nothing left to lose

Long ago, she probably would have been offended at his surprise at her condition, and at her age -- she'd been a lot of things, once. It amused her to think of all the things she'd once cared about, things that she now hardly even gave a moment of her thought. Time had taken its toll on her, and finally the physical signs had caught up to her change in mental state. Somehow she'd taken it all in stride, no longer fearful of death's embrace; not that she particularly longed for it, either. It simply.. was what it was, and dwelling too much on it would do nobody any good. Any worries she'd been feeling, pushed back somewhere beneath the fatigue and her waning consciousness, were all but erased as Kassander forced a slow smile in her direction. If she'd met him when she was younger, if her heart hadn't been given away so long ago, she was certain she would've fallen head over heels for the sweet Xanilov.

Somehow, it didn't surprise her to watch him wearily as he crept closer, moving to curl tightly against her. It'd been a long time since she'd been touched by anyone so tenderly, and she felt her own body wracked with a shiver of delight at their sudden and unexpected closeness. She wasn't too proud to lean into his touch, not any more, relishing his warmth against the coldness of the earth and of the wood on her other side. Even his scent was comforting, familiar after all these years, and she breathed a heavy sigh of relief.

"Tell me what you've been up to since I last saw you," she requested, wishing her voice didn't sound as weak as it did. Lying here and being cloaked in silence sounded much less appealing than hearing Kassander talk. She truly hoped he'd been faring well, that he'd found somewhere to call a home again just as she had, and even if he had nothing at all to say she hoped he might make something up to satiate her need to hear his voice and forget everything else for just this moment.