I'm just the boy inside the man

I'm just the boy inside the man
Not exactly who you think I am
Trying to trace my steps back here again
So many times.

He had been staring at the lake for long, his mind drifting from his reflection and his thoughts to memories. They moved through him, a montage of pain and bittersweetness. He remembered all the times he was too angry to think, and all the times he wish he did. Remembered the moment he had left Donostrea because he didn't fit in, only now to see that he had refused to fit in a place that was perfect for him. Everything slipped by, slowly, every moment he wished had never happened, and every moment he wished had lasted longer. That storm he and Shaye had watched should have lasted forever.

He was broken from his thoughts by his name spoken so sweetly on a voice he had never thought he'd hear again. And for a moment, he froze, his one seeing eye locked on the side of his mangled face, a face she had never seen. He had disappeared not long after he had lost his eye, Donostrea crumbling had been the catalyst to his leaving and disappearing from this place. With a sigh, he slowly resigned himself. There was no time left now, and if it scared her, well, he wouldn't have long to worry about it.

He slowly turned towards her, this woman he hadn't seen since his youth, and the one person he had ever truly loved. He was older now, way older, more grey flecked his face than had been there before, and the one side, the side he had lost his eye, was still so ruined. It had never healed properly, and though was a very long lasting reminder of his terrible impulsiveness. And yet, he looked at her tenderly, his expression soft. "Shaye.." He breathed quietly, his voice shaky and weak in his emotion. He hadn't wanted this, hadn't wanted to worry her, or make her frantic, but he hadn't known how to do all this in a way that wouldn't have hurt her. He didn't say anything further, he just stared at her, wondering what she would do. What would she feel. Would she be angry, disgusted?

I'm just the speck inside your head
You came and made me who I am
I remember where it all began
so clearly.

"Burn Baby Burn"