You Only Zing Once
Zola vs Phoenix for Force Breeding | Dominance
ROUND ONE
Zola:
WRITING
8/10 for Power Play:
- Attempts
-2 you need to attempt this "Her knees bent as she came close enough to him" you don't know that he's going to let Zola get that close
- Godmoding
- If/Than Statements
- Excessive Movement
- Realism
8/10 for Clarity:
- Attacks
- Positioning
- Directions
- Movements
-2 how is raising on her hind limbs helping her attack? Pheonix is much shorter than her, this negates much of her attack
- Damage
3/10 for Attacks:
5/5 for Defenses:
- list valid defenses up to five
10/10 for Injuries:
- list injuries (even first round, deductions beginning second)
Status
3/12 for Experience:
- +1 Beginner Fighter
- +2 Novice Intellect
4/5 for Health:
- pack status
- unhealed event status
- unhealed fight status
Zola’s round one total: 41/62
Pheonix:
WRITING
10/10 for Power Play:
- Attempts
- Godmoding
- If/Than Statements
- Excessive Movement
- Realism
10/10 for Clarity:
- Attacks
- Positioning
- Directions
- Movements
- Damage
4/10 for Attacks:
- +2 headbutt
- +1 paw wrap +1 topple
5/5 for Defenses:
- list valid defenses up to five
10/10 for Injuries:
- list injuries (even first round, deductions beginning second)
Status
3/12 for Experience:
- +1 Beginner fighter
- +2 novice intellect
4/5 for Health:
- pack status
- unhealed event status
- unhealed fight status
Pheonix’s round one total: 46/62
ROUND TWO
Zola:
WRITING
4/10 for Power Play:
- Attempts
-2 you need to attempt this "hugging him with her front legs" -2 this also needs to be attempted "but she would hold onto him"
- Godmoding
-2 You did not address Pheonix's paw attack
- If/Than Statements
- Excessive Movement
- Realism
4/10 for Clarity:
- Attacks
- Positioning
-2 where on his body is she trying to hug him with her front legs?
- Directions
- Movements
-2 I don't follow the motion with her left shoulder, is she trying to drop it on him? Is she rolling off him?
- Damage
-2 how much damage did the headbutt do? Any bruising? Loss of breath?
4/10 for Attacks:
- +1 shoulder… thing
- +3 bite
5/5 for Defenses:
- list valid defenses up to five
10/10 for Injuries:
- list injuries (even first round, deductions beginning second)
Status
3/12 for Experience:
- +1 Beginner Fighter
- +2 Novice Intellect
4/5 for Health:
- pack status
- unhealed event status
- unhealed fight status
Zola’s round two total: 38/62
Pheonix:
WRITING
10/10 for Power Play:
- Attempts
- Godmoding
- If/Than Statements
- Excessive Movement
- Realism
8/10 for Clarity:
- Attacks
- Positioning
- Directions
- Movements
- Damage
-2 how much damage did her jaws do?
6/10 for Attacks:
- +2 hold leg while opponent unbalanced
- +3 bite +1 grip
5/5 for Defenses:
- list valid defenses up to five
8/10 for Injuries:
- minor bruise to forehead
- -2 moderate bite to space between shoulder blades
Status
3/12 for Experience:
- +1 Beginner fighter
- +2 novice intellect
4/5 for Health:
- pack status
- unhealed event status
- unhealed fight status
Pheonix’s round two total: 44/62
Totals:
Zola: 79/124
Pheonix: 90/124
And the winner is...
PHEONIX! ZOLA must give up by either submitting, fleeing, or passing out.
Damage:
Too old to matter
- By Lunarcat7
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