And How He Waits

It was getting to be one of those nights again.

Those nights seemed to be becoming more and more frequent, the sleepless nights where he tossed and turned in the fine gravel dust on the floor of his den until his fur was coated in dirt. The nights where his thoughts were plagued the hunting party he led to find the cougar that had killed his fellow beta, and how their hunt took them to the cliffs where they found their leader strolling to the sheer end and dropping like a stone into the sea. The moment he knew he would no longer be a beta to a man that believed and trusted in him. The moment he turned to the only person outside of his pack that had been kind to him, and how it had all culminated into what he was now. Old and childless, cursed by pain that never seemed to stop and despite finding a pack that seemed to suit him; alone.

He sneezed and rolled onto his paws with a snarled “Bah!” and slipped out of his den. Walking always seemed to help, and he always seemed to find someone whenever he did, which did help, it at least got his mind off of things for a time. He made a point to mark one of the trees on the Fringes of The Maw before he slipped down the cliffs, heading to the Rock Garden.

He hoped that one day Crew would be large and formidable enough to loop the strange valley into their territory as well, if only so he could go on his strolls while still being in the safety of the pack. He did love The Crew, truly, and he respected Chaos as a man who could keep the trains running on time while keeping things light hearted and entertaining, but they were so small. Or felt that way anyway. If he were a higher rank he’d find wolves left and right to join them. If he were a beta he’d see that all of Chaos’s grand schemes came to fruition. If only he were. “Ef iffs ‘n buts waer candied noots we’d all hev a marry Yule.” as his mother used to say. He never quite knew what “candied” meant but just assumed, like so many things his mother said, that it was from before his time.

He roamed the Rock Garden aimlessly, the last time he did he’d found a young man, this time…Well hopefully this time he’d just find someone to talk to. maybe even Is- He bit down n that thought before he could even finish it. He didn’t even want to entertain the thought. He couldn’t.

This is talking