what id give to not be alone

As soon as Sirius was out of sight Deathbelle raced to Iolaire’s cabin, she wasn’t sure what kind of relief the woman might bring but if there was anyone who could comfort her it was her once love. Though she couldn’t help but think she was jumping out of the frying pan and into the fire. Being so close to Sirius reminded her much too keenly on how distance Hannibal had been with her. She was alone in the palace a lot of the time, especially with her youngest children out and about in the world. Loneliness was becoming the norm and Deathbelle felt like she was becoming a shell.

She didn’t cry as her dainty paws brought her to the stone building, but as se came to a halt breathless the emotions she’d been holding back from Sirius rushed through her. She caught a sob in her throat as she slowly brought herself to the stone wall of the cottage. Deathbelle leaned against the building, closing her violet gaze as she struggled. Alone. She was going to be alone forever. A soft whine left her lips as she slid down the stone wall and curled into a heap in the snow. Why was she so weak? Why did she let her emotions strangle her like this? Why did she have to let go of everyone she loved?

Tears fell down her cheeks and she buried her head in the crook of her arm, feeling defeated despite being the most powerful woman in the world. What good was it when she couldn’t even share her accomplishments? She tried not to return to her what ifs, but in that moment she could do nothing else.