Put the pieces back together

*Kirsi* · (This post was last modified: 03-04-2019, 05:54 PM by Kirsi.)

Perhaps the pain she shared now was simply too much for her to carry on her own; even now she wasn't completely sure she could tell him everything, but even now the thought of considering to felt like a great weight being lifted off her shoulders. She still tried to stifle the soft sobs that shook her body, hating feeling so weak even around the one she trusted the most. The feeling wasn't something that settled well with her and she wished badly she could compose herself and stand strong and certain in front of him. Crying wasn't something she did often, if at all, but the waves of grief came like a strong storm that she couldn't hide from. "You're right," she breathed softly at his promise, though even to herself she didn't sound fully convinced in her agreement. Regardless of what she thought though her need for him felt overwhelming and it was hard to pretend she could go on without him now that he'd so much as teased at togetherness again.

"You leaving... was always the worst," Kirsi agreed, a bit breathlessly as she tried to stop herself from sobbing, her voice still unsteady even when she managed to calm herself down. Somehow through all the lies and deception she had managed to convince herself that they'd make it out okay. Everything in her life had always worked to her advantage. Ignatius will understand, she'd told herself repeatedly. It seemed plausible that despite his exile they would find somewhere to settle down together, to make names of their own and to raise their family. The mere thought of their children made her very nearly lose her cool again, feeling the now-silent tears continuing to fall, though she hoped the crying was mostly masked by the way she'd buried her face into his fur.

She couldn't mask the tears for long though, for he was abruptly pulling away and looking her in the eye. He was the only one she couldn't lie to or hide her emotions from - the pain she wore now was worn plainly for him to see and to dissect. She could only hope Ignatius knew it was genuine. "I want nothing more than to be by your side. Until the end of our days." It was hard to imagine life before she'd grown to love him - and while she wouldn't admit to be a good creature by any means, when it came to him she'd always meant well. She had no doubt she'd gone about things all wrong, but it'd all been for.. well, for the both of them. Obviously things hadn't gone her way but it was hard to imagine how she could've done things differently. If she hadn't tried to betray Ignatius in the first place, would she have even given him a second glance? She truly wasn't so sure, not that it mattered much now.

The expression he gave her was hard to ignore, and she felt a similar smile prickling at the corners of her lips. "Your wish is my command," she promised him, mostly serious though not without a hint of impishness. "To Fyri I shall go. What will your sister think of.. all this?" Kirsi had to ask after a moment. Beating around the bush wouldn't do them any good. Kirsi knew exactly what Sephira thought of her and had no doubt her return would displease her.. not to mention what any other wolves from their homeland might thing if they heard of her arrival. She didn't give a shit about them, but Ignatius was more likely to be rattled by their displeasure. Who knew what the others thought, or what Valkorion had told them all? She breathed a shaky sigh, deciding only time would tell.

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