My feeble walls are closing in

Acere · 05-18-2020, 09:47 PM

Her response to his approach both surprised and confused him. She looked like a scared pup. What did she think he was going to do? Sure he was angry, but not even he was sure what to do at this moment in time. He needed to understand why she did it, and hopefully, she'd provide a good answer to his questions. While he wanted to help her with all these...changes...there were other things he couldn't risk. After all, he couldn't fix everyone. He knew that. “I didn’t mean to!” He kept a hard gaze and a frown on his face, unwilling to falter in his stance. He had been growing to see her as a friend, but there was times he knew he'd have to act as an alpha. And this was one such time. He couldn't treat everyone as a friend all the time...perhaps he'd been too friendly to the pack. Perhaps that's why a lot of them weren't doing their duties. This situation with Bellamy was beginning to make him realize that. While it was likely he could be both at times, he couldn't be both all of the time...

"Something isn’t right, Acere. Please… take that into consideration when you pass judgment.” He glanced briefly at Bellamy's companion, flicking one ear a bit to acknowledge that he heard her, but he didn't reply to it. While he was aware her companions helped her a great deal, he didn't want them speaking for her. No...he wanted Bellamy to speak for herself for once. To see what she would come up. To hear her thoughts on the matter. “I wanted to help…” He could hear her voice shaking as he stood over her. "I wanted to do the right thing! I didn’t… I didn’t mean…” He didn't look away, even when he noticed the tears starting to form and even when she still refused to look at him. So far, he felt like she meant that...that she didn't really mean to truly harm the boy. But then...

“Y-you.. You always said… if we fell.. We were dead…” Surprise flashed on his face. He felt...shocked, at what he was hearing. “What? Acere…” Crimson gaze turned to look at the badger, the surprise slowly turning into confusion. He couldn't find any words to say. Not yet. But the same thought seemed to cross both their minds. Was she talking about him? He was so confused, but then...“Kill… or be killed… you are injured… left behind… I did what I thought you wanted… I’m sorry…I didn’t mean to make you angry… General… Please...”

Then it dawned on him...She suffered from the same illness he had. While he had worked for years to get his under control, there was the rare time that it flared up. It hadn't for a long time now, but it was still there. When he was alone. He sighed, letting some of the anger go, but not all of it. "Bellamy...I'm not your general. I never told you these things. Although now I understand why it happened." He looked at Ears and Whiskers for a long moment as the mutual understanding between the three of them was apparent now. He took a couple of steps back to give her some space. "We're not at war, Bellamy. However, given the situation...you weren't ready." He took a deep breath to calm himself. To calm his mind. She needed more time. He could see that. Before he said anything else, she needed to calm herself down. "Whiskers, Ears. Try to calm her down, will you? I need her fully present for what we are about to discuss." He motioned to his own companions to fetch some water, and perhaps a bit of a snack if they could find it. In the meantime, he sat down and waited for her to get back into her headspace.
"Speech"

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