My feeble walls are closing in

Ooc:: Set directly after Bellamy exits the raid.

“Bells wait… we should have Drifa look at your injuries.” The Devil moved in front of Bellamy and looked up at her.

“I’m not bleeding.” Bellamy wasn’t looking at him as she stopped. Her heart was pounding in her chest, head spinning… her face hurt particularly, and her head, but she refused to go over where the rest of them were.

“Something isn’t right!” Ears frowned deeply. “What the fuck happened back there? You seemed so… out of it. What’s going on?”

“Fuck off. Leave me alone.” Bellamy tried to back away, to turn to go around him, but Ears moved in front of her.

“No! Do you think it’s going to get better if you keep running from whatever it is!? Something is WRONG Bellamy, and you need help. Are you so scared of others that you refuse to admit it!?”

Whiskers had moved up alongside Ears with concern on her face.

“He’s right. You went from nervous to fighting as though your life depended on it. They were allies and you seemed about ready to rip that boy’s face off…”

Bellamy squeezed her eyes closed.

“I know! I know…” Her voice cracked.

“Acere is going to kill me.”

“Bells…”

The she-wolf opened her eyes but they were focused on the ground.

“It was like… it was like the Empire all over again. Going to battle. It didn’t matter to them if the others were innocent. Do your job. Fight. You fall, you get hurt, you’re left for dead. Kill or be killed.” She kept her ears pinned against her skull.

“You weren’t ready.” Whiskers pointed out as she came closer to Bellamy. “It was too soon… you’re hardly interacting with your own kind yet. We never should have let you do this… I’m sorry.”

Bellamy crumpled to the earth and curled around Whiskers as she shook.

“I don’t want to remember anymore…” Her voice broke with a sob as she clung to the badger.

“Shhh Bells… shh... we’re here.” The badger nuzzled her with a motherly tenderness. “It’s going to be okay. We’re not going to let you face anything alone. Even Acere, okay? I… I’m sure he’ll understand.” Her voice faltered. She wasn’t so sure of that all. Those had been allies of his pack and he had already been lenient with Bellamy once.

“I don’t belong here…” Bells whimpered as Ears drew close as well. “I’m a monster… All I do is hurt.” She kept her eyes squeezed closed. “Acere should have cast me out…” She whimpered again.

“He’s going to kill me.”