A Mother's Sadness

*Erani* · (This post was last modified: 07-29-2013, 07:51 AM by Erani.)

9

Erani

She listened to his words, and some of the ache left. The ache that eased away was from Neo?s change, his leaving. A quiet nod was given, as he mentioned Syrinx and Eos. She worried for those two. Syrinx hadn?t returned with Eos after she?d sent him to find her, when Cairo had collapsed at the meeting where Chrysanthe had taken the mantle. And oh how glad she was that Chrysanthe and Epiphron had gotten what they had wanted.

Deep blue?s studied him as he bade her to tell her story, then fell to the snowy ground between her paws. And she began to speak. ?I was born in a pack known as Redwood Pack, to Aobhinne and Alorek, the lead Healers of the pack. They were said to be the best healers in the area, other than the Nomads, who were our allies. There was an agreement between Redwood pack and the Nomads, that our warriors would train the newer generations in the Nomads to defend themselves and fight back, and one of their healers would mate into the pack. My father was a Nomad. In a way, I suppose it?s like arranged marriages in your family. But these joinings were only done if the two wolves in question loved one another. Wolves in love work stronger together. My mother is also descended from the Nomads. She and Alorek were one of those stories you hear about love at first sight.? Her eyes warmed at the thought of them, and the memory of them in the dream she?d had the night she?d nearly died.

?I?m rambling? I and my siblings were born, and Cormalin, the largest in our litter, was chosen to be trained to be the next Beta male. Our Alphas were Amoren, and Adania, who was my mother?s sister. She was barren, and could not produce heirs to take on the mantle after they were gone. But Amoren would never have mated with another female to produce heirs. I suppose that was why I was chosen? We were at war with the pack to the west, Blackmoon pack. One of the stories the elders told us as pups was that the alpha of Blackmoon pack was Amoren?s brother, and that Redwood pack used to be called Whitemoon pack, before Fenrin, Amoren?s brother, led a revolt in an attempt to gain the throne.

?Amoren?s father made him the Alpha just before he died from his wounds, and later, Amoren drove Fenrin and his followers away, far west, into a forest that would make Tortuga?s old territory look like a field of flowers in comparison. Ever since that victory, Redwood Pack, and Blackmoon pack had been at war. In Redwood, training in fighting began at six months. I had always been far more interested in watching my mother and father work their Craft in healing. I asked so many questions, what was that plant, why was that wolf whining, and so on. So she taught me, and my father taught me. And the Alpha male took special interest in me, teaching me tricks in fighting only he knew, and the finer points in honor, and so on. All the things a future Alpha should know, I suppose? But I didn?t realize that until young Sarak told us.

?Meanwhile, wolves of our pack had been suffering attacks from Blackmoon members while on patrols, like the night I was attacked. My mother and father were having to treat injuries left and right, and we had to bury some of our warriors, and one of our hunters. And then, when I and my siblings reached our sixth month of age, the attacks slowed to a trickle, and three wolves from Blackmoon came to the borders and called Amoren. The head of the trio, Blizzard, spun him a tale with his silver tongue, saying that they had run away from Fenrin?s pack, and sought refuge in Redwood.? The deep blue pools stilled, glazing slightly with icy anger. And her next words were flat. ?It was a lie. Their true purpose was to get themselves accepted into Redwood Pack, gather information while they let Redwood get used to them. The other two were Boulder and Shadow. Blizzard, white as snow, with the palest blue eyes. Shadow, black as darkness, his lower jaw marked with the color of blood, and his paws just the same, and his eyes a deep crimson. Boulder, the very color of his name, eyes a poison green, and with intelligence that suited his name. You?ll remember these three.

?Amoren?s strengths that would have served well for any other wolves that had come to our borders failed him that day. His willingness to give second chances, and his hope that something good would come from the thunderstorm. He accepted them into the pack. They stayed in Redwood for the next six months of my life. I often noticed the white one Blizzard slipping off every few days, and when he came back, he always looked pleased. Boulder?? A shudder of disgust wracked her form, and her lip curled, showing one canine. ?One only had to look at him to see that he enjoyed killing, that he would happily kill a pup for sport. He often made jokes about the pups, myself included, that involved different ways to disembowel a pup, and what parts tasted best.

?Shadow was? Unusual. He almost never spoke, but always seemed nearby, watching. He was unnerving, and his name suited him. I think that if he had had a chance? Perhaps he could have changed. I seemed to have caught his attention, and sometimes, it seemed as though he was about to say something, but then he got afraid and slunk away. In any case, my siblings and I continued our training, and I trained with my parents in the Healing Craft, and Amoren continued his private training of me. And then Spring came? And my life was ripped out from under my paws.

?I had slipped away early in the morning, wanting to gather herbs to surprise my mother with. I found several. Mint, Poppies, Lavender?. When I came back?? She closed her eyes tight, breath shuddering from her nostrils. ?When I came back, my pack was laying there. Strewn about, ripped apart, faces twisted in the agony they had felt before they?d died. My mother, my father, my siblings. My mentor and Alpha? All of them. Except Cormalin. He spent his energy on one word. ?Run?. And I obeyed him. I ran, without looking back. Ever since then I thought he was dead, until Valhalla reformed on this territory, when Collision spotted Obsidian for the first time.

?The? The first year alone, I nearly died from starvation. I didn?t care. I... wanted to die, but something always pushed me on, forced me to eat from whatever I could find. My hunting training hadn?t been completed. When shock faded away, and I was more aware? I was lost, miles from my home. After that, I hunted what I could, and that was barely enough to stay alive.. Sleep was? Horrible. Nightmares? My first winter alone was the worst winter that land had seen in years. It stayed for three months beyond the usual length of winter. The only thing I had going for me, was the fact that old animals perished from the cold. Usually, when I found one, other scavengers had already eaten most of that animal. I was never so glad to see Spring as I was at the end of that winter.

And that Spring was better. I had come to a sort of understanding. And then I managed my first kill of a larger animal. She was an ancient doe, and the way her front legs were so swollen, it was a wonder that she?s lived that long. With that kill, I started to live again. I started training myself to hunt, and even though it was dangerous, I trained myself in hunting larger prey alone. My full interest in healing returned, and I taught myself what I could about plants, testing them for effects.? She lifted her eyes to the sky, studying the stone grey clouds that threatened more snow.

?I ran across a loner that year. The first wolf I had seen since? He was babbling? And then he attacked me. It was a quick fight, and I was uninjured, and he ran off, still rambling nonsense. After that, I decided to stay away from wolves for a while. But in my third year, I came across a loner pair, expecting their first litter, and they took me in for a few months, and they wanted me to stay, but when I decided to keep going, they told me about a pack. Yours. The female had been a healer and she taught me more about healing, told me what the plants I had tested were, and their uses. And when I left, I left with her blessing. So, I wandered a little longer, before I found the borders of Starlite? And your sister, Maya, accepted me into the family. And I suppose you know the rest.?

She finished softly, taking a deep breath and lowering her gaze to his face. ?I think you would have liked Amoren, and he you. And my parents would have been glad to see that I?ve remade my life. You, and Valhalla have given me back my life, and so much more than that. My nightmares are gone. Blizzard, Boulder and Shadow chase me no longer.? She blinked slightly, throat tight. "And you? What is your story, if I may ask?"

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