Too Old For This Sh*t

*Valentine* · (This post was last modified: 10-09-2018, 09:11 PM by Valentine.)

Valentine cocked his head and eyed the inquisitive pup. "Listen here, you little gremlin," he said in the same tired tone of voice he'd used on his kids when they were young and exhausting. "I bet I have nine times the life experience as you. You might think you're being helpful and shit, but you don't know shit about shit, so how about you save the pep talk or guilt trip, or whatever this is, for someone with fewer years and a little more patience?" Where were this kid's parents?

The old king rolled over so he could look at the boy without craning his neck. He lay sphinx-like with his long, bushy tail laid out behind him, the end twitching from side to side like a cat's. Valentine wasn't quite sure what to make of the kid. Had he been a touch more crabby he might have just pushed the kid into the river and gone about his day, but as it stood he was just tired and feeling his age. He envied the boy and his youthful naivety. He envied the years he had ahead.

But, just because he envied him didn't mean he was going to jump to his feet and take care of the kid. Nope. Not his kid, not his problem. "I do," he said without moving a muscle. "Does your momma know how to feed you?"

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