you should be sad

Thalia didn't know exactly the direction Eligos would take the pack in, and admittedly part of the not-knowing made her nervous just the same. But any direction was better than none at all, and so far Eligos had proved to be a loyal follower of their God, had he not? She supposed only time would tell what would happen, and dwelling on it too long wouldn't change things - only action would. She had to devote herself to Eligos's cause, to throw herself headfirst into self-improvement and bettering her pack, and the rest would surely follow. She had no doubt Theory echoed those sentiments, if in her own way. That was one of the reasons she found herself drawn to Theory; despite all their differences they had some things remarkably in common, their devotion to their families and packs being the most striking one to her.

Theory's next question surprised her, though the previous one had been just as serious. This one just seemed somehow more daunting to answer. It was something she'd never properly sat and thought about before, though Theory was somehow forcing her to. Ignoring the question didn't feel like an option. "Yes," Thalia answered finally, the word quiet and succinct. Not having children didn't really feel like an option to her, even if the thought made her uncomfortable. How else would they carry on the Abraxas legacy when converting mortals was infinitely more difficult than simply birthing them? "I don't feel as though I really have a choice." Suddenly her mouth felt even more dry, though instinctively she leaned even further into Theory's touch. Somehow the worry of her pulling away from her in this moment seemed a worry even more daunting than rearing children or her Empire's future. Those thoughts were selfish ones, but it was hard to push them aside.

"What about you? Do you want children?" What motivated Theory was quite different than her own motivations; the Abraxas were never selfless wolves in the slightest. They would never provide shelter to those who needed it, only those who earned it or otherwise paid for it - she wondered if Theory would think differently of her for those beliefs but she had a feeling the Abaven leader already knew as much about her, even if she simply chose to ignore it.