Gotta stop holding me the way you do
12-01-2016, 02:53 AM
Gethin honestly didn't know what he was expecting from her for an answer. If someone asked him his prefered reaction would be for her to just agree and tell him that those few initial nights together had been a fluke, that she had been caught in the moment and she didn't really mean it. That would have been a painful sort of relief in a way. Sure, what little of his heart was there would have been shattered to dust, but at least then he could toss out these emotions and questions and just go back to his old ways without remorse. That's not what he got though. He got screaming and yelling and questions that she never actually wanted him to answer. Scared. That was the word that stuck to him like a thorn stuck in his paw. Out of all the furious screaming words she threw at him that was the one that hit him the hardest. He didn't respond at first. He stood there in silence, knowing that if he tried to retaliate it would just get worse. He had to let her play out before he could get a word in edgewise. Every muscle was tense across his shoulders and back, his jaw clenched as he fought back against himself. For a moment he thought she was going to just walk away after all of that when she took a few steps away from him, but suddenly she stopped and jerked a clump of grass out of the ground so she could shake it apart. That made him pause for a moment, blinking at the reaction without a clue how to respond to it. She sat down without facing him and he stood there for a moment while he let it all process. That was part of his problem. He didn't know how to process these emotions or how to explain what he was feeling. Neither of them did really. At least that's how it felt to him. He padded up behind her after a moment. He didn't go around her to face her, instead just standing behind her while he tried to form words to say. "I don't want breakfasts at a romantic creek or overly sweet kisses," he began, slowly setting himself down on his haunches. "But I know there is more to you than just anger and lust and teeth. If you can manage to see past my fucking twenty foot walls and see some tiny, insignificant shred of good in me then I can do the same to you. I get it. I get that you're fucking scared. So am I! I've been scared that I was going to lose you from day one. I've been scared that one day you're going to figure out that I'm so worthless that I would give up my life and my soul for the first woman that could stare my past and my nightmares and shit in the face and not even flinch!" His voice was so heavy with emotion that he wasn't sure he could get the rest of his words past his throat. He forced himself to his paws and walked around her so that he was facing her again, whether she met his gaze or not. "You keep saying that all these wolves left you and it keeps happening, but I've been following you around for ages now, Mercy. Always there to lick your wounds and fuck it better and make sure you eat something before you fall asleep. Just so I can keep you alive because I would die with you if you did. When I told you that you can have all of me almost a year and a half ago I wasn't fucking kidding. When are you going to fucking see me, Mercy?" I stand a hundred feet, but I fall when I'm around you. "SPEAK" |
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