But it was also night time, and had the girl not responded to her father's howl then Tan was sure she'd have more trouble finding her target. Luckily, however, as she drew closer to the territory, she spotted a pale figure below. Could that be her? The way the wolf paced made it seem like she was waiting for something, so Tan would quickly glide down until she touched ground a few feet away. "Are you Finch? Your alpha sent me to bring back supplies." She peered at the girl, her tone serious. She wasn't sure if she wanted to name the patient that needed help, so she opted to keep it anonymous. "My friend is injured, your father is with her. She has a bad shoulder wound, and many other wounds that are bleeding. We've used moss to staunch the worst of the bleeding, but it might not be enough" She thought for a second, thinking that perhaps Avalon could use something to calm her down as well. "And if you have anything that might calm a distraught creature, that would be of great help." She would wait paitently, and should the girl need anymore information then she would provide it.
The tears would not stop. Why? It was a question that didn't need an answer. She knew why. And the more she kept thinking about it, the more her heart shattered. She didn't know why she hadn't run to Vereux. She didn't know why she hadn't sought out his comfort instead of running away. But perhaps, somewhere in the back of her mind, she felt like she just couldn't. He was more broken then she was, what could he have done? There was nobody else in the pack she could turn to in a time like this. So she ran away. And when Bass touched her neck, his voice soft and soothing, she would close her eyes as her head turned to seek the warmth of his chest. She rested her head on the ground, her head sitting between his forepaws as her face pressed into his fur. She didn't want him to see her this way. She didn't want him to see her cry like this. But maybe it was already too late for that? "I...had a fight with Lykos..." She murmured. Her voice slowly gaining just a little but of control, though still shaky.
"Mercy...she...she was right...I'm not a worthy alpha...Lykos...he betrayed my trust...he kept...twisting everything I was saying..." She recalled the confrontation. She recalled everytime before that. Not once had he truly understood anything she had said. He chose to twist her words into the worst possible thing he could think of. Making her seem like everything she was doing was wrong. "Everything that was said...my heart kept breaking..." She moved her head away, pulling back as her brows furrowed. She recalled the look in his eyes. The coldness in his voice. "I could see the hatred in his eyes...the coldness in his voice...he said he would rather follow a girl like Mercy...that I wasn't worthy of following...so I told him he would no longer be the heir..." Her lip began to quiver, eyes squeezing shut again as her head shook back and forth. "I did everything I could to raise my boys right! I loved them to death, even when their father abandoned them! I tried so hard to make a good life for them...what did I do wrong?" Tear filled eyes looked up at the cream male, a look that seemed to be begging for answers that she was sure she'd never find. "What did I do wrong?"
She wouldn't wait for an answer to that. Her throat tightening again as her body began to feel the effects of pain and exhaustion. She recalled the last time she'd talked to Bass, his question ringing in her head. She supposed the moment she had, was what he was talking about. "Remember...when you asked me, if I had felt the pull between mother and alpha...?" She took a shaky breath. Trying hard to keep her voice steady, but it seemed the more she thought and talked, the more it wanted to falter. "I felt it..." Tears fell again, just when she thought they would go away. "I tried so hard Bass...to make them happy...to find happiness...but every time I try...every time I think I've found it...I feel like it's torn away...Ivalice wasn't enough for them...everything I tried wasn't enough...they won't even let me try to be happy..." She dropped her head to the ground again, eyes squeezing shut as she took a shuddering breath. "Maybe...I don't deserve to be happy..." She'd whisper, throat tightening as she thought about everything in her past. Nobody else knew what she had gone through. Nobody else really knew her story. It was a burden she had lived with her whole life. But she felt like she couldn't carry it anymore... |
