Desperation[MATURE]
07-20-2013, 12:53 PM
GERHARDT v ADETTE for MATESHIP Round 1
GERHARDT: 6/ 10 for clarity- ?in attempt to swipe at her right front? at her right front what? I realize it?s probable you meant leg, considering it?s an attempt to knock her off balance, but be careful. How is he swiping at her leg? Just straight on? Where is he going for? Her lower leg? Her upper leg? The side of the leg? 10 / 10 for powerplaying. no powerplay 5 / 10 for defenses. Head aligned, ears, lips, legs spread, body lowered, legs bent, tail, eyes narrowed. Deduction for not rebalancing when lifting up his paw to attack. 8 / 10 for attack. attempting to bite her shoulder, attempting to knock her leg over. Use of weight would be nice. 10 / 10 for injuries.No deduction first round Round One Gerhardt Total: 39/50 ADETTE: 6/ 10 for clarity- ?her head mimicking his and turning at an angle so they would be straight on.? The wording in this phrase is highly confusing, because if she was truly mimicking him she would have attacked his shoulder and not landed a jaw attack. ?. She was aiming to clash fangs with him and grab his bottom jaw? this phrase makes it hard to understand what she?s doing as well. If her head is moving to her right as she is mimicking him, their mouths would be interlocked, but she wouldn?t have a grip on his bottom jaw. The attack in general isn?t entirely clear. 6/ 10 for powerplaying. Even with her counter, she could?ve taken some damage. If their jaws were clashing, her teeth could?ve had injuries and her mouth could have lacerations.. 6/ 10 for defenses. head level, chin tucked, shoulders, tail, ears, eyes, 6 / 10 for attack. she really could?ve done more than one attack. Use of weight and use of paw could?ve helped her try to knock Gerhardt over, or a number of other things. 10 / 10 for injuries.No deduction first round Round One Adette Total: 34/50 Round 2
GERHARDT: 6/ 10 for clarity- You said Adette?s attack hit in a way, but didn?t specify damage. If it even hit slightly he should have some sort of damage or bruising to his jaw. ?toward her leg, in order to deliver his bite - and the amethyst optic on that side (the right)? His right eye would be safe, it?s his left eye that would be open to Adette?s jaws. I?m guessing there may have been confusion here with lefts and rights. 3 / 10 for powerplaying. ?The resulting blow sent his jaws recoiling an inch or two back, saving his bottom jaw from her attempt to snare it in her grasp? It?s hard to understand why her blow wouldn?t hit the way she intended. If it?s just Gerhardt?s jaws being jarred back, I can still see Adette attaining a grip. ? so he pivoted his hips to his own right (her left), attempting to bring them into an 'L' position? this is a tad bit too much movement in my opinion. 5 / 10 for defenses. eyes narrowed, head aligned, shoulders, tail, legs bent. 5 / 10 for attack. attempting to bite her leg, attempting to push his weight into her shoulder. His lowered head makes his neck vunerable, and the use of his paw here could?ve helped him cripple her leg. 8/ 10 for injuries. moderate damage to jaw (assumed because it wasn?t specified) Round Two Gerhardt Total: 26/50 ADETTE: 3/ 10 for clarity- there was some major confusion of lefts and rights in this post. Firstly, if she had moved to her left, she would?ve brought herself parallel with Gerhardt, not face to face. Secondly he aimed with his right shoulder for her, not his left. Be very careful about lefts and rights. ?that purpose was to attempt to either: place it on the upper part of his left shoulder, or completely wrap it around the left side of his neck? pick one of these. Which is she going for? Otherwise, it makes it very difficult for Andy to figure out how her character is supposed to take damage. 6 / 10 for powerplaying. You said his shoulder her hers, and she should?ve taken damage for that. At least she should?ve had bruising to her shoulder. 5 / 10 for defenses. weight on toes, tail, ears, chin, shoulders 5/ 10 for attack.attack on neck, paw on neck for balance. Use of weight against him could have been good. This position would be very awkward considering Gerhardt has a grip on her paw; Adette could potentially injure her paw further. 2 / 10 for injuries. sore jaws, grip/damage to leg, bruising to shoulder (assumed because it wasn?t mentioned) Round Two Adette Total: 21/50 Round 3
