the sweet dreams that we knew so well

She was right in her thinking, had she even hinted at how much she wanted him to stay here with her he wouldn’t have looked back. He’d leave his earthly body and join her in this cold afterlife without a second thought. That wasn’t the right thing to do, he had so much life left to live, and not for himself but those that remained. His daughters and the woman that shared his den and coaxed him back from the brink. Rhyme would always love Shaye, for the rest of his life and for as long as he remained sentient.

They held onto each other, both of them silently mourning what couldn’t be. Neither able to leave the world they were in to be with the one that they wanted. Rhyme’s heart was still very much broken, and this too real dream made that more apparent. But knowing was half the battle. When he had been broken before he had willfully ignored Shaye’s death, he’d almost gone crazy as a result. Now he could admit the fact that she was gone and how much it hurt him. But he could see the path he needed to take now. No matter how much he wanted to remain here he couldn’t.

Rhyme could see through Shaye’s lie, but he was thankful for it. They both knew he had to go back, and they were both very aware of how much Rhyme would need Samara if he was going to remain in the realm of the living. She pulled away and smiled at him, but the sorrow was still there. He tried to return her grin but he felt the guilt pile up on his head. Tana was the reason the two of them had never worked out, now another woman was getting in between them. She was necessary though, and giving his broken heart to her had been easy. easier without Shaye in his arms.

”You always were a bad liar.” He whispered to her as he pulled her in close again. He felt the tears once more, but she had given him her blessing. A blessing to embrace what he had back in the living world. For him, for their daughters, and for Abaven. Samara was good for him, she was good to him, and as he held Shaye in that dream world he wondered how he could deserve such wonderful women in his life. He hated how much pain he was putting her through, and he hugged her tighter for it. He would have given his own life then and there if he could trade places with her.

”I never deserved you.” He whispered, pushing his features into her cheek, wanting so bad to be closer. To bring her back with him. Having her so close once more but knowing she still couldn’t be his. She was his other half and he knew he would never be whole again in this life. "I'm so sorry." For not being able to be with her, for breaking her heart now, for being too weak to cope with her loss.