but she didn't ever hold me

He looked honestly hurt at the decision she made, lilac gaze shifted from his huge form, not in shame for her actions but any discomfort she caused her vessel. Did she try to explain herself? did she owe him an apology? Should she push back even harder against him and defend the recuperation that had resulted in her night with the midnight healer? ”Don’t begrudge me this, Sirius.” She asked him softly, her eyes seeking out his sapphire ones. ”She helped me forget about.. everything.” She admitted to him, readjusting herself a little nervously. She couldn’t have him upset at her over something that meant so much. ”Is it too late to ask now?” She looked up to him, still feeling deep in her soul the need to see him happy.

She tried to focus more heavily on the important task at hand. They could be upset at personal decisions and choices all day, but they had an Empire to feed and they came first. ”Lucretia and her dog.” She started off, they were her main hunters right now. ”With Rose..” She choked back her brother’s name, he and Reaper both were gone. She took in a deep breath. ”I can recruit others, but four bodies.. that’s enough to take down an oryx or two right now.” There was hope. If they could find the large animals they could kill them. Their packs would not succumb like her father’s Empire had.