No child of ours should have to die for us[gabe and Raph(?)]

A life without sin. That was all he dared ask. Yet, it seemed that he might not be worthy. Everywhere he went, the stench of mortal sin followed. Clung to his skin like a stain that couldn't be cleansed. All he wanted to be was the perfect son to his Father. To be a perfect guardian. For his family to be free of strife. It was not meant to be. Why couldn't he be pure, unsullied? What had he done to deserve this suffering? Would Father ever forgive him? It was his only desire in life, to bask eternally in the Lord's light.

He trailed after his Fallen brother. Nostrils flared with each breath, making minor corrections to remain on track. Skull hanging limply between his shoulders, he walked on, trapped in his own psyche. The sharp aroma of deciduous sap stung his nose as he approached the forest of mammoth trees. Soon enough, he could hear Samael. Could smell the tumultuous emotion in his musk. He put on a brave face, lifted his crown high to direct his attention to his brother. The very image of a holy man.

"I don't know how to make it better anymore. I cannot kill them like Father wants, they are my world, they are innocence in my eyes. I can't just accept that because I sinned they are to be condemned. Mine are mine and belong to me, why must he divide us so? I cannot stand to watch my family tear itself apart because I fucked up." The words rang clear in his emptied skull. A heavy sigh was forced from his lungs. He did not know either. The violence of his heartbreak tightened in Gabriel's chest, made it hard to breathe. Choked him. He couldn't force words from his jaws, not now. Not faced with this sorrow. He couldn't, because it was his fault. "I want you to come with me, Gabe. I would do anything to have you by my side."

That was something he could respond to. He knew the truth, the right words to say. "You do not want me, brother." The words rumbled from his aching jaws, clear as a bell. He was so tired, so drained. He wanted to rest for millenia, awaken a deity in his own right. Far removed from these traumas and these old wounds, constantly reopened. "I am no good to you." Worthless, even. Michael hadn't even seen him worth enough to ignore his sins. He bore the marks of his own folly, and he was reminded of his horrible existence with each breath.