GERHARDT: 2 / 10 for clarity- ?Two inch long talons were curved and primed for the target, either Adette's eyes or some part of her face/head? don?t say or; be specific with your attacks. Otherwise it makes them incredibly difficult to respond to, and it?s a bit of PP as well. What part of her face is the eagle going for? From which side? ?Gerhardt shifted his weight forward and tucked his head lower to the ground? I realize there is a picture reference explaining his positioning, but you really shouldn?t have to rely on these to explain your positions. The fact remains that without the picture, I would not have been able to understand his posture. 0 / 10 for powerplaying. ?He was relieved when his shoulder also met its mark, jarring her to the side, but not knocking her over? when the opponent doesn?t specify damage, you can specify their damage, but you cannot dictate their movements. Aislyn did not say that Adette had been moved to the side, and it is not your right to assume she had been moved. Also I?m having a hard time seeing the timing of this; if the eagle just started moving from the sky as Adette was going for his neck, the eagle would not have time to get to Adette?s jaws before they hit. ?At the same time his head tilted to the side where her grounded forelimb remained? you cannot assume this limb was put back within his range after it was released. 9 / 10 for defenses. ears, lips, jaws, legs, neck, weight lowered, tail, eyes, claws 3 / 10 for attack. continued grip, single jaw attack. His attacks are extremely singular; he should be doing more than just jaw attacks. He?s also rather vulnerable in this position, because he stands beneath her if she falls. 10 / 10 for injuries.no new damge, counters used Round Three Gerhardt Total: 24/50 ADETTE: 5 / 10 for clarity- ? because just as the bird managed to grab hold, her jaws shut around her target? how is this possible? You did not mention that Adette?s posture moved with Gerhardt?s so if he lowered himself and she kept her grip, she?d effectively be standing on him and wouldn?t have any grip at all. ?Though his intentions had been to go for her forearm, he ended up scoring the bottom left portion of her chest, or her point of shoulder? don?t use ?or? statements. Make a definite statement. 10 / 10 for powerplaying. You cannot assume Adette?s attacks hit; Gerhardt made use of a counter, and it would still be up to Andy to decide how her jaws hit. The appropriate way to continue a counter would be a simple ?her jaws would attempt to continue their attacks? or something along those lines, perhaps specifying where she would likely end up aiming her jaws due to the movements. was just told that permission was given for this. 5 / 10 for defenses. ears, eyes, shoulders, chin, tail 4 / 10 for attack. she should?ve done another attack. Not doing one makes little sense in this situation, especially since her jaws are already in a place that could be vulnerable on Gerhardt. 2 / 10 for injuries. possibly broken paw, punctures to scruff, bite somewhere Round Three Adette Total: 26 / 50 Totals:
GERHARDT: 89/150 ADETTE: (81)83/150 + 2 for duty(warrior) And the winner is...
GERHARDT! adette must give up by either submitting, fleeing, or passing out. Damage:
GERHARDT: scarring to back of neck / scruff. will take one ooc week to heal. ADETTE: wounded possibly fractured left leg, will take two ooc weeks to heal. Notes:
I know the scores are a bit low, but I believe that on Alacritis I am a bit of a harsher judge. Both of you need to be more specific with your moves; what side are they attacking from, how are they attacking, why is this move occurring? You also need to include more moves in your posts. Ideally, you will make one jaw attack, one weight attack, and one miscellaneous other attack (use of paw, etc.) in a post. Otherwise, I thought the fight was very creative, and it was easy to follow! - By [MUSE]
|
Current time: 11-21-2024, 08:07 PM
Powered By MyBB, © 2002-2024 MyBB Group.
