I wanted to seek, I got distracted

*Ashiel* · 09-15-2018, 02:05 PM

ooc: Open to Malleus, Serene and their pups

Panting, Ashiel set the young pup down at the border. His lungs burned and he shivered lightly as the wind picked up, carrying rolling bands of fog with it. As the tendrils of white swooped down upon him the moon became obscured and the night was shaded even darker. He didn't know how to feel. He'd spent a lovely evening with a spirited, snow-pelted woman named Leshia who was dwelling in the Whisper's Gorge before she made her way north. It wasn't until the morning after that the realization of their actions had hit them. At the time Ashiel could barely conceive of the idea that they could have pups. He was young, it'd been his first time but even so they'd agreed to meet again and see what had become of their tryst. Ashiel hadn't thought much more about it. He fell into his life as a leader and then it was one thing after another until he started having visions.

A mewling cry caught his attention, he bent his head to nuzzle the pup gently before picking her back up in his jaws and crossing the border. He'd been late in arriving at the gorge. The pups had been born by the time he'd gotten there. He'd only seen the two living pups but according to Leshia there had been a third but.. she'd lost it during birthing. Ashiel couldn't help but feel ashamed of that. Surely with the strength held in his blood they would have all been born perfectly healthy. He came to a sudden, harsh reality. It was like getting slapped in the face by a grizzly bear. The visions he'd had, the return to the old ways, including the culling, suddenly became harsh realities. He'd had to cull the second born pup. There was no way around it. The poor creature was unable to use his hind legs and Ashiel knew he would never be accepted as an Abraxas but even so it was far more difficult to take care of the situation than he imagined. Even now he felt like he was going to throw up. He'd taken the child out of sight of the mother but he was sure Leshia knew what had happened.

He was left with one strong daughter who hadn't even been weaned. Ashiel had planned to take both Leshia and the pup back to Risen but she'd refused. She couldn't stand the thought of the child knowing her, and she had no desire to return to pack life. So Ashiel had taken the girl, and prayed that Serene would be willing to take care of the girl until she was fully weaned. He knew he should feel some joy at fulfilling this part of his family duty, of having a child to call his own but the overwhelming emotion was fear. He had so much he was still trying to sort out. Could he really raise a daughter?

More than ever he wished his mother was here but Pyralis had been lost to the flood and was probably dead for all he knew. Gently setting the girl down on a clump of moss he called gently into Malleus and Serene's den. He hated to disturb them this late, especially when they had five children of their own to wear them ragged, but he needed to speak with them.

"Talk" "You" Think

